A man and his bathroom...

afv417

Men- you are 30, own your own home but do not keep it up. How would you feel/react if the girl you are dating mentions the cleanliness of your bathroom? Like so: "Can I help you clean your bathroom?" (I couldn't get myself to ask him to clean it himself:ohwell: )

His response was- "I'm sorry, I didn't realize it was that bad. I can clean it." I thanked him and felt appreciated. I was actually cleaning up my dishes and cleaned the kitchen while I was at it. He was thankful. When I went to shower the bathroom was half clean...:indifferent:

Thoughts? Women, please chime in too. :flowerforyou:

RunIntheMud

How dirty is it? At 30 this could be a dealbreaker.... :sick:

AnnaPixie

You're very sweet. I'm afraid I wouldnt be so subtle about it!! :laugh:

disneywm76

Oh my goodness, no kidding. I don't think I could deal with a grown man that can't even keep a bathroom clean. Yikes!!!

MikeM53082

Men- you are 30, own your own home but do not keep it up. How would you feel/react if the girl you are dating mentions the cleanliness of your bathroom? Like so: "Can I help you clean your bathroom?" (I couldn't get myself to ask him to clean it himself:ohwell: )

His response was- "I'm sorry, I didn't realize it was that bad. I can clean it." I thanked him and felt appreciated. I was actually cleaning up my dishes and cleaned the kitchen while I was at it. He was thankful. When I went to shower the bathroom was half clean...:indifferent:

Thoughts? Women, please chime in too. :flowerforyou:

I will say first and foremost, the key to a happy relationship is having separate bathrooms (friend's fathers advice).

I see nothing wrong with what you did. It does seem you have to specify the entire bathroom next time though. :laugh:

afv417

How dirty is it? At 30 this could be a dealbreaker.... :sick:

Dirty... He cleaned off the vanity and the trash can and wiped the toilet.

christine24t

I just would make a joke about it like "wow, when did the bomb go off in your bathroom?" That's a good opening for him to say something and then you could offer.

Men, keep your *kitten* clean.

afv417

I see nothing wrong with what you did. It does seem you have to specify the entire bathroom next time though. :laugh:

I guess I do... lol

afv417

I just would make a joke about it like "wow, when did the bomb go off in your bathroom?" That's a good opening for him to say something and then you could offer.

Men, keep your *kitten* clean.

I had been there a few times already and couldn't bring myself up to saying anything... so it would've been too late to throw that one out there! I figured it's now or never because he will think I am OK with all of this... :noway:

jenbit

I just would make a joke about it like "wow, when did the bomb go off in your bathroom?" That's a good opening for him to say something and then you could offer.

Men, keep your *kitten* clean.

I had been there a few times already and couldn't bring myself up to saying anything... so it would've been too late to throw that one out there! I figured it's now or never because he will think I am OK with all of this... :noway:

Tell him you cant spend the night with the bathroom looking that way :laugh: ..... In all honesty you might want to phrase it more nicely but tell him your uncomfortable with the bathroom being that wau. Maybe invite him to your house so he can see you bathroom

lacroyx

I am proud to say that no woman has ever negatively commented about my bathroom. My bedroom on the other hand >.>

afv417

I just would make a joke about it like "wow, when did the bomb go off in your bathroom?" That's a good opening for him to say something and then you could offer.

Men, keep your *kitten* clean.

I had been there a few times already and couldn't bring myself up to saying anything... so it would've been too late to throw that one out there! I figured it's now or never because he will think I am OK with all of this... :noway:

Tell him you cant spend the night with the bathroom looking that way :laugh: ..... In all honesty you might want to phrase it more nicely but tell him your uncomfortable with the bathroom being that wau. Maybe invite him to your house so he can see you bathroom

You don't know how bad I want to show him "my" bathroom but I don't have one yet!!! :sad:

I'm new to the area and I am looking to buy and have been trying to get accquainted with all the areas so I'm staying with my parents in the mean time.

poncho33

Not sure what I'd say if someone mentioned it to me, but I think if I were you in the situation I wouldn't say anything unless I'm paying the mortgage. However being 30 and owning my own house, I wouldn't have a girl over unless my house was spotless. This might speak to how messy he is that he wouldn't scrub the h*ll out of the place before you came over.

afv417

Not sure what I'd say if someone mentioned it to me, but I think if I were you in the situation I wouldn't say anything unless I'm paying the mortgage. However being 30 and owning my own house, I wouldn't have a girl over unless my house was spotless. This might speak to how messy he is that he wouldn't scrub the h*ll out of the place before you came over.

That's what I was thinking! this is an investment, why wouldn't you keep it clean, not just for me, but for yourself! :ohwell:

AnnaPixie

I am proud to say that no woman has ever negatively commented about my bathroom. My bedroom on the other hand >.>

Same here Cesar. My bedroom was full of junk till I cleared it all out a few weeks ago.

OTOH even if I see a stray hair in my bathroom I go into a cleaning frenzy! :laugh:

poncho33

Not sure what I'd say if someone mentioned it to me, but I think if I were you in the situation I wouldn't say anything unless I'm paying the mortgage. However being 30 and owning my own house, I wouldn't have a girl over unless my house was spotless. This might speak to how messy he is that he wouldn't scrub the h*ll out of the place before you came over.

That's what I was thinking! this is an investment, why wouldn't you keep it clean, not just for me, but for yourself! :ohwell:

Well I will admit to not always keeping things clean... I tend to leave stuff on table tops or counters, as it's just me there and it's my crap so I don't really mind it. However if someone is coming over, I'll go over everything and make sure it looks as best it can... I actually painted the walls one time before having a girl over. I would be concerned about the fact he doesn't seem embarrassed about his mess in front of others.

DMZ_1

I have gotten compliments from women regarding the level of cleanliness in my apartment.

With that said, I often clean extensively before a woman shows up at my place.

You'd be surprised at how much cleaning can go into a bachelor pad type apartment.

MikeM53082

I've run into the exact opposite problem. I'm a hardcore neat freak and everything must be spotless. I'm definitely the worst person I know when it comes to this.

I'm VERY anti- pets because the hair would drive me nuts. This has turned off a few potential women when I'm looking to date them.

I even thought about buying those disposable "booties" and make my guest where them when they come over.

afv417

Not sure what I'd say if someone mentioned it to me, but I think if I were you in the situation I wouldn't say anything unless I'm paying the mortgage. However being 30 and owning my own house, I wouldn't have a girl over unless my house was spotless. This might speak to how messy he is that he wouldn't scrub the h*ll out of the place before you came over.

That's what I was thinking! this is an investment, why wouldn't you keep it clean, not just for me, but for yourself! :ohwell:

Well I will admit to not always keeping things clean... I tend to leave stuff on table tops or counters, as it's just me there and it's my crap so I don't really mind it. However if someone is coming over, I'll go over everything and make sure it looks as best it can... I actually painted the walls one time before having a girl over. I would be concerned about the fact he doesn't seem embarrassed about his mess in front of others.

Messy is one thing. I can be messy from time to time, leaving things on table tops and such and am able to quickly pick it up and recover. Being dirty is another story.

I don't want to address it any further as we are just dating and I am even unsure of where to go with what we have, partly because of the way he keeps his home.

Thanks for your input!

afv417

I've run into the exact opposite problem. I'm a hardcore neat freak and everything must be spotless. I'm definitely the worst person I know when it comes to this.

I'm VERY anti- pets because the hair would drive me nuts. This has turned off a few potential women when I'm looking to date them.

I even thought about buying those disposable "booties" and make my guest where them when they come over.

He has THREE 60lbs dogs in the house (one is his own, long story) who OWN/RULE the couch. I LOVE dogs (I have one of my own) but you have to keep order somehow.

Booties, Mike? I'll be meeting you at the local Starbucks. LOL All jokes aside though, kudos for being clean!

Danielle_2013

I've run into the exact opposite problem. I'm a hardcore neat freak and everything must be spotless. I'm definitely the worst person I know when it comes to this.

I'm VERY anti- pets because the hair would drive me nuts. This has turned off a few potential women when I'm looking to date them.

I even thought about buying those disposable "booties" and make my guest where them when they come over.

Darling! And thus ends our MFP love story! :sad:
No booties, not a neat freak and have a dog.
I'm crushed!

TheKitsune6

I have two cats, a dog and a snake. I clean for 30-45 min every weekday and on Saturday or Sunday I do my "deep clean".

I agree that there is a difference between being disorganized and being dirty. I can be considered disorganized (I know where everything is, other people just don't have the same eye I do) but my stuff is clean, yo.

christine24t

I've run into the exact opposite problem. I'm a hardcore neat freak and everything must be spotless. I'm definitely the worst person I know when it comes to this.

I'm VERY anti- pets because the hair would drive me nuts. This has turned off a few potential women when I'm looking to date them.

I even thought about buying those disposable "booties" and make my guest where them when they come over.

You don't want kids then right I take it.

RunIntheMud

I've run into the exact opposite problem. I'm a hardcore neat freak and everything must be spotless. I'm definitely the worst person I know when it comes to this.

I'm VERY anti- pets because the hair would drive me nuts. This has turned off a few potential women when I'm looking to date them.

I even thought about buying those disposable "booties" and make my guest where them when they come over.

LMAO!! None of this surprised me.... :laugh:

lniffa

I've run into the exact opposite problem. I'm a hardcore neat freak and everything must be spotless. I'm definitely the worst person I know when it comes to this.

I'm VERY anti- pets because the hair would drive me nuts. This has turned off a few potential women when I'm looking to date them.

I even thought about buying those disposable "booties" and make my guest where them when they come over.

I am like Mike, I have a neat freakness in me!..lol. My friends actually call me for advice on how to get stains out of stuff, yeah because I am that good or just too damn OCD. My bathrooms are always clean and when guests are coming over always do another extra cleaning.

Oh, no shoes in my house either and I know people have problems with this. It's my house my rules..lol. BTW: there is different size socks, if they want to put something on their feet.

Prahasaurus

I even thought about buying those disposable "booties" and make my guest where them when they come over.

Do you shower 3x per day?

--P

kristen6022

I've dated several men that had issues cleaning their stuff. Recent one is 1/2 and 1/2. When he cleans, he cleans. But it happens so infrequently, he might as well not bother. When he does something, he does it right. It's just getting him to actually do it.

Last weekend we moved his dog in that had been staying at his friends. I originally wasn't wild about having dog and hair and all the stuff that goes with having a pet, so the arrangement worked. But something was missing. So I caved, I cover my couch with sheets, he vacuums (in my request) every 3-4 days no matter what and I deal with the hair.

When my boyfriend moved in with me, he did his own laundry. A month later, I do both. Reason? He likes to put a load in, then forget about it and not transfer it to the dryer. So, days go on and I want to do mine. I go, lift the lid and find damp stinky laundry in the washer. I asked him to keep up with it, but it didn't help. I took matters into my own hands and I'm much happier. Should he do his own, yes. But it wasn't getting done the other way and it was making me nuts. I'm happier now.

If it was me, I'd just clean it. I have to have a clean bathroom or I go ape****. I realize this is "enabling" and that they "should" be able to keep their places clean like adults should, but different people have different comfort levels.

Prahasaurus

I was a lazy kid around the house whose mother did everything for him, and was well on my way to becoming a lazy adult who didn't do anything. Fortunately, I married a woman who was even worse than me with the chores, so fate lent a hand. Realizing it's only going to happen if I do it, I did a complete 180 and turned into a cleaning/cooking machine. My place now is more or less spotless.

I confess I have a cleaning lady that comes once a week. But it's quite clean throughout the week - she mainly does the ironing.

No booties required when you come visit. However, as is the European custom, you will be removing your shoes upon entry.

--P

TheKitsune6

I've dated several men that had issues cleaning their stuff. Recent one is 1/2 and 1/2. When he cleans, he cleans. But it happens so infrequently, he might as well not bother. When he does something, he does it right. It's just getting him to actually do it.

Last weekend we moved his dog in that had been staying at his friends. I originally wasn't wild about having dog and hair and all the stuff that goes with having a pet, so the arrangement worked. But something was missing. So I caved, I cover my couch with sheets, he vacuums (in my request) every 3-4 days no matter what and I deal with the hair.

When my boyfriend moved in with me, he did his own laundry. A month later, I do both. Reason? He likes to put a load in, then forget about it and not transfer it to the dryer. So, days go on and I want to do mine. I go, lift the lid and find damp stinky laundry in the washer. I asked him to keep up with it, but it didn't help. I took matters into my own hands and I'm much happier. Should he do his own, yes. But it wasn't getting done the other way and it was making me nuts. I'm happier now.

If it was me, I'd just clean it. I have to have a clean bathroom or I go ape****. I realize this is "enabling" and that they "should" be able to keep their places clean like adults should, but different people have different comfort levels.

Sounds like a plan to me. If it's something you want done, then do it yourself. What good will come from nagging someone constantly other than driving a wedge between the two of you. When I lived with my first boyfriend we had a tradeoff. I would do all the cooking and cleaning (he was TERRIBLE at cleaning, the opposite of me. Very organized, but filthy dirty gross), and he would buy the groceries. Saved me some money and our home was clean.

jenbit

I was a lazy kid around the house whose mother did everything for him, and was well on my way to becoming a lazy adult who didn't do anything. Fortunately, I married a woman who was even worse than me with the chores, so fate lent a hand. Realizing it's only going to happen if I do it, I did a complete 180 and turned into a cleaning/cooking machine. My place now is more or less spotless.

I confess I have a cleaning lady that comes once a week. But it's quite clean throughout the week - she mainly does the ironing.

No booties required when you come visit. However, as is the European custom, you will be removing your shoes upon entry.

--P

I make people take off shoes at my house too. Unless they are in flip flops lol

afv417

I was a lazy kid around the house whose mother did everything for him, and was well on my way to becoming a lazy adult who didn't do anything. Fortunately, I married a woman who was even worse than me with the chores, so fate lent a hand. Realizing it's only going to happen if I do it, I did a complete 180 and turned into a cleaning/cooking machine. My place now is more or less spotless.

I confess I have a cleaning lady that comes once a week. But it's quite clean throughout the week - she mainly does the ironing.

No booties required when you come visit. However, as is the European custom, you will be removing your shoes upon entry.

--P

I would hire a cleaning lady to keep up the place at least twice a month. It definitely helps.