My Butcher made me do it
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caribougal
Posts: 865 Member
There's this great little independent health market about a mile away, and lately I've been going there in the evenings to stock up on paleo/primal goodies while hubby gets the kiddos ready for bed.
Each time, I get into a long discussion with the hot butcher who works there. Talking about grass-fed beef naturally leads to a discussion of paleo/primal eating, and, well, one thing leads to another and I end up talking with him for half an hour. Yes, hubby is starting to get jealous.
I started to tell him about whole30, and how it was Day 3, and I've been struggling because I didn't have a lot of stuff prepared, and had killer headaches, probably from not eating enough, blah blah blah. He asked me what I ate today, and I told him I had a great veggie scramble in the morning, but then knew I wouldn't be able to get a good lunch so I ate grass-fed jerky and carrots and cucumbers for lunch, was starved most of the day, then ate a big dinner of eight shrimp and steamed veggies and shouldn't be hungry but was.
He says, "Come with me." He comes from behind the meat counter and walks me to the dairy section. He pulls down a bottle of Kalona grass-fed half and half cream, the kind with blobs of real cream on top. He opens it up, and says, "chug this, or at least take a few big sips."
What can I do? A hot butcher is pressuring me to drink cream straight from the bottle, telling me to DRINK THIS FAT NOW. whole30 be damned, I drank it. Creamy heaven. He tells me to sip it while I shop and report back to him. Yes, sir. I do.
I shop. I drink HALF THE BOTTLE.
I finally begin to feel full. I report back to Hayes (by now, we're on a first name basis).
He proceeds to tell me that I need more fat, even more important than protein. I know this, but it's definitely been off for the past few days since I eliminated dairy but I really hadn't adjusted my fat intake.
Then comes some more interesting butcher tidbits. He motions to all the meat cuts in front of me, and proceeds into a rant about how we eat way too much muscle meat in our culture. That we should only be eating 1 lb of muscle meat a week, and eating lots more organs. And not just liver, but heart, kidneys, adrenal glands, spleen. He said if you watch most carnivores eat, they go for the fatty parts and the organs first. They leave the muscle meats for the hyenas and vultures to scavenge.
I ttell him I just ordered beef liver from US Wellness Meats, and that what I really wanted was the sugar-free bacon and I just bought other stuff to hit the 7 lb minimum. He says "Oh, I'm good friends with John at US Wellness. We talk all the time. You should buy organs from him. Buy his mutton tallow, and cook everything in it."
Yes, my butcher told me to stop buying his meat, and to buy some other butcher's organs and tallow.
Then I tell him I just ordered 1/4 cow from a local farm, and it's at the processors now. He told me to call tomorrow and make sure they include all the organs and suet. I say, "suet, is that the same as tallow?". I know it's not, but didn't really remember the difference.
He says, "No, tell them you want the suet and you'll be rendering your own tallow."
I will?
I say, "Oh, I read somewhere that rendering tallow makes your house smell bad."
He scoffs, and says I read crazy stuff. "I've rendered thousands of pounds of tallow, and it will not make your house smell bad."
I think to myself, maybe a butcher, even a hot one, and especially one who wants me to eat desiccated adrenal glands, is not to be entirely trusted on this point.
Now we get a little more personal. He asks if I'm Jewish. This isn't as random as you might be thinking. Since I said I like liver and grew up eating it, it was a safe bet. Plus, I look about as Jewish as they come. It's not that big of a gene pool, we all look alike, there is a pretty big Jewish population in Boulder, and we have Jewdar. We can spot each other.
He says, "Ok, you're Ashkenasi, right? Eastern European Jewish." It's not a question. It's an assumption, and he's right. My grandparents were from Kiev. He says, "Our great-grandptents would be rolling in their graves if they knew that you were ordering a cow but might skip the organs! That's the gold! That stuff is what they dreamed of!"
Time for one last tidbit of "get to know your hot Jewish butcher". I forget how we got onto the topic of jerky, but he tells me he's bringing a new jerky product to market. In fact, he moved from Maine to Boulder to launch his business. This is not unusual, since Boulder is a little steaming hot bed of health food start-up companies. Like... A lot of them. It's crazy amazing. He said it was grass-fed beef, tallow, and cranberries, but he "pivoted" when he got here and it just didn't feel "godly" to include carbs, so it's being reformulated as just beef and tallow. I'm not sure what's so ungodly about cranberries, but whatever... This is Boulder... People talk like this all the time. He'd already told me about Ayurvedic beliefs of different animals having different heat or something.
Ok, now it's 8:30, and I do need to get home to my husband and kids. Now he has my name, my number and email. I need his help to render the suet into tallow, remember? I have his jerky business card. I head to the front to check out.
The cashier eyeballs my half-empty bottle of cream. "Hayes made me drink it" I say. "He told me I need fat."
"Oh yeah" she says. "Hayes is all about the fat," I think I spot a little bit of eye rolling. I begin to suspect that I am not the only one to listen to the hot butcher talk about tallow and organs.
I log my food for the day. I drank 600+ calories of cream! And, I was still under my calorie goal. Good thing I drank that. Goodbye whole30. Nice to have known you.
Each time, I get into a long discussion with the hot butcher who works there. Talking about grass-fed beef naturally leads to a discussion of paleo/primal eating, and, well, one thing leads to another and I end up talking with him for half an hour. Yes, hubby is starting to get jealous.
I started to tell him about whole30, and how it was Day 3, and I've been struggling because I didn't have a lot of stuff prepared, and had killer headaches, probably from not eating enough, blah blah blah. He asked me what I ate today, and I told him I had a great veggie scramble in the morning, but then knew I wouldn't be able to get a good lunch so I ate grass-fed jerky and carrots and cucumbers for lunch, was starved most of the day, then ate a big dinner of eight shrimp and steamed veggies and shouldn't be hungry but was.
He says, "Come with me." He comes from behind the meat counter and walks me to the dairy section. He pulls down a bottle of Kalona grass-fed half and half cream, the kind with blobs of real cream on top. He opens it up, and says, "chug this, or at least take a few big sips."
What can I do? A hot butcher is pressuring me to drink cream straight from the bottle, telling me to DRINK THIS FAT NOW. whole30 be damned, I drank it. Creamy heaven. He tells me to sip it while I shop and report back to him. Yes, sir. I do.
I shop. I drink HALF THE BOTTLE.
I finally begin to feel full. I report back to Hayes (by now, we're on a first name basis).
He proceeds to tell me that I need more fat, even more important than protein. I know this, but it's definitely been off for the past few days since I eliminated dairy but I really hadn't adjusted my fat intake.
Then comes some more interesting butcher tidbits. He motions to all the meat cuts in front of me, and proceeds into a rant about how we eat way too much muscle meat in our culture. That we should only be eating 1 lb of muscle meat a week, and eating lots more organs. And not just liver, but heart, kidneys, adrenal glands, spleen. He said if you watch most carnivores eat, they go for the fatty parts and the organs first. They leave the muscle meats for the hyenas and vultures to scavenge.
I ttell him I just ordered beef liver from US Wellness Meats, and that what I really wanted was the sugar-free bacon and I just bought other stuff to hit the 7 lb minimum. He says "Oh, I'm good friends with John at US Wellness. We talk all the time. You should buy organs from him. Buy his mutton tallow, and cook everything in it."
Yes, my butcher told me to stop buying his meat, and to buy some other butcher's organs and tallow.
Then I tell him I just ordered 1/4 cow from a local farm, and it's at the processors now. He told me to call tomorrow and make sure they include all the organs and suet. I say, "suet, is that the same as tallow?". I know it's not, but didn't really remember the difference.
He says, "No, tell them you want the suet and you'll be rendering your own tallow."
I will?
I say, "Oh, I read somewhere that rendering tallow makes your house smell bad."
He scoffs, and says I read crazy stuff. "I've rendered thousands of pounds of tallow, and it will not make your house smell bad."
I think to myself, maybe a butcher, even a hot one, and especially one who wants me to eat desiccated adrenal glands, is not to be entirely trusted on this point.
Now we get a little more personal. He asks if I'm Jewish. This isn't as random as you might be thinking. Since I said I like liver and grew up eating it, it was a safe bet. Plus, I look about as Jewish as they come. It's not that big of a gene pool, we all look alike, there is a pretty big Jewish population in Boulder, and we have Jewdar. We can spot each other.
He says, "Ok, you're Ashkenasi, right? Eastern European Jewish." It's not a question. It's an assumption, and he's right. My grandparents were from Kiev. He says, "Our great-grandptents would be rolling in their graves if they knew that you were ordering a cow but might skip the organs! That's the gold! That stuff is what they dreamed of!"
Time for one last tidbit of "get to know your hot Jewish butcher". I forget how we got onto the topic of jerky, but he tells me he's bringing a new jerky product to market. In fact, he moved from Maine to Boulder to launch his business. This is not unusual, since Boulder is a little steaming hot bed of health food start-up companies. Like... A lot of them. It's crazy amazing. He said it was grass-fed beef, tallow, and cranberries, but he "pivoted" when he got here and it just didn't feel "godly" to include carbs, so it's being reformulated as just beef and tallow. I'm not sure what's so ungodly about cranberries, but whatever... This is Boulder... People talk like this all the time. He'd already told me about Ayurvedic beliefs of different animals having different heat or something.
Ok, now it's 8:30, and I do need to get home to my husband and kids. Now he has my name, my number and email. I need his help to render the suet into tallow, remember? I have his jerky business card. I head to the front to check out.
The cashier eyeballs my half-empty bottle of cream. "Hayes made me drink it" I say. "He told me I need fat."
"Oh yeah" she says. "Hayes is all about the fat," I think I spot a little bit of eye rolling. I begin to suspect that I am not the only one to listen to the hot butcher talk about tallow and organs.
I log my food for the day. I drank 600+ calories of cream! And, I was still under my calorie goal. Good thing I drank that. Goodbye whole30. Nice to have known you.
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Replies
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Classic- it reads like a sit -com.
So you need more fatty goodness eh?- is that his nickname?
Only kidding I know you are married- still, you have eyes !!
Thanks for the laugh.
Kym0 -
Enjoyed your story - I can see it happening! Yay for fat!! :drinker:0
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Thank you so much for this entertainment this morning! It gave me quite the giggle. Welcome back to the goodness of dairy. :-)0
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I sure enjoyed your story.
I"d still be attracted to your butcher whether he is hot or not. The fact that he has meat (get your minds out of the gutter!) and knows that fat is HEALTHY, would do it for me. In fact, he seems to be be extremely knowledgeable about health; what a turn on!
I wonder if he knows how to cook all those organs he recommends... I might eat them if I had access to them and knew how to prepare them...
I'm single so I can be in love with your butcher if I want.... You should post a picture of him posing with all his meat.. LMAO!!!
(I should come to Colorado on vacation... just for the amazing selection of healthy food!)
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Checking flights to Boulder
Must meet hot butcher0 -
This is what the butcher told me I should buy.
http://www.drrons.com/organ-delight-traditional-superfood.htm
$60 for 30 day supply.
Let me think. Uh, no.
Oh, I forgot to mention that he basically said all men today are wusses and women are taking over the world because they don't eat enough organ meat or fat. As in, eat organ to help organ. Eating heart helps your heart. Eating liver helps your liver.
Rocky Mountain Oysters, anyone? Guys?0 -
Oh, I forgot to mention that he basically said all men today are wusses and women are taking over the world because they don't eat enough organ meat or fat.
I would agree with this if he said, "Many men today are wusses and women are taking over the world."0 -
Rocky Mountain Oysters, anyone? Guys?
LMAO....0 -
I think to myself, maybe a butcher, even a hot one, and especially one who wants me to eat desiccated adrenal glands, is not to be entirely trusted on this point.
Haha this part had me rolling. Great story, very entertaining! You've got a great connection now!
I was looking into Wellness Meats for the tallow. Can you send your recipe for bone broth my way? I always hear you talking about it but I don't know where to start.
Are you planning on doing Whole30 again after your sudden love affair with natural cream? I just started today...again. I need a partner in Whole30.0 -
Just on the subject of Butchers...mine sends out email specials.
Today's email had the subject title- " My Rump, My Rump, My lovely yearling Rump- check it out!"
What's going on with these butchers all of the sudden??:laugh:0 -
That's too funny.0
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.
Let me think. Uh, no.
Oh, I forgot to mention that he basically said all men today are wusses and women are taking over the world because they don't eat enough organ meat or fat. As in, eat organ to help organ. Eating heart helps your heart. Eating liver helps your liver.
Rocky Mountain Oysters, anyone? Guys?
AAAAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I'm taking this to the Bank missy!!
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Can you imagine if I had posted this story on the regular boards? First, being ripped apart for the whole "eat fat" thing. Then all the "what's the whole30" questions. Then those vegans slamming me for hanging out with the butcher and his meat (hey - get your heads out of the gutter, you know what I mean).0
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Damned vegans ruin just about everything.0
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Yeah, the regular boards are an exercise in futility. There's one particular vegan who is keeping a keen eye out for us, ready to jump on us with his "science" and challenge our "anecdotes".
And the "Help me i can't lose weight" while eating loads of bread, pasta, diet sodas, low fat/artificially sweetened (insert food name here), Lean Cuisine, Starbucks, etc posts... but we don't dare put in our two cents worth, because it's all about "calories in and calories out" and low fat for everyone apparently.
I think your butcher is a good example of people who deal with whole food and know it's healthy no matter what latest food corporation is trying to pressure the government/academia to tell us. I've noticed that people who work closely with whole food (butchers, small local farmers, etc) aren't fooled by all the nonsense.0 -
Man I love this group 0
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love it.0
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Man I love this group
+10
