How long should the "swoon" last?
Carl01
Posts: 9,307 Member
Stolen from here...
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/785864-too-good-looking
Think it is interesting to see how long folks have it last,want it to last and also curious if it becomes so intoxicating for lack of a better word that some pursue it relentlessly at the sacrifice of a serious relationship developing.
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/785864-too-good-looking
Think it is interesting to see how long folks have it last,want it to last and also curious if it becomes so intoxicating for lack of a better word that some pursue it relentlessly at the sacrifice of a serious relationship developing.
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i didn't read the thread, but there is info out there that states the chemical connection we create with those we fall in love with ends at the two year mark. so, by that time the love has to be something more than simple swooning... :-)0
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I think it goes through phases. I've gone through two swoons with SL so far. Initially and up to when I said I love you.. then it kinda died down in the months after that until he finally said it back. Now I'm swooning again.
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I think it comes and goes. All relationships cycle up and down. At least they do in my personal experience. For me, that initial "swoon" tends to last for quite some time. Once Im hooked, Im hooked. If I start to feel unappreciated that feeling tends to fade. But a sweet or romatic gesture on his part, a kind word, or an especially passionte kiss is all it takes to get my "swoon" going on again!0
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Not very long.
I think you are initially attracted to someone because you feel an intense, sexual attraction...that is why new couples are always hanging off each other and busy in bed. But once you get to know the person, you care about them not sex or looks so much.0 -
I'm into my 6th year of swooning over someone..........but we're not together anymore, so I guess that's a bit of a false swoon
TBH I dont think it ever ends if I'm mad about someone......... 0 -
I think it comes and goes. All relationships cycle up and down. At least they do in my personal experience. For me, that initial "swoon" tends to last for quite some time. Once Im hooked, Im hooked. If I start to feel unappreciated that feeling tends to fade. But a sweet or romatic gesture on his part, a kind word, or an especially passionte kiss is all it takes to get my "swoon" going on again!
Yep, exactly this! For me, anywho.0 -
A lifetime.0
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AwwwwwwA lifetime.
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Yes, relationships go through phases, but if you stop swooning at all, what's the point of being with the other person?0
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If you continue to flirt with your partner, make them feel sexy, and you are sexy for THEM, and you still go on "dates", you still enjoy each other's company, still make each other laugh.... as comedian Ron White would say, it should last
FOOOOOOORRRRREVAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Basically, it lasts as long as you BOTH want it to. It definitely isn't a one-way street....0 -
A lifetime.
this.it doesnt have to be a daily thing, but i'd think if people aren't taking each other for granted, still being flirty and still attracted to the other the swoon could happen forever0 -
Chemically speaking, 12-18 months.0
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I'm into my 6th year of swooning over someone..........but we're not together anymore, so I guess that's a bit of a false swoon
I feel you there. I think there is something to the whole "wanting what we cannot have" thing. I'm suspicious that these would probably fade if attained though.0 -
When I met my husband.. I fell head over heels for him from day one. I loved him no matter what happened.. so my swoon ended for him after he cheated on me the first time. I think when you meet the love of your life you swoon over them always.0
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I'm into my 6th year of swooning over someone..........but we're not together anymore, so I guess that's a bit of a false swoon
I feel you there. I think there is something to the whole "wanting what we cannot have" thing. I'm suspicious that these would probably fade if attained though.
Yeah, that may well be the case, but I wouldn't mind finding out! If I ever do, I'll let you know
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I'm into my 6th year of swooning over someone..........but we're not together anymore, so I guess that's a bit of a false swoon
TBH I dont think it ever ends if I'm mad about someone.........
Ditto that...
When I'm in love I'm kind of in this... constant state. The first boyfriend I remember very clearly when that changed - it was a very dramatic event that changed my entire perception of who he was as a person and finally allowed me to see who he really was. It made it almost easy to extricate him from my life despite us living together.
So for me? The swooning ends at betrayal or death.0 -
I am thinking I did not word or explain what I intended in keeping with what I perceived was the discussion on the other thread.
What I was taking from that discussion was not an issue of love but that giddy euphoria which happens with the first blushes of an infatuation.
That time when a person refuses to look at life and reality under the belief that the feeling of "love" they have will overcome all regardless of what living actually entails.0 -
I am thinking I did not word or explain what I intended in keeping with what I perceived was the discussion on the other thread.
What I was taking from that discussion was not an issue of love but that giddy euphoria which happens with the first blushes of an infatuation.
That time when a person refuses to look at life and reality under the belief that the feeling of "love" they have will overcome all regardless of what living actually entails.
I honestly don't know the difference then. Unless there's a disagreement I'm usually pretty swoony when I'm in love. But I don't know if I've been in a long enough relationship to really have gotten to the "settled" part.0 -
I am thinking I did not word or explain what I intended in keeping with what I perceived was the discussion on the other thread.
What I was taking from that discussion was not an issue of love but that giddy euphoria which happens with the first blushes of an infatuation.
That time when a person refuses to look at life and reality under the belief that the feeling of "love" they have will overcome all regardless of what living actually entails.
I honestly don't know the difference then. Unless there's a disagreement I'm usually pretty swoony when I'm in love. But I don't know if I've been in a long enough relationship to really have gotten to the "settled" part.
The love will fix everything ideal...where 2 unemployed people will swear that just being together will be enough even though that doesn`t explain where groceries come from.
Yes I know that is an exaggeration but the idea.
More realistic perhaps is where every meeting is a rush,Christmas morning all over but no thought given to actually living together and dealing with lifes stresses as well as those that occur with being together.0 -
my great grandparents were married for like 60 years . my great grand dad said he'd get that infatuated swoony feeling all the way until she died several years before he did.
who says infatuation has to completely end just because the relationship becomes more long terms and settled?0 -
I am thinking I did not word or explain what I intended in keeping with what I perceived was the discussion on the other thread.
What I was taking from that discussion was not an issue of love but that giddy euphoria which happens with the first blushes of an infatuation.
That time when a person refuses to look at life and reality under the belief that the feeling of "love" they have will overcome all regardless of what living actually entails.
I honestly don't know the difference then. Unless there's a disagreement I'm usually pretty swoony when I'm in love. But I don't know if I've been in a long enough relationship to really have gotten to the "settled" part.
The love will fix everything ideal...where 2 unemployed people will swear that just being together will be enough even though that doesn`t explain where groceries come from.
Yes I know that is an exaggeration but the idea.
More realistic perhaps is where every meeting is a rush,Christmas morning all over but no thought given to actually living together and dealing with lifes stresses as well as those that occur with being together.
Oh, then never. I don't believe in that at all. Denying hardship because you're in love and that's all that matters is stupid.0 -
My swoons last 2 weeks. Max.
I find the real world and real world stress get in the way of the "butterflies". Working long hours, paying a mortgage, and dealing with day-to-day drama really takes the wind out of my sails when it comes to swooning over a partner.0 -
I think when the swoony part is over .. your relationship is over. When you are with someone you are supposed to be with you will always swoon over them.
When you are in a relationship that will eventually end .. the swooning ends after about 4-6 months. That is when you know you are in trouble. lol.
I agree that swooning ends when you are really in love only when a betrayal happens.
Even when real life kicks in and you are sharing bills and messes and kids .. whatever .. you will have days that you don't swoon over them .. but it takes very little for the right person to get you back on the swoon path. When you are with someone who is not your person .. each act of non =swoonworthy material will chip away at your relationship and you will get less and less enthralled with them until it eventually ends.0 -
My swoons last 2 weeks. Max.
I find the real world and real world stress get in the way of the "butterflies". Working long hours, paying a mortgage, and dealing with day-to-day drama really takes the wind out of my sails when it comes to swooning over a partner.
I think that is because you weren't in the kind of love that would last a lifetime. I am not sure you have ever felt that kind of love.
Or perhaps it is a man thing.0 -
my great grandparents were married for like 60 years . my great grand dad said he'd get that infatuated swoony feeling all the way until she died several years before he did.
who says infatuation has to completely end just because the relationship becomes more long terms and settled?
Awww maaan, that's proper love. That's the kind of love I want again
I agree with Mesha, Jen, Kits, life does not get in the way of swoon!! You deal with life and stress and worry and strife, but the reason you smile at your partner when you're sitting on the floor in the middle of winter, eating beans when the heating just packed up, is because of the swoon!! That moment of swoon makes it all worthwhile 0 -
Or perhaps it is a man thing.
This.0 -
Or perhaps it is a man thing.
This.
Sad commentary.
Luckily I have a lot of friends and family that have had long-term relationships and marriages so I know true happiness is out there. It's not easy and takes work, but if you're not willing to "swoon" for more than two weeks or try in a relationship - ever - you will just be alone....
Truth.0 -
My swoons last 2 weeks. Max.
I find the real world and real world stress get in the way of the "butterflies". Working long hours, paying a mortgage, and dealing with day-to-day drama really takes the wind out of my sails when it comes to swooning over a partner.
I totally get this mentality.
I like swoons to last because I like the situation to be that when a woman and I are together, nothing else matter. I'm very good at being in the moment.
I like relationships to be the cocoon from the day to day nonsense. A ecosystem of fun, trust, warmth, love, etc. An ideal relationship solves a problem, not causes additional stresses.
That's how I swoon.0 -
I like swoons to last because I like the situation to be that when a woman and I are together, nothing else matter. I'm very good at being in the moment.
I like relationships to be the cocoon from the day to day nonsense. A ecosystem of fun, trust, warmth, love, etc. An ideal relationship solves a problem, not causes additional stresses.
That's how I swoon.
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww Now you're making me swoon DM!! :flowerforyou: 0 -
My swoons last 2 weeks. Max.
I find the real world and real world stress get in the way of the "butterflies". Working long hours, paying a mortgage, and dealing with day-to-day drama really takes the wind out of my sails when it comes to swooning over a partner.
I totally get this mentality.
I like swoons to last because I like the situation to be that when a woman and I are together, nothing else matter. I'm very good at being in the moment.
I like relationships to be the cocoon from the day to day nonsense. A ecosystem of fun, trust, warmth, love, etc. An ideal relationship solves a problem, not causes additional stresses.
That's how I swoon.
I see Mike's point and DM1983z point as well. There will be ups and downs. Life is not a freakin' Disney fairy tale. Swoons won't be 24/7/365.0
