Newcomer: finding the right group for me.

bealeaf

I attended my first meeting this past week.

I feel like I'm just testing the waters right now. I've read through the first 4 steps, and I'm already having trouble.
It seems absolutely backwards to me to admit that I have no control over food, because I'm SO AFRAID that I will use that as an excuse to eat everything.

I really hope that being honest with myself about all of this will help me. but I'm also feeling a little... out there? Scared? Alone? I don't know anyone else (aside from my mother when i was very very young) who goes to OA meetings, and so I don't have anyone to talk to about all my thoughts aside from my boyfriend (who has been pretty darn supportive) but I feel like I need someone to tell me what to do.

I'm going to try a few different meetings to see if there's a group of people that I connect to more so than another. I was the youngest person by far in the first meeting I went to.

If any of you have words of wisdom, I sure would like to hear them!

GrokRockStar

Hi Bealeaf,
Hang in there, finding the right meeting can be challenging. Some people say, “a meeting is a meeting”, which in my experience have found to be incorrect. It’s normal to feel awkward and uncomfortable, which is why I try to stick with a meeting a few times. If I’m not gelling with the group, then I take a deeper look to make sure that I’m not making excuses to leave meetings altogether. It’s a process, and things will fall into place. Try phone meetings, tune in and listen, then share when you’re comfortable. Also surround yourself with fellow OAers because we can all relate to each other, you’re not alone.

Canwehugnow

I'm relatively new to the meetings as well. I went for a month, didn't go for a month and now I'm starting back up. It was hard to connect (and not feel alone). The meeting I attend seems like the people all already know each other and have developed a strong bond already. But, that's not any reason I shouldn't feel included. (I'm also one of the youngest that attends, so I understand that.) I've also joined the OA ground on Facebook, and they seem to be helping. You are definitely not alone.

sanddollar

Good luck! I have been to 3 meetings so far. I'm not sure I fit in either, but I finally got 2 books at the last meeting I went to. "Abstinence" and "the 12 steps and 12 traditions."I've read a little from each every day or two and those have helped me understand the program much better!! Each time has gotten a little easier.

GrokRockStar

There's lots of literature out there, and also the OA website (OA.org) with lots of helpful info.