Needing Advice with Grief

glitznglamour15

So my father passed away a few weeks ago from suicide and it has been hard. Since his death I have completely stopped caring about my body which has resulted in me binging/emotional eating all the time. I have regained all of the weight that I've previous lost, which is depressing and I fee like crap. I am ready to move on and stop this poor behavior but I need some advice on how to do that. This weekend was his funeral and sea burial, which was incredibly healing for me. Thank you in advance for the advice! -Friend me-

Dennis4766

First, my prayers go out to you and your family. God will be near unto you, you are His daughter, and His heart grieves with you.

Just 2 songs I would recommend - Michael W. Smith's "Healing Rain" & "Christ Be All Around Me." I hope you can find healing in Christ.

As for the eating disorder, mine first started when I was a teen, so I've been there. You have taken the first step - admitting your struggle. Is there a woman in the church that can mentor you? Or do you want to get with a Christian counselor?

It is important to take it a step at a time, and make lifestyle changes. Begin an exercise program if you havent already. Begin logging your foods - and set up MFP perhaps for 1 or 1.5 pounds a week loss. Please dont be too aggressive, cause that can lead to further eating disorders. Remember - strive for being healthy. Your body is the temple of the Almighty. He wants you to be healthy.

Dear Heavenly Father - I pray in the precious name of Jesus for this girl.I pray that You would heal her eating disorder. I pray for her physical and spiritual health. And Father I would ask that You would send healing rain to her heart, and just heal her pain. In that name of our Savior, our Hope, and our Redeemer, Jesus. Amen.

crepes_

I can relate a bit. I did not lose my father, but I lost 4 people who were very dear to me in the span of a year, 2 of which were rather sudden, and I know how painful and confusing that can be. A friend to a brain anuerysm, my uncle to lung cancer, my grandfather in a violent home invasion, and my aunt to epigastric cancer. I'm so sorry for what happened with your father. I'd give you a million hugs right now if I could. You and your family will be in my thoughts.

I know how it can just send you into a spiral, questioning everything and somehow at the same time, not caring to know the answers. As cliche as it sounds, time is something that can heal even the deepest of emotional wounds. I was a wreck for the first few months. Couldn't watch TV because of all the violence reminding me of my grandfather, the children reminding me of the children my friend left behind, and just everything would send me right back into that spiral.

Here's what helped me, other than time.

Meditation. If you're religious, you can pray for this, but I'm not, so I just use the time to commune with myself. I sit there, try to clear my mind, focus on breathing and the air around my body. I'd sometimes do this outside so I could hear the birds chirping and feel the breeze and sunlight on my face. I'm sure the extra vitamin D helped, too, but I'd always finish my sessions with a huge smile on my face.

Self nurture. I realized that I'd become pretty anhedonic after the deaths, like I deserved no happiness because other people were going through more difficult times than me. To counter this, I started making big efforts to take care of myself more and treat myself with the respect I deserved. Long bubble baths, manicures, pedicures, self-pampering in general. It helped so much.

Keeping busy. I'd normally let the binges and sobfests happen when no one else was around, or when I was just overwhelmed with emotion. It's much easier to deal with things one bit at a time, and having a busier schedule and lots to do makes it easier to not dwell on things for too long.

I really hope you heal from this soon. It can be terribly painful to lose anyone, for any reason, but I can only imagine how painful it can be for you. Try and stay strong and know that you have someone to talk to if you need me.

girlviernes

Losing your father to suicide just has to be so incredibly hard. This is going to take a long time to get through, and it makes so much sense that you would go back to a coping method that worked for you in the past. Please be kind to yourself in this time and take in one step at a time, one day at a time. You can lose that weight again, and you will at the right time. I really like crepes post with some other ways you can take care of yourself right now. Try some things out, get sleep, and take your time.