Age Differences

Chelsea_O
Chelsea_O Posts: 45 Member
What's the biggest age difference you've ever had between yourself and a partner?

Do you prefer to be the older or younger one? Why?

Pros?

Cons?
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Replies

  • Chelsea_O
    Chelsea_O Posts: 45 Member
    My two longest relationships with women were with older women.

    The first was only a 3 year age difference, but at 15 and 18, three years is a major difference. It was great having a gf with her own car, apartment, and independence. It made me grow up a little faster.

    The last girl I seriously dated was 9 years older than me. This one made me realize how valuable experience is... in all departments.

    At 23, I would never date a younger girl. Way too much immaturity.
  • helenarriaza
    helenarriaza Posts: 519 Member
    I went out with someone younger, being 17 and she was 14. So, no.
    Then someone my same age (18) but completely different mindsets. No.
    I noticed I preferred older, so my ex was 5 years older, she was an incredibly mean person and I went through a lot of humiliation and some serious issues with her tormenting me. Awful.

    My girlfriend is older than me, 18 years older. I honestly never expected to be with someone with such an age difference, but I realized that I cannot stand girls my age or a bit older. She is incredibly supportive, super loving and we look after each other, sometimes we don't notice it and our families can't either.
  • ThePinkPanda
    ThePinkPanda Posts: 208 Member
    I've never done a huge age difference. My partners have always been within a year of my age. i haven't noticed much of a difference going either older or younger, but maybe my gap isn't big enough. my current girlfriend is 6 months younger than me and we get along famously :)
  • MartialPanda
    MartialPanda Posts: 919 Member
    oh lawd! Idk if i can be serious with someone who is much older/younger than me. My gf and I are 6 months apart and it's great! I'm "older". It's easier to communicate and we're both in same headspace dealing with the same thing. It's very relatable. I can't imagine PERSONALLY getting that with someone much older/younger than me.

    Plus why younger - I want to go drink with my girl lmao.
  • HedgeHaug
    HedgeHaug Posts: 223 Member
    I had one girlfriend who was 6 years older....were're good friends now....and it has been a real tickler to see her go gray and grow older! Oops!:blushing: Almost forgot...old lesbians never grow older...they just fade awaaaaaaaayyyy....
  • Saratini76
    Saratini76 Posts: 115 Member
    My girlfriend now is 5 years younger than me. I guess I am attracted to younger people mainly because I must be immature! LOL I don't know, people my age just seem so.....mom'ish. I don't want to stop being young yet!

    I honestly forget my girl is younger than me. We just fit so well in so many aspects!

    :heart: :heart: :heart:
  • attackhamster
    attackhamster Posts: 58 Member
    My last ex and biggest age difference I've had was 7 years younger than me. It didn't work out because we were in such different places in life...she wanted to travel the world and stuff like that, I own a house and was ready to settle down. So we broke up after a couple months.

    My partner now is four years younger than me but we're going strong after over a year together!
  • PennyVonDread
    PennyVonDread Posts: 432 Member
    I date people the same age (ish) as me.
    I've found I only want to be in a romantic relationship with someone who's in the same place in life as me. Give or take a couple years, but I personally don't mesh well with much older or younger individuals on that level. I've gotten way too creeped out by older (romantic) interests' sexuality and life goals, and I don't want to get married or settle down or anything (ever). I also don't do well with much younger individuals because I don't want to take care of someone else. I want to be in a relationship where both of us are indepent and self-sufficient and benefiting emotionally and financially by willful union but never in any sort of dependency on each other.

    That has a lot more to do with my independent nature, and that I'm not a hopeless romantic by any means. I'd imagine attraction would probably play a factor for some people that I'm missing out on when it comes to age gap.
  • hmmmm. I'm 23 and I tried to date an 18 year old when I was 21 and another when I was 22...and it did not work out. I think anything serious would have to be with an individual 21+. This year I've dated a 27 and 29 year old, and I did feel insecure about certain aspects, such as feeling like they probably thought I was immature or could not relate to their experience. However, you are right that experience can be quite a benefit, in multiple ways ;]

    Honestly, I think I would be most comfortable with a partner who is between ages 21-26 (I will be 24 in August). However, this is more of a guideline than a rule. I have met my fair share of 19-20 year-olds who are very mature, and I have met a large number of people in their late 20s who have no idea what they are doing with their lives!
  • onemoc
    onemoc Posts: 35 Member
    the youngest I dated was 3 years younger than I was. he was 18 or 19. I've been seeing my current husband for 8 years and at first it was first for us because I wasn't ready to grow up and be mature. It took me about 4 years to be ready to settle down. So yeah he had to put up with a lot... anyone else would have been done with me, there were few areas in both of us that needed to be ironed out. but we are growing together again. Woo
  • ZOOpergal
    ZOOpergal Posts: 176 Member
    My ex was 8 years younger than me...me in my early 30's her in her mid 20's...I will NEVER do that again. It was great at first, but her immaturity really ended up killing it. Same thing others are saying, we were at different places in life and it wasn't meant to be.
  • const1ar
    const1ar Posts: 18 Member
    I think it depends on where you are in life and the maturity level of both people..Just a couple of years can make a big difference if the people are looking for different things in life at that point..for example, I am in my mid 20s but I have been on my own sense 17, work full-time in a professional career, am finishing up my Master's degree and am ready for a wedding and some babies. On the other hand some people in their mid 20s aren't even out of their parents house yet and can't plan past which bars they are hitting up the next weekend..don't judge a book by its cover, everyone is different =]
  • Trixxie90
    Trixxie90 Posts: 32 Member
    My wife is 4 years younger than I am. All of my ex's were around the same age as I am. My wife is very mature for her age, people often mistake her for the elder...must be the grey hair i'm giving her :)
  • electriq
    electriq Posts: 359 Member
    I think it depends on where you are in life and the maturity level of both people..Just a couple of years can make a big difference if the people are looking for different things in life at that point..for example, I am in my mid 20s but I have been on my own sense 17, work full-time in a professional career, am finishing up my Master's degree and am ready for a wedding and some babies. On the other hand some people in their mid 20s aren't even out of their parents house yet and can't plan past which bars they are hitting up the next weekend..don't judge a book by its cover, everyone is different =]

    This! ^
    So well said.

    As for me, my wife is 14 years older than I am, I'm 34 and she is 48. Neither of us went out looking for someone with an age difference, we just happened to find each other and fall in love. We both want the same things for our future and each bring wisdom to the relationship in our own different ways.

    In previous relationships I have mostly been with women older than I am, between 2 and 12 years difference, although I have also, not often dated younger. I'm quite an old soul so I tend to find myself more compatible with people older than myself, friends often included. That said I'm finding some more matches on the younger end of the spectrum now that I am getting older myself
  • Kaleglitter
    Kaleglitter Posts: 1 Member
    I personally Couldnt date anyone more than 6 younger but i would date someone 10 years older
  • Generally, I find women that are older than me much more attractive, possibly because I cringe at the thought of what I was like in my early 20's and I once dated a girl that was 4 years younger than me and she drove me absolutely nuts with childish behavior. I thought never again!

    The biggest age gap, I think I was 21 and dating a woman who was 42. I think she was a bit hung up on the age difference and would quite often in a joking way say that she should be dating my mother as they were closer in age.
  • ibtiamat
    ibtiamat Posts: 26 Member
    I've dated younger people, most was 3 years younger than me, but the oldest was only 2 years older than me. There really isn't any pros or cons with this except if you are 21 and your partner is not yet 21 it might be hard to get into certain places together. :(

    The reason why I say there are no pros or cons, is that just because the person is older doesn't say ANYTHING about them personally, like how mature they are. All the women I dated that were older than me were the most immature.
  • Skylara
    Skylara Posts: 20 Member
    My most recent ex was eight years younger than me. My first long-term relationship, my partner was 8 years older than me. Both happened to be in their early 20s when I met them.

    And both of them were immature.

    So I don't really think I prefer older or younger partners. I just prefer partners of the non-idiot-type.
  • aeb09
    aeb09 Posts: 424 Member
    I can't see myself dating anyone more than 2-3 years younger (unless they were unusually mature for their age) but could easily see myself with someone as much as 10+ years older. No exes to speak about, but wanted to put in my two cents. :)