shy peeps
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I'm shy. Eye contact and a smile go a long way. Just about month ago I was out eating with a friend before going out to a club A guy walked by our table and we smiled at each other. He walked by again on his way back to his table and we smiled again. As my firend and I walked out, he came running out after us and said "I'm really shy, I never do this but you're really cute. I'd love to take you to dinner sometime". We exchanged numbers. He later told me that it was my smile that caught his attention.
I had such a confidence boost and smile the rest of the night. I ended up giving my number out to one other guy.
Just try it. What's the worst that can happen?
Or it could have just been the cleavage.0 -
I am not so much shy as I have anxiety. Put a few drinks in me and I'm a friendly chatterbox, the world is awesome and everyone is interesting, neat and attractive!
The only thing other than that and some medication I have (for what I call "Special occasions") is just.... suck it up and do it. It has never helped me, but I've never regretted saying something - even if I get turned down.
This- I am having drinks now trying to quell anxiety related to friends coming over. The benzos are only for emergency. This is why night time outings work much better- alcohol is usually available at restaurants and smallish music venues.
I've met men during the day at coffee shops and stuff, but I am completely incapable of the eye contact/smile combination. However, I seem to have totally mastered the penetrating "I want you right now" look that lasts about 1/10 of a second followed by a downward look with a little bit of a smile.This totally works! I have been using this sequence since 7th grade!
Sometimes maybe it takes two quick glances and compliment his shoes or something, but meeting men really does not require you to become someone you aren't. (although the I want you look does need to be pretty real-it doesn't have to last long)0 -
hides in corner and raises hand..lol... cant say im shy? maybe i am..dunno.. anywho... can talk just fine and flirt..but can never seem to find a lady that is interested... or if i do try to make contact they act like i am some creepy stalker..lol0
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I'd say I'm shy. But when I really want something, I don't let anything get in my way. Especially something like shyness. So I'm not too worried about it affecting my dating life.0
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However, I don't curse in front of men...I don't think it's very attractive, and since I struggle to get male attention anyway, I don't want to ruin it by dropping F-bombs. I have my awkward moments but they're unintentional. But I just don't swear in front of men.
Very smart Christine. When a women curses, it's horribly, horribly unattractive. I wouldn't hesitate to walk away mid-conversation from a women who dropped an f-bomb.
It generally speaks volumes about their character as well.
I give less than two f*cks about your opinion about anything. Your thinly veiled passive aggressive p*ssy attack here has done nothing but let me know that if I come across you, for any unfortunate reason ever, exactly how I will behave and I will treasure every delicious, brutally crass second of it. Hell you might even come away having learned a few words.
Really,?get off your high horse. Bit dramatic.
Thanks, but he just hates me because I don't suck his sexist, ageist d*ck.0 -
Always, my baby blue eyes get me in more trouble than I can handle. Girls are always smiling in my direction but I can never equate that into anything....0
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However, I don't curse in front of men...I don't think it's very attractive, and since I struggle to get male attention anyway, I don't want to ruin it by dropping F-bombs. I have my awkward moments but they're unintentional. But I just don't swear in front of men.
Very smart Christine. When a women curses, it's horribly, horribly unattractive. I wouldn't hesitate to walk away mid-conversation from a women who dropped an f-bomb.
It generally speaks volumes about their character as well.
I give less than two f*cks about your opinion about anything. Your thinly veiled passive aggressive p*ssy attack here has done nothing but let me know that if I come across you, for any unfortunate reason ever, exactly how I will behave and I will treasure every delicious, brutally crass second of it. Hell you might even come away having learned a few words.
Really,?get off your high horse. Bit dramatic.
Thanks, but he just hates me because I don't suck his sexist, ageist d*ck.
LOL. he wouldn't fair to well with the Aussie girls then either haha.0 -
Tonight as I walked around a few shops, I looked at no one. I don't know why I don't like strangers... everyone is one at some point, but I don't handle it well.Isn't it the worst when an employee asks if you need help finding anything? It makes me want to run away! I would rather spend an extra thirty minutes looking around!Amen, Kit! I usually walk around where they stand and keep my head down, haha... most of them get it, except at Target. I used to work there, I know it's coming, "Can I help you find something?" So I say no before they get it all out, ha!Ugh I hate that too! Soooo much! I was just out at the mall walking around because I needed to see other humans lol and every store I go in to..."can I help you?" The worst is when you go through a store like Macy's and at each counter, they say, "would you like to try our perfume?" "Free makeup sample?" "How about a new purse?"
Or the little kiosks with random stuff in the middle of the mall. I walk with my head down so they don't approach me.
WHAT? I never get approached for free perfume or make-up samples!
I'n gonna file a complaint next time I go to Macy's. Damn sexiest sales ladies. :laugh:
Seriously it's a guy thing, I think. Unless I am actually browsing their area, I rarely get approached and it's never bothered me if they did or didn't.
However, I don't curse in front of men...I don't think it's very attractive, and since I struggle to get male attention anyway, I don't want to ruin it by dropping F-bombs. I have my awkward moments but they're unintentional. But I just don't swear in front of men.Very smart Christine. When a women curses, it's horribly, horribly unattractive. I wouldn't hesitate to walk away mid-conversation from a women who dropped an f-bomb.
It generally speaks volumes about their character as well.I give less than two f*cks about your opinion about anything. Your thinly veiled passive aggressive p*ssy attack here has done nothing but let me know that if I come across you, for any unfortunate reason ever, exactly how I will behave and I will treasure every delicious, brutally crass second of it. Hell you might even come away having learned a few words.
Really,?get off your high horse. Bit dramatic.
Thanks, but he just hates me because I don't suck his sexist, ageist d*ck.
Probably has to do with my mother but a girl cursing doesn't bother me at all. I don't think a girl is less of a lady, unattractive or that her "character" is questionable. My mother is one of those people who will just drop bombs left and right and not care one bit what others may think. 99% of the time in loud Spanish, which just draws more attention from others nearby. :laugh: She's very chatty and outgoing with everyone. As she puts it, I got all of my father's qualities. He's quiet, reserved, takes a while to open up to others while she is the polar opposite. It gives me hope knowing that how my father is, he was able attract someone friendly and outgoing as her, and that I could do the same.My guess is that most of us are to some degree but I also think that due to some influence from this group many are trying to work on that.
Definitely true. I was even thinking tonight when I was going to smile at that guy that it was something some people on Single Peeps might do lol, so I might as well try it. And thanks for the rest of your words Carl, they're sweet!I am not so much shy as I have anxiety. Put a few drinks in me and I'm a friendly chatterbox, the world is awesome and everyone is interesting, neat and attractive!
That would describe me more actually than being shy itself. I have less anxiety with meeting people if I have drinks beforehand.
I love talking to people, and once I meet them and know them, I can, but it is that initial meeting that just drives me nuts.
I'm the same way about drinks. No drinks, I am quiet, and keep to myself. However I get very relaxed, smile a lot, and become very friendly with everyone after a few drinks. This really resonated with me a few weeks back. Outside of MFP, family, co-workers and a few close friends, I don't talk about my weight loss much unless I am asked and even then, I don't offer much in details. At my YMCA I go to frequently, everyone that works there pretty much know me by name. However they don't know about how much I weighed when I started. I joined the Y already well into my weight loss. I pretty much keep to myself about it. I have a FB fan page about it but I don't advertise it or tell friends to tell other friends, etc. etc. I don't know why I am not more open about it. I think sometimes I feel like it's gloating "hey look at me" and I don't want to come across as arrogant, holier than thou attitude.
Anyways every 2 weeks I treat myself to a "cheat meal" at a local pub in my area. Usually a small personal sized pizza with a couple of beers. I'm pretty chummy with the bartender there. He is a huge Star Wars geek. We geek out on that and many other geeky, nerdy things. ½ way through my first beer, I was waiting for my pizza to be done cooking when the bartender brought up the subject of soda pop. He talked about how it was his go to thing while on the clock since he hates coffee and sometimes needed the caffeine boost to get through the day.
He asked what my favorite brand is and I told him I no longer have one and how I quit cold turkey Dec. 2009. He was impressed and at that point, I don't know if it was the beer in me, but I went into detail about my weight loss. I talked about all the medical issues I dealt with, broken ankles, etc etc. I showed him before pics that I have on my cel phone too. He was impressed. Weeks later he says he tells my story to many other people at the bar.
Typing this out made me think about how fitness has really helped with some of my shyness and anxiety issues. Aside from the weight loss, I always feel pretty damn awesome after a workout. I smile to strangers at the Y, become more talkative, a pep in my step. I'm finding the ladies in my Zumba class smiling and waving at me outside of class at the Y quite frequently and that brightens my day. :smooched: I don't know if maybe after a year of going to the class they are feeling more comfortable around me, or maybe they always were smiling and waving at me all this time and since I am just your typical clueless, thick-headed male, I am starting to notice.I'd say I'm shy. But when I really want something, I don't let anything get in my way. Especially something like shyness. So I'm not too worried about it affecting my dating life.
This is me and Zumba. Lots of guys I talk to would NEVER go to a class. Too initimidating with all the women, don't wanna look like a fool infront of them etc etc. Being shy you'd think that I'd be in agreement with them and never want to do such a thing, but no. I really care about my health, weight and fitness levels so my shyness goes out the window. It's never stopped me from attending class or caring what others may think.
For those single/shy peeps that workout, do you feel this way about fitness? I definitely notice it helps me with shyness and anxiety which I know, in time, will eventually translate into dating.0 -
However, I don't curse in front of men...I don't think it's very attractive, and since I struggle to get male attention anyway, I don't want to ruin it by dropping F-bombs. I have my awkward moments but they're unintentional. But I just don't swear in front of men.
Very smart Christine. When a women curses, it's horribly, horribly unattractive. I wouldn't hesitate to walk away mid-conversation from a women who dropped an f-bomb.
It generally speaks volumes about their character as well.
I give less than two f*cks about your opinion about anything. Your thinly veiled passive aggressive p*ssy attack here has done nothing but let me know that if I come across you, for any unfortunate reason ever, exactly how I will behave and I will treasure every delicious, brutally crass second of it. Hell you might even come away having learned a few words.
Really,?get off your high horse. Bit dramatic.
Thanks, but he just hates me because I don't suck his sexist, ageist d*ck.
LOL. he wouldn't fair to well with the Aussie girls then either haha.
Nor Brits!! :laugh:
Kits, I f'ing
you!!! :bigsmile: 0 -
When I was in Dallas a month ago I was determined that despite my mouth full of crooked teeth I was going to smile and say hi to ladies that I found attractive.
Did I think for a second any of them would be swept off their feet...no,and that was the case.
I proved to myself I could do it though and that made me feel a little good.
Woooooo hooooooo!!! I'm loving hearing this!!! :bigsmile: Brilliant Carl, just brilliant!! Smile and the world smiles with you!! :bigsmile:0 -
He's quiet, reserved, takes a while to open up to others while she is the polar opposite. It gives me hope knowing that how my father is, he was able attract someone friendly and outgoing as her, and that I could do the same.
I know quite a few couples with this polar opposite attraction. I would say my first LTR was the same. Him being very outgoing and me being quite reserved.
I've got more outgoing as I've got older. I think he taught me a lot over 12 years. I was quite suppressed as a child so I think the 'real' me took some time to emerge. Also, I think you begin to realise that people dont bite, and most people are just as wary of speaking to strangers (or groups of frends etc) than they portray! I remember asking my best friend about this. He is the most gregarious person I know. But he told me that sometimes he's a bag of nerves inside!!
Christine, sometimes I just force myself to be chatty and outgoing. I think I have nothing to lose. Even if I say something that results in making a fool of myself or some kind of rejection, my pride will be hurt for about 10 seconds. I do still struggle with guys I fancy per se, but I think that's more of a inner confidence issue, than a shy one. Besides, there's nothing wrong with being demure, just as long as it's not holding you back to be the woman you want to be!! :flowerforyou:0 -
Well, I know for a fact that I'm not a "natural" outgoing person. So I will never be one of these people who, regardless of where and when you talk to them, will be uplifting, amazing and will have something interesting to say.
I function mainly in two modes, the "get out of my way" mode for shopping, work, sitting in a coffee shop, transports, etc. where I have no desire whatsoever to interact with people (because I don't want to at this time and because I feel it would be a waste of time to interact - in depth - with random people) and the "most friendly person on earth" mode mostly for night outs, pubs, clubs and social events of all sort (where I generally leave a good impression to people and have all the time in the world to talk to them).
I'm quite happy about that. I've always been a very reserved person though and like to be alone at times.0 -
I give less than two f*cks about your opinion about anything. Your thinly veiled passive aggressive p*ssy attack here has done nothing but let me know that if I come across you, for any unfortunate reason ever, exactly how I will behave and I will treasure every delicious, brutally crass second of it. Hell you might even come away having learned a few words.
:laugh:
I stand by my opinion. Women who curse are unattractive to me.Thanks, but he just hates me because I don't suck his sexist, ageist d*ck.
I could make some shallow, mean comments here (lets face it, you're an easy target), but I'll take the high road.0 -
Well, I know for a fact that I'm not a "natural" outgoing person. So I will never be one of these people who, regardless of where and when you talk to them, will be uplifting, amazing and will have something interesting to say.
I function mainly in two modes, the "get out of my way" mode for shopping, work, sitting in a coffee shop, transports, etc. where I have no desire whatsoever to interact with people (because I don't want to at this time and because I feel it would be a waste of time to interact - in depth - with random people) and the "most friendly person on earth" mode mostly for night outs, pubs, clubs and social events of all sort (where I generally leave a good impression to people and have all the time in the world to talk to them).
I'm quite happy about that. I've always been a very reserved person though and like to be alone at times.
Well for two naturally reserved people we manage to talk the hind legs off a donkey when we meet!!!! :laugh:0 -
Oh yeah! I remember, it was funny to make fun of *all* the MFP single peeps behind their back... MUAHAHAHAHAH! :bigsmile:Well for two naturally reserved people we manage to talk the hind legs off a donkey when we meet!!!! :laugh:0 -
I stand by my opinion. Women who curse are unattractive to me.
Mike, I think we all get the type of woman you're attracted to (100lbs, fake boobs, thigh gap, barbie doll that speaks when she's spoken to) And she doesnt exist on this forum!! So why do you keep imposing your radical preferences on us?
Is it just for attention? Or to provoke an attack? Or do you just like causing offence to women that dont meet your ideals.........??
Seriously, I dont know anyone that would persist in posting in a singles forum where 99% of the opposite sex are abhorrent to them? It's almost masochistic.........
Please enlighten me..........0 -
I stand by my opinion. Women who curse are unattractive to me.
Mike, I think we all get the type of woman you're attracted to (100lbs, fake boobs, thigh gap, barbie doll that speaks when she's spoken to) And she doesnt exist on this forum!! So why do you keep imposing your radical preferences on us?
Is it just for attention? Or to provoke an attack? Or do you just like causing offence to women that dont meet your ideals.........??
Seriously, I dont know anyone that would persist in posting in a singles forum where 99% of the opposite sex are abhorrent to you? It's almost masochistic.........
Please enlighten me..........
Everyone has to have a reason why they are single.
Mike, you just have a whole bunch.0 -
Oh yeah! I remember, it was funny to make fun of *all* the MFP single peeps behind their back... MUAHAHAHAHAH! :bigsmile:Well for two naturally reserved people we manage to talk the hind legs off a donkey when we meet!!!! :laugh:
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: I miss you. What you up to? Skint? I will have to treat you to a couple of bottles of wine at the Cafe soon and catch up on our love lives :bigsmile: :smooched:0 -
I am losing my patience on a lot things here so everyone please stick to discussing the OP.
Thank you.0 -
:noway: Just ignoring the drama...
I am selectively shy. I can generally talk to anyone and can be chatty out in public with people I don't know. But with a relatively attractive, seemingly available and around my age guy...I shut down. I think that's largely because I'm not really ready to pursue anything. Married guys, young guys, old guys...no problem. Women too...I'm not chatty with just men. :laugh:0
