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'Lock and Key' Event - Sound Like Fun?

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  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    I think you're very attractive and I'm sure you'll make a great impression on everyone there.

    Aw, thank you!! :blushing: And I will surely return with a report, don't worry! :happy:
  • rainman3k
    rainman3k Posts: 174 Member
    Funny I saw that meetup listed and have gone to Red Ox on Monday nights to see my friend play his acoustic set.

    This same meetup group did an event at the engine house earlier in the summer that turned out to be a lot of fun and I made several friends out of it, so I will probably end up going to it, maybe we can make a friendly competition out of it :wink:
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    Funny I saw that meetup listed and have gone to Red Ox on Monday nights to see my friend play his acoustic set.

    This same meetup group did an event at the engine house earlier in the summer that turned out to be a lot of fun and I made several friends out of it, so I will probably end up going to it, maybe we can make a friendly competition out of it :wink:

    Hey Rainman! Let's do it!! I've never been to the Red Ox in Utica, just the one in Auburn Hills by OU. Let me know if you decide to go! Yeah! :drinker:
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    So this thing starts in a few hours..... trying to not be nervous. Am going to hit the gym beforehand for a quick serotonin rush. I couldn't find anyone to go with me, so I'm flying solo. I don't even like sitting in church alone. LOL So this should be interesting. I am forcing myself to go outside of my comfort zone. Already bought the ticket. I am going to control my social anxiety this time, not the other way around.
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    So this thing starts in a few hours..... trying to not be nervous. Am going to hit the gym beforehand for a quick serotonin rush. I couldn't find anyone to go with me, so I'm flying solo. I don't even like sitting in church alone. LOL So this should be interesting. I am forcing myself to go outside of my comfort zone. Already bought the ticket. I am going to control my social anxiety this time, not the other way around.

    You will have a great time Jill! :drinker:
  • kerrymh
    kerrymh Posts: 912 Member
    Have fun!
  • Tropical_Turtle
    Tropical_Turtle Posts: 2,236 Member
    :drinker: Have a great time - cant wait to hear how it all went.
  • Moe4572
    Moe4572 Posts: 1,428 Member
    Have a great time, and just think, Mr. Right could be waiting for you tonight :flowerforyou:
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    I'll do my best to enjoy myself!

    **breathes into paper bag**

    Just kidding. :happy: :embarassed:
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    Have a great time, and just think, Mr. Right could be waiting for you tonight :flowerforyou:

    That would be so convenient - wouldn't have to go through this anymore! LOL!
  • farmers_daughter
    farmers_daughter Posts: 1,632 Member
    Drink a beer or have a glass of wine before hand, and I plan to contact you in the morning!

    DOCTORS ORDERS..............Just don't ask where I got my PHD from. :drinker:
  • NCTravellingGirl
    NCTravellingGirl Posts: 717 Member
    You have a BLAST, Jill! So excited for you... deep breaths :flowerforyou:
  • MissingMinnesota
    MissingMinnesota Posts: 7,486 Member
    Have fun and come back with some stories.
  • Mellie289
    Mellie289 Posts: 1,191 Member
    You go, girl! Can't wait to hear about it.
  • BigBrewski
    BigBrewski Posts: 922 Member
    I have some friends that went to a few of these in NY and they thought it was awesome and convinced their friends in San Francisco to search them out. I tried to look one up here in Southern California about a year ago. I didn't go becuase looking at the people that Accepted it was 30 men accepted and 5 women. So I guess I for a woman it would be great but for a man not so much.
  • nolachick
    nolachick Posts: 3,278 Member
    how'd it go?! :)
  • jesusHchris
    jesusHchris Posts: 1,405 Member
    I took up lock picking as a hobby years back (not joking). I would go to this thing and f-ing own. Do you get to take home the ones you unlock? I think I might need a bigger car. Or a van. Yes, lockpicks and a van. Nothing creepy there.
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    Wow. Well, it was quite an experience. It was not as big of an event that they said it was going to be. Instead of expecting 80+ people, I think around 40 showed up. They held the gathering in a small section in the back of the bar. I definitely met some odd characters. And since there weren't more people there, it was hard to get very far from those I didn't want to speak to anymore.

    One guy asked for my number so I gave it to him, but I don't know if I really want to go out with him or anything. I'm not good when I'm put on the spot like that. As the night went on, I started feeling a little uncomfortable. Maybe because I went from getting no attention to getting tons of it all at once. I ended up staying for a while afterwards chit-chatting with a man from Romania. I probably had the best conversation with him out of everybody else. But he was a bit too old for my liking as far as romance goes.

    I found that most every guy I talked to did the same thing for a profession - either engineering or something in the IT field. It probably makes sense for this area since those are the most predominant industries.

    I think the most fun I had was talking with other women about their experiences at other singles events! I also think I would have felt better being there with someone I knew, but it helped being chatty with other women there who were also alone.

    Thanks so much to all of you for the encouragement!! It really did help. I kept reading all the comments right up until I left to go over there! :heart:
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    You did an amazing thing Jill,took courage and resolve and shows you are going to pursue the best for you! :heart:
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    You did an amazing thing Jill,took courage and resolve and shows you are going to pursue the best for you! :heart:

    Thank you, Carl!! :heart:
  • Mellie289
    Mellie289 Posts: 1,191 Member
    Way to go! That was very brave of you and hopefully, if something like this comes up again, it won't be so daunting to go. I'm glad there were other single women there you could talk to as well.

    Lots of engineers, huh? I should have gone! :wink: That's one of the fields I look for in matches because I think they would be a good match for me (scientist). Too bad I'm nowhere near Detroit!

    Sorry you didn't meet anyone who knocked your socks off, but it's nice that someone at least asked for your number. :smile:
  • NCTravellingGirl
    NCTravellingGirl Posts: 717 Member
    I am SO happy that you got out there, Jill! It'll make the next event easier. It's funny you mention IT and engineers because that's been my experience online as well. Course I love dorky guys so it works for me. Anything scheduled in your area in mid-Sept, haha? I'm coming up to Ohio for a football game but should come check out the Detroit scene haha! I'm proud and happy for you...way to go!
  • DMZ_1
    DMZ_1 Posts: 2,889 Member
    I found that most every guy I talked to did the same thing for a profession - either engineering or something in the IT field. It probably makes sense for this area since those are the most predominant industries.

    I think the most fun I had was talking with other women about their experiences at other singles events!

    I am not surprised by Engineers and IT dominating the male ranks. Engineers and IT guys have a reputation for being dorks. In many cases, dorky/nerdy men don't have the skill to keep their iPhone full of female digits nor do they know how to get what they want from women.

    What did other women say about their experiences at other singles events? I have a pre-conceived notion of what it might be, but I am interested in reading what you have to say to see if it differs from what my notion is.
  • RMuske
    RMuske Posts: 271 Member
    Congrats, sounds fun!
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    What did other women say about their experiences at other singles events? I have a pre-conceived notion of what it might be, but I am interested in reading what you have to say to see if it differs from what my notion is.

    In short, they had issues with men getting the hint that they were not interested. I am not sure what exactly either party was saying or doing. Maybe the women were sending mixed signals, or maybe they weren't and the men really were clueless. One girl told me that she gave a guy her number and he texted her relentlessly for weeks even after she started ignoring him.

    The man I gave my number to last night (the one I couldn't say 'no' to because I was put on the spot) sent a text this morning asking if I wanted to go to dinner and a movie tonight. I already had plans, so I sent him a text saying so. Then I told a friend the conversation, and she said I totally shot him down and didn't even give him a chance. So I sent another text saying that I really did have plans tonight but maybe another time. He sent a text several hours later and asked if I was free next Friday or Saturday. I said I would be free on Friday.

    It feels odd to me to be setting up a date with someone that I know next to nothing about. We haven't been chit-chatting over text or anything like that. It's just been him asking when we can go out. Seems to me like we should be getting to know each other a bit, but a friend told me that's what the date is for. I guess I am old-fashioned as I don't even like texting with potential dates (or anyone, really). All I know about him is that his first name is Brian, he is 30, and works as a software engineer from home.

    I don't really feel like I want to go out with him, but I am being told that I need to start somewhere and get some practice in, and I shouldn't say 'no' just because I didn't feel any sparks. Should I be going on a date if I don't want to? Is this something I should be 'forcing' myself to do here? Is it right to 'use' someone for dating experience? I can see both sides of it. "You need practice" and "Don't go if you don't want to." I don't know.
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    You shouldn`t go because you can`t say no nor should you go for practice only as a persons feelings are involved.

    What I think is happening Jill is that you are holding out for a "magical" moment where you fall for a guy and he is there to sweep you away.
    It probably happens now and then but not often.

    He clearly likes you and right now is likely your appearance (who can blame him) so don`t close the door because you have not seen fireworks when you close your eyes yet.
    Go at it with an open mind and get to know him as a person.
    I see so many ladies here and elsewhere swooning over things that have nothing to do with who the guy is so I think it is good to take a more of an analytical approach to things.
  • farmers_daughter
    farmers_daughter Posts: 1,632 Member
    I say go on the date then decide afterwards. Keep an open mind he may not have been able to show u the real him at the event. he may be very compatible.....you just never know.
  • DMZ_1
    DMZ_1 Posts: 2,889 Member
    In short, they had issues with men getting the hint that they were not interested. I am not sure what exactly either party was saying or doing. Maybe the women were sending mixed signals, or maybe they weren't and the men really were clueless. One girl told me that she gave a guy her number and he texted her relentlessly for weeks even after she started ignoring him.

    The man I gave my number to last night (the one I couldn't say 'no' to because I was put on the spot) sent a text this morning asking if I wanted to go to dinner and a movie tonight. I already had plans, so I sent him a text saying so. Then I told a friend the conversation, and she said I totally shot him down and didn't even give him a chance. So I sent another text saying that I really did have plans tonight but maybe another time. He sent a text several hours later and asked if I was free next Friday or Saturday. I said I would be free on Friday.

    It feels odd to me to be setting up a date with someone that I know next to nothing about. We haven't been chit-chatting over text or anything like that. It's just been him asking when we can go out. Seems to me like we should be getting to know each other a bit, but a friend told me that's what the date is for. I guess I am old-fashioned as I don't even like texting with potential dates (or anyone, really). All I know about him is that his first name is Brian, he is 30, and works as a software engineer from home.

    I don't really feel like I want to go out with him, but I am being told that I need to start somewhere and get some practice in, and I shouldn't say 'no' just because I didn't feel any sparks. Should I be going on a date if I don't want to? Is this something I should be 'forcing' myself to do here? Is it right to 'use' someone for dating experience? I can see both sides of it. "You need practice" and "Don't go if you don't want to." I don't know.

    I am not surprised by the idea that many men struggle to get the idea that the women are not interested.

    If you're not interested in someone, don't give them your number.

    I'm not one who thinks a date should be practice. You are 32 and never married, so I would think that you've been on the dating scene since about 16 and have done enough early stage dates that additional practice would be unwarranted at this point. Plus, the guy will get up false hope, and false hope unfulfilled is hurtful to a guy. Better to back out now than later.
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member
    Firstly, well done for going to the event. I think its brilliant you got out your comfort zone and survived :bigsmile:

    Secondly, I can understand it being awkward when you gave your number to the guy. It's hard to say no to someones face at a singles event. You cant exactly say "Awww sorry, I'd love to but I have a b/f!" :laugh:

    But the thing is if you dont fancy him, like him or feel any potential, then why waste your time, and his? I dont think you need practice. I just think you need to find someone you like :flowerforyou:
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member

    What I think is happening Jill is that you are holding out for a "magical" moment where you fall for a guy and he is there to sweep you away.

    I think I used to be like that, but not anymore. I've given up on that dream. Although I admit, that would be nice. :wink:

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