Any advice?

TriLaura

So, I'm at a complete loss. I feel disappointed with everything right now. I weighed in today (which is probably the cause of this feeling) and find that I'm at 89.7kg. Basically, in 8 months, I've put on 9.6kg. All of my measurements are up by 3-4cm. I feel like a giant whale. All of my clothes are tight and I don't feel comfortable in my own skin. (Which is all a very weird sensation when I once weighed in at 145kg!)

Running - my favourite thing of all - has become so very hard. Being heavier is making me slower and making it harder to run. All that is doing is frustrating me to no end.

And the worst bit of all? 2000-2200 cals - that's what I've been eating. Not the TDEE of about 2800 my fitbit suggests I can eat - or the 2500 my Garmin Vivofit suggests. I'm confused and annoyed. I am starting to run out of clothes!

The very thought of eating up around 2800 blows my mind. I understand the theory of it, but when I've gained so much weight and size in 8 months, I can't fathom the thought of eating more and potentially getting bigger and heavier.

I feel like such a failure at the moment. I thought I had it all figured out and now I know I don't.

I'd really appreciate some advice or thoughts on what to do because honestly, I just don't know what to do.

Jennbecca33

Hi TriLaura, I'd be happy to try to work through this with you or get someone else who can help. Can you give me more information about yourself? Age and height, and also, what is your dieting history? It looks as though you've lost a lot of weight in the past...how did you lose that weight and have you been following EM2WL guidelines or are you new to the process?

And have you been consistently tracking your calories for the last 8 months to know that you haven't been going over the 2200 mark consistently? And what type and how long are you working out every week?

Usually the fitbits can be trusted and if anything, they underestimate on weight training and non-step based activity, which could actually give you an even higher TDEE if you are doing those types of activities.

I'll wait to hear back from you!

TriLaura

Hi Jennbecca, thanks for the reply. To answer your questions:

I'm 176cm (5f 9) and am 39.

My Dieting history goes a little like this:

2008 - weighed in at 145kg
2008-2010 - used Calorie King (Au) to track calories. I was (and still am) pretty strict at tracking. For the first year I followed CKs calorie advice (I think I was eating around 2200 to begin with) and ate back all of my exercise cals. From mide-2009 I was eating around 1500cals and eating back between 0 and half of my exercise calories. I didn't follow a 'diet', just ate mostly veg and meat, ate pasta once a week, had bread some days - was not low carb or anything of that nature, though I did find keeping carbs to around 45% was good for me.

May 2010 - weighed in at 75kg

2010-2012 - became a bit obsessed with triathlon, did the summer series and then trained for a half ironman in Nov 2011. Ate 1500cals with some of my exercise cals. I realise now how little I was eating back then. Maintained my weight around 77-78kg throughout. Was averaging 8-12hrs a week training. My appetite basically disappeared.

2013 - decided to train for a marathon, got to within a month of the race then injured my knee. Was eating around 1800cals-2000cals a day. Never really felt hungry at all.

Throughout the last few years I exercised everyday - mostly gym work with some machine cardio until I discovered running in late 2009. When I took up triathlon, I trained every day, sometimes twice a day. 2011 I pretty much gave up strength training to focus on the triathlon training. Bad error on my part, but hey.

So in Dec 2013, I read Leigh Peele's book Starve Mode, realised how low my calories were and tried a full metabolic reset - no official training, just walking, eating 2000-2200 cals. Did this for 3 weeks (I know now that wasn't long enough). My weight stabilised at 80kg, I lost a lot of bloating/puffy water weight and felt really good. Went back to the gym, slowly started running again.

I've been eating 2000-2200 pretty much consistently, sometimes dipping to 1900 unintentionally. My aim was to gradually increase so that I could finally hit my TDEE and eat around 2500-2700. Never really got there. The weight just came on, freaked me out and, well, I thought persisting would help, so stayed at the 2000-2200 level.

All this year, I've been following a workout program of 3x 45min weight training, 3x 30-40min running. I've been doing the SL 5x5 program for about 2 months and can see that I am getting stronger, so I'm happy with that. I've finally got my appetite back now. I actually get hunger sensations, although in the last month I've been ravenous.


In short, I know I've made some big errors, both with exercise and diet. I knew this year was a recovery/healing year but I honestly didn't think that I'd still be struggling with this 8 months down the track. There has been a lot of stress in my life (personal and work related) and I'm working on getting more restful sleep (I'm averaging 6.5hrs - up from 5.5hrs), as well as reducing stress and increasing relaxing / healing practices.

As you might suspect, I am terrified of regaining my weight. I was obese from the age of 5 until 32, when I finally found a way to lose it. I just don't want to go back. I have this horrible, deep down voice that keeps telling me I'll eventually be back to 100kg or 145kg no matter what I do. I have days where I just feel like I can't do this any more and feel like I might very well lose myself in some sort of eating fest (I don't really experience binge eating). Today was the first time I've weighed in since June. 3kg in 3 months is probably not massive, but considering my calories have stayed 2000-2200, it scares me no end. If I can gain weight eating the same calories, what happens when I increase again?

Jennbecca33

Ok, thank you for that information. It sounds like you've been through a lot the past several years diet and training wise. You made some good steps towards resetting, but like you said, just didn't do it long enough to achieve the full benefits of a reset. I'm going to have Anitra look in on this thread and give her advice as well, but I think a full 8-12 week reset is what you need at this point.

Your body is reacting to several stressors at this point - calorie restriction, over training, lack of sleep and personal stress. Great job on working to alleviate some of that stress and getting more sleep. Stress can have a major effect on our efforts. I think your fitbit is probably accurate in estimating your TDEE around 2700 - and your TDEE could actually be higher because Fitbits underestimate on weight training. So even with you eating between 1900-2200 calories, you have still been creating much too large of a deficit. Add on top of that the other stressors I mentioned and it's just not a good combination for your body to function in.

I understand your feelings of not wanting to gain any additional weight going through a reset. But looking long term, it would be the best thing for your body and metabolism...otherwise you may continue this struggle for years to come. Everyone reacts to resetting differently. You may not gain any weight or you may gain some initially. When I personally started increasing my calories, my body just began to drop a few pounds with every increase. I'm not saying that will happen for you, but everyone is different. It is clear your body does need more calories! If you increase your calories slowly, that will help to minimize some of those initial gains that some can experience.

I would suggest slowing increasing your calories - maybe by 100 per day/per week - until you reach your TDEE. I would go with your fitbit TDEE (just take a monthly average and use that as your TDEE). Once you reach your TDEE level, you need to eat there consistently for 8-12 weeks minimum. I would also decrease some of your running and focus on your weight training. Since you enjoy running - maybe just do it twice a week for shorter sessions. Give yourself 2 full rest days every week. Keep working on improving your sleep and stress levels. It will be a process, but we will support you along the way and I know you can do it! EM2WL.com has great support forums and team members who can help you through every step. Let us know your thoughts on this!

Again, I'm going to have Anitra come take a look at and give her thoughts as well...

heybales

Couple of things to think about, that might shed light on the TDEE estimates from your activity trackers.
As Jen mentioned of course, if you haven't manually correctly for exercise it's terrible at estimating like lifting or frankly running hard, your TDEE is even higher.

But the other direction, you could have lost muscle mass on prior dieting attempts, and while what you have is strong, it ain't average.
Therefore your BMR those devices uses to base all non-moving time on, is lower than it is using.

Ever gotten a decent bodyfat % estimate? BIA scale is around 10% accurate, skinfold and measurement method can be up to 5%, average several together you got something to work with. You don't picked highest or lowest - average.
If you have not - www.gymgoal.com/dtool_fat.html

Then see what the Katch BMR would be by using the BF% figure here.
http://www.gymgoal.com/dtool_bmr.html

Now to compare to what Fitbit is using, Vivofit is similar, just have to find it.
On the Log section, Activities tab, look at the resting calorie burn per 5 min. That figure / 5 x 1440 = BMR they are using.

How do they compare?

Because actually you could be other way around, and could have better LBM than average, and your BMR is actually potentially higher - meaning you have even a bigger deficit than you think.

Of course at this point, you are eating at maintenance, because your body has slowed down. Fitbit and Vivofit are merely reflecting the potential burn of a healthy body.

Also, that lifting routine needs some good recovery, like 36-48 hrs.
Is that running immediately after the lifting before your body tries to repair - or are you doing it the day after while body is trying to repair?
If the next day - how intense are you making it?

Guess how your body views unrecovered exercise time after time?
Stress.

Usually this balances out - you enter your lifting workout tired enough that while it may feel like you are giving it your all, you actually aren't because muscles are just plain tired. So you really don't get a hard enough workout that needs recovery.
But still stressful mediocre workout after mediocre workout, not really able to recover and actually repair and rebuild the way it would like to.

And just using my spreadsheet on your exact activity using Mifflin BMR, I show TDEE of 2444 with otherwise sedentary daily activity, which your Fitbit is probably showing you are not at all, so higher than that.

norcal_yogi

my advice..... overtaining and stress. let go of some of the exercise. also.... i personally would try eating less for a iittle while... not more. it doesn't matter what your divices read... or online calculators... your true TDEE is likely less than what they are saying. to me, that's obvious. you need to burn more than you are taking in...to lose.

AnitraSoto

I totally agree with everything that Jenny has said. To me it really sounds like stress may be a very large factor in your journey, and I would really try to work on decreasing it wherever possible. The body sees exercise as a stress, and will react negatively to too much of it - other stresses include eating at a deficit, lack of sleep and just day-to-day life. Obviously, some types of stress can not be avoided, but others can be reduced...

Like Jenny suggested, I would really concentrate on the strength training and maybe back off on the running in order to give your body time to recuperate and recover between workouts. It sounds as though you are doing great on the lifting so far and are seeing improvements, so that's great!

I know how hard it can be to push forward , but like Jenny, I would recommend continuing to work towards that re-set. You said yourself that you did not give it enough time the first time around, so I would just stay the course now. You can remain at this level for as long as you feel comfortable, and increase as slowly as you want to. There is no set-in-stone time-frame, and every body is different. To me, it just sounds a though your metabolism has been suppressed and just needs some time to accept and trust the fact that the intake will be consistent. I also truly believe that reducing the stress will be key. You have gotten some excellent advice and could not agree more :-)

TriLaura

Thanks Jen, Heybales and Anitra.

Heybales, I had a DEXA scan in 2010 and it told me my BF was 23%. Had a BodPod done in 2011 and it told me my BF was 24%.

I also took a look at the gymgoal pages you suggested. Told me my BF was 29.8% (which I feel is pretty accurate) and that my BMR was 1735.

Fitbit resting calories were 5.9, which when plugged into your formula, comes to 1699. So marginally lower, but pretty close.

I am finding the Vivofit a weird creature to understand. On a rest day, with no exercise, Fitbit tells me around 2500 cals burned, whereas Vivofit is more like 2100. It always under estimates my calorie burn, even on training days, by about 100-200cals. Sometimes more.

My running and weight training days are separate - I don't do both on the same day. I think my legs would murder me! But you're right, I do them on back to back days:

Mon - weights
Tue - Run
Wed - weights
Thur - run
Fri - weights
Sat - rest
Sun - run

I could take out the run on Tuesdays, but when you say complete rest day, can I at least walk? I am very restless and have trouble doing 'no' exercise.

Thanks for the support and advice. I know I should probably just eat more, but that's easier said than done. I think working on reducing stress, increasing rest and sleep, and fueling well is the place to start.

AnitraSoto

I think working on reducing stress, increasing rest and sleep, and fueling well is the place to start.

I think you nailed it with this sentence --- reduce the stress and fuel your body...

heybales

My running and weight training days are separate - I don't do both on the same day. I think my legs would murder me! But you're right, I do them on back to back days:

Mon - weights
Tue - Run
Wed - weights
Thur - run
Fri - weights
Sat - rest
Sun - run

I could take out the run on Tuesdays, but when you say complete rest day, can I at least walk? I am very restless and have trouble doing 'no' exercise.

If you wanted a hard run, just because you like the feeling, doing it after the lifting would be best. Short and hard. Sure you'll be tired, but it's the feeling you are after usually if you really want that. So the fact it's slower but feels hard still is just fine.

You can run the day after lifting, but it needs to be slow enough to not cause it's own load that needs repair. Walking is of course fine. But even a proper run shouldn't be over 1 hr really, walking could be longer though.
Active Recovery HR zone is what that level is called, low enough to increase blood flow, get waste out, oxygen in, aid repair process. But for many they can't slow down that much, or think they can't. So they'd rather just walk.
In this chart it's called fat-burning zone, which is the more recent fad name given to Active Recovery zone.
www.calculatenow.biz/sport/heart.php?

But I'd say while applying the advice above, perhaps walking would be best, because impact is stressful on body.

Had a workout break in last 6 weeks?
Might be time to recalc TDEE for walking only during your normal workout time, only do that, and eat that TDEE level for a week.
That will be lower, perhaps what you've already been doing. So making activity match eating level.
Then start the lifting again with walking, and increasing the eating by 100 or 200 weekly until at TDEE. Fitbit estimated TDEE with manually corrected lifting workouts entered in.
Once up to that TDEE, then could add slow running back, then eating at that higher TDEE.