Such an endearing lady
Replies
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How about if the person just can't spell!! What does that indicate? My spelling/grammar is ok, but it's definitely not perfect. I'm neither unintelligent nor lazy!!
In my experience, X doesnt always indicate Y!
What if this person who's spelling isn't up to scratch is a banker on a 6 figure income, is loveable, affectionate, fit, common sense, witty, sexy, reliable, doesnt do drugs or get crazy over stupid things?
But hang on, s/he spells lose, loose!! Spell check wouldn't even pick that up! :huh:
I had a learning disability with spelling when I was growing up because of that when I want to make a good impression I make sure I review things in triplicate. When people spell you with U that is just lazy and not a mistake. This is the thing with online dating sites when you are overwhelmed with the matches things like poor spelling and grammar stick out as a negative.0 -
Yeah it has nothing really to do with intelligence, one of my best friends is a doctor and he can't spell for s**t. English is his first language but not his parents, so I let it slide for him.0
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Yeah it has nothing really to do with intelligence, one of my best friends is a doctor and he can't spell for s**t. English is his first language but not his parents, so I let it slide for him.
Thank god we don't have to hand write and scan in our profiles, he would be screwed!!!
As a nurse I can say, doctors can't write neat either :P0 -
How about if the person just can't spell!! What does that indicate? My spelling/grammar is ok, but it's definitely not perfect. I'm neither unintelligent nor lazy!!
In my experience, X doesnt always indicate Y!
What if this person who's spelling isn't up to scratch is a banker on a 6 figure income, is loveable, affectionate, fit, common sense, witty, sexy, reliable, doesnt do drugs or get crazy over stupid things?
But hang on, s/he spells lose, loose!! Spell check wouldn't even pick that up! :huh:
I had a learning disability with spelling when I was growing up because of that when I want to make a good impression I make sure I review things in triplicate. When people spell you with U that is just lazy and not a mistake. This is the thing with online dating sites when you are overwhelmed with the matches things like poor spelling and grammar stick out as a negative.
But I dont have the time, nor the inclination, to review things in triplicate. I'm pretty confident I get my point across without having to even double check emails etc. I do have spell check on though, but that wouldnt pick up you're or your etc
Anyway, my point is, there are probably a million other things to consider that are far more important, to me. I don't think incorrect grammar and spelling mistakes maketh a bad person. But if it's important to you, then that's your prerogative. Just bear in mind your best match, in every other respect, could be in your spelling scrap heap right now...... :flowerforyou:0 -
How about if the person just can't spell!! What does that indicate? My spelling/grammar is ok, but it's definitely not perfect. I'm neither unintelligent nor lazy!!
In my experience, X doesnt always indicate Y!
What if this person who's spelling isn't up to scratch is a banker on a 6 figure income, is loveable, affectionate, fit, common sense, witty, sexy, reliable, doesnt do drugs or get crazy over stupid things?
But hang on, s/he spells lose, loose!! Spell check wouldn't even pick that up! :huh:
I had a learning disability with spelling when I was growing up because of that when I want to make a good impression I make sure I review things in triplicate. When people spell you with U that is just lazy and not a mistake. This is the thing with online dating sites when you are overwhelmed with the matches things like poor spelling and grammar stick out as a negative.
But I dont have the time, nor the inclination, to review things in triplicate. I'm pretty confident I get my point across without having to even double check emails etc. I do have spell check on though, but that wouldnt pick up you're or your etc
Anyway, my point is, there are probably a million other things to consider that are far more important, to me. I don't think incorrect grammar and spelling mistakes maketh a bad person. But if it's important to you, then that's your prerogative. Just bear in mind your best match, in every other respect, could be in your spelling scrap heap right now...... :flowerforyou:
I couldent have said it better myself. :drinker:0 -
it amazes me how significant of a red flag it can raise to someone if they find improper grammar. I can see how it can be taken into consideration, but I believe that it should never be so significant as to kill the interest all together. Now I have my own red flags that I look for, that will make her and I immediately incompatible. But grammar, at least for me, definitely is not one of them.
It amazes ME how quickly people who can't get a date or haven't a 6+month relationship in years are willing to weed out potential dates for dumb stuff.
That said, grammar is important to me, but not important enough for me to weed out someone considering that my region of the country most of the guys have poor grammar and write in "text speak"
On a tangent... there was a guy who had a major typo in his tagline. He was hot, but his profile said he only wanted white girls with blonde hair so I wrote him a note that "I know I'm not your type, so this isn't a come on... your tagline was really great but it's got a major typo. It should be xyz." He wrote back, "Why would you feel the need to tell me this?" I replied something like, "Many women screen out guys for that kind of thing. If it were my profile, I would want someone to tell me so I can fix it. I thought you'd like to know." He cursed me out for it.
Edited for grammar... hehe0 -
I've always thought grammar Nazi's call people out because their grammar is all they have going for them. Find an argument in a forum, and the person that brings up grammar has usually run out of a quality argument. Kind of like a kid on a playground punching someone or calling them a personal insult when they run out of material. I've always been fine with bad grammar as long as I can tell what is being said/written. There are so many forms of brilliance that discrediting someone because there spelling lacks is a dumb thing to do.... As well as discounting someone's intelligence because they don't have a degree.
However text "speak" bugs the hell out of me.0 -
It amazes ME how quickly people who can't get a date or haven't a 6+month relationship in years are willing to weed out potential dates for dumb stuff.
100% agree, well said!!!0 -
I don't do chatspeak. I am willing to let "casual" grammar or spelling mistakes go too. Heck, I'm even okay with run on sentences as long as I can follow what they're trying to say. I am also guilty of all those things too, even if I proofread those things get by me. It definitely irritates me if "i" is not properly capitalized but I'll deal with it.
For me though, it's not a dealbreaker unless it's excessive. I might use it as a "He was a douche AND HE COULDN'T EVEN SPELL PROPERLY" but it doesn't stand on its own.0 -
I taught ESL and English for 8 years and work at a university. The grammar snobbiness comes naturally. You should see how the faculty rip my reports and even emails to shreds for minute details. I don't engage in chat speak much and I am willing to let a lot go by in text also. But if I can't tell if you are a native English speaker or a very low level ESL student, we are just not going to connect. I've found plenty of people to date in the last six months, and all of them could spell.
Edited to add:
I don't call people out on this stuff though, I just don't respond back to badly written messages.
Edited also to add:
I am so smart! S - M - R -T!!0 -
I've always thought grammar Nazi's call people out because their grammar is all they have going for them. Find an argument in a forum, and the person that brings up grammar has usually run out of a quality argument. Kind of like a kid on a playground punching someone or calling them a personal insult when they run out of material. I've always been fine with bad grammar as long as I can tell what is being said/written. There are so many forms of brilliance that discrediting someone because there spelling lacks is a dumb thing to do.... As well as discounting someone's intelligence because they don't have a degree.
However text "speak" bugs the hell out of me.
I don't consider myself a grammar nazi. I can only recall one time I've ever pointed out grammar or spelling in an argument and it was because the person who made the errors was complaining about how stupid and uneducated other people were. My general inclination is to let a few grammatical, spelling and typographical errors go. I certainly wouldn't ever send someone a message saying you could really improve your profile if you fixed the grammar. When the message is jumbled and there are numerous errors, I find it annoying. At some point, I become disinterested.0 -
Is gramatical erros really so offensive that you discredit the entire profile?
I ask because, Yes, I know the difference between you're and your. But most of the time unless I am typing something official or important, I tend to just use "your". Mostly because its simpler, its quicker, and it still very understandable with what is being communicated when its used.
Maybe its the yrs of gamming and online chatting that makes shortening words and phrases, second nature to me. But it feels like its part my own style of casual writing.
I don't understand how something seeming so trivial can be so offencive to some.
If it makes it too hard to read the context of what someone is writing then yes gramatical errors are that offensive. I don't want to translate something that is supposed to be in english.
I have to agree... plus, there's really no excuse for horrific spelling these days. Every single computer program comes with spell check now. Even web browsers. It will even underline the words that are wrong until you correct them. Take the time to use it people.0 -
I've always thought grammar Nazi's call people out because their grammar is all they have going for them. Find an argument in a forum, and the person that brings up grammar has usually run out of a quality argument. Kind of like a kid on a playground punching someone or calling them a personal insult when they run out of material. I've always been fine with bad grammar as long as I can tell what is being said/written. There are so many forms of brilliance that discrediting someone because there spelling lacks is a dumb thing to do.... As well as discounting someone's intelligence because they don't have a degree.
However text "speak" bugs the hell out of me.
I don't consider myself a grammar nazi. I can only recall one time I've ever pointed out grammar or spelling in an argument and it was because the person who made the errors was complaining about how stupid and uneducated other people were. My general inclination is to let a few grammatical, spelling and typographical errors go. I certainly wouldn't ever send someone a message saying you could really improve your profile if you fixed the grammar. When the message is jumbled and there are numerous errors, I find it annoying. At some point, I become disinterested.
I agree with this. When your only form of communication with someone is by how they write their profile you are going to go off how they write it.0 -
Are you guys kidding?
Are some people here really saying that spending an extra 5 minutes either on their CV or on their "online profile" (which they would change at best every week - at best!) to make sure it avoids the biggest grammatical errors is too difficult? Really?
You are lying. You:
- Are too lazy to do it. That's fine.
- Don't care about grammatical errors. This is probably the main reason.
But the best thing is this... Are you really telling me that because >> I care << about grammar and >> you don't << I should adjust my standards and start "considering you" as a potential date?
Why don't we do it this way instead: you proofread your f'in profile and contact me when it's done. Why should we bring our standards down because of that?
Now to show you the extent of the joke this argument is...
I copied and pasted the profile of the OP in word.
It took me longer to upload the image than it took "MS Word" to find the following errors:
But... perhaps she doesn't have a computer.
PS: yes, I'm going over the top. But I still won't lower the bar. If you don't do it, fine. Don't come and complain that other people are screening on this. It's easy to have a grammatically decent profile.0 -
there's really no excuse for horrific spelling these days. Every single computer program comes with spell check now. Even web browsers. It will even underline the words that are wrong until you correct them. Take the time to use it people.
My browser (firefox) does not spell check correctly on some sites (including THIS one). This is why I cut and paste posts into a word file first. Oh, wait...I wasn't supposed to remind everyone about my running log of posts. Oops.
Seriously, not all browsers spell check and the ones that do don't always spell check all sites. Ever since my blackberry died and I had to get a touch screen phone, I've found it increasingly difficult to write emails/texts with no errors. It's harder to type than with my bb and the spell check/replacement features take forever. I do most online stuff from my phone (though not today's long posts- there's no way I could have written these on the phone) so, for me, that translates to more errors and such. I remember using the Match.com app (even on bb it was HARD to type- no spell check and you couldn't type it elsewhere and paste it in). Now if the guy was sending me long emails full of error, poor argument and logic, etc that would be different. But an online profile? nah. Something sent through an online dating site app? nah. I remember how hard they were to use.
So I'm more lenient. I get that your dating profile is an advertisement, and someone who can’t be bothered to go back and fix that stuff is not a good match for someone who really cares. I think a little less criticism/smug attitude goes a long way toward finding a long lasting, mutually respectful and enjoyable relationship.0 -
Are you guys kidding?
Are some people here really saying that spending an extra 5 minutes either on their CV or on their "online profile" (which they would change at best every week - at best!) to make sure it avoids the biggest grammatical errors is too difficult? Really?
You are lying. You:
- Are too lazy to do it. That's fine.
- Don't care about grammatical errors. This is probably the main reason.
But the best thing is this... Are you really telling me that because >> I care << about grammar and >> you don't << I should adjust my standards and start "considering you" as a potential date?
Why don't we do it this way instead: you proofread your f'in profile and contact me when it's done. Why should we bring our standards down because of that?
Now to show you the extent of the joke this argument is...
I copied and pasted the profile of the OP in word.
It took me longer to upload the image than it took "MS Word" to find the following errors:
But... perhaps she doesn't have a computer.
PS: yes, I'm going over the top. But I still won't lower the bar. If you don't do it, fine. Don't come and complain that other people are screening on this. It's easy to have a grammatically decent profile.
Although I think your spreadsheets are dorky, this was kinda funny...
I really stayed out of the grammatical arguement. Some of it bugs me, some I can look past.0 -
lol I think we all agree that this one is a real winner...0 -
lol I think we all agree that this one is a real winner...
Yeah... this is clearly gross!! I wouldn't call anyone a grammar Nazi for picking this apart. I'm talking about the your/you're... if it's not a spelling test and I get what you're saying I could care less. Think if we communicated by drawing, would you get all pissy about a stick figure person or would you recognize that the drawing is of a person?0 -
Think if we communicated by drawing, would you get all pissy about a stick figure person or would you recognize that the drawing is of a person?
If we were partners in a championship Pictionary match, then I would be grateful. The rest of the time I'd wonder why you couldn't put the effort in.
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it amazes me how significant of a red flag it can raise to someone if they find improper grammar. I can see how it can be taken into consideration, but I believe that it should never be so significant as to kill the interest all together. Now I have my own red flags that I look for, that will make her and I immediately incompatible. But grammar, at least for me, definitely is not one of them.
It amazes ME how quickly people who can't get a date or haven't a 6+month relationship in years are willing to weed out potential dates for dumb stuff.
That said, grammar is important to me, but not important enough for me to weed out someone considering that my region of the country most of the guys have poor grammar and write in "text speak"
On a tangent... there was a guy who had a major typo in his tagline. He was hot, but his profile said he only wanted white girls with blonde hair so I wrote him a note that "I know I'm not your type, so this isn't a come on... your tagline was really great but it's got a major typo. It should be xyz." He wrote back, "Why would you feel the need to tell me this?" I replied something like, "Many women screen out guys for that kind of thing. If it were my profile, I would want someone to tell me so I can fix it. I thought you'd like to know." He cursed me out for it.
Edited for grammar... hehe
It is a major turnoff to me. We each have things that will instantly turn us off in a profile. I will never correct a grown adult on their grammar/spelling/etc. It's not my place and I have my own flaws. However, I can close their profile. If he does happen to email me something that just "clicks", I'll continue communication with him. If it's grammatical errors in a text or email, it doesn't bother me as much. I realize those are quicker forms of communication and it's more likely to have errors. Text speak in a email is still a turn off though. If you want to text it, text it.
Anyway, as I said. It's a personal preference. We all have them.0 -
Seriously, not all browsers spell check and the ones that do don't always spell check all sites....
So I'm more lenient. I get that your dating profile is an advertisement, and someone who can’t be bothered to go back and fix that stuff is not a good match for someone who really cares. I think a little less criticism/smug attitude goes a long way toward finding a long lasting, mutually respectful and enjoyable relationship.
A - You don't need a spell checker for "your" and "you're." It's English 101. A simple mistake now and then is fine, I'm not asking for perfection. I mistype words all the time. However, continuously misusing "your" in a sentence means the woman is clueless about basic English grammar.
B - Smug? Excuse me? I'm not going to have a long lasting relationship with someone who doesn't know the difference between "lose" and "loose" (assuming she is a native English speaker). It's just not going to happen. Just like some religious people will only date others who believe in their peculiar Bronze Age god or gods, I prefer people who can spell and apply the basic rules of grammar.
Smugness truly is in the eye of the beholder.
--P0 -
A - You don't need a spell checker for "your" and "you're." It's English 101. A simple mistake now and then is fine, I'm not asking for perfection. I mistype words all the time. However, continuously misusing "your" in a sentence means the woman is clueless about basic English grammar.
B - Smug? Excuse me? I'm not going to have a long lasting relationship with someone who doesn't know the difference between "lose" and "loose" (assuming she is a native English speaker). It's just not going to happen. Just like some religious people will only date others who believe in their peculiar Bronze Age god or gods, I prefer people who can spell and apply the basic rules of grammar.
Smugness truly is in the eye of the beholder.
--P
Will you date me? 0
