some thoughts on "it's just math"

Sabine_Stroehm

While I was out for my morning run (I burned 400 calories) and again while walking to work (200 calories), I was ruminating on the "it's just math" crowd. Here, and in real life.

Don't get me wrong. It IS math. But there's more to the story than that. And I'm often bemused (yeah, let's go with that) when 20somethings women and MEN tell me (ME! in the throes of menopause) that "it's just math". I always want to ask: You've done this, have you? :bigsmile: You've been through menopause?

I'm not over weight. My husband asks me daily why I'm working so damned hard. My answer: I want to stay healthy.

For the last 10 or so years I've weighed 130 pounds (I'm 5'6"). I've used a fitness calculator similar to MFP for about 10 years (prior to this I slowly crept up to 156 and decided I needed to learn to eat before I did become overweight, so I did). I know how to eat.

As I said, I've been using a fitness calculator. Off and on, when I felt I needed to.
Eight years ago, my doctor convinced me to try Mirena. I'd used hormonal BC before, so I was armed and ready with fitday.com I calculated my calories and workouts before the mirena and in the days after I got it. I kept things steady. And BAM 5lbs. No math there. Hormones, water, stress, cortisol...

I had the mirena removed (for various reasons) and slowly (with the same numbers, the same math) the 5LBS came off.
4 years ago I had an allergic reaction to a black widow bite and had to have a series of steroid shots. No worries, I was gearing up for summer and had been reviewing my calories/workouts. Steroids? No problem! BAM 5LBS. This time it was harder to knock that off. But hey, I'm getting older. Same math, but it was harder going.

These days, I've been using either "Lose it" or MFP for about 3 years. Pretty consistently. I eat well. I eat food, not too much, mostly plants. I do cardio and weights 5 times a week. I’m fit.

Still, as we know, the weight creeps on. The metabolism slows down… I used the tried and true MATH and the pounds wouldn’t budge. I know how to lose 5 LBS! Last fall I asked my doc for bio identical progesterone cream. I was bloated, my fingers felt fat, I had hot flashes. All the usual symptoms. Immediately, the bloating went away. And now, a few months later, the 5LBS are coming off. The math didn’t change. My hormonal situation did.

It is math. It’s also other things. *WE* know this. The (sometimes caring, sometimes snarky) “it’s just math” comments don’t take what we know into consideration.

It’s funny. “It’s math!” but when it’s the last ten pounds, the answer from the "it's just math" crowd seems to change! How come it’s not just “math” any more then, but it’s "just math" when it’s our situation?

It all reminds me of that poster we used to see that sorta picked on teens: Teenagers, Tired Of Being Harassed By Your Parents? Act Now!! Move Out, Get A Job, Pay Your Own Way While You Still Know Everything!

20somethings, female and male, don’t know everything about menopause.

My point: thanks for having this group! :drinker:

Gosser

Well said! :happy:

Sabine_Stroehm

Well said! :happy:

Thanks!

sweatymary

Fantastic blog :-D

I'm compiling a not for profit book of 'menopause stories' and I would love to include this!

Please let me know if you would agree?

Very many thanks
Alison :-D x

Sabine_Stroehm

Fantastic blog :-D

I'm compiling a not for profit book of 'menopause stories' and I would love to include this!

Please let me know if you would agree?

Very many thanks
Alison :-D x

Sure! If you think anyone would want to read it. :-)

katejkelley

Amen, Sister!

Annec0911

Sooo true Sabine!!

I never was much good at math anyway!! :huh:

allie0630

Such a great point!! It's definitely not math...I think of it as chemistry LOL! But really, you need to find what formula works and since our chemistry (women of a certain age) is always changing, it makes it that much harder to figure out the formula!

shadow3829

I feel the same way when someone our age is not losing and the first thing everyone says is you are not eating enough...bump up your calories. The said truth is at my age and current hormonal situation I would gain.

It is not all in the "math" there are to many variables that vary from person to person....age...current weight....hormones...medication. There is no one size fits all.

mkaluzny

Remember even in math, there are different kinds of functions. I like to compare the post-menopause life to an exponential function. Things progress at a great curve the more you age. I would love to be my 27 year old weight, but because of math, I am 15 pounds heavier at age 55. It's okay, math is physics; physics, is science; science is life, and I am enjoying living.

Annec0911

Love the exponential function analogy. Very accurate :laugh:

Sabine_Stroehm

Love the exponential function analogy. Very accurate :laugh:

Me too!:drinker:

fibrogirl

I totally agree,at 50 I´m still trying to lose the extra weight I gained thanks to a Mirena and now having undergone a hysterectomy it´s even worse despite the math!! :blushing:

Mstubbs26

agree totally!!!!!!

Sabine_Stroehm

I totally agree,at 50 I´m still trying to lose the extra weight I gained thanks to a Mirena and now having undergone a hysterectomy it´s even worse despite the math!! :blushing:

Oh so sorry you had Mirena weight gain. Did your doc tell you it wouldn't have any "systemic effects"? Mine did. After 2 weeks I'd gained weight, gone up a bra size, was cranky and, well, it was great birth control because I didn't want sex!
I was so glad when I had it removed (except I had quite a stunning hormone crash).

Sabine_Stroehm

just had this conversation again with someone (in his 20s) and thought of this post. BUMP lol.

lemony57

Yea, it's not just math. I've always eaten well and exercised, could drop 5 pounds by exercising a little more and being a little more careful with the food intake. I am post menopause now and 55, it's a struggle to accept that my body has changed and acquired 10 extra pounds, mostly around the middle.
I continue to do yoga, cardio, weights, and am conscious of what I am putting into my body.
I hope by joining this group I will be able to learn from others who have gone thru this.

In the meantime, I am trying to stay positive and focus on the plusses in my life. Yea, i can do math, this defies logic

lbbcvt

love this thread.........so funny. It is so not just math. It's attitude, hormones, stress,it's having kids and senior parents in your life, its having a job, a home, a marriage/relationship all at the same time

jojo52610

Amen!

MeliciousGibson

I am working out harder and eating better than I've ever eaten in my ENTIRE LIFE!!!!

I do more consistent workouts (I'm a Zumba instructor 4-6 hours/week). My vitals are all in the perfect range. Using conventional "math" I haven't lost a single stinking pound in MONTHS. What's changed - the hormone I'm now on.

The one I was on previously made me pop up about 25 lbs. I changed to a different kind and I dropped 15 lbs. in 2 months! I've since gained back about 5lbs. of that and have seen NO movement at all either in the scale or tape measure in months.

I'm more confused now than ever - because I've been trying "their" math, and I have to tell you - IT ISN'T WORKING FOR ME!

So - I'm just telling myself that I am going to listen to my body. When I'm thirsty I drink. When I'm hungry I eat. As long as I keep the eating in moderation and healthy foods I should be good.

After all, I'm in menopause - do I really need to look "perfect" or do I want to be "healthy"?

katejkelley

Amen, Sister!

annarouni

Math, shmath. It drives me nuts when slim 20-somethings eat rubbish and still don't gain. And I don't see much effort at exercise from them either. Are they really all that healthy? Probably not. Slim does not necessarily equal healthy. The unfairness of two different outcomes really kicks when the "it's just math" crops up.

Okay one plus one is indeed two. But in chemistry heat and other pressures might cause the outcome to be a bit different. Yes, we are different. So there's no need to feel that we've failed when the math doesn't work in our case. Instead of a pure mathematical formula, maybe we are flasks gurgling and bubbling over a bunsen burner; research still in progress. Just wait. One of these days, and VOILA, we are going to be the breakthrough that people oooh and ahhhh over! :bigsmile:

Well maybe not. But comparing ourselves to those not in our circumstances is not worthwhile. It doesn't help us to succeed. And it doesn't stop younger ones from joining our group when their time comes. Let's keep doing what we can and feel good about ourselves for ourselves, not for others.

Debutante55

You have eloquently captured what SO many of us know to be the absolute truth -- MATH be DAMNED!!!

I have been tracking every morsel on MFP for about two months and have lost five lbs, which is fine. However, what galls me is that the nasty old waist measurement has not changed one bit! If I were 20 it'd be a completely different story but I'm not. At 57 there are certainly additional factors at work and pieces of the puzzle that seem to be highly variable from one woman to another. I think it's often a matter of trying different approaches – bioidentical hormone replacement, metabolism-activating exercise, calorie cutting (but not too severely), stress reduction, perhaps even some dietary supplements – to see what works for your particular set of circumstances. It's incredibly frustrating and disheartening at times but it's nice to know there is a "sisterhood" out there that really understands... it's NOT just math! Thank you for your thoughtful post.

Sabine_Stroehm

Thanks for validating my reality ladies! You guys are my inspiration.

megleo818

Thank you, Sabine!

I just faced the seemingly never-changing scale again this morning and harkened back to the days when I lived in NYC as a 20-something who would go out on the weekends and close the bars, grab a slice or a falafel at 4:00, sleep a couple of hours, then go to the corner diner for pancakes and eggs -- and still had a seemingly never-changing scale. Was I fit and healthy then? -- I smoked cigarettes in those days, too, for crying out loud!! -- No, I wasn't fit, I was just young. And where, exactly, was this mythical math in 1988??

Fast forward 25 years and now I track what I eat, I exercise hard every day, I take care of my family (right, that's both the elderly father and the 'tween daughters), and generally pay attention. Would I trade this life for the one I lived back then? HELL no! Yeah I have a flabby *kitten* and saggy knees. What of it? Yeah I'm carrying 15 extra pounds. Oh well. There's real muscle under that layer, people. I am strong!

You know what? My scale may well never move again. I may well be sitting here, strategizing for my 1,200-calorie day when I'm 60. I will likely die hating math just as much as I did when I was 12. But I love my life and I'm proud of my body.

Bottom line: It's all good.

Have a fantastic weekend, ladies!

cnmince

Thanks, everybody! This string is exactly what I was hoping for when I joined this group on MFP. Menopause changes the weight-loss equation for many (most?) of us and I think it's great if we can share what works/doesn't work.

Sabine_Stroehm

Thanks, everybody! This string is exactly what I was hoping for when I joined this group on MFP. Menopause changes the weight-loss equation for many (most?) of us and I think it's great if we can share what works/doesn't work.

Great!

Sabine_Stroehm

Today on the forms: shirtless man after shirtless man posting about calories in and calories out. Oh, and one 31 year old woman saying hormones aren't what causes menopausal weight gain. :happy: :flowerforyou:

Merithyn

Today on the forms: shirtless man after shirtless man posting about calories in and calories out. Oh, and one 31 year old woman saying hormones aren't what causes menopausal weight gain. :happy: :flowerforyou:

I always giggle when I read someone who's never been through menopause talk about it as if they know. Really? It's like my 18-year-old son telling me how college works, or my 13-year-old daughter explaining to me about teenaged girls. They may have some idea, but until they're knee-deep in it and covered in hormonal mud, it's all just theoretical for them. The rest of us, on the other hand, have mucked through well enough to recognize that the answers are never that simple.

Leave them to their illusions. The reality will be hard enough when they go through it; no need to pop the balloon too soon. :drinker:

TinaBaily

I'm a very logical person, and math mostly makes sense to me. However, as a woman who hasn't yet quite hit menopause, but who is sneaking up on it very stealthily, I know that MATH won't explain the intstantaneous overnight 3 to 5lb weight gain when "aunt flo" comes a-visiting, and that same drop 3 days later when I toss her baggage to the curb and my family is willing to be around me again. (I kid about the emotional stuff, but it sure feels that way at times.) It's nost likely hormones. Math can't explain those, as the original poster here so beautifully put it. :happy:

Nancy_AZ60

I think it is called "New" Math. Calories- excercise *(-hormones) / (age +stress ) = +/- 1 pound .

One thing we can count on is that, those kids in their 20 and 30 don't know what they don't know, They will be 50+ someday (God willing) and still be taking about us, saying those 80 year olds in my dance class are kicking my butt.