We are pleased to announce that as of March 4, 2025, an updated Rich Text Editor has been introduced in the MyFitnessPal Community. To learn more about the changes, please click here. We look forward to sharing this new feature with you!
Made a date for this weekend
Replies
-
Im too scared about my own faults and shortcomings to spend the time before a date sure about the guy and thinking nothing but positive things about him. Until the moment we are standing in front of each other - i have to to do everything possible to build my own self up and get ready and put myself in a state of mind that he will enjoy -
Ive never been fully engaged in any date before date 10 - I was always about to cancel.0 -
I only said to go because in my own personal experience, I find every excuse to get out of an position that makes me nervous. At the time that I agreed to it I told myself it would be fun, then as time goes on I doubt myself, which is probably why Jennifer came here and asked what she should do. I felt Jennifer was trying to get out of the date not because she didn't like the guy, but because of personal insecurities. Because us ladies are known to do that...
First dates are NERVE RACKING. But if you go into know realizing you are on equal playing fields and no one has anything to prove and you go and just have fun and meet someone new, then it's not so bad. I think women in general tend to build up dates as something they need to "win". Which in turn makes us nervous. Which in turn makes us want to sit at home under a blanket on our couches and drown our sorrows in Ben and Jerrys (which is probably why I needed to lose those 45 pounds in the first place...:laugh:0 -
I'm amazed that I was the only one to say cancel. It is my preference that a woman who is not fully engaged and thinking positive thoughts about me cancel.
I think she will be fine if she goes. I'm part of the group that always wants to cancel for various reasons, however when I get there and the date is underway everything turns out just fine and is fun. I just think it's pregame jitters and maybe she is looking for reasons to cancel. I say go and make the judgements after meeting him.0 -
Im too scared about my own faults and shortcomings to spend the time before a date sure about the guy and thinking nothing but positive things about him. Until the moment we are standing in front of each other - i have to to do everything possible to build my own self up and get ready and put myself in a state of mind that he will enjoy -
Ive never been fully engaged in any date before date 10 - I was always about to cancel.
The funny thing is, really women I would argue have a bit of advantage in this department.
Most of the time I only consider 2 types of personalities, as completely disqualifying.
1) You are crazy.
2) You want to spend my money. (I don't mean for the date, I mean you try and get me to spend
my money on random things throughout the date, or make it known you love to be "spoiled"
in a financial sense)
While I don't speak for all guys, I myself know that I am VERY lenient when it comes to personalities.
If you collect bugs in your spare time (LOL) I will not hold that against you, or consider that creepy.
I look at most personalities as pluses or minuses.
So really, if you have been honest with the person with your physical appearance, or we have
already seen you you (as a woman) are generally in.
EDIT: I am reading this may look as if I am highjacking the thread that isn't my intention.
I just know that men are usually forgiving on personality, so being concerned with your
own "shortcomings" is interesting to me.0 -
This isn't even for dates but just going out in general. I have many times not felt like going but once I got there had fun and was very happy I went.
I agree sometimes I go through this but once I'm there I thrive! I always get a little nervous before a first date and want to back out.
It is dinner. I see him around school a lot. He is from DSS and comes in to interview students etc. We chat a little bit while he is waiting for the kids to come down .. he says .. you know, you have beautiful eyes .. and you are such a sweet and funny person.. we should do something sometime .. I freeze and everything in me wants to hurl .. I say ha ha! thanks .. and yeah, we should! Kid comes down, he leaves and I feel relief that I got out of that. Then he comes BACK in after talking to the kid, which he never did before .. and says .. so about that date .. GAH!!!! I don't even know how old he is!!0 -
Frankly, it's easier to text him today to cancel than try and turn down date 2 when you actually meet him...speaking from true experience.0
-
This isn't even for dates but just going out in general. I have many times not felt like going but once I got there had fun and was very happy I went.
I agree sometimes I go through this but once I'm there I thrive! I always get a little nervous before a first date and want to back out.
It is dinner. I see him around school a lot. He is from DSS and comes in to interview students etc. We chat a little bit while he is waiting for the kids to come down .. he says .. you know, you have beautiful eyes .. and you are such a sweet and funny person.. we should do something sometime .. I freeze and everything in me wants to hurl .. I say ha ha! thanks .. and yeah, we should! Kid comes down, he leaves and I feel relief that I got out of that. Then he comes BACK in after talking to the kid, which he never did before .. and says .. so about that date .. GAH!!!! I don't even know how old he is!!
Is that a good hurl like you are just nervous or a disgusted hurl? haha
Do you think he's younger than you?0 -
Frankly, it's easier to text him today to cancel than try and turn down date 2 when you actually meet him...speaking from true experience.
I only speak from untrue experiences
:laugh: 0 -
This isn't even for dates but just going out in general. I have many times not felt like going but once I got there had fun and was very happy I went.
I agree sometimes I go through this but once I'm there I thrive! I always get a little nervous before a first date and want to back out.
It is dinner. I see him around school a lot. He is from DSS and comes in to interview students etc. We chat a little bit while he is waiting for the kids to come down .. he says .. you know, you have beautiful eyes .. and you are such a sweet and funny person.. we should do something sometime .. I freeze and everything in me wants to hurl .. I say ha ha! thanks .. and yeah, we should! Kid comes down, he leaves and I feel relief that I got out of that. Then he comes BACK in after talking to the kid, which he never did before .. and says .. so about that date .. GAH!!!! I don't even know how old he is!!
So... wait, you actually don't like the guy but you still agreed to go on a date and give him your number? I might not be understanding properly0 -
Frankly, it's easier to text him today to cancel than try and turn down date 2 when you actually meet him...speaking from true experience.
Christine, You know how everyone - but Carl especially - is always telling you to step out of your comfort zone? This is one of those cases where if you're ever in this situation, please just take a step back and a deep breath and just go . You never know what might happen. :flowerforyou:
I totally agree that it's insecurities and pre-date nerves in this case. It will either be a good date or a bad date, but in the end it will be worth it as practice.0 -
I find every excuse to get out of an position that makes me nervous.
Yup.
He is very nice, good with the kids. Obviously has a stable job. I don't know.. I suck. lol0 -
Frankly, it's easier to text him today to cancel than try and turn down date 2 when you actually meet him...speaking from true experience.
Christine, You know how everyone - but Carl especially - is always telling you to step out of your comfort zone? This is one of those cases where if you're ever in this situation, please just take a step back and a deep breath and just go . You never know what might happen. :flowerforyou:
I totally agree that it's insecurities and pre-date nerves in this case. It will either be a good date or a bad date, but in the end it will be worth it as practice.
Sometimes, I do agree with stepping out of your comfort zone. I do it on occasion and sometimes it works and sometimes I crash and burn!
But in this situation, I don't think it is worth him if you already don't really like him. I wouldn't go on the date if I have no interest in him. It is very hard and awkward to turn down a second date though if the man offers if you are a naturally shy/awkward person, and plus, how would you feel if someone was going on a date just to humor you?0 -
Frankly, it's easier to text him today to cancel than try and turn down date 2 when you actually meet him...speaking from true experience.
Christine, You know how everyone - but Carl especially - is always telling you to step out of your comfort zone? This is one of those cases where if you're ever in this situation, please just take a step back and a deep breath and just go . You never know what might happen. :flowerforyou:
I totally agree that it's insecurities and pre-date nerves in this case. It will either be a good date or a bad date, but in the end it will be worth it as practice.
Sometimes, I do agree with stepping out of your comfort zone. I do it on occasion and sometimes it works and sometimes I crash and burn!
But in this situation, I don't think it is worth him if you already don't really like him. I wouldn't go on the date if I have no interest in him. It is very hard and awkward to turn down a second date though if the man offers if you are a naturally shy/awkward person, and plus, how would you feel if someone was going on a date just to humor you?
Oh, more information.
Yeah if you are not feeling any sort of attraction, then going would be a bad idea.
I assumed you were.0 -
I find every excuse to get out of an position that makes me nervous.
Yup.
He is very nice, good with the kids. Obviously has a stable job. I don't know.. I suck. lol
You don't suck. You are a girl. He sounds like a truly nice guy that's obviously interested in getting to know you. And why wouldn't he? Give him the benefit of the doubt and go have a meal with the guy...0 -
I find every excuse to get out of an position that makes me nervous.
Yup.
He is very nice, good with the kids. Obviously has a stable job. I don't know.
Sounds to me like you actually do kinda like him... but thinking about your other post the other day, maybe you don't feel good enough? If that's true remember that he wouldn't ask you out if you weren't good enough. We think people can't see our faults, but often they see them looooong before we realize them about ourselves! So if he's liking you, set your doubts aside and go have fun. And if you start to freak out, just try not to do it in front of him... save the freak out for when you can get a computer and tell us all about it :bigsmile:0 -
Frankly, it's easier to text him today to cancel than try and turn down date 2 when you actually meet him...speaking from true experience.
Christine, You know how everyone - but Carl especially - is always telling you to step out of your comfort zone? This is one of those cases where if you're ever in this situation, please just take a step back and a deep breath and just go . You never know what might happen. :flowerforyou:
I totally agree that it's insecurities and pre-date nerves in this case. It will either be a good date or a bad date, but in the end it will be worth it as practice.
Sometimes, I do agree with stepping out of your comfort zone. I do it on occasion and sometimes it works and sometimes I crash and burn!
But in this situation, I don't think it is worth him if you already don't really like him. I wouldn't go on the date if I have no interest in him. It is very hard and awkward to turn down a second date though if the man offers if you are a naturally shy/awkward person, and plus, how would you feel if someone was going on a date just to humor you?
Fair enough... but I didn't get the impression she didn't like him. Just that she had nerves about the date.0 -
No it was more of a .. oh **** hurl .. not a disgusted hurl. He is very cute and very muscley .. we have chatted for like a year, since he took over this district. But for a few minutes at a time .. maybe up to 15 minutes or so. I guess I just never thought about dating him. Not because he wasn't cute or I didn't like him ... I just met him last school year and then I was dating someone else the second half of last school year .. so it just never crossed my mind.
I have only recently started dating again after my divorce and the first guy I dated, I got into a relationship with. So .. maybe that is it .. maybe I am afraid of a relationship..lol.0 -
I'm amazed that I was the only one to say cancel. It is my preference that a woman who is not fully engaged and thinking positive thoughts about me cancel.
i understand what you're saying but it's just a first date. i think far too many people expect to be completely wowed by their date before they even have the first date.
most of my best first dates have come from when i've been sorta "mheh" about the guy and the experience.0 -
No it was more of a .. oh **** hurl .. not a disgusted hurl. He is very cute and very muscley .. we have chatted for like a year, since he took over this district. But for a few minutes at a time .. maybe up to 15 minutes or so. I guess I just never thought about dating him. Not because he wasn't cute or I didn't like him ... I just met him last school year and then I was dating someone else the second half of last school year .. so it just never crossed my mind.
I have only recently started dating again after my divorce and the first guy I dated, I got into a relationship with. So .. maybe that is it .. maybe I am afraid of a relationship..lol.
Ah, okay, I thought you had no interest in him.
If it's just nerves, I say go then! But if you don't like a person, then don't go.0 -
Oh, more information.
Yeah if you are not feeling any sort of attraction, then going would be a bad idea.
I assumed you were.
I think you are confusing posters .. lol .. I find him very attractive. He is very cute.
Sounds to me like you actually do kinda like him... but thinking about your other post the other day, maybe you don't feel good enough? If that's true remember that he wouldn't ask you out if you weren't good enough. We think people can't see our faults, but often they see them looooong before we realize them about ourselves! So if he's liking you, set your doubts aside and go have fun. And if you start to freak out, just try not to do it in front of him... save the freak out for when you can get a computer and tell us all about it
LOL .. I will bring my freak out right here! I am very nervous .. and it is only Wednesday.0 -
I have only recently started dating again after my divorce and the first guy I dated, I got into a relationship with. So .. maybe that is it .. maybe I am afraid of a relationship..lol.
Dating is terrifying, I totally get it and felt the way you do months ago when I started. Thought I was gonna puke on the very first date I went on, but I got through it and now it's not so scary anymore. Just go and have fun! If nothing else, at least you sort of know this guy already!0 -
If nothing else, at least you sort of know this guy already!
No kidding.....There will be a sense of familiarity there that the "online" daters don't have!! You guys know each other already and are on friendly terms. Have fun!0 -
Read the whole thing and I think it's awesome, jenn! You've totally got yourself a sweet first date lined up. Since you know he's not a creepo, why don't you ask him to pick you up for the date so you can have 2-3 drinks to calm yourself down? :P
DEFINITELY go.0 -
Oh, you sooooooooo have to go on this date! You'll have fun, I'm sure!No it was more of a .. oh **** hurl .. not a disgusted hurl. He is very cute and very muscley .. we have chatted for like a year, since he took over this district. But for a few minutes at a time .. maybe up to 15 minutes or so. I guess I just never thought about dating him. Not because he wasn't cute or I didn't like him ... I just met him last school year and then I was dating someone else the second half of last school year .. so it just never crossed my mind.
I have only recently started dating again after my divorce and the first guy I dated, I got into a relationship with. So .. maybe that is it .. maybe I am afraid of a relationship..lol.
The first guy I dated after my divorce was a first meet from eH and I thought I would puke too. I was going absolutely crazy right before it. When the date was over, I had to go for a run to burn off all the nervous energy and to calm down. I decided not to see him again, but it was still exciting in a nauseating sort of way. You have to push past the nerves and put yourself out there, and this guy sounds like he could be keeper material already!0 -
But now I don't want to go. Do I cancel or I do I suck it up and go. I just don't feel like dating.
Not to mention it annoys the heck out of me that he spells things wrong in his text messages .. lol.
I would go out with him because it does hurt when people back out on you. If you don't feel like dating, I would stop completely after this date until you decide you want to go back out there.
And come on.. his spelling mistakes on his texts annoys you? I thought I was particular about things! lol
I've done the same thing. I cannot tolerate bad spelling in a text. It drives me insane.0 -
go on the date! If you like him great, If not now you know! I understand the spelling thing though. We are twins.0
-
go on the date! If you like him great, If not now you know! I understand the spelling thing though. We are twins.
spelling wrong in a text is not the end of the world....its not like hes writting a ten page paper to you....lol
definately go on the date..you may find your knight in shining armour!!!0 -
go on the date! If you like him great, If not now you know! I understand the spelling thing though. We are twins.
Same here, really really bothers me.0 -
Ditto for me, but now that I'm seeing someone who is ESL, I have to just let it go completely!go on the date! If you like him great, If not now you know! I understand the spelling thing though. We are twins.
Same here, really really bothers me.
0 -
I find him very attractive. He is very cute.
OMG! What !!!!!!!!!!! Why are you sitting on this forum then? Go out and buy new shoes for the date!!!!
And new underwear! :bigsmile:0
This discussion has been closed.