Conversation with my mom
Options
BondBomb
Posts: 1,781 Member
Mom: What are you going to do about your son and chuch.
Me: I think I will let him go to catholic school like I did and make up his own mind when he is older.
Mom: What about you?
Me: What about me?
Mom: What are you going to do?
Me: Mom, Im an atheist.
Mom: No you're not.
Me: Ok. (sips protein shake)
Me: I think I will let him go to catholic school like I did and make up his own mind when he is older.
Mom: What about you?
Me: What about me?
Mom: What are you going to do?
Me: Mom, Im an atheist.
Mom: No you're not.
Me: Ok. (sips protein shake)
0
Replies
-
That's really hard....parent's are difficult to deal with in this situation. My mom thinks I'm going to all of a sudden believe in god or have religion once I have children. I don't even know what to say to her. Basically all I that you can say is that she has her beliefs and you have yours, and you're not trying to force your way of seeing things (being an atheist) at your mom so can't it be left alone.0
-
Haha..... that's a good one. Thats pretty much my mother's attitude.... avoid confronting it, its not happening.0
-
Haha..... that's a good one. Thats pretty much my mother's attitude.... avoid confronting it, its not happening.
I think they get this attitude from their beliefs, they are afraid to question things because deep down they know the answer, so it's easier for them to bury their head in the sand.0 -
Me: I think I will let him go to catholic school like I did and make up his own mind when he is older.
I have had issues because my wife really wants us to christen our son and I am an Atheist. I have agreed to do it on the basis that I was christened and want to give my son the same choices I had.0 -
I don't know how this fairy tale got so big that our parents actually fear for us when we don't believe in it. I have to remind my mom that only 33% of the world's 7 billion people actually believe in this Jebus fellow, so that's 2.3 billion believers and 5.7 NON - believers. Who's nuts now.0
-
Me: I think I will let him go to catholic school like I did and make up his own mind when he is older.
I have had issues because my wife really wants us to christen our son and I am an Atheist. I have agreed to do it on the basis that I was christened and want to give my son the same choices I had.
I think it is important to give our kids knowledge about religion, and if it starts with christening them, then so be it.
I did not though. But what I do, is give them as much information about all religions as possible (when they started asking). My kids are now 13 and 15. It does kind of surprise me when they do not understand a religious reference in books or a movie, but I did grow up Catholic.....so it was shoveled down my throat from the time I was born.
I bought them a book that is informative and it breaks down (simply, but better than nothing) the essence of a mitt full of religions in the world. I can not remember the name of the book off the top of my head (I am at work or I would get off my butt to look).
But this seemed to help a lot with questions they were coming up with about religions. They now know that I am an Atheist, but I did not want to tell them for so long until they were able to grasp this concept because I wanted them to THINK for themselves and not have someone else dictate their beliefs, especially me.
They are still searching their way through all the information out there, but I am very confident that when they do choose a belief system that it will be there own:)
That is the best feeling.0 -
If you teach your kids to think, to question, and to demand evidence, they will not only form their own beliefs throughout their childhood, but those beliefs will probably be the same as yours. BONUS.0
-
Me: I think I will let him go to catholic school like I did and make up his own mind when he is older.
I have had issues because my wife really wants us to christen our son and I am an Atheist. I have agreed to do it on the basis that I was christened and want to give my son the same choices I had.
I think I'd let my wife (if I had one) christen our child (if we had one) but I'd do so because I know it doesn't really do anything. I mean, why not? I don't think it gives the kid any choices he wouldn't have had if he weren't christened, but OTOH, it's not really any kind of a handicap either, unless it ends up leading your wife to actually have him participate. Baptism is one thing, confirmation quite another.0 -
Me: I think I will let him go to catholic school like I did and make up his own mind when he is older.
I have had issues because my wife really wants us to christen our son and I am an Atheist. I have agreed to do it on the basis that I was christened and want to give my son the same choices I had.
I think it is important to give our kids knowledge about religion, and if it starts with christening them, then so be it.
I did not though. But what I do, is give them as much information about all religions as possible (when they started asking). My kids are now 13 and 15. It does kind of surprise me when they do not understand a religious reference in books or a movie, but I did grow up Catholic.....so it was shoveled down my throat from the time I was born.
I bought them a book that is informative and it breaks down (simply, but better than nothing) the essence of a mitt full of religions in the world. I can not remember the name of the book off the top of my head (I am at work or I would get off my butt to look).
But this seemed to help a lot with questions they were coming up with about religions. They now know that I am an Atheist, but I did not want to tell them for so long until they were able to grasp this concept because I wanted them to THINK for themselves and not have someone else dictate their beliefs, especially me.
They are still searching their way through all the information out there, but I am very confident that when they do choose a belief system that it will be there own:)
That is the best feeling.
I'm confused. I certainly believe in teaching kids comparative religion, and to question and seek knowledge, bu WHY wouldn't you tell them you are an atheist as soon as they became conscious that some people believe in a god? If you want them to think for themselves, is religion really the best place to lear that? Because until you told them you DON'T believe in god, all their knowledge and experience comes from people who DO believe in a god, and if you want them to think, rationalism is more suited to thinking than religion, don't you think? I can't imagine that it's a harder concept than that an omnipotent, omniscient, omnibenevolent supernatural being can hear them when they "pray," along with every one else who is praying, and who, despite loving them, will more often than not ignore their prayers anyway. And he'll burn them alive forever if they're "bad." THIS seems like a difficult concept to grasp. Contrast that with the atheist's belief:
That's right, nothing. Atheism is an easy concept to grasp.0 -
I'm inclined to agree, 100%.0
-
My father's side of the family is very very religious, luckily my mother is not in the least and I don't have problems with them.
As Boyfriends mother and her side of the family are extremely conservative Christians we've discussed already how would we go about having a wedding, and should we have children how they'd be raised. He's been extremely open and said that he doesn't want to raise a child to be any religion in particular and would have no problems with being married by a justice of the peace without the churches involvement. He admits though that he isn't sure how his mother would feel about that one.
I guess I am lucky in that I have a wonderful partner who has no prejudices and has always been very open. We've never had any arguments over our different beliefs, perhaps because we're both able to make fun of ourselves and not take the world so seriously.0 -
Me: I think I will let him go to catholic school like I did and make up his own mind when he is older.
I have had issues because my wife really wants us to christen our son and I am an Atheist. I have agreed to do it on the basis that I was christened and want to give my son the same choices I had.
I think it is important to give our kids knowledge about religion, and if it starts with christening them, then so be it.
I did not though. But what I do, is give them as much information about all religions as possible (when they started asking). My kids are now 13 and 15. It does kind of surprise me when they do not understand a religious reference in books or a movie, but I did grow up Catholic.....so it was shoveled down my throat from the time I was born.
I bought them a book that is informative and it breaks down (simply, but better than nothing) the essence of a mitt full of religions in the world. I can not remember the name of the book off the top of my head (I am at work or I would get off my butt to look).
But this seemed to help a lot with questions they were coming up with about religions. They now know that I am an Atheist, but I did not want to tell them for so long until they were able to grasp this concept because I wanted them to THINK for themselves and not have someone else dictate their beliefs, especially me.
They are still searching their way through all the information out there, but I am very confident that when they do choose a belief system that it will be there own:)
That is the best feeling.
You are doing the right thing. I was taught one way of believing and only one. "Mormonism". It took me a very long time to realize that that wasn't the kind of life I wanted. It took me a long time to 'let go of god' and everything else mormon'. I have 3 grown children (19, 21 & 24) and raised them being open and honest with them. We had very open communications about any subject, including religion (sex, morals, logic, questioning the norm, etc) and all the baggage that comes with a religious background. They are now very well adjusted, forward thinking, loving, giving Adults.We always told them that we wanted them to think for themselves and not always go along with the crowd. It is very rewarding to know that your children's opinions and beliefs are their own and not little copies of ourselves. It is so important that they are searching their way through all the information out there, being exposed to all sides so they can make 'informed' decisions. Looking forward to getting to know many people in this group. Thank you for your post.0 -
If you teach your kids to think, to question, and to demand evidence, they will not only form their own beliefs throughout their childhood, but those beliefs will probably be the same as yours. BONUS.
I agree with every word...0 -
When I was trying to explain to my mom why I don't believe in god anymore, I said, "I just can't believe god is real."
Her response, not her literal response but the essense of it, was, "Well, what's that got to do with it?"
Remember for most people, "atheist" doesn't mean "I just can't believe god is real," it mean "I am in rebellion against god and I want to lie and cheat and steal and fornicate without feeling guilty about it and that makes me an atheist."
That's what the sermons say. I know, I was there. :P
My knee-jerk reaction is to keep kids away from religion, but I have to admit I'd rather them be around it and know it exists and understand it-- if they don't have innoculation to it, Campus Crusade or their friends' youth group will get them when they're older. Just for goodness sake don't let them attend Vacation Bible School!0 -
When I was trying to explain to my mom why I don't believe in god anymore, I said, "I just can't believe god is real."
Her response, not her literal response but the essense of it, was, "Well, what's that got to do with it?"
Remember for most people, "atheist" doesn't mean "I just can't believe god is real," it mean "I am in rebellion against god and I want to lie and cheat and steal and fornicate without feeling guilty about it and that makes me an atheist."
That's what the sermons say. I know, I was there. :P
My knee-jerk reaction is to keep kids away from religion, but I have to admit I'd rather them be around it and know it exists and understand it-- if they don't have innoculation to it, Campus Crusade or their friends' youth group will get them when they're older. Just for goodness sake don't let them attend Vacation Bible School!
Sermons? He11, that's what xians tell you on YouTube posts and forums at MFP, for the love of FSM! "You're an atheist because you want to be free to sin." The part they don't seem to get is that I couldn't believe if I wanted to. I just don't see any convincing evidence that a god exists, and saying I do doesn't make it so. In fact, I never did believe, even when I was a "believer." It bothered me that everyone was so sure that this thing exists that I just couldn't see any evidence for! But 17 years of catholic school made me pretty scared to label myself atheist so it took some time. But even when I was a catholic charismatic praying in tongues I didn't believe, even though I said I did. I WANTED to believe.
Now, if someone presented me with evidence (and the bible isn't evidence, nor is personal experience) that a god existed, I absolutely would believe. And I don't contend there is no god. I contend that I do not believe there is one. I could be wrong. As Isaac Asimov said, "I don't have the evidence to prove that God doesn't exist, but I so strongly suspect he doesn't that I don't want to waste my time."0 -
When I was trying to explain to my mom why I don't believe in god anymore, I said, "I just can't believe god is real."
Her response, not her literal response but the essense of it, was, "Well, what's that got to do with it?"
Remember for most people, "atheist" doesn't mean "I just can't believe god is real," it mean "I am in rebellion against god and I want to lie and cheat and steal and fornicate without feeling guilty about it and that makes me an atheist."
That's what the sermons say. I know, I was there. :P
My knee-jerk reaction is to keep kids away from religion, but I have to admit I'd rather them be around it and know it exists and understand it-- if they don't have innoculation to it, Campus Crusade or their friends' youth group will get them when they're older. Just for goodness sake don't let them attend Vacation Bible School!
I agree! I was raised Mormon. When I was attending BYU (a mormon school) I started questioning everything. I never finished college because I just couldn't live there with all those religious hypocrites. I was always told that an atheist is someone with no moral compass, cheaters, sinners, someone who never took responsibility for their actions. Why would I want to be one of those? So I continued for many more years thinking that I was supposed to believe in god and I needed to raise my kids in the church. But through much study and discussion, I finally let go of god and everything to do with him. There was always a feeling that was with me all the time when I was religious. A feeling of inadequacy, foreboding, fear of punishment. When I let go I was free of all that. I felt at peace. I knew that my life had changed for the better. I am so much happier (even when I am sad) in my life. I wish I had done this earlier in my life, though. I was so ingrained and brainwashed in religion that it was so hard to escape. I am so proud of who I am today and what I have accomplished.
So I agree that we should teach our children about everything we can. Don't hold back. Let them make informed decisions in their life and maybe they won't have as much regret as many of us do.0 -
I was always told that an atheist is someone with no moral compass, cheaters, sinners, someone who never took responsibility for their actions. Why would I want to be one of those?
Exactly! I have literally had someone say to me, "Well, I don't beleive in god, but that doesn't make me an ATHEIST."
Possibly one of the most surreal conversations I've ever had. :ohwell:0 -
When I was trying to explain to my mom why I don't believe in god anymore, I said, "I just can't believe god is real."
Her response, not her literal response but the essense of it, was, "Well, what's that got to do with it?"
Remember for most people, "atheist" doesn't mean "I just can't believe god is real," it mean "I am in rebellion against god and I want to lie and cheat and steal and fornicate without feeling guilty about it and that makes me an atheist."
That's what the sermons say. I know, I was there. :P
My knee-jerk reaction is to keep kids away from religion, but I have to admit I'd rather them be around it and know it exists and understand it-- if they don't have innoculation to it, Campus Crusade or their friends' youth group will get them when they're older. Just for goodness sake don't let them attend Vacation Bible School!Sermons? He11, that's what xians tell you on YouTube posts and forums at MFP, for the love of FSM! "You're an atheist because you want to be free to sin." The part they don't seem to get is that I couldn't believe if I wanted to. I just don't see any convincing evidence that a god exists, and saying I do doesn't make it so. In fact, I never did believe, even when I was a "believer." It bothered me that everyone was so sure that this thing exists that I just couldn't see any evidence for! But 17 years of catholic school made me pretty scared to label myself atheist so it took some time. But even when I was a catholic charismatic praying in tongues I didn't believe, even though I said I did. I WANTED to believe.
Now, if someone presented me with evidence (and the bible isn't evidence, nor is personal experience) that a god existed, I absolutely would believe. And I don't contend there is no god. I contend that I do not believe there is one. I could be wrong. As Isaac Asimov said, "I don't have the evidence to prove that God doesn't exist, but I so strongly suspect he doesn't that I don't want to waste my time."
That's so true, I've tried to explain that to people too, but they insist it's a conscious choice we make to believe or not. They don't understand that a person cannot just force themselves to believe something that goes against logic and reason. Christians say "listen with your heart", but I think what they mean is "put faith in your emotions rather than in your intellect", That's why places of worship put so much effort into creating an atmosphere that will cause an emotional response from their flock. These emotions keep people locked into their belief systems because they are told it's the holy spirit filling their hearts, and this is what they consider evidence of their God. They don't see that they are victims of very effective brainwashing techniques used to gain their trust and devotion and to discourage them from doubting or questioning what they are taught to believe is "truth". But they are no more able to make a conscious choice not to believe than we are to make a choice to believe.0 -
Mom: What are you going to do about your son and chuch.
Me: I think I will let him go to catholic school like I did and make up his own mind when he is older.
Mom: What about you?
Me: What about me?
Mom: What are you going to do?
Me: Mom, Im an atheist.
Mom: No you're not.
Me: Ok. (sips protein shake)
Yeah, I've had this same conversation with my mother. She still insists that I'm catholic, no matter what I believe or don't believe, simply for the fact that she had me baptized as a baby. So in her mind, no matter if I'm an atheist, Buddhist or muslim, I'm still a catholic.0 -
Why in the world would you send your son to catholic school if you are atheist?0
