Ex'es

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Replies

  • RosscoBoscko
    RosscoBoscko Posts: 632 Member
    Given that my ex is the only person I've been in a relationship with I can't talk about thinking about thinking about ex's whilst in a relationship. I do know about insecurities and thinking about things whilst in a relationship and i will say, don't do it. In the end it will undermine it. There'll come a point when your other half needs you to be strong for them and if they know you still have these issues they will cut you loose. I'm not saying it was the only reason we split up but I maintain it was part of it. One minute we were happy the next things got tough for her and then i'm single again.

    Savour what you have is my advice, otherwise you may be left too nervous to start a new relationship and full of regrets.
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member

    I dont know why we get so down on ex's, as we must have loved them at some point? So there must be something you liked about them? Think about those positive traits, rather than the bad one's :flowerforyou:

    I have to think about my ex's bad traits .. that was what got me over him..lol. If I think about the good things in him things get ugly quickly. Then I start to think about all of the things in ME that are bad to make him not want to be with me.

    Understandable Jen. I'm sure I went through a stage of dwelling on the bad bits too. That was over 12 years ago now tho. When someone took his place in my heart, I think that's when I let go of the bad stuff and now we are friends and I do love his personality, just not his 'ways' :flowerforyou:
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member
    I dont know why we get so down on ex's, as we must have loved them at some point? So there must be something you liked about them? Think about those positive traits, rather than the bad one's :flowerforyou:

    Generally speaking I agree with you. I prefer to remember the good times with my ex whenever possible. But I do think some of the issues that drove a couple apart are what linger when you move on to the next person.

    Yeah, I would never knowingly be with someone that did hard drugs. It's a huge red flag to me now :noway:

    I guess it just depends on why you broke up?? Some things are easier to get over than others I guess. Any form of abuse or cheating being the worst? But I'm just generalising now, so I'll shut up.........lol