Dealbreaker- not liking your pets?

BelMckenzie

So I know some of the single peeps have pets as well, but I had a guy that I went on a few dates with and he met my dog, tell me that my dog is crazy (he is right, but I love my crazy mutt). However, it got me to thinking that if a guy ever hated my dog or asked me to give it up before becoming official, that guy would have no chance with me whatsoever.

Does anyone else feel with way? I know I have a strong attachment to my dog, but she is my constant companion.

christine24t

If it was joking, no, not a dealbreaker. One of my best friends dislikes cats, and sometimes makes comments about my cat, but she's joking. That's totally cool. But if he was serious, it would be a dealbreaker.

oddyogi

Definitely a dealbreaker. My dogs came first and they love me unconditionally. They're my babies.

I probably wouldn't ever like anyone that didn't like dogs, though.

RMuske

My dog can be down right awful sometimes. She is super smart and super mischivous. But if someone told me they wanted me to get rid of her in order to be serious with them I would walk away. Bella is my baby.

TheKitsune6

If they expected me to get rid of my pets for whatever reason, or expect me to not get more pets in the future, it's not going to work. I am an animal person, the rest of my life is going to involve animals in both my career and my private life. He can dislike them, he can ignore them, whatever. As long as my training methods are honored (positive reinforcement) and as long as he isn't mean to my animals it will be fine.

The man could be perfect in every way but if he's allergic/hates animals I will stay single.

DMZ_1

When I am thinking about the topic of pet ownership, I consider a woman and her pets to be a package deal. I will never ask a woman to give up her pets.

I prefer the concept of two people not having any pets prior to getting married. I consider caring for a pet to be a major undertaking. I feel that the idea of having your significant other in place should be the first step in household formation, and that person is the person you build around. I think it is easier for a couple to decide to have a pet rather than having one person already having a pet and another non pet owner has to adjust to a new pet in their lives as well without having a choice in the matter. To me, a pet is part of a later stage of the establishment of a household.

The previous paragraph does not mean that I won't date a pet owner. A lot of factors are at play. But it is meant to show what I feel is the preferable arrangement for me as a non pet owner.

AnnaPixie

I'm allergic :sad: But still, perfect in every way!! :bigsmile:

:laugh:

TheKitsune6

I'm allergic :sad: But still, perfect in every way!! :bigsmile:

:laugh:

Dammit Anna! Now I can't marry you

AnnaPixie

I'm allergic :sad: But still, perfect in every way!! :bigsmile:

:laugh:

Dammit Anna! Now I can't marry you

I knoooooooooooooooooooow!!! :sad:

Mellie289

I don't like dogs and can't imagine ever living with them, so I won't date men who have dogs. I tried once. I'm 100% crazy cat lady! I need someone who also at least likes cat as a pet and doesn't need to eventually get a dog, otherwise, it's a definite deal-breaker.

kerrymh

I have in my POF profile that I can't see myself in a long term relationship with a non dog lover.
I don't have one right now only because I don't have a proper space but my 2 year plan involves being a dog owner and I need that love of canines in a partner. deal breaker!

MissingMinnesota

I am a major pet lover and would need to be with someone that at least will get along with a pet. I still had my cat when I was dating my last boyfriend and I told him we were a packaged deal. He isn't a fan of cats but knew he was going to have to at least put up with my cat. I had to put my cat down in March due to kidney failure so right now I am petless but I will have another one in the future.

jesusHchris

I just read the TITLE of this thread and got all Jerry Springer even thinking about it. Full on, jump out of chair, waving-hand-snap "AH NAH YOU DI-INT!"

solman66

Just thought I'd throw it out there that the reverse can also be a dealbreaker. I like animals, but I have no pets myself. I've got no issue with people that love their pets, but if a girl tells/shows me that she will never love me as much as she loves her dog or cat, then thanks but no thanks.

pa_jorg

My dog is absolutely my best friend in the entire world. Corny but true...and if you don't like dogs then you wouldn't like me anyway, so yes, my dog and I are a package deal.

However, she was also abused (obviously buy a man) before I got her and is sometimes afraid of and barks at guys, which does not help my plight of being single. :laugh: Actually, I just saw this similar story today and it totally made me laugh: http://www.thefrisky.com/2012-09-10/girl-talk-my-dog-is-a-cockblock/

NCTravellingGirl

My dog has been there through every tough time in my life. He laid beside me while I recovered from having my gall bladder removed. I can not even imagine life without him and don't even want to think about it. He's also an excellent judge of character. Ex boyfriend that didn't like dogs....Schroder hid from him. I should have known then. Everyone else... is at my house to see Schroder (in his opinion) and he wants to make them feel welcome with dog kisses, haha :laugh: No man comes between me and my dog, but the right guy can be part of our family

BelMckenzie

Just thought I'd throw it out there that the reverse can also be a dealbreaker. I like animals, but I have no pets myself. I've got no issue with people that love their pets, but if a girl tells/shows me that she will never love me as much as she loves her dog or cat, then thanks but no thanks.

I love my dog, but it's not the same as loving my partner. Honestly in a relationship, my partner would always come first over my dog since I recongize its a dog but that being said, I wont be with someone who didn't accept my dog or cats.

Tropical_Turtle

my pets and I are a package deal. They don't have to love my animals, but they have to accept they are my furbabies, and I will not get rid of them for any man. Total deal breaker

Prahasaurus

Total deal breaker. My dog is part of my family. We're a package deal... I'd take a bullet for Eda.

Fortunately, there is no sane woman who couldn't help but love him. So not really an issue.

--P

Prahasaurus

Honestly in a relationship, my partner would always come first over my dog since I recongize its a dog...

Blasphemy!

--P

Nerple

If someone only tolerated my dog I could live with it, but if someone openly hated or constantly complained about my dog then there is no hope of that relationship ever going anywhere. Though if someone doesn't love the fact that Annabel gets super excited whenever you come over, I think they're insane anyway. And Annabel loves everybody, except the two dogs who attacked her like 3 years ago who she loves to antagonize. Not saying Annabel is an angel, she barks at anything outside, climbs everything, and can still be hyper even at 6 years old but she is perfectly loveable.

Around the time I got Annabel, I was sort of seeing a girl long distance who told me years after that she was constantly jealous of Annabel because she thought I cared more for my dog than her.

rml_16

I agree with you. Pets are our family. A friend of mine got rid of her dog for a guy. Just shy of their one-year wedding anniversary, he told her he wanted to keep living together and sleeping together, but also get divorced and see other people.

So, she had no dog and the man was gone, too. Love me, love my pets. We're a package deal.

MikeM53082

I'd prefer not to date someone with pets. Life is busy and complex enough the way it is. Even though pets provide companionship, I've always seen them as more of a liability instead of an asset.

Even though it's not an ultimate deal breaker, realistically, I can't see myself dating someone with a cat or dog.

kendrafallon

While I had cats, it was love me, love my cats. So yes it was a deal breaker if the chap couldn't deal with my cats.

JanieJack

I wouldn't "not date" someone who had pets, but I have a friend with a dog whose hair irritates my eyes if I'm over too long. So while I would love to have pets in the future (I love both cats and dogs-they're so different), I think I would be less likely to settle down with someone who insists on pets in the bed.

Roadie2000

Huge dealbreaker. My dog is basically part of the family, people don't just give up their children, why would I be expected to give up my dog? And I've had dogs my whole life, I don't think I could marry anyone that didn't like them. Especially Coop, he's probably one of the coolest dogs ever.

TheKitsune6

Just thought I'd throw it out there that the reverse can also be a dealbreaker. I like animals, but I have no pets myself. I've got no issue with people that love their pets, but if a girl tells/shows me that she will never love me as much as she loves her dog or cat, then thanks but no thanks.

Yeah, I don't know if anybody actually said realistically that they're never going to love a significant other more than their pet - these are just people saying that their furbabies are not expendable. Many people adopt animals just to toss them away when they become inconvenient (moving and not willing to find a place that accepts animals, having a baby and not willing to work around the animal, not wanting to put in the effort to train properly, etc) so it really warms my heart that so many people seem as adamant as I am about our four legged friends

AnnaPixie

Actually, I find it quite startling that the peeps would choose a pet over the love of another human being.

So why do you guys want a partner then? Seems to me like your life is fulfilled with the love of an animal??

Forgive me, I'm not against animals, but I've been allergic since childhood so I've never formed a bond with one. I'm genuinely interested in how you can decide an animal is more important in life?

I mean, if the love of my life has a dog, I'd live on anti histamines to accommodate him, but you guys dont seem to want to make any sacrifice here..................so??

Myslissa

I understand people that dont have children that love their pets like their children but I view an animal as an animal. I dont want one in my house or especially my bed. My best friend treats her cats and dog like they are her babies. I understand that, i also respect that they live in her house and I am only a guest but for me, no animals in the house. i am not sure how I would handle it if I were to date someone that allows the dog or cat in the bed. Would be something to deal with along with any other issue, i guess.

pa_jorg

Actually, I find it quite startling that the peeps would choose a pet over the love of another human being.

So why do you guys want a partner then? Seems to me like your life is fulfilled with the love of an animal??

Forgive me, I'm not against animals, but I've been allergic since childhood so I've never formed a bond with one. I'm genuinely interested in how you can decide an animal is more important in life?

I mean, if the love of my life has a dog, I'd live on anti histamines to accommodate him, but you guys dont seem to want to make any sacrifice here..................so??

I think it is very much like Roadie said... you wouldn't ask someone who had a child to give them up. Pets are the equivalent of children, not spouses, in my opinion.

On the compromise front, one example is that my dog currently sleeps on my bed. If I had a spouse, I wouldn't allow her to do that any longer. Things like that are what need to be re-arranged, not the love of the animal itself.

Prahasaurus

Life is always a compromise. My dog is with my in-laws, which whom I have a great relationship (my ex has a terrible relationship with her own family, but that's another story).

I just couldn't keep him in my 3rd story apartment, with no elevator, traveling like I do, after the divorce. But I see him just about every weekend. He has a huge garden, he goes for long walks in the forest behind their house everyday, etc. I pay "dog support" so he has quality food, etc. He's getting quite old, but he's seen it all: my marriage, two kids, divorce. He's traveled from Europe to the USA and back, living on two continents, he has his own dog passport, and probably more frequent flyer miles than most Americans.

--P