Losing hope..
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:laugh:
Same. I'm really unexcited about it all.I pretty much lost hope a long time ago. I've recently met a bunch of different women, some I met online, one I met at a bar, and one was sort of a fix up. They were all really cool and attractive, I just don't really have feelings for any of them. I think I'm broken. And the ones that I actually do like once in a blue moon just aren't into me. Oh well, I'm still having fun trying.
I have lost my mojo
Same.
I'm more or less waiting to be "swept off" my feet but, really, I think it doesn't happen...0 -
[:laugh:
Same.
I'm more or less waiting to be "swept off" my feet but, really, I think it doesn't happen...
I understand that completely because I'm teetering on that edge of not really caring or trying any longer (not that I was putting much effort in anyway). However, I know the FedEx guy isn't just going to show up at my front door and say here's the man of your dreams (unless I order one off of one of THOSE websites, ha!) so I'm starting to realize that things won't change unless my attitude does...but am I willing to? Not sure yet...so for now, MFP is a great distraction full of eye candy so I get to pretend shop from home, hahaha!!!0 -
Lost my mojo is a good way of explaining it, for me. Realized that the last few attempts have resulted in superficial relationships due to *me* focusing primarily on sex. (My drive is through the roof lately.)
It's an esteem issue; Not that I don't think I'm awesome... I just have lost any confidence that a guy could think I am. I know that I have an amazing capacity to love someone, but I don't think I believe that I could be loved. It's always been a one way street.
Sooo... I just spent $100 on toys and have decided that I need to be working on myself for a while. I'm not getting any younger, and I really need to tackle this mental block that's existed for far too long. So: Officially off the market, walking away from the game. Yep, I'm a quitter.0 -
Honestly, I just have faith in the concept that my life will turn out the way it was intended to turn out. That's not to say that I don't take credit/blame for my choices and the consequences thereof. I have free will. But I do believe in a grand scheme, so to speak.
^This. It can be incredibly tough to see exes and friends get married and be stupidly happy, but I have faith that the right person is out there for me. I'm in no rush since I'm still figuring out who I am and what I want. Part of it for me is I don't want a relationship to say I'm in a relationship. I want a partner, someone who gives when I take and takes when I give.0 -
I am starting to lose faith that there is someone for everyone. The more of my exs I see get married the more hopeless I become!
What keeps you going when you realize all the people you used to be with are getting married and you are still single?
Hope you are having a better day today. As an ex-pastor's-wife I can tell you that most people are UN happily married, but go through great lengths in public to make it look like all is great.
Also, letting go of the idea that "there's someone for everyone" has actually HELPED me accept being single. Not to say I don't eventually hope I'll find someone, but accepting that there might NOT be anyone out there who is perfect for me helps me not to feel bad about myself for not having anyone. I observe a great many more older single women than there are decent single men available for a relationship. So as I age, if I cling to that I would feel really bad about myself. But I don't. I have a good job, make a good home for my son, am a positive force in my community and (even without a permanent man at my side) am happy.
But I remember the days when I felt like everyone was getting engaged/married and something was wrong with me if I didn't have a man. That's how I ended up marrying my ex.
:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:0 -
[:laugh:
Same.
I'm more or less waiting to be "swept off" my feet but, really, I think it doesn't happen...
I understand that completely because I'm teetering on that edge of not really caring or trying any longer (not that I was putting much effort in anyway). However, I know the FedEx guy isn't just going to show up at my front door and say here's the man of your dreams (unless I order one off of one of THOSE websites, ha!) so I'm starting to realize that things won't change unless my attitude does...but am I willing to? Not sure yet...so for now, MFP is a great distraction full of eye candy so I get to pretend shop from home, hahaha!!!
*gasp* What if the FedEx guy is the one?! I'm going to start ordering sh!ttons of packages from Amazon now..0 -
[:laugh:
Same.
I'm more or less waiting to be "swept off" my feet but, really, I think it doesn't happen...
I understand that completely because I'm teetering on that edge of not really caring or trying any longer (not that I was putting much effort in anyway). However, I know the FedEx guy isn't just going to show up at my front door and say here's the man of your dreams (unless I order one off of one of THOSE websites, ha!) so I'm starting to realize that things won't change unless my attitude does...but am I willing to? Not sure yet...so for now, MFP is a great distraction full of eye candy so I get to pretend shop from home, hahaha!!!
*gasp* What if the FedEx guy is the one?! I'm going to start ordering sh!ttons of packages from Amazon now..
Yeah, my friends all agree that may be the best solution. You can accomplish Shoe AND Man shopping at once
Of course, my more bitter friends are worried that the delivery guy will drop off something rather trollish, so they haven't ordered yet, haha! 0 -
I think today I realized I don't have to settle. Maybe I will try the movie by myself thing!! I work a lot coming up but I will keep you posted!0
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I think today I realized I don't have to settle. Maybe I will try the movie by myself thing!! I work a lot coming up but I will keep you posted!
Sounds like a good call. And trust me, the first time at the movies by yourself will feel weird, but you'll actually enjoy it. I just started with a non-prime time (not Fri/ Sat evening) to feel comfortable. Good Luck!0 -
I've never seen a movie by myself before. To me it's weird. I have a friend who does it all the time. I still think it's weird.
However, I did try dining at a restaurant by myself once. Again, weird.
Then again, I'm the type to sit in the coffee shop late hours reading by myself. Surprisingly, not weird at all!0 -
I think today I realized I don't have to settle. Maybe I will try the movie by myself thing!! I work a lot coming up but I will keep you posted!
Looks to me like you've taken your first big step in a new and hopeful direction
Hope the sunshine's brighter! 0 -
I pretty much lost hope a long time ago. I've recently met a bunch of different women, some I met online, one I met at a bar, and one was sort of a fix up. They were all really cool and attractive, I just don't really have feelings for any of them. I think I'm broken. And the ones that I actually do like once in a blue moon just aren't into me. Oh well, I'm still having fun trying.
Same. I'm really unexcited about it all.
I have lost my mojo
I haven't given up. To me it's just being insecure and lacking confidence. I am not happy with myself physically. What was that saying, you have to love yourself before you can love someone else?I've never seen a movie by myself before. To me it's weird. I have a friend who does it all the time. I still think it's weird.
However, I did try dining at a restaurant by myself once. Again, weird.
Then again, I'm the type to sit in the coffee shop late hours reading by myself. Surprisingly, not weird at all!
I have had a few friends go with me in the past. However with my work sechdule it is very tricky. Working nights plus the weekends. I only have time to go at night on Mon/Tues. All of my friends are working when I am off of working during my weekend so they can't really go out. I often go alone because of this. Doesn't bug me at all.0 -
I've stopped worrying about it. I figure I will find someone eventually, but until then, I'm just going to enjoy living my life. A boyfriend is not the be all end all of life. Just chill, brah. It's all good. 0
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Anytime I think Im losing hope, I realise Im caring too much about it. So I quit and be awesome instead.0
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It's obviously you. You are too fit. Who wants to be with a woman that works, is a triathlete, and obviously cares about herself? I mean, all us guys want weak women who we can use as a punching bag.0
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*gasp* What if the FedEx guy is the one?! I'm going to start ordering sh!ttons of packages from Amazon now..
My Fed Ex guy is freaking HOT ... whew! :smokin:0 -
I have never gone out to a movie by myself.. It is scary! lol
It's easy... and you always get to go to the movie you want to see!
Amen to that - and you dont have to put up with someone talking in your ear through the movie lol0 -
I realized the other day that I'm going to be single for a long time. At the same moment I also realized I'm totally okay with that. The idea of dating is exhausting. I really prefer for things to just happen naturally. If I would rather hang out at home with my cats than spend time with you? Not gonna work...0
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It's obviously you. You are too fit. Who wants to be with a woman that works, is a triathlete, and obviously cares about herself? I mean, all us guys want weak women who we can use as a punching bag.
Hahahaha! It all makes sense now! Thank you! 0 -
Don't know about the FedEx guy, the only one I deal with is married... but the Jimmy John's delivery guy is cute!0
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What HAS kept me going is remembering that I can have a fulfilling, adventurous life even if I'm single, so I've always pushed myself to get comfortable with being alone. I started with the easy things like going to the movies, then dinner, then on vacation, etc... by myself. I've gotten to see the world and not everyone can say that, particularly when they settle down and start a family.
I'd also say I've focused on my career and have done well for myself. I'm comfortable enough to get to go on those vacations and buy what I want within reason.
However, I will admit that lately that hasn't seemed like enough. Lately I find myself thinking that career success just isn't as important. My ideals about the idea of working vs staying home to raise a family suddenly seem different yet because I don't have that option really, it leaves me feeling more down about it...
Exactly what I was thinking. We will find someone when the time is right until then just enjoy the adventures.:drinker:0 -
Had a date for next Friday but she canceled,turns out there is another guy she is more interested in that was upset.
Oh well,refuse to let it undo me in any way and really do wish them well.
Now at a conundrum because I sense I am too matter of fact and blunt to really be liked but must be somehow carrying myself differently because in a friendly way have noticed many more ladies smiling and/or saying hi in passing in stores etc.
Sometimes wish life was like one of my repair manuals where you do as it says and in the end everything works...it is not though.0 -
Sometimes wish life was like one of my repair manuals where you do as it says and in the end everything works...it is not though.
If life was like a repair manual it would be no fun. There would be no guess work.
When these ladies say Hi in the stores... what do you do? Do you say hi back and keep walking? If I say hi to a guy in a store and I'm single and he's not a "pal" that I already know it's because -I.WANT.HIM.TO.NOTICE.ME. Stop - chat get number... done deal. You're a super nice guy with a lot to offer someone. She's out there.....0 -
Sometimes wish life was like one of my repair manuals where you do as it says and in the end everything works...it is not though.
If life was like a repair manual it would be no fun. There would be no guess work.
When these ladies say Hi in the stores... what do you do? Do you say hi back and keep walking? If I say hi to a guy in a store and I'm single and he's not a "pal" that I already know it's because -I.WANT.HIM.TO.NOTICE.ME. Stop - chat get number... done deal. You're a super nice guy with a lot to offer someone. She's out there.....
It has been in passing,one entering the other leaving,not a conversation moment really.0 -
Sometimes wish life was like one of my repair manuals where you do as it says and in the end everything works...it is not though.
If life was like a repair manual it would be no fun. There would be no guess work.
When these ladies say Hi in the stores... what do you do? Do you say hi back and keep walking? If I say hi to a guy in a store and I'm single and he's not a "pal" that I already know it's because -I.WANT.HIM.TO.NOTICE.ME. Stop - chat get number... done deal. You're a super nice guy with a lot to offer someone. She's out there.....
It has been in passing,one entering the other leaving,not a conversation moment really.
Oh crud.. I forgot something and need to go back into the store -- #1.
Oh crud... I left something in my car #2.
You MAKE your own opportunities. :flowerforyou:0 -
Had a date for next Friday but she canceled,turns out there is another guy she is more interested in that was upset.
Oh well,refuse to let it undo me in any way and really do wish them well.
Now at a conundrum because I sense I am too matter of fact and blunt to really be liked but must be somehow carrying myself differently because in a friendly way have noticed many more ladies smiling and/or saying hi in passing in stores etc.
Sometimes wish life was like one of my repair manuals where you do as it says and in the end everything works...it is not though.
How on earth is the guy who seems to have all the answers on this site not swimming in a sea of adoring women? I don't get it??
Oh wait. He IS! All these "ladies are smiling and/or saying hi passing in stores etc" each one an opportunity, my friend! Like Shellee said 0
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