Excuses, excuses

Roadie2000

Has anyone ever gotten any good (or good BS) excuses why someone can't make it to a date, or something else? Or have you even given someone else an excuse just to get out of a date?

I got a good one last night. She said her best friend's brother fell off a roof and she had to go with them to the hospital. Now I have no reason not to believer her, and I don't think anyone would make up a story like that, but in my many years of dating I've had this happen a few too many times. I mean, I don't really I care either way, I have nothing emotionally invested, just thought it would be fun to talk about.

Meghan0116

I had a guy tell me that he couldn't make a Sunday night date because he had to apply for jobs. LOL I think he realized that all his I miss you texts and talking about me being his future girlfriend before our first date freaked me out.

jenbit

LOL I had one guy cancel a date on me 15 min before cause he was out getting his taxes done... At 8 oclock at night on a Sunday in November lol

shammxo

I don't think I have any good stories about what a guy has said to me. Although I'm sure karma has something wonderful in store for me.

But I, admittedly have had some stupid ones. (I'm brutally honest now). I think the best of the worst was something about not being sure whether or not I was a lesbian and needing time to mull it over. Or, "my cat needs me. sorry..."

NCTravellingGirl

I'll admit it because a lot of women do it... I once used "that time of the month" as an excuse, haha.... we'd been hanging out for a while and I knew he just was expecting sex that night. I also knew I needed to slow things down, so I used that excuse so he wouldn't want to meet up since he couldn't get what he wanted...

Otherwise, that same guy once cancelled his birthday plans with me because his buddy"Ryan in Glendale" had made plans....Ryan's real name was Susanna (the original girlfriend I didn't know about")... AWESOME!

shammxo

I'll admit it because a lot of women do it... I once used "that time of the month" as an excuse, haha.... we'd been hanging out for a while and I knew he just was expecting sex that night. I also knew I needed to slow things down, so I used that excuse so he wouldn't want to meet up since he couldn't get what he wanted...

Otherwise, that same guy once cancelled his birthday plans with me because his buddy"Ryan in Glendale" had made plans....Ryan's real name was Susanna (the original girlfriend I didn't know about")... AWESOME!

The dude had specifics... haha. I remember reading once that if someone is really detail oriented when telling you something like this, they're probably lying.

NNAhuja

How about he wrecked his car and couldn't drive us to get sushi.

NNAhuja

Otherwise, that same guy once cancelled his birthday plans with me because his buddy"Ryan in Glendale" had made plans....Ryan's real name was Susanna (the original girlfriend I didn't know about")... AWESOME!

Ooooo wow!:noway:

NCTravellingGirl

I got a good one last night. She said her best friend's brother fell off a roof and she had to go with them to the hospital. Now I have no reason not to believer her,...

At first when I read this, it seemed valid, but admittedly thinking about it... eh, it seems to stretch just a little too far unless she's like 20 or something. Most of us don't live with and spend THAT much time with our BFFs, so under normal circumstances, I can't imagine going to the hospital with her for her brother.

Kinda like shammxo said, a little too detailed and specific to sound real whether it is or not . But who says you have to decide?! Besides, as many dates as it seems you've been on lately... move on to the next one

AnnaPixie

I've only ever had one guy bail. He was on his way round to me for our second date and he got news that his uncle died! He said he had to go be with his Mum. Fair enough I thought...........

I never heard from him again! :laugh:

slay0r

I have given some awful, awful excuses that I wouldn't even put on here. To be fair I've never done it like 15 mins before it's usually like a day or so in advance.

One or two I feel REALLY bad about even now, one I did make it up to because I felt that bad about it, just not as a date.

As for excuses, you can't get past the womans "headache"

I've had a couple though, one said she had slipped on the floor and hurt her arm so she couldn't do any of her makeup and hair and said she looked like a troll without it (attractive..) Another one told me she had a last minute business meeting and she really didn't want to go and the things we could have done instead blahblah, I went out with friends instead and bumped into her hammered with a bunch of girls.. was a little bit awkward til I burst out laughing and gave her a high 5 for effort, end of the day it's a date if they don't want to see you it's better they tell you before you've spent the evening/date with them!

slay0r

I've only ever had one guy bail. He was on his way round to me for our second date and he got news that his uncle died! He said he had to go be with his Mum. Fair enough I thought...........

I never heard from him again! :laugh:

Oh yeah I had the goddaughter had kidney problems so had to go, text me tomorrow I really want to go out..text her to see how the goddaughter was, got a she's fine thanks, ignored the stuff about another date and didn't ever text me back..fair enough :x

Not a date but 2 weeks ago I was at a festival, I lost a bet so had to go raving in a suit so I looked awesome but I got really muddy, I was absolutely RUINED when I was on my way home and some girl started chatting to me on the metro, got along really well, she's giving me compliments all over the place and playing with her hair and biting her lips etc and asks me for my number..waits 4 days to text me and gives 1 word replies so I stopped, bumped into her today and she's like HEEEEY, why haven't you been texting me?! So I said I'd lost her number since I'd got a new phone and she hadn't replied last time she was like "ohh I'm sorry I've been really busy but I'll text you now so you've got my number" Didn't text me.. whyyy would you bother?!

Roadie2000

I got a good one last night. She said her best friend's brother fell off a roof and she had to go with them to the hospital. Now I have no reason not to believer her,...

At first when I read this, it seemed valid, but admittedly thinking about it... eh, it seems to stretch just a little too far unless she's like 20 or something. Most of us don't live with and spend THAT much time with our BFFs, so under normal circumstances, I can't imagine going to the hospital with her for her brother.

Kinda like shammxo said, a little too detailed and specific to sound real whether it is or not . But who says you have to decide?! Besides, as many dates as it seems you've been on lately... move on to the next one

Well, apparently her BFF lives right across the street, and they live only about 3 blocks from me (there's actually a little bit more to the story).

There is one thing I will ask of the girls of the single peeps though, since you all seem to have experience doing this (lol). When this happens I never bother to contact the girl again and just move on to the next one. I figure I asked her out, she cancelled, if she really wants to hang out she can contact me and suggest a date. They rarely do. I assume they're just not interested. But sometimes I hear that girls like to be pursued, do they really expect us to continue to make an effort after they blow us off?

shammxo

I got a good one last night. She said her best friend's brother fell off a roof and she had to go with them to the hospital. Now I have no reason not to believer her,...

At first when I read this, it seemed valid, but admittedly thinking about it... eh, it seems to stretch just a little too far unless she's like 20 or something. Most of us don't live with and spend THAT much time with our BFFs, so under normal circumstances, I can't imagine going to the hospital with her for her brother.

Kinda like shammxo said, a little too detailed and specific to sound real whether it is or not . But who says you have to decide?! Besides, as many dates as it seems you've been on lately... move on to the next one

Well, apparently her BFF lives right across the street, and they live only about 3 blocks from me (there's actually a little bit more to the story).

There is one thing I will ask of the girls of the single peeps though, since you all seem to have experience doing this (lol). When this happens I never bother to contact the girl again and just move on to the next one. I figure I asked her out, she cancelled, if she really wants to hang out she can contact me and suggest a date. They rarely do. I assume they're just not interested. But sometimes I hear that girls like to be pursued, do they really expect us to continue to make an effort after they blow us off?

"And just move on to the next one" Love it.

If she is interested, then she will contact you. You don't blow off a guy that you're "really into". And even if she is a girl that likes to be pursued, chances are that it's going to end up being more trouble than it's worth.

slay0r

I got a good one last night. She said her best friend's brother fell off a roof and she had to go with them to the hospital. Now I have no reason not to believer her,...

At first when I read this, it seemed valid, but admittedly thinking about it... eh, it seems to stretch just a little too far unless she's like 20 or something. Most of us don't live with and spend THAT much time with our BFFs, so under normal circumstances, I can't imagine going to the hospital with her for her brother.

Kinda like shammxo said, a little too detailed and specific to sound real whether it is or not . But who says you have to decide?! Besides, as many dates as it seems you've been on lately... move on to the next one

Well, apparently her BFF lives right across the street, and they live only about 3 blocks from me (there's actually a little bit more to the story).

There is one thing I will ask of the girls of the single peeps though, since you all seem to have experience doing this (lol). When this happens I never bother to contact the girl again and just move on to the next one. I figure I asked her out, she cancelled, if she really wants to hang out she can contact me and suggest a date. They rarely do. I assume they're just not interested. But sometimes I hear that girls like to be pursued, do they really expect us to continue to make an effort after they blow us off?

Interesting.. would like to see a response to that!

Most of the time I'd never contact again unless it was someone's health then I'd just ask if they were ok out of courtesy more than anything. My principle is the same as yours.

Katefab26

Do they really expect us to continue to make an effort after they blow us off?

No. At least I don't -- I would be much more likely to get annoyed that you can't take a hint :laugh:

I don't give excuses anymore; I just don't accept dates with people I'm not interested in. Most of the ones I've given in the past are just silly, like my mom needs my help, or my brother just got into town and I never see him (that was when he and I both lived at home :embarassed: )

I've had guys cancel on me because they ask me if I am talking to anyone else (before we've even met!!!). I figure if they're asking, they want to know, so I tell them, and then they get mad at me and cancel because they don't want to be part of a "fan club". I think it's ridiculous. Obviously they're talking to other people as well...

AnnaPixie

I assume they're just not interested. But sometimes I hear that girls like to be pursued, do they really expect us to continue to make an effort after they blow us off?

If its BS, then hell no!! Don't bother!

If it's a genuine excuse, then I'd text and ask 'how was your BFF brother'?

I know at this point you dont know if it's genuine or not, so personally, I'd just send that one text and see if you get a response......

Even I texted that guy and asked him how his Mum was.............its the polite thing to do!!

I would be peeved with a guy if I gave an excuse like that and it was genuine, but he didnt even ask me how it turned out. But then again, I would text you after and tell you things were ok, when shall we reschedule?

You call...........but I always tend to go the 'nothing to lose' route......:flowerforyou:

ItsCasey

First, if I really want to go out with a guy, I'm going to do everything within my power to avoid canceling the first date. If an emergency comes up, like my mom is rushed to the hospital, okay, the date is going to have to wait. But I hear stories all the time about someone canceling a date because of really lame reasons, like "I was busy all day, and I'm really tired," or "I have to be at work early tomorrow." That's all BS to me, and I guess it's because when I make a date with someone, that is my priority on that particular day. I will move things around in my schedule, and I will sacrifice an hour or two of sleep to go on a date with someone I really like.

Secondly, if a real emergency interferes with a date and I have to cancel, if I really like him, I am going to apologize profusely and try to reschedule.

I do think people, especially women, are frequently guilty of overanalyzing people's words and actions, but when I feel in my gut like someone is blowing me off, I ask myself "Would you do this to someone you really like?" If the answer is no, I write them off and move on.

Roadie2000

"And just move on to the next one" Love it.

If she is interested, then she will contact you. You don't blow off a guy that you're "really into". And even if she is a girl that likes to be pursued, chances are that it's going to end up being more trouble than it's worth.

Well we've never actually met, it was an online thing, so I wouldn't expect her to be "really into" me yet anyway. It's really more of a curiosity thing for me. And it just seems odd to me, I've never canceled on a first date. I figure what's the point of online dating if you're just going to waste time emailing someone just to cancel a date and never make any effort to meet them?

DrewMaxwell

What I really don't appreciate or like is when you make a date, and a day or so (or even a few hours) prior to the date you get a text saying they can't make it for some reason and they suggest rescheduling for another date and of course when that new date approaches you get similar behavior - getting strung along SUCKS!

NCTravellingGirl

If that were to happen to me, I'd reach back out to him myself since I was the one to cancel. You already pursued...you already took the initiative to get things moving!! I do think women love to be pursued, but chasing is another matter, haha...

That said, I'm guessing you're asking the question because you were really interested and would like to reach out but don't want to be that weird guy who doesn't go away in case she really was blowing you off. If that's true... DO IT! No sense sitting here wondering even if there are tons of other women waiting in the wings for your attention online

jenbit

"And just move on to the next one" Love it.

If she is interested, then she will contact you. You don't blow off a guy that you're "really into". And even if she is a girl that likes to be pursued, chances are that it's going to end up being more trouble than it's worth.

Well we've never actually met, it was an online thing, so I wouldn't expect her to be "really into" me yet anyway. It's really more of a curiosity thing for me. And it just seems odd to me, I've never canceled on a first date. I figure what's the point of online dating if you're just going to waste time emailing someone just to cancel a date and never make any effort to meet them?

I have little ones so there has been the occasional emergency where I've had to cancel last minute. But if I'm interested in the guy I always make sure to text him the next day. Plus I try to reschedule right away . Say if I had to cancel for tuesday night I would try to set something up for Thursday...If you are the one cancelling you need to make an effort to set something else up

pa_jorg

There is one thing I will ask of the girls of the single peeps though, since you all seem to have experience doing this (lol). When this happens I never bother to contact the girl again and just move on to the next one. I figure I asked her out, she cancelled, if she really wants to hang out she can contact me and suggest a date. They rarely do. I assume they're just not interested. But sometimes I hear that girls like to be pursued, do they really expect us to continue to make an effort after they blow us off?

No need to follow up. Regardless of how crazy the excuse may seem, if it was legit, she would at least offer another day or time to meet. If that doesn't happen then just move on. Anyone who would make an excuse and then expect you to continue to pursue them would probably end up being too needy anyway.

That said, I'm guessing you're asking the question because you were really interested and would like to reach out but don't want to be that weird guy who doesn't go away in case she really was blowing you off. If that's true... DO IT! No sense sitting here wondering even if there are tons of other women waiting in the wings for your attention online wink

I agree with this too... If it will really bother you just wondering if something could have happened then at least email or text her one more time so you know for sure. Regretting a missed opportunity is the worst, so at least you'll know.

Moe4572

I assume they're just not interested. But sometimes I hear that girls like to be pursued, do they really expect us to continue to make an effort after they blow us off?

If its BS, then hell no!! Don't bother!

If it's a genuine excuse, then I'd text and ask 'how was your BFF brother'?

I know at this point you dont know if it's genuine or not, so personally, I'd just send that one text and see if you get a response......

Even I texted that guy and asked him how his Mum was.............its the polite thing to do!!

I would be peeved with a guy if I gave an excuse like that and it was genuine, but he didnt even ask me how it turned out. But then again, I would text you after and tell you things were ok, when shall we reschedule?

You call...........but I always tend to go the 'nothing to lose' route......:flowerforyou:

I agree with Anna 100% on this. Even if it sounds like BS you never know for sure......so, nothing to lose......

And, for the record, if my BFF's brother fell off a roof, I would not think it strange to go the hospital with them

Daisy_Cutter

There is one thing I will ask of the girls of the single peeps though, since you all seem to have experience doing this (lol). When this happens I never bother to contact the girl again and just move on to the next one. I figure I asked her out, she cancelled, if she really wants to hang out she can contact me and suggest a date. They rarely do. I assume they're just not interested. But sometimes I hear that girls like to be pursued, do they really expect us to continue to make an effort after they blow us off?

OK -- this is what I do. If I'm the one cancelling and I really did have a valid excuse and was bummed I couldn't go out with the guy, I'd initiate contact with him for the follow up. I would not expect him to follow up with me at all.

Of course if you have any suspicion it's a blow-off .... just move on.

Being blown off and/or strung along is just nonsense. People just need to communicate truthfully! Gah!

BelMckenzie

Well, apparently her BFF lives right across the street, and they live only about 3 blocks from me (there's actually a little bit more to the story).

There is one thing I will ask of the girls of the single peeps though, since you all seem to have experience doing this (lol). When this happens I never bother to contact the girl again and just move on to the next one. I figure I asked her out, she cancelled, if she really wants to hang out she can contact me and suggest a date. They rarely do. I assume they're just not interested. But sometimes I hear that girls like to be pursued, do they really expect us to continue to make an effort after they blow us off?

I would move on. If she didn't mention rescheduling the date she is probably not interested. I think the ball is in her court. Plus if the story was true and she was interested in meeting you, then she would make it happen.

When I have given a lame excuse since I wasn't feeling that date, I still rescheduled even though I know I didn't care to go out with that guy but since I had agreed to the date in the first place I felt bad completely blowing him off. I have gotten better that I just don't go on those kind of dates where I feel the need to give lame excuses.

Moe4572

"Good excuse" story.......I had been talking to a guy for a while, then started seeing someone, so stopped contact. Then when I broke off the relationship, I contacted him again just to see how he was, etc. Well, we started texting ALOT and decided to finally meet (we had not met before). We met on a Friday and he wanted to make dinner for me at his place on Sat....he texted me that evening and the next morning- he had to work-until about 2--had not given his address yet-said he would call me when he got home and we would set up time and he would give his address, etc. Never heard anything--UNTIL about a month later, got a text saying it was him and he was looking for me? Then explained he was in a bad accident on his way home that day, in the hospital, had surgery on shoulder, and lost phone and Ipad so had no way of contacting me, until he realized my # would be on phone bill. So, I believed him, we got together a couple times, and then ....when he was supposed to gethis new car, start work again, etc. he fell of the the face of the earth again.....No idea if accident was real or not--though he was with out a car, and he did show me his nasty shoulder--was bent funny.

Roadie2000

Right on, I'm not any more interested in her than I have been of any other woman I've met on a dating site. She was cute, we had some stuff in common, and she only lived a few blocks from me so we were gonna walk our dogs together. Half hour tops, just to see if there's any chemistry. No biggie, if I get bored next week maybe I'll text her, but probably not.

shammxo

Right on, I'm not any more interested in her than I have been of any other woman I've met on a dating site. She was cute, we had some stuff in common, and she only lived a few blocks from me so we were gonna walk our dogs together. Half hour tops, just to see if there's any chemistry. No biggie, if I get bored next week maybe I'll text her, but probably not.

Amen, brother.

BelMckenzie

Right on, I'm not any more interested in her than I have been of any other woman I've met on a dating site. She was cute, we had some stuff in common, and she only lived a few blocks from me so we were gonna walk our dogs together. Half hour tops, just to see if there's any chemistry. No biggie, if I get bored next week maybe I'll text her, but probably not.

Good follow up plan and that is a very cute date idea!!

_SpeshK_

I don't think I have any good stories about what a guy has said to me. Although I'm sure karma has something wonderful in store for me.

But I, admittedly have had some stupid ones. (I'm brutally honest now). I think the best of the worst was something about not being sure whether or not I was a lesbian and needing time to mull it over. Or, "my cat needs me. sorry..."

LOLLLL!!! Karma's comin' for you!