Things you shouldnt hear at the OBGYN

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2

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  • da_bears1008
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    Well, I haven't seen that before.
  • da_bears1008
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    Well, this doesn't taste right...

    bahahahahahaha
  • Cliffslosinit
    Cliffslosinit Posts: 5,044 Member
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    Well, I see besides the 4 condoms I've already pulled out, a watch, ball-gag and....
    Oh, wait, is that a tootsie roll?
  • Galatea_Stone
    Galatea_Stone Posts: 2,037 Member
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    Hello! Hello hello hello hello (hello....)
  • Of_Monsters_and_Meat
    Of_Monsters_and_Meat Posts: 1,022 Member
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    I found this story on the internet, enjoy
    I went to see dear ol' Dad earlier today, and somehow our conversation ended up drifting to obese individuals. He told me that he remembered once when my mother came home from work at a clinic with a harrowing tale of a whale in need.
    She waddled into the office, complaining of pain and discomfort in her nether-regions. So they rolled her on into a room to get her vitals taken while my mother prepared to examine her. My mom walks in and asks what seems to be the problem. The woman explains that she has been experiencing pain in her vagina. So of course my mom gets the gloves, puts a mouth mask thing on, and heaves her legs up into stirrups and moves the folds around to find her vagina.
    My dad got gravely serious at this point, telling me "camel, your mother told me she knew that this woman hadn't cleaned herself in years. The stench was unbelievable, and there was a dark, thick, forest in between her legs." At this point my mouth is hanging open in disgust, but he continues on.
    "Your mom told me she was literally mouthing "what the ****, what the ****" behind her mask as she continued to search through the forest. Finally, she told the patient that she would be right back, and she went to find the doctor. She told him You have got to see this. I'm not going back in there alone."
    This woman had ticks in her vagina. Her vagina. They were swollen the size of a nickel. He said my mom lost count at 7, and that's when she got the doctor. You know what the doctor said? "Ma'am, you need to clean yourself and lose some weight. That is your problem. Otherwise you wouldn't have ticks in your vagina. Go home and clean yourself."
    Apparently my mom said the woman got pretty upset and cried, and I'm not sure what happened after that.. but damn. The dude ain't wrong. ****in' ticks? I never thought I'd get to hear a story like this from the family.
  • InForBacon
    InForBacon Posts: 1,508 Member
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    Oh *kitten*, I lost my watch.
  • MiloBloom83
    MiloBloom83 Posts: 2,723 Member
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    Nurse, strap a board to my *kitten*. I'm going in!
  • _errata_
    _errata_ Posts: 1,653 Member
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    Did you know you're pregnant?
  • Escloflowne
    Escloflowne Posts: 2,038 Member
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    Can you hold this back for me?

    No lie, we heard this ALL THE TIME

    No!!

    On obese patients? Absolutely.

    Omg *cringe*

    812520.gif
  • Original_Sinner
    Original_Sinner Posts: 180 Member
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    Hey! I found your ex husbands missing ring!
  • Kamikazeflutterby
    Kamikazeflutterby Posts: 775 Member
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    Oh wow, pez!
  • asdowe13
    asdowe13 Posts: 1,951 Member
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    Is that a banana peel?
  • TheSnarkasticSkyscraper
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    Well would you look at that. I can put my whole fist up there, open my hand and wiggle my fingers.

    Who would have thought?
  • jnichel
    jnichel Posts: 4,553 Member
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    ECHO....ECHo.....ECho.....Echo....echo.....
  • baba_helly
    baba_helly Posts: 810 Member
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    is that a carrot?
  • cakebatter07
    cakebatter07 Posts: 814 Member
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    Say cheese
  • asdowe13
    asdowe13 Posts: 1,951 Member
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    Her : Put one finger in there.
    Put a second finger in.
    Put a third finger in.
    Put your whole hand in.
    Now, put your other hand in.
    Now clap.

    Him: I can't

    Her: Tight! Isn't it?
  • JustFindingMe
    JustFindingMe Posts: 390 Member
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    Well, this doesn't taste right...

    *Snort*