Seems kind of empty in here...
wrathofophelia
Posts: 26
I was hoping I'd have some people to talk to in this group. Child Free is an issue that's very near and dear to me. Does anyone still come around?
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I am here. I actual got in to an augment with my mom on Monday about me not having kids. She thinks I will "change my mind" and "my clock will kick in". I was really mad at my mom for not respecting my decision and harassing me on the issue. Especially because I only talk to my mom once a week and she ruined our phone call. I am 1 of 5 kids ( 4 girls & 1 boy) so it is not like she won’t have grand kids ever.
I ended the conversation on a rude not by telling my mom SHE over populated the earth. LOL she was pissed to say the least.0 -
I check on it, but I've only posted once, I think.
We need more activity!0 -
I'm here...I'm here :drinker:0
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Unfortunately, you'll keep hearing this till people can accept that you're "too old to start now"...(I think I'm finally getting there). People still tell me - at 42 - that I'm not too old though.I am here. I actual got in to an augment with my mom on Monday about me not having kids. She thinks I will "change my mind" and "my clock will kick in". I was really mad at my mom for not respecting my decision and harassing me on the issue. Especially because I only talk to my mom once a week and she ruined our phone call. I am 1 of 5 kids ( 4 girls & 1 boy) so it is not like she won’t have grand kids ever.
I ended the conversation on a rude not by telling my mom SHE over populated the earth. LOL she was pissed to say the least.
Hope your mom accepts it soon though..I'm sure someone will give her some grandkids and she'll relax! :laugh:0 -
I am here. I actual got in to an augment with my mom on Monday about me not having kids. She thinks I will "change my mind" and "my clock will kick in". I was really mad at my mom for not respecting my decision and harassing me on the issue. Especially because I only talk to my mom once a week and she ruined our phone call. I am 1 of 5 kids ( 4 girls & 1 boy) so it is not like she won’t have grand kids ever.
I ended the conversation on a rude not by telling my mom SHE over populated the earth. LOL she was pissed to say the least.
that really sucks! all but my adoptive grandmother have gotten the fact that i'm not having kids. she keeps telling me that i'll change my mind. i just tell her that i'm 31 and my biological clock is SILENT.0 -
Unfortunately, you'll keep hearing this till people can accept that you're "too old to start now"...(I think I'm finally getting there). People still tell me - at 42 - that I'm not too old though.I am here. I actual got in to an augment with my mom on Monday about me not having kids. She thinks I will "change my mind" and "my clock will kick in". I was really mad at my mom for not respecting my decision and harassing me on the issue. Especially because I only talk to my mom once a week and she ruined our phone call. I am 1 of 5 kids ( 4 girls & 1 boy) so it is not like she won’t have grand kids ever.
I ended the conversation on a rude not by telling my mom SHE over populated the earth. LOL she was pissed to say the least.
Hope your mom accepts it soon though..I'm sure someone will give her some grandkids and she'll relax! :laugh:
Yeah at 39 I was hoping people would stop asking now but I still get ooh quick last chance you should go for it now..... errr no thanks :laugh:0 -
:laugh:Yeah at 39 I was hoping people would stop asking now but I still get ooh quick last chance you should go for it now..... errr no thanks :laugh:
The last person I said I was too old to start now to told me "but you don't LOOK like you're 42"....I said "dude...my 'lady parts' don't care how I look...they're just OLD'....:ohwell:0 -
So you ladies are saying I have to deal with this crap for at least another 15+ years? GREAT!. Why can't people just mind their own Vagina's? :explode: :laugh:
Oh well at least I am not the only person being bothered about my none baby making.0 -
well i can at least give you a grain of positivity, i don't get bothered by anyone about being childfree.
i am 36 now but i can't remember being hassled anytime recently in the past few years.
not by my mom, not by my dad, not by my co-workers, and not by any of my friends. i believe the urge to live childfree is hereditary and that my mom and her sisters are childfree by orientation even though 2 of the 4 had kids. (times were different then) i guess my consistency with my beliefs through the years has also helped?
or perhaps since i have always lived in large cities and i'm not married (though very monogamous) has helped too. but i have been in long stable relationships ranging from 5-9 years so i figure i should probably also be getting badgered about marriage. idk.
i have recently started to tell more people that i had my tubes tied. i'm trying to be less secretive about having elective sterilization at 30, so that any other gal who is younger and feels the same way i used to, won't feel so alien or hopefully won't be questioned too harshly and will feel free to do what she wants with her own body and life.0 -
Hi, I'm here~
I had a feeling I'd see a post or two from you in here after I saw your comment in my NaNo group. X3
Awesome! I have always wanted to do this but I feel like being asexual is already enough. Haha. Even so, I want to be sure.i have recently started to tell more people that i had my tubes tied. i'm trying to be less secretive about having elective sterilization at 30, so that any other gal who is younger and feels the same way i used to, won't feel so alien or hopefully won't be questioned too harshly and will feel free to do what she wants with her own body and life.
(Also, I think it's difficult seeing posts because we're all spread out across this public CFBC and the private CFBC group.)0 -
I agree, I actually forgot I was a part of this group!!! I hate how people with children act like the world revolves around them, preferential treatment in the work place. How is it that my life choice to be childless should be impacted by people that have children. Makes me crazy going to the gym, there's a family change room, but there's like 40 small children running around screaming. My gym is a multi-plex which is best fit for multiple activities, but boy do I miss the quiet of the adults only gym.0
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....and then there is (queue the 'doom music)......TAX TIME!!
Who else got screwed over for being dual income, no kids this year???0 -
Hi!
Am I the only one that is single and dating and keeps finding myself thinking 'all the good ones want or have kids'? Or struggling with the temptation to compromise just to be with someone that doesn't want kids?
And anyone that wants to get an idea of our society's priorities go to the library and look for books on deciding whether or not to have kids. It might be better now but a few years ago I found only one book amidst a wall of titles that clearly assumed readers already wanted kids.
I'll close with a horribly bad joke:
Why did the woman not want kids?
Because she was allergic to goats!0 -
I still stop by now and then. I am still not sad we don't have kids. I am amazed by how much time my friends with kids devote to only talking about their kids. It is like the moms don't exist outside of being a parent. I am in a small group for personal training at the gym. this morning I had almost nothing to add to the conversation because it was all about their kids. Seems kind of rude to me.0
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OMG the taxes yes!! I still struggle to wrap my mind around why there are so many subsidies and tax breaks around child care, child tax benefit, how bout that montly cheque Mom's get, child allowance? Are you freaking kidding me? How 'bout the "I provide no additional burden on society" allowance. An "I work full time and pay my bills and taxes all by myself without aid" tax break - that would be lovely. The yearly assessment portion of our city taxes for our home shows a portion of our taxes are allotted to pay for the school that we don't send a child to. What now? How's that right?
Recently our City built a Multiplex, if sports a huge pool split between lanes and play deep end, a separate shallow pool, a play center, a dual gymnasium, weight room, racketball courts, a running track, slides, dive tank, windy river, two hot tubs one for families and one for adults (I use the term adult loosely since it's usually full of teenagers, lol) saunas, and a Play water park. It's quite the amazing structure and a great addition to our city. It's full capacity all of the time. The standard drop in rate for most gym's I've been to is about $10. The Multiplex here has a drop in rate of $10.25 for an adult, and for kids is $5.25 (kids under 3 are free) totally reasonable price IMO. You would not believe the commotion that went down when it first opened, facebook rantings and crazed parents in distress that it was too expensive to take their kids. Demanding that families get special pricing. I was furious. It was bad enough that I had to dodge the little monsters when I was in the change rooms, tripping over them on the track ( bigger commotion when the place banned children under 13 on the running track - my happiest day) But seriously, you decided to have 5 kids and have a hard time paying for their entertainment? Maybe you should have re-thought your life planning choices. Birth control is $13 a month. Seems like an easy choice. The center does offer subsidy for lower income families. If you don't fall into category of lower income family, but simply had too many kids to be able to afford the $5.25 a head plus yourself, or say in the instance of two parents and 1 kid... $25 is not too shabby for a fun day to use whatever venue you wish. They wanted the childcare at the gym to be free too.... cuz they pay taxes. My taxes go to schools and subsidize daycare. Go figure.0 -
Hi!
Am I the only one that is single and dating and keeps finding myself thinking 'all the good ones want or have kids'? Or struggling with the temptation to compromise just to be with someone that doesn't want kids?
Don't compromise just to be with someone that doesn't want kids... that would be worse... that would be letting them win!! lmao - jk
There have got to be other ladies out there that feel the same as you do, you just have to be patient.0 -
Yes, yes, yes.....we say all of these things all the time... Its so frustrating, because we pay so much more, and barely get any deductions (except the house, which doesn't do that much). Payng taxes on the things we'll never utilize, and watching people get huge returns just because they have children makes me crazy. The only consolation is that we don't have to raise kids, and listen to them scream in our own homes (just have to hear that in every store, restaurant and even bars these days!)OMG the taxes yes!! I still struggle to wrap my mind around why there are so many subsidies and tax breaks around child care, child tax benefit, how bout that montly cheque Mom's get, child allowance? Are you freaking kidding me? How 'bout the "I provide no additional burden on society" allowance. An "I work full time and pay my bills and taxes all by myself without aid" tax break - that would be lovely. The yearly assessment portion of our city taxes for our home shows a portion of our taxes are allotted to pay for the school that we don't send a child to. What now? How's that right?
Recently our City built a Multiplex, if sports a huge pool split between lanes and play deep end, a separate shallow pool, a play center, a dual gymnasium, weight room, racketball courts, a running track, slides, dive tank, windy river, two hot tubs one for families and one for adults (I use the term adult loosely since it's usually full of teenagers, lol) saunas, and a Play water park. It's quite the amazing structure and a great addition to our city. It's full capacity all of the time. The standard drop in rate for most gym's I've been to is about $10. The Multiplex here has a drop in rate of $10.25 for an adult, and for kids is $5.25 (kids under 3 are free) totally reasonable price IMO. You would not believe the commotion that went down when it first opened, facebook rantings and crazed parents in distress that it was too expensive to take their kids. Demanding that families get special pricing. I was furious. It was bad enough that I had to dodge the little monsters when I was in the change rooms, tripping over them on the track ( bigger commotion when the place banned children under 13 on the running track - my happiest day) But seriously, you decided to have 5 kids and have a hard time paying for their entertainment? Maybe you should have re-thought your life planning choices. Birth control is $13 a month. Seems like an easy choice. The center does offer subsidy for lower income families. If you don't fall into category of lower income family, but simply had too many kids to be able to afford the $5.25 a head plus yourself, or say in the instance of two parents and 1 kid... $25 is not too shabby for a fun day to use whatever venue you wish. They wanted the childcare at the gym to be free too.... cuz they pay taxes. My taxes go to schools and subsidize daycare. Go figure.
ETA....Speaking of Facebook, there's a page called STFU Parents that is absolutely hilarious! They repost (with names blocked out) people's oversharing or ridiculous rants about their kids....its very entertaining!!0 -
I agree, I actually forgot I was a part of this group!!! I hate how people with children act like the world revolves around them, preferential treatment in the work place. How is it that my life choice to be childless should be impacted by people that have children. Makes me crazy going to the gym, there's a family change room, but there's like 40 small children running around screaming. My gym is a multi-plex which is best fit for multiple activities, but boy do I miss the quiet of the adults only gym.
Arggh I know what you mean! I get really irritated at work with parents I agree there is a certain amount of legal requirements but failure to use adequate contraception does not give you priority over me to book holidays etc.!0 -
[/quote] The only consolation is that we don't have to raise kids, and listen to them scream in our own homes (just have to hear that in every store, restaurant and even bars these days!)
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Absolutely!! Haha, I will definitely look up that FB group too, sounds funny0 -
I'm here!
I don't check the boards a whole lot, but feel free to message or friend me! 0 -
I'm almost 34 and it seems my side of the family, our friends, and our colleagues all accept it. My husband's side of the family doesn't get it though and they still think we'll change our minds even though were 34 and 37 years old. I find it disrespectful that people will actually argue with you over a personal choice.0
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I'm almost 34 and it seems my side of the family, our friends, and our colleagues all accept it. My husband's side of the family doesn't get it though and they still think we'll change our minds even though were 34 and 37 years old. I find it disrespectful that people will actually argue with you over a personal choice.
I like how people actually get mad like really angry at something that is your choice and about your body and life. It is not a bad choice! I feel like you are making a better choice for the children, because if you had children and you were not happy about it (for whatever your reason may be) what kind of Mother would you be? Would you still be able to be the best Mother for that child? I think all these people should turn their anger to the people who have kids and don’t want them they are the ones making the bad choice, and will not be the best parent.0 -
I had forgotten about this thread.... sorry folks. **waves hand** Still here. Hope all are happy and well..... and still childless! :drinker:0
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I have never regretted not having kids....but once you ***** and moan for a few sessions you realize this is not the thing that defines you, hence I am not very active here but we are around - lurking 0
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I'm here now! I just changed jobs not to long ago and now I have to reestablish that I will never have babies....0
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Sorta what I see everytime I see a baby.... http://firsttoknow.com/devil-baby-prank-gives-new-yorkers-scare-lifetime/
Spent time with the neices and nephews at Christmas and had spent a particular amount with the one boy.... like patience of Job style, it's the most time I've spent with any of the kids, I was really trying, cuz usually I'm all hiding from them... and my Mother In Law came up and whispered "You should have had 10 of them" - I laughed... but honestly the thought of having one makes me want to curl into the fetal position.0 -
Unfortunately, you'll keep hearing this till people can accept that you're "too old to start now"...(I think I'm finally getting there). People still tell me - at 42 - that I'm not too old though.I am here. I actual got in to an augment with my mom on Monday about me not having kids. She thinks I will "change my mind" and "my clock will kick in". I was really mad at my mom for not respecting my decision and harassing me on the issue. Especially because I only talk to my mom once a week and she ruined our phone call. I am 1 of 5 kids ( 4 girls & 1 boy) so it is not like she won’t have grand kids ever.
I ended the conversation on a rude not by telling my mom SHE over populated the earth. LOL she was pissed to say the least.
Hope your mom accepts it soon though..I'm sure someone will give her some grandkids and she'll relax! :laugh:
LOL - I keep hoping I've hit the magical age when people give up the hope... I'm 37 and there's still the odd one that says some story of how their sister's friend of somebody or other had a baby at 38, or 40, 42 or some age that still somehow makes them hold hope that I would change my mind. I know one woman who had her first at 38, he was born with Down Syndrome, and had little girl two years later - her life is awful, she spends her time juggling two young children, one of which requires so very much extra time and attention and money and classes, her and her husband haven't had sex in 4 years, they actually don't speak to each other more than necessary. When he comes home she goes downstairs, he goes through the 2 + hour task of trying to get the special needs child to sleep, and the Woman locks herself in the basement sewing all night. I can only assume to try to get her sanity back. She goes to bed at 4am and sleeps for 4hours before her life of misery begins again. Not exactly a poster for wanting to have kids at my age.0 -
I kind of forgot about this group but will try to check in more often. I've been lucky enough that no one really bothers me about not having kids. People ask and I just say we don't want them and most people don't push. Our parents never really ask and have said it's our decision and they are fine with whatever we decide.0
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I want one of these devil babies so bad for my next Halloween party!Sorta what I see everytime I see a baby.... http://firsttoknow.com/devil-baby-prank-gives-new-yorkers-scare-lifetime/0 -
Just found this place. Woohoo! So happy to find others like me. I gets so irritated when people (especially friends and family) tell me I'll change my mind one day. Thankfully, my parents are supportive of my decision to live my life with or without children.0
