Its all going so fast..

jl191

Hello all, new here..
I'm in the process of preparing for surgery (haven't decided on RNY or Sleeve) my EGD is the 9th of july. I only had to see my nut once, then the next appointment she told me she didnt need to see me anymore because I did so well. I started at 585 as of my last weigh in a few weeks ago I was down to 525(pre-op).
2 months ago this was just a distant dream, now its a reality and its scaring me. I have a bad anxiety disorder, and not on medication at the moment because I have reoccurent cellulitous that is treated with a med that can't be taken with SSRI's.
I KNOW I need the surgery, but I'm one of those google everything and freak out people. I convince myself I will be one of the negative statistics. My fiances mom had the surgery, she lost all her hair..I will lose all my hair. My sister had the surgery and dumps everytime I see her (mind you, she eats some stuff even I know shes not suppose to)
I do have pre-existing conditions that I'm convinced will effect my chance of waking up from surgery..
But despite all the anxiety I have been going through, I have stuck to the diet better then I ever thought I could.
My dietician said 100 carbs or less a day, and no carbs at all with lunch. I tend to eat carbs with lunch, and less with dinner but I still stay below my 100 carbs. She said no fruit, haven't ate a bite of fruit..I still have a desert if I have plenty of carbs left at the end of the day. I eat a Little Drummie, its a mini drumstick - 18 carbs. Which I know after surgery I won't be able to eat at all.



I've told my sister I didn't want the surgery (mom thinks I shouldn't get it, so does fiance) and tried to convince myself I could do it without the surgery..but im not so sure I can or I would have never got to this weight.

At this point I want to back out..well I dont want to back out but I want to not be scared..but I am. The fears especially picked up after the class - all that information..what If i forget to take a pill? Im suppose to take diabetes medications twice a day..and I can only ever remember it once. My blood sugar stays around 108 now even post meal..so I'm happy about that.

rpyle111

Jleighanne,

While the final decision is between you and your doctors, we are all here pulling for you to make the best decision for you. The group here has been super supportive and informative to me as I have gone through my pre-surgery process. This group has shown me a wide variety of post-surgery experiences, both good and not so good, but everyone seems to be happy to have had the surgery. That has really helped me with my doubts.

Whatever you need, let us be your support group! Spend some time reading the last few pages of topics and you will see how friendly and welcoming the group is. Feel free to add me as a friend if you like.

Rob

grim_traveller

Hi, and welcome. All of us went through the same debate before surgery, about losing the weight without it. The fact is, none of us could, and the statistics say it almost never happens. I think almost every person wishes they had done it years earlier.

Don't obsess too much about the horror stories you'll read. The vast majority never have any problems or complications. No one writes posts on the web saying what a piece of cake surgery was, they only write about the negatives.

Just remember all of the health problems you already have from obesity. Those will continue to get worse without surgery, and your weight will continue to go up over time as well. For me, surgery was a life saver.

2BeHappy2

Hello all, new here..
I'm in the process of preparing for surgery (haven't decided on RNY or Sleeve) my EGD is the 9th of july. I only had to see my nut once, then the next appointment she told me she didnt need to see me anymore because I did so well. I started at 585 as of my last weigh in a few weeks ago I was down to 525(pre-op).
2 months ago this was just a distant dream, now its a reality and its scaring me. I have a bad anxiety disorder, and not on medication at the moment because I have reoccurent cellulitous that is treated with a med that can't be taken with SSRI's.
I KNOW I need the surgery, but I'm one of those google everything and freak out people. I convince myself I will be one of the negative statistics. My fiances mom had the surgery, she lost all her hair..I will lose all my hair. My sister had the surgery and dumps everytime I see her (mind you, she eats some stuff even I know shes not suppose to)
I do have pre-existing conditions that I'm convinced will effect my chance of waking up from surgery..
But despite all the anxiety I have been going through, I have stuck to the diet better then I ever thought I could.
My dietician said 100 carbs or less a day, and no carbs at all with lunch. I tend to eat carbs with lunch, and less with dinner but I still stay below my 100 carbs. She said no fruit, haven't ate a bite of fruit..I still have a desert if I have plenty of carbs left at the end of the day. I eat a Little Drummie, its a mini drumstick - 18 carbs. Which I know after surgery I won't be able to eat at all.



I've told my sister I didn't want the surgery (mom thinks I shouldn't get it, so does fiance) and tried to convince myself I could do it without the surgery..but im not so sure I can or I would have never got to this weight.

At this point I want to back out..well I dont want to back out but I want to not be scared..but I am. The fears especially picked up after the class - all that information..what If i forget to take a pill? Im suppose to take diabetes medications twice a day..and I can only ever remember it once. My blood sugar stays around 108 now even post meal..so I'm happy about that.

So your Dr. is ok with you having Dessert but wont let you have fruit...seems kind of backwards to me.
Youll get more nutritional value from eating fruit(s) which is good for you than junk food which isn't exactly good for you & like you said, you wont be able to do that later.
Why not train yourself to eat healthy all away around now instead of later wishing & dreaming for something that's not on your list of foods?
Since you know of things that your direct family have gone through, talk & learn from them...you have direct advice at your fingertips!
Remember, the better You take care of yourself means that your outcome will be better.
So when you know/see what they have Not been cautious on, you do it better for yourself when its your turn.
Live the right way (eating & drinking all the right things so you don't lose your hair).
Because youre suppose to be learning & doing the right kind of eating now, youll know whats appropriate and good for your body/life later so you don't having the after affects of "dumping."
Im sure there are better alternatives to your ice cream drumstick...something you could get more bang for your buck!
Learn to curb your sweet tooth now because it wont be easier later, especially if youre still in your old ways of mindset.
Most of these surgeries come at a point of no return once you have it done (except the band which can be removed) so you cant be wishy washy, commit or come back later once you've established a routine of taking your required meds that youre on now because you "cant forget" once the surgery has been fulfilled & at that point youll be on even more meds/vitamins.
In a sense youre playing with fire (figure of speech), youre also speaking out of both sides of your mouth.
Verbally telling your family that you don't want it but showing up for medical appts which leads these medical people to believe you do want it, although you probably haven't told them of your inconsistency in taking or lack of taking your required meds.
If you cant handle the changes that are & will be required...eating/drinking/exercising/taking ALL of your meds, & overall taking care of yourself right then don't waste the money (yours or the insurance) or all these peoples time when youre not quite there yet.
Be ALL in it with your body, mind & soul that way its worth the journey, doing it 100% the right way the 1st time, with NO regrets.
Clearly you Can Do It because you've already lost this much weight, the surgery is a Tool to Help/Assist you with the rest.
Good luck!

jl191

I did think it was a little funky that she said no fruit at all, but the next sentence she said to eat as much as I want in the way of a carb with dinner as long as I stay under 100 carbs daily. (Which I HAVE NOT been doing, even from the first visit, I went straight to measuring everything, and only eating 1 serving.) You're right though, the ice cream is junk..and even though its less then I would normally eat before this process I know I shouldn't eat it at all.

As for the family thing, my sister knows I want it..just I want to not be scared to do it..if that makes any sense.

The medicine thing I really have to work on..I was only taking metformin once a day for like 2 years because I was taking extended release, then I got switched to regular and just havent got into the habit of taking it twice a day. (My sugars stay consistent now throughtout the day, now that I'm eating healthier; been a steady 108 all day. But still..should be taking my meds as I'm suppose to. )

(I am having an echo on my heart the 3rd..hopefully that will help put my mind at ease that they can do the surgery safely.)

MaggyMaizy2

I think many of us on this site have similar stories about pre-surgery concerns. I was having panic attacks before my RNY surgery, worrying about all of the unknowns. The day before my scheduled surgery, I was in my local supermarket, in the vitamin aisle, picking up the gummy vitamins I would need post-surgery. I still wasn't sure I would show up for surgery the next morning. A woman in a wheelchair came up beside me, searching the shelves. I asked her if I could help find what she was looking for. We started talking. It turns out that her granddaughter had emergency abdominal surgery the day before, which saved her life. This surgeon was the same one who was doing mine the next day! That brief encounter put my fears to rest. I had the surgery and, two years later, I'm still so happy I made the decision to have it.

Yes, there are lots of adjustments to make after bariatric surgery. But, there would have been many more life-threatening adjustments if I didn't have it - such as complications from diabetes and high blood pressure, chronic pain from severe arthritis, general mobility issues, and on and on.

It is your decision, but please don't feel alone in it. We are here to support you. Best wishes!

Maggy

SimplySusan63

First of all - WOW! Congratulations on choosing to look into weight loss surgery. As any of us here at this blog know, it's a hard decision and a huge step. Keep learning, keep moving forward. I agree that the decision has to be YOURS. I had the sleeve done May 5, 2014 and I have absolutely no regrets . . . NOW. I was scared. I was nervous. I was unsure. But before I had the surgery done I had to be ALL IN! This is not a quick fix or a decision to take lightly. But for me it was the right decision. I made myself write out my fears and ask myself why I thought I was afraid. I wrote it all out. That helped me to work through my fears. I also started seeing a counselor to help me work through some issues with past failures. That helped a lot.

I have a lot of great friends, but not all of them were excited about me having the surgery. That was kind of hard, but I have to admit that talking with them about the reasons for my decision to have the surgery made me that much stronger in my decision. Now I have their full support. I am down 48 lbs and I'm moving forward.

As anyone who has had weight loss surgery will tell you, surgery is not the answer to your weight problem. It is a TOOL to help you make the changes you need to make. I still have to make myself exercise, choose fruit instead of cake, measure my food and get up and move when I'd really rather sit and watch TV. If you're not ALL IN it's not a good idea to have the surgery.

As others here have said, you have the support of this group. Find a local support group as well. You should be able to find one in your area. Ask your doctor.

asia1967

WTG with the weight loss pre surgery. Like other people have said it is scary, it is your decision. You have to make sure that this is something you want and can live with this decision the rest of your life, so it is to not be taken lightly. We are here to help in any way we can. I also started out over 500 lbs and I am now down 170 lbs with many trial and tribulations in between (of my own making) so anything is possible if you will only allow yourself the opportunity to better your health.

Good luck and what ever decision you make, it is the right one.

sue100194

So.... in spite of all the anxiety and questions and fear, you are moving forward anyway! You have been doing the diet and losing weight and moving towards surgery. I think that's amazing and I think that it's your inner voice overriding your day to day voices telling you what you can and can't do. I had a lot of those same questions and concerns and issues too and found myself in the operating room anyway! Weird, huh? But it really was the right decision for me. All the comorbidities, including cellulitis are a thing of the past now. Hang in there and move forward one step at a time. The more you learn and are able to share with your family, the more onboard they will become too. It's a big deal, but anything really worth investing your time and effort into is a big deal.

katematt313

Just keep moving forward one day at a time.

You have lost a significant amount of weight. Congratulations on a job very well done so far.

You have a bit of a road to travel, but I think you can do it. You know why you should get WLS. You know how not to live post WLS (behaviors that can cause dumping and hair loss). You have all the tools you need to succeed. Trust yourself, and exert control over your behavior, and you will do fine.

For me:

Getting VSG was the best thing I ever did for my health. My only regret is that I did not do it earlier. Had I done it last summer, I would be 50+ pounds thinner than I am now. Had I done it two years ago... And so on.

Be healthy. Don't be afraid.

pawoodhull

Fear is normal. I wasn't afraid of the surgery itself, I was afraid that this, like everything else I've tried, wouldn't work for me. That once again, I would fail at weight loss and just keep getting fatter and less mobile until I was wheelchair bound. I actually prayed that God would just take me home if this wasn't going to work. That was a little over 3 years ago. I am 3 years out and still working the plan. I'm down 160 of the 226 I had to lose and I will get these last 66 pounds off, no matter how slow it happens. I am mobile again, my arthritis is still there, but 99% of the time now I am pain free. My cholesterol and sugar levels which were inching into the danger zone are both normal and I no longer have high blood pressure. This was so worth it!

Most of us have thinning, but we don't lose all our hair. And for most of us, it grows back. Mine is a lot thicker now than it was 2 years ago. Yes there are some things I can no longer eat, but most of those are by choice. I willingly gave up what I know are my trigger foods. I couldn't control myself with them before and I don't want to know I still can't so I just choose not to eat them at all. Again, this is my choice so I don't feel sad about it or deprived. I can eat whatever I want for the most part, so eating within the plan is completely my choice. The few things my tummy just doesn't like are no big deal to me, so I avoid those easily. You are very smart to see that your sister's dumping is because of what she's eating and not because of her surgery.

Several others here have said you need to be all in or not bother, I agree. If you could have done this without the surgery, you would have. None of us could do it without the surgery, that's why we all had it. This is a great tool, but make no mistake. Use the tool and you will lose the weight. Keep using the tool (for the rest of your life) and you will keep the weight off. The success of this surgery is all about using the tool. And that is a decision each of us have to make each and every day. Choose well my friend, if you are like me, your life may depend on it.

Vickil57

I had the lap band done Nov 2012 and have lost 155 pounds. Still want to lose 50 more. My highest weight was 402 and I was 370 the day of surgery. I had went thru all the tests and then chicken out. But then it got to where I could not walk very far and my husband was pushing me around in a wheelchair. I have two sisters that had the by pass and lost alot of weight and then gained it back and nothing could be done. I did alot of checking around and the lap band sounded the best for me. I have a co worker that had the lap band and done well. Also it can ge ajusted the rest of my life if needed. I have not had a fill since May 2013. It is a tool and I am so sorry I did not do this sooner. Good Luck and know that you can do this for you!!

Laura8603

For someone close to 600 pounds getting down to a healthy weight without surgery isn't going to happen. You know this. I personally know hundreds of weight loss surgery patients and none of them lost all their hair and it came back for those who lost a lot. Odds are, you will not lose all your hair without it coming back.

Loss of hair and loose skin seem to be people's biggest concerns. Being healthy and mobile again is worth that risk.

Do this for you and get your life back.

I am so thankful for my RNY. I would do it again in a heartbeat.

jl191

I had my EGD today, and let me tell you..that put my mind at ease. I was extremely anxious to be sedated, cause I had never been before..but after they gave me the sedation all my anxieties went away obviously, the surgeons were all very nice and calming and it went smoothly..so I'm very ready to take the next step (the actual surgery!) I still need an OK from the psych..he wants me to get some counseling to help with my mental issues, and I will go see him on July 28th. He seemed to think I could do it, as long as I get some counseling for my issues.
I'm down 76 pounds post-op and will be out of the 5's before I get surgery.
I stopped eating those ice creams, but I am eating a bit of fruit every now and then..better then ice cream and more satisfying thats for sure. Nutritionist just told me to keep doing what I'm doing because obviously its working..except she wants me to eat a few more calories then I am.,
On a good day I eat 900 calories, sometimes as low as 700..I find that its hard to get my calories in because I've gotten use to only eating when I am hungry, or getting my calories in without going over my sodium is probably the hardest part! I'm never under the 1300 they recommend for someone with high blood pressure

And I finally know what true hunger feels like.

garber6th

It sounds like you are making great progress! In the beginning of the whole process, things can seem overwhelming. There is a lot of information to take in and a lot to do to prepare for surgery. As you get through all of these things it will seem less overwhelming and you will see the light at the end of the tunnel. Getting control of your health will feel awesome! I think counseling is great, I have been getting counseling since before surgery and I am continuing it because it's really helping me to adjust to the new me and to my new normal. You are doing the right things and I have a feeling you will do great!