What is off limits to you?

catherine4211

I can understand this.. no you're not a bad person.

But like I said, he will have baggage and hopefully you're not a rebound? Then again, I've heard of these types of situations working out great!

Well I am trying my best to stay mature about all of this and not get too attached. In the 5 weeks that we have been talking we have exchanged 3,220 text messages. And have talked on the phone for at least an hour total. Which is amazing for me because I HATE talking on the phone. We shall see.......and of course I will keep you posted!

that's a lot of texts!! don't hate me but sounds like an emotional affair, that he was having???
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Well I know he liked me. But it's not like I ever told him to break up with her and date me. I haven't met a guy I've wanted to date in over 2 years. I haven't been out on an actual date in that long. And I was supposed to not talk to the one guy I actually like? NO WAY IN HELL I WOULD HAVE SUCCEEDED IN THAT.

ElementalMoe

I never pursue, but seem to always attract men in unhappy marriages. One was a sweetheart weakling of a man, the other was a dog just looking to get laid. . . It was easy to say no to the dog, but not so easy saying no to the sweetheart. . .

I wouldn't actively pursue any one in a relationship of any kind however, I will flirt my *kitten* off if they initiate and I'm attracted. I love attention.

Actually, I'm not much of a pursuer period.

christine24t

There was a guy I knew for about nine months...I mean, I sat ahead of him in class for one semester, didn't see him all summer, and then started talking to him the next semester. Eventually, we started "dancing" at the bar...
Once time I was apprehensive about dancing with him because the dance floor was lit up. He thought it was for a different reason and told me he was dating a girl in our class but she wasn't there that night. I think they dated for a couple of months. In my defense, it wasn't FB official, no FB photos, didn't sit by each other in class. I still danced with him whenever I could, and if he had made other moves, I can't say I would have turned him down.

But normally I'm not like that!

Lizi19

I always say that anybody in a relationship is off limits. I try to think of all guys with wives or gfs as asexual beings. Sometimes this mode of thinking backfires. I get really shy around single guys, but I am a lot more outgoing around taken guys because I don't see them as potentials. I think some girls have thought I was trying to steal their guys and one guy started to develop feelings for me when he was still in a relationship.

kimi131

If he's in a relationship, whether married, engaged, or part of a couple, he's off limits to me. I wouldn't want someone to pursue my significant other, so I extend the same respect. That's never kept me from crushing though

JanieJack

If a guy is married, I won't even associate with him (outside of work) unless his wife is involved/cognizant. I have a very strong red line against adultery.

If a guy I like is seeing someone, I will still get to know him in a group setting, and I will not be flirty beyond what his girlfriend does. If his girlfriend is the type to flirt with all the guys in the room and would not be offended I'll joke-flirt here and there with him (along with the other guys), but not if she's the mousy type who would be offended by that I won't. If a guy who has a girlfriend tries to pursue me, I will continually bring her up as a sign that I honor their relationship and will not cross that boundary.

Guys who pursue me while stringing someone else along (who thinks they're exclusive) turn me off.

meshashesha2012

my off limits:
guys in relationships : even if they arent happy and want to leave the other person. the fact that he is OK with staying unhappy in order to keep the peace, just shows me he has no balls. and honestly what the hell do i want with a ball less man?

mean guys, controlling guys, racists : most of the guys i date are white because those are the guys who regularly approach me and will ask me out. it always surprises me when one will think it's OK to say something disgustingly racist about an asian, a mexican, etc and not expect me to be like WOW i wonder what the dude says about black people. any guy who has to know my whereabout every minute of the day is a no... any guy who gives off controlling red flags like trying to monopolize my time too soon, showing up unexpectedly too much, calling too much hen we've just met all go in the no pile. there was 1 guy i went on one date with the day before thanksgiving. the next day (thanksgiving!) he called more than 10 times and sent multiple text messages asking where i was :explode: crazy much?

asexual men : just.no.


everyone else i will give at least 2 chances

shamrck44

Off limits to me is anyone who has made a commitment to someone else. Any exclusive relationship means that he made a promise to someone else, if he can't keep a promise to her, he won't keep a promise to me.

pa_jorg

girlfriend or wife is all the same to me. No difference, just a bit of paper!

This ^^

Funny though because I have the opposite mentality. I always assume everyone is off limits unless they prove themselves otherwise to me - at least in real life. Kind of like "Innocent until proven guilty" but more like "Married until proven single". :laugh: