I need some support right now please

LMPMOM4

I am about to throw in the towel and stop my metabolism reset. This is week 4 for me, beginning of week 5 actually. I have gained over 10 pounds and I can no longer fit into any of my clothes. Last summer I weighed 151, which was high for me. As of today I weigh 180. I just keep gaining and gaining no matter what I try. I put on the first 10 trying to do the whole Geneen Roth eat when hungry stop when satisfied thing. I put on the second 10 doing paleo and not counting calories. And now trying to do a metabolism reset I have gained another 10.

I have a bodymedia fit. It says my TDEE is 2600. I am pretty active. I have four young children. I exercise a lot. I eat healthy but right now I have been allowing more snack type foods because I am completely and utterly burned out on "diet" foods. I really do not think I burn 2600 calories in a day. I fear if I continue to eat that much I will just continue to get fatter and fatter. the weight gain does not really seem to be stopping for me. It should have by now.

I am 5'6". I can't even get my size 8 pants up my *kitten* anymore. I usually only weigh this much after I've had a baby. And my youngest is three and that is how I feel, like I've just had a baby and my body is bloated and way too big.

I seriously don't know what to do. I know this is not an easy process to go through and I expected it to be hard but I absolutely feel like crap right now. I can't gain any more weight. I just can't. I had a phone consult set up with Leigh Peele last week but she canceled so it's going to be tomorrow. I'm sure she will have some insight for me. But I'm having a pretty bad break down at this point in the process. I went on vacation this past weekend with my husband. We went to San Antonio without the kids. We've only had three total weekends away from kids in the last 8 years. I had a BLAST, but I was so miserable about my body and food the whole time. My pants/clothes were tight. We love the food down there and I didn't restrict my food, but it was so hard to feel like I was just getting bigger with every bite I was taking. I certainly didn't feel like being all sexy and amorous. It sucked.

What should I do? last week I was feeling good. This week I am miserable. Should I be miserable for another three weeks or lower my calories and try to stop this terrible gain cycle? Does this process REALLY, truly work for everyone? I am doubting big time right now. I really wish I knew what my true TDEE was. that would help this process, I think.

RJ74

I wish I had some fabulous words of wisdom for you, but I don't. My heart hurts for you, though.:frown: I am up 5 lbs. and am just starting my 6th week. My clothes, that were just starting to get loose, are tight again. It sucks. So, I do know how you feel. HOWEVER, I have to keep reminding myself that this is a learning process, not a quick fix. I've tried the quick fixes. They work until you stop counting points, drinking shakes, etc., etc. Then it's right back up and sometimes more. So, I would rather learn a healthy, maintainable way to give my body what it needs to do what I ask of it than do something harmful and unhealthy. It will take time, but I have time. I'm not racing anyone.

I am so sorry that you are frusturated. I would totally hug you if I could. Just take a deep breath and remember why you started your "reset" to start with.

photojunkie28

There are SOOO many factors that make this process different for everyBODY. The only thing I can really do is tell you that it worked for me. I didn't follow everything to a T and I still don't but it's science and math. It works. I worked up to my TDEE (or what I thought was my TDEE at least...turns out I was several hundred too low so I will be resetting again in conjunction with my 2 week vacation at the end of the month) I gained around 6 lbs and during the process all but 2 of them came back off on their own as I started to level out at the end and the bloated disgusting feelings subsided.

I went into cut with hesitation that it was going to work, but I had done everything else and so why not at least try at that point I figured. Process of elimination and some encouraging words from my fitness instructor put me on a path to success.

Although the weight is coming off slower than what I was used to (starving my body) it is coming off and in roughly the last 14-16 weeks I am down those last 2 lbs that I had gained PLUS 10 lbs more.

If you have more questions feel free to ask me. I can't speak for everyone, but I trust the process.

If it helps any I am a very active person as well. I have an active job and workout a lot too. I'm 5'5 and weigh 169 currently and I eat around 1900 calories to lose weight (however this is actually still too low for me I recently found out and will be increasing this number)

Best of luck and I hope to read of your sucess in the future!

moylie

I sooooo know how you feel. We have very similar stats, tho I only have two kiddos I'm 41 & 5'6". Started EM2WL at 145, only wanting to lose another 8-10lbs. I did a reset for a bit over 12 wks. and ballooned to a 15-20 pound weight gain. ARGGGGGHHHHH! Every piece of clothing I bought from last season is too small. I have like one pair of pants that fits comfortably. If I had to do it over, I would have checked my numbers on Scooby more frequently, and changed them. Obviously what it said was my TDEE was too high. I expected some weightgain during reset, because everybody said that was normal. I did NOT expect almost 20lbs. In hindsight, the Scooby #'s must not have been right for my TDEE. I'm doing a 15-20% cut right now, and the weight isn't really budging. Gain a pound, lose the same pound. I've increased my activity since summer (I slacked off). I'm hoping my lifting routine is the cause of the stalled weightloss.

It's a daily mental struggle not to go back to my 1400-1500 daily intake. After all, I lost weight doing that. I'm NOT losing doing this method. It is completely discouraging that it is going to take 5-6 months to just get back down to where I was before following EM2WL. I'm NOT a patient person, either. I wish I had more encouraging words for you, but wanted to let you know you're not alone.

BluthLover

I'm so sorry! I know this doesn't help much but I feel your pain! I am struggling too. I have tried many things and only seen the scale go up and up. It is very discouraging. I feel like I've tried everything and nothing has worked. All I can say is that you have put in the time so far. You don't wanna give up and go for a quick fix. All that will happen is you will be right back here 6 months down the line. Just hang in there. Give it a good try! You can do this!

HeidiHoMom

Just a thought, have you had your thyroid checked?

BlondieBride

Honestly, I would do what you feel is going to be best for YOU. If you feel like you need to stop the reset and start a cut then do it. It is better than being miserable. I also recommend getting some blood work etc done just to rule out any underlying problems!

Kiris2

Truly, it will get better! Keep on with it, it is a process that takes time and patience. Everyone who stays with the EMTWL is very happy and adjusting their weight after all the misery of gaining some pounds! Keep in mind...were you losing before the reset? Could you have kept on reducing your cals to keep losing more?? I could not, and I could not see myself continuing to lose and gain the rest of what life I have left. Think about it, does the rest of your life mean moer to you??? Bite the bullet now. then be as close to "normal" as you can be, it will come together..

LMPMOM4

I have had my thyroid checked, just a month or so ago. Normal.

chicbuc

You've gotten some good advice so far. Just wanted to throw in a hug!

rosied915

(((HUGS))) cause I know how you feel.

I gained a total of 24 pounds since EM2WL~ 14 of it on Reset.

Your post is identical to one of mine about 4-6 weeks ago. I HAD to go and buy new, LARGER clothes, was very, very uncomfortable and at times, in physical pain and was just about ready to reach for my Weight Watchers manuals!

To make a long story short, i will tell you this: I learned that we all have to TWEAK this plan to our own body's needs. Depending on your age, medical history, dieting history and current level of exercise~ the numbers that are "suggested as a guideline" for weight loss or Reset or calorie burns may have to be adjusted to YOU.

In my case, I found out that part of my gain was due to the fact that I had cut out cardio altogether and was only doing NROL4W. And due to family obligations, I was missing my usual workots quite often.

I adjusted my calorie goal to just over my BMR and now I only "eat back" my exercise calories on the days that I actually exercise instead of eating the "average" that is built into your TDEE and TDEE - Cut.

My weight gain has leveled off but NOT at the TDEE number that Scooby gave me~ it's at a MUCH lower number.

So, for me, my Maintenance number is MUCH lower than what is predicted for me~ is it my age? my medical history? my dieting history? my level of exercise? the food that I eat? maybe all of the above!

My suggestion for you~ TWEAK things to YOU~ play with your numbers~ first find out what YOUR calorie goal is to maintain/ stop gaining and go from there.

Good Luck~ remember, you are not alone!

Noor13

I know it is difficult, but most of people who did the reset did gain quite a bit of weight.
It is normal, and even though it is so frustrating, your body needs to be fed properly in order to function.
If you are very active and are chasing after 4 little children beside exercising, you need enough food.

You have a BM device, so use it. I only have a FitBit, and it gives me an average reading of 2600 as well. I am 5'7.75 and I weigh 154 lbs. I started this journey at 140 lbs, so you can see I did gain quite a bit as well.

But you have to keep in mind that this is a change for good. There is no way I will ever go back to a low calorie diet. It might be working for a short period of time, but what will you do, if you stall? Lower the cals more, exercise more? You always have to have in mind, that you have to find a way that is sustainable for the rest of your life.

Consistency is important when doing a reset. If you can keep it up for another 4 weeks, you are good to go to your cut. You have come such a long way, don't throw it all away.

It is frustrating, yes, but it will get better. My clothes all did not fit well after finishing the reset either, and since then I have gained another 4 lbs, but my clothes do fit again, so I know something is happening.

Keep strong-you can do it.

LMPMOM4

Thanks everyone for the support. It is so frustrating when the numbers and the science do not align with what you are doing. I had a good talk with my husband this morning and he wants me to go see a dietitian or Dr. who specializes in this type of stuff. he has seen me try and try and try and not be able to lose weight - only gain the harder I try. I'm not really hopeful it will help but at least I will feel like I'm doing something to try to figure this out. I have been struggling with my weight for years and years and years. I just feel like I want to be done and accept that my body wants to be big. It's such a struggle.

BluthLover

Thanks everyone for the support. It is so frustrating when the numbers and the science do not align with what you are doing. I had a good talk with my husband this morning and he wants me to go see a dietitian or Dr. who specializes in this type of stuff. he has seen me try and try and try and not be able to lose weight - only gain the harder I try. I'm not really hopeful it will help but at least I will feel like I'm doing something to try to figure this out. I have been struggling with my weight for years and years and years. I just feel like I want to be done and accept that my body wants to be big. It's such a struggle.

It is a struggle but just hang in there!! You will find what works for you. You just can't give up.

norcal_yogi

i'm so sorry you are so frustrated!! i certainly would be as well.... (which is the main reason why i haven't started this process YET). i'm going to Hawii in two months, and i guess i am too vain to go through this before i go!

try to stay positive and keep in mind WHY you are doing this. you will also be a good role model for your children regarding food (not restricting like crazy).

good luck to you!

reagentmel

While waiting for whatever appointment you make, you might try balancing carbs and protein to see if insulin resistance plays a part in your struggle. I've recently read "The Insulin Resistance Diet" book, and have begun to balance carbs and protein according to their formula, and am seeing success in measurements (scale still fluctuates, but lower than when I started). I'm using the EM2WL numbers for calories, but balancing carbs and protein to prevent insulin spikes. Maybe that could help you - the book is available on Amazon as an e-book for only about $10, and I have felt really good since starting with the balancing technique. This is not just daily macros, but each meal or snack being balanced with 30 carbs max at any meal, with 14 or more grams of protein to balance. (15 grams carbs needs only 7 grams protein). I think sometimes people who struggle while doing everything right might be having this additional problem.

heybales

Here's a fact on your BodyMedia calorie estimate.

They must calculate your base foundation burn on something.
What were the stats you provided? Age, weight, height.
Yep, BMR. Harris calc BMR at that. The oldest and least accurate, and most inflated when overweight.
It then looks at your temp and adjusts the figure somewhat, but then all daily calories are based on that foundation.

Do you know your best estimate Katch BMR, using weight and bodyfat%.

Many I've seen helping ones are off by 150-300 easily. That means Moderately Active is off by 233-465. That's 1/2 to 1 lb of extra fat each week.
That's beyond the fact jumping to estimated TDEE is some value above actual TDEE you were stalled at. Which could be another 500 cal worth until metabolism decides to speed.

That means the BMF or FitBit for that matter, is overestimating your calorie burns.
Now, for exercise beyond walking and slow jogging it is under-estimating other exercise, but that is what, 3% of your weekly time.
Doesn't really balance it out.

So take the estimated TDEE for a week or month or whatever you got, and see what the avg daily would be.

Daily avg BMF TDEE divided by Harris BMR = multiplier.
Katch BMR times multiplier = adjusted TDEE.

Perhaps that is off by an amount that fits in with observations.

Oh, and don't keep figuring out your TDEE as weight goes up except for the above, since it is based on weight, and you are increasing, your TDEE is going up, and if actually over your real TDEE, you will always be gaining weight. No way out of it.