Dealbreaker- not liking your pets?
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I just don't see myself getting to the point where I had to choose. If they have a problem with me having a dog then they shouldn't date me. Yes it is an animal but he has also been my companion for almost 7 years. Plus, I've always been a dog person, I wouldn't just be giving up my dog, I'd basically be giving up dogs for life. That would be even harder.Actually, I find it quite startling that the peeps would choose a pet over the love of another human being.
So why do you guys want a partner then? Seems to me like your life is fulfilled with the love of an animal??
Forgive me, I'm not against animals, but I've been allergic since childhood so I've never formed a bond with one. I'm genuinely interested in how you can decide an animal is more important in life?
I mean, if the love of my life has a dog, I'd live on anti histamines to accommodate him, but you guys dont seem to want to make any sacrifice here..................so??
Sacrifice? If someone told you you had to either take a pill every day or give up your kids (or something else very dear to you) what would you do? I don't see any middle ground here.0 -
Actually, I find it quite startling that the peeps would choose a pet over the love of another human being.
So why do you guys want a partner then? Seems to me like your life is fulfilled with the love of an animal??
Forgive me, I'm not against animals, but I've been allergic since childhood so I've never formed a bond with one. I'm genuinely interested in how you can decide an animal is more important in life?
I mean, if the love of my life has a dog, I'd live on anti histamines to accommodate him, but you guys dont seem to want to make any sacrifice here..................so??
Anna, can you ever have too much love in your life? There are so many different kinds of love, and animal love is special in its own way. Animal love is pure and unquestioning. My cats miss me when I'm gone and run up to me when I get home. They cuddle me because I am a source of comfort, not just food (though that helped with the bonding process, haha). They have adapted their natural lifestyle and communication methods to accommodate me as much as they can and I do the same for them.
It's not that I am so fulfilled I could never have a partner in my life, it's that I wouldn't be fulfilled if I had to be with someone that wouldn't let me have that animal love that I treasure and appreciate so much. It's not that I won't make any sacrifice - it's that I won't sacrifice my animals or my passion for them. I wouldn't resent a person that didn't want animals, I just wouldn't date them.0 -
I just don't see myself getting to the point where I had to choose. If they have a problem with me having a dog then they shouldn't date me. Yes it is an animal but he has also been my companion for almost 7 years. Plus, I've always been a dog person, I wouldn't just be giving up my dog, I'd basically be giving up dogs for life. That would be even harder.Actually, I find it quite startling that the peeps would choose a pet over the love of another human being.
So why do you guys want a partner then? Seems to me like your life is fulfilled with the love of an animal??
Forgive me, I'm not against animals, but I've been allergic since childhood so I've never formed a bond with one. I'm genuinely interested in how you can decide an animal is more important in life?
I mean, if the love of my life has a dog, I'd live on anti histamines to accommodate him, but you guys dont seem to want to make any sacrifice here..................so??
Sacrifice? If someone told you you had to either take a pill every day or give up your kids (or something else very dear to you) what would you do? I don't see any middle ground here.
^^ This. It's not a sacrifice or choosing one over the other. The right person for me will like my dog or they aren't the right person! Besides, Schroder has earned his place in 6.5 years. Like I said, he's been there through it all. The right guy should be equally as devoted and half as loving(I don't need quite so many kisses haha). I'm sure he's as equally cool as Coop , Dave, and will be nice and not say he's more ha!0 -
Love me...love my animals. They are part of who I am and part of my family sooooo....
While they don't "replace" a human companion, they definitely fill a void and provide true, unconditional love. After our family dog passed, I waited awhile before getting another b/c my son was preparing for his first year of college, etc. After he left, my house was too quiet! Couldn't see myself growing old with my cats (although that would have been their preference). I rescued a dog last year and definitely stirred it up, but am so happy I did. He's great company and alot of fun, but like having a toddler at times. I keep telling Tucker he's lucky he's so damn cute...
Crazy animal lady? Yea, probably. But the right person should find that charming, right???0 -
Not only is it a dealbreaker for me... but if someone was willing to give up their dog for someone they were dating I would be disgusted by them! Cats are another issue though
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All in all sounds like another reason I was right to swear off having a pet of my own almost 20 years ago when our house cat died at 14 + years of having her.
Makes no difference to me at all if a lady has one or not.
I like animals just don`t want to get attached to them for the short time they are here.0 -
Obviously the relationship I have with my dog is different than the relationship I have with my boyfriend. The love is different. My man has a cat, our pets HATE each other. But we make it work because we both know our pets are important to us. We care about each other enough that it doesn't matter.
It is not about choosing a love for my pet over a love from/for a man. It is completely different in my mind. Finding someone who understands that is always a plus!0 -
Actually, I find it quite startling that the peeps would choose a pet over the love of another human being.
So why do you guys want a partner then? Seems to me like your life is fulfilled with the love of an animal??
Forgive me, I'm not against animals, but I've been allergic since childhood so I've never formed a bond with one. I'm genuinely interested in how you can decide an animal is more important in life?
I mean, if the love of my life has a dog, I'd live on anti histamines to accommodate him, but you guys dont seem to want to make any sacrifice here..................so??
The compromise I would make in that situation would be to ask the SO to take the pills while my current pet is alive and agree to either no more pets or one the SO was not allergic to after that. I would not get rid of my current pet and I don't think it's fair to ask that. It's a living creature, not a toy.
It would be difficult for me to never have a pet again, but for the right person, I would probably make that sacrifice. But ONLY for a medical reason. If you just plain don't like animals, you're not for me.0 -
Just thought I'd throw it out there that the reverse can also be a dealbreaker. I like animals, but I have no pets myself. I've got no issue with people that love their pets, but if a girl tells/shows me that she will never love me as much as she loves her dog or cat, then thanks but no thanks.
This, except with dudes.0 -
I mean, if the love of my life has a dog, I'd live on anti histamines to accommodate him, but you guys dont seem to want to make any sacrifice here..................so??
The compromise I would make in that situation would be to ask the SO to take the pills while my current pet is alive and agree to either no more pets or one the SO was not allergic to after that. I would not get rid of my current pet and I don't think it's fair to ask that. It's a living creature, not a toy.
It would be difficult for me to never have a pet again, but for the right person, I would probably make that sacrifice. But ONLY for a medical reason. If you just plain don't like animals, you're not for me.
I, honestly, would have to say no if someone asked me to take meds for the rest of my life to be with them. I have sensitive skin and many processed/artificial foods break me out. I already go way out of my way in daily life to ensure I can still go out to eat with friends or eat at their houses w/o getting sick or broken out or swelling or whatever. There’s no way I’m going to willingly add to that the chore and danger of constantly taking meds.
I had dogs growing up, and this isn’t an issue with all animals. If the love of my life had a pet that aggravated my condition, and that pet couldn’t be contained to certain parts of the house or outside where we can peacefully co-exist then it’s just gonna have to be one of those unrequited loves you see in campy B movies.0 -
Actually, I find it quite startling that the peeps would choose a pet over the love of another human being.
So why do you guys want a partner then? Seems to me like your life is fulfilled with the love of an animal??
Forgive me, I'm not against animals, but I've been allergic since childhood so I've never formed a bond with one. I'm genuinely interested in how you can decide an animal is more important in life?
I mean, if the love of my life has a dog, I'd live on anti histamines to accommodate him, but you guys dont seem to want to make any sacrifice here..................so??
I don't see my dog as any kind of love of my life... but I do see him as a child. He is dependent on me and I took on that responsibility. I'm guessing if someone had serious issue with my dog it would never get close to love with them.0 -
Interesting responses peeps :flowerforyou:
I doubt if anyone would resign themselves to singledom for the rest of their life because of a pet. But the way I understand it is that the lifestyle of a pet owner is going to require someone compatible/empathatic and preferably someone who dotes on the pet too.
I guess that's why they ask the question on most dating sites?
I agree with Janie, taking meds isnt great. And sometimes feels just as uncomfortable as the allergy itself. But my ex is a huge pet lover and I would rather be with him than not. So you make compromises and sacrifices as with most things in life. I think it goes both ways though, I certainly would die (my allergy is asthma) if I had to sleep with the dog!! (no meds are THAT good!) :laugh:
I agree the ultimate fix for someone like me,and Janie, would be to get a dog that is dander free, or a different type of pet. I think tortoise are cool (but possibly illegal now.....lol) or a rabbit? Can you take them for walks?? :bigsmile:0 -
Interesting responses peeps :flowerforyou:
I doubt if anyone would resign themselves to singledom for the rest of their life because of a pet. But the way I understand it is that the lifestyle of a pet owner is going to require someone compatible/empathatic and preferably someone who dotes on the pet too.
I guess that's why they ask the question on most dating sites?
I agree with Janie, taking meds isnt great. And sometimes feels just as uncomfortable as the allergy itself. But my ex is a huge pet lover and I would rather be with him than not. So you make compromises and sacrifices as with most things in life. I think it goes both ways though, I certainly would die (my allergy is asthma) if I had to sleep with the dog!! (no meds are THAT good!) :laugh:
I agree the ultimate fix for someone like me,and Janie, would be to get a dog that is dander free, or a different type of pet. I think tortoise are cool (but possibly illegal now.....lol) or a rabbit? Can you take them for walks?? :bigsmile:
I had a rabbit when I was younger. He was trained to walk on a leash. When I took him to the MN state fair I got some strange looks when I walked him into the barn but most people just wanted to pet him.0 -
Interesting responses peeps :flowerforyou:
I doubt if anyone would resign themselves to singledom for the rest of their life because of a pet. But the way I understand it is that the lifestyle of a pet owner is going to require someone compatible/empathatic and preferably someone who dotes on the pet too.
Yes! Or at least tolerates. My last boyfriend tolerated my cats, which was fine. He never mistreated them or was mean to them. If they jumped into his lap he might pet them he might not. That was totally okay with me.
On the flip side of that I come across a lot of animal lovers that have different ideas than I do about training/pet life. Considering my career focus is on animal behavior and training I fully expect that my training ideologies will be the norm - no exceptions. Unfortunately a lot of people watch television or adhere to disproved theories and think they know better which is endlessly irritating. It would be like if I was a doctor and my SO thought they knew better because they looked up symptoms on WebMD.I agree with Janie, taking meds isnt great. And sometimes feels just as uncomfortable as the allergy itself. But my ex is a huge pet lover and I would rather be with him than not. So you make compromises and sacrifices as with most things in life. I think it goes both ways though, I certainly would die (my allergy is asthma) if I had to sleep with the dog!! (no meds are THAT good!) :laugh:
If someone OFFERED to take drugs to try and make it work I would be fine with that. I would never ask that of someone though, I understand that allergy medications can be horrible simply from knowing people that take them just so they can have their own pet.I agree the ultimate fix for someone like me,and Janie, would be to get a dog that is dander free, or a different type of pet. I think tortoise are cool (but possibly illegal now.....lol) or a rabbit? Can you take them for walks?? :bigsmile:
Yep! You can train rabbits to be leash trained! You can train any animal almost anything (as long as it's physically possible for the critter, obviously no turtle is going to fly from it's own volition) with proper training and time investment. For a rabbit I suggest starting with a young one and socializing it a lot! They're prey naturally so have a tendency to be very shy.0 -
I agree with everything Kitsune has said..
When I spend the night at my bf's house, it's us two, his two big dogs, and my two little dogs all in the bed. It can get a little cramped! :laugh:0 -
I agree with everything Kitsune has said..
When I spend the night at my bf's house, it's us two, his two big dogs, and my two little dogs all in the bed. It can get a little cramped! :laugh:
do you have sex with the dogs watching?? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
I'm not sure how 'proper' that question is, but I'm asking anyway :bigsmile:0 -
I had a rabbit when I was younger. He was trained to walk on a leash. When I took him to the MN state fair I got some strange looks when I walked him into the barn but most people just wanted to pet him.
For a rabbit I suggest starting with a young one and socializing it a lot! They're prey naturally so have a tendency to be very shy.
Awwwww so cute, I'm gonna get a rabbit :bigsmile:
Hang on, rabbits are furry, do they have dander?? :noway:0 -
I agree with everything Kitsune has said..
When I spend the night at my bf's house, it's us two, his two big dogs, and my two little dogs all in the bed. It can get a little cramped! :laugh:
do you have sex with the dogs watching?? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
I'm not sure how 'proper' that question is, but I'm asking anyway :bigsmile:
I might be a weirdo but I'm always sure to close the cats out when it sexy times hahaha! I just open up the door when we go to sleep0 -
I don't own any pets. I live in a apartment that is strictly no pets rule. Sometimes I wish I could get a dog but then I'd have to move and I get turned off by that idea. :laugh: I can understand pets being a dealbreaker especially if one of the couple is allergic.0
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I had a rabbit when I was younger. He was trained to walk on a leash. When I took him to the MN state fair I got some strange looks when I walked him into the barn but most people just wanted to pet him.
For a rabbit I suggest starting with a young one and socializing it a lot! They're prey naturally so have a tendency to be very shy.
Awwwww so cute, I'm gonna get a rabbit :bigsmile:
Hang on, rabbits are furry, do they have dander?? :noway:
Probably since you do have to brush them. Also rabbits ummm go the bathroom a lot!0 -
I agree with everything Kitsune has said..
When I spend the night at my bf's house, it's us two, his two big dogs, and my two little dogs all in the bed. It can get a little cramped! :laugh:
do you have sex with the dogs watching?? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
I'm not sure how 'proper' that question is, but I'm asking anyway :bigsmile:
If it's impromptu and we're just waking up then we'll try to knock them off and cover up with the blankets.. but his dogs have jumped back on before, hahahaha0 -
Me + my dog = package deal.0
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That would absolutely be a deal breaker for me. My animals are my family :-)0
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I don't have any pets. I grew up with cats and I don't have the space or lifestyle to support owning a dog.
That being said, I see people and their pets as a package deal. I couldn't dream of asking someone to give up their pet for me (nor would I expect that). But if someone had one that I really couldn't stand, I'd have to second guess whether I really wanted a relationship with that person. But it would have to be one awful pet or a royally messed up pet/owner relationship to really put me off.0 -
Not only is it a dealbreaker for me... but if someone was willing to give up their dog for someone they were dating I would be disgusted by them! Cats are another issue though
Here here!0 -
I don't have any pets. I grew up with cats and I don't have the space or lifestyle to support owning a dog.
That being said, I see people and their pets as a package deal. I couldn't dream of asking someone to give up their pet for me (nor would I expect that). But if someone had one that I really couldn't stand, I'd have to second guess whether I really wanted a relationship with that person. But it would have to be one awful pet or a royally messed up pet/owner relationship to really put me off.
That's an issue for pet owners too. If I was dating someone and he had a particularly rotten chihuahua that snapped at people and never stopped barking I'd move on. How people raise/treat/train their animals says a lot about them.0 -
I don't have any pets. I grew up with cats and I don't have the space or lifestyle to support owning a dog.
That being said, I see people and their pets as a package deal. I couldn't dream of asking someone to give up their pet for me (nor would I expect that). But if someone had one that I really couldn't stand, I'd have to second guess whether I really wanted a relationship with that person. But it would have to be one awful pet or a royally messed up pet/owner relationship to really put me off.
That's an issue for pet owners too. If I was dating someone and he had a particularly rotten chihuahua that snapped at people and never stopped barking I'd move on. How people raise/treat/train their animals says a lot about them.
I agree with this as well. If you have an awful pet that has never been trained properly and the dog still pees on the floor at 5 yr old- let's just say I will never be moving in until you train that dog properly.0 -
I just got a message from my non-boyfriend boyfriend. He has only spent the night twice, last night being night #2. He just said that Daisy was curled up next to him when he woke up. I had already left for work so I didn't get to see. It made my heart melt when he told me that.0
