how do you win?
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Youre supposed to dance with more than one person. If you dance with the same person all night, they assume its your boyfriend.0
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Sometimes in public places, I look at people and try to smile - the majority of people walk with their head down. It is so interesting. Maybe 1 out of 10 people will look at you. Try it sometime!
hmmm.... Where do you live?
Maybe it's a cultural thing, but I would say more than half of the people here look at you and smile, some even speak. Maybe not in the grocery store always, but yeah... there, too, sometimes... Heck, we even wave at you if you're driving down the road. Especially out here in the country.
That is good!
I live in the Midwest which is very weird. Back where I went to school, everyone was friendly and would wave to people driving but in the bigger cities not so much.
You don't happen to live in metro Detroit, do you? That sounds like people around here. I think I'd fit in a lot better down south in Darla's neighborhood.0 -
Did you dance with him?
If it was me, and I saw a cute guy, and he wanted to dance with me, girl, I'd get my boogie on!!!!
Yes I did, and it was so much fun but the whole time I was thinking, "does this make a good impression on a guy?"
Wtf? You know, life is for the living. Making a few mistakes now and then just means you're out there doing your best, giving it a shot. You're waaaaaay over thinking this. In fact, I'm starting to think writing about your encounters here (or, rather, un-encounters) has become a fetish of some sorts for you. Meet guy. Agonize. Do nothing. Post. Repeat.
Just like some dieters have cheat days, I think you need a cheat day, too. But where you dress up uber sexy, head to the nearest meat market bar, and just get down to bizness, if you know what I mean. The next day, pretend it didn't happen.
Trust me. Just try it for a few weeks and report back. Good luck.
--P0 -
but if I did (dance with him), it makes me seem easy like I'll dance with any random guy I meet at the bar, and that I might not be great dating material.
I dont understand. Is "dance with" a euphemism for bang?
LOL!0 -
Sometimes in public places, I look at people and try to smile - the majority of people walk with their head down. It is so interesting. Maybe 1 out of 10 people will look at you. Try it sometime!
hmmm.... Where do you live?
Maybe it's a cultural thing, but I would say more than half of the people here look at you and smile, some even speak. Maybe not in the grocery store always, but yeah... there, too, sometimes... Heck, we even wave at you if you're driving down the road. Especially out here in the country.
That is good!
I live in the Midwest which is very weird. Back where I went to school, everyone was friendly and would wave to people driving but in the bigger cities not so much.
I live in the Midwest too and never worried about the impression I was giving off by dancing with someone. Taking them home after said dance, maybe, but just a dance? No way. It's fun. Everyone does it. What's there to think bad about?0 -
Wait. I'm confused. Is footloose real?
By chance, was the guy you danced with Patrick Swayze? He likes dirty dancing so you should be fine. (too soon?)
My advice is to chill out yo. Like posters above me have said, if this is the sort of thing that leaves you agonizing all day (and yes, thinking about something like this all day to the point where you ask for advice is agonizing), then you're concerned with all the wrong things. Be you, and if he doesn't like it then pshaw, the next one might be.0 -
No, you're definitely right in over thinking this one. If I had a dollar for every girl who let me dance with them right before I kicked them to the curb, I would have like $17. That's a lot of dollars and a lot of girls who made a bad impression.
What you should have done is thrown your drink in his face. Not with your left hand, though, or he might assume you were a homosexual and using him to help win votes in the heterosexual community. I am assuming you are running for office.
Also, it should probably be a dark beverage. If you threw something milky or clear, he would assume you are a racist and invite you to his next Klan meeting. If you went to the meeting, of course, he would assume your were too easy and also dump you.
Don't refill your next drink with the same order, though. This of course gives the impression that you are an alcoholic and your body has adjusted to a very specific alcohol intake.
I would have thought this to be common knowledge.
PMSL!!!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:0 -
So apparently we should apply the three date rule to each aspect of dating?
1st date = a hug
2nd date = a kiss
3rd date = let 'er rip
1st date = listen to music in a place that has a dance floor
2nd date = add a toe tap/seat dance while the music is playing
3rd date = Boggie!
Wait, let what rip? Flatulence?!0 -
I kind of feel like I just got transported to Little House on the Prairie or something. Who fracking cares what some random guy thinks about your reputation?0
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Sometimes dancing is just dancing. I don't usually go out to find a guy I go out to have a good time. If a guy wants to have a good time with me by dancing then he is in luck. If at the end of the night we have eachother's numbers it is a bonus but that doesn't even mean one of us will call the other one.
Stop over thinking what people will think of you and just do what you want to do (as long as no one gets hurt).0 -
I kind of feel like I just got transported to Little House on the Prairie or something. Who fracking cares what some random guy thinks about your reputation?
Because then her parents would have to increase her dowry or she'll end up an unmarried spinster! Haven't you read/seen Pride and Prejudice?!
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No, you're definitely right in over thinking this one. If I had a dollar for every girl who let me dance with them right before I kicked them to the curb, I would have like $17. That's a lot of dollars and a lot of girls who made a bad impression.
What you should have done is thrown your drink in his face. Not with your left hand, though, or he might assume you were a homosexual and using him to help win votes in the heterosexual community. I am assuming you are running for office.
Also, it should probably be a dark beverage. If you threw something milky or clear, he would assume you are a racist and invite you to his next Klan meeting. If you went to the meeting, of course, he would assume your were too easy and also dump you.
Don't refill your next drink with the same order, though. This of course gives the impression that you are an alcoholic and your body has adjusted to a very specific alcohol intake.
I would have thought this to be common knowledge.
:laugh: :laugh:0 -
Well here is what you should have thought:it makes me seem easy like I'll dance with any random guy I meet at the bar, and that I might not be great dating material.
- I want to dance, so I do it,
- If this guy doesn't like it then he might not be great dating/boyfriend material for me.
If you start thinking like that for things as simple as dancing, you're going end up supporting some alcohol-imbued leech who beats the crap out of you when he comes back from the pub where he spent your money after another day during which he didn't look for a job at all.
We are not talking about you doing something unacceptable here, but: some men don't mind if their girlfriend dance around, some do. Girlfriend which you are not even if I understand properly.
Personally, I always do what I want about everything and the girls either like it or don't, either way I don't care. But then they end up liking me because I'm true to myself anyway.
The only moment when it becomes "fair" to adjust is when there is some sort of relationship going. Definitely not at the "dating/dancing" stage (unless you've been seeing that guy for 2-3 months in which case maybe ask what he thinks yes).
Last but not least, the guy clearly invited you to dance, so, surely, he wants you to dance.0 -
I kind of feel like I just got transported to Little House on the Prairie or something. Who fracking cares what some random guy thinks about your reputation?
Wow guys... we all know Christine doesn't have much experience with guys. I don't think deriding her is gonna help her let go of her inhibitions (not saying I agree she should let go of all of them).
Sometimes I think if more women worried about what some random guy thinks about their reputation, we'd have many less "I slept with him on the first date and now he poofed" convos0 -
I kind of feel like I just got transported to Little House on the Prairie or something. Who fracking cares what some random guy thinks about your reputation?
Wow guys... we all know Christine doesn't have much experience with guys. I don't think deriding her is gonna help her let go of her inhibitions (not saying I agree she should let go of all of them).
Sometimes I think if more women worried about what some random guy thinks about their reputation, we'd have many less "I slept with him on the first date and now he poofed" convos
You are right, Janie. My comment was rude and unnecessary. To Christine, I apologize profusely, it won't happen again.
I don't agree, however, that one should worry about what some random guy thinks of her reputation. As far as I'm concerned, that type of thing is my own responsibility. I would never encourage Christine (or another girl equally as inexperienced) to go out and just sleep with some random guy -- that's what happened to me at the age of 24 when I got so utterly sick of being a virgin that I just gave in, something I still regret, because it was a truly awful experience -- but it does bother me to see such a bright, attractive young woman with so much going for her to constantly sabotage her own dating experience with such low self esteem.
You know why? Because that was me at her age. I told myself all the time that I was doing everything right -- smiling, going out and having a good time, never realizing that I over-analyzed every single encounter with any attractive guy until I subconsciously pushed him away -- left wondering what the hell happened and finally just turning inward on myself and saying it was because I overweight/not attractive enough. I just don't want that for her. It's simply not true, and I want her to realize it before she's 27 and still trying to have a meaningful relationship while working extremely hard to get over her insecurities that still pop to the front of her mind every time a great guy leans in to kiss her or tells her she's beautiful.
Just my 2 cents. :flowerforyou:0 -
Wow guys... we all know Christine doesn't have much experience with guys. I don't think deriding her is gonna help her let go of her inhibitions (not saying I agree she should let go of all of them).
Sometimes I think if more women worried about what some random guy thinks about their reputation, we'd have many less "I slept with him on the first date and now he poofed" convos
You are right, Janie. My comment was rude and unnecessary. To Christine, I apologize profusely, it won't happen again.
I don't agree, however, that one should worry about what some random guy thinks of her reputation. As far as I'm concerned, that type of thing is my own responsibility. I would never encourage Christine (or another girl equally as inexperienced) to go out and just sleep with some random guy -- that's what happened to me at the age of 24 when I got so utterly sick of being a virgin that I just gave in, something I still regret, because it was a truly awful experience -- but it does bother me to see such a bright, attractive young woman with so much going for her to constantly sabotage her own dating experience with such low self esteem.
I probably overreacted honestly. I read it not as "just dancing" but dancing provocatively with this guy. To me that's two different things.
As a little goody-two shoes I never really danced in high school. I then went to a military college where most forms of entertainment were banned our freshmen year. After about two months in, they let us have a dance. I practiced and practiced secretly and was pleasantly surprised I was able to "move right' and all the guys wanted to dance provocatively with me.
Which gave me slut reputation I never lived down all 4 years I attended that school, despite the fact that I never did anything like that before or since while I was there. People I meet in the military STILL remember that reputation, and joke about how they know how *I* got promoted wink wink.
So, yeah, when I see people tell a young girl not to care what people think of her I get a little riled up.0 -
I over-analyzed every single encounter with any attractive guy until I subconsciously pushed him away
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saying it was because I overweight/not attractive enough. I just don't want that for her. It's simply not true, and I want her to realize it before she's 27 and still trying to have a meaningful relationship while working extremely hard to get over her insecurities that still pop to the front of her mind every time a great guy leans in to kiss her or tells her she's beautiful.
Good point!0
