SERIOUSLY???? TOPIC: Fat Girls Are A Men's Best Friend?
Replies
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#1 They can fill themselves with righteous indignation at the shallow mindset of mankind, rejecting those that were not attracted to the different shape they used to be, reprimanding instead of graciously accepting compliments, being wary of any kind words or approving looks and swallowing it bitterly that they are worth more now , choosing to internalize their self-criticism and project it into the motivations of others and becoming wholly consumed with the effects of their changes instead of supporting them, improving on them and pushing themselves outward, farther, to more positive benefits and effects, results that they do hold in high esteem. Choosing to focus on something as negative as who is an isnt attracted to your completely different look (that you went and got, by the way) and how that affects their behavior towards you, is NOT a productive way to dedicate your mental energy. Nor will it help you get more awesome or more fit.
That part sticks out to me. Would I be 'worth more' if I lost the 15lbs I'm trying to lose? No, I would look better, feel better, and I would have more confidence, but would I actually be 'worth more'? Dangerous mindsets like that push people toward eating disorders. I am worth just as much now as I would be if I lost 15lbs.
Carry on. :P0 -
I got laid a lot at my peak weight. The only reason I'm not now is because my focus has changed from partying to school and animals. :laugh:
I got laid a lot more at my peak weight because I felt the need to validate my existence that was so negatively portrayed in the media. I had to constantly reassert that, actually, yes I was a sexually desirable person.
Now I'm slimmer I don't have to do that anymore and therefore I don't worry about how much sex I have.
There was a period in time I did do that, but it was more related to having my heart f*cked with than my weight.0 -
#1 They can fill themselves with righteous indignation at the shallow mindset of mankind, rejecting those that were not attracted to the different shape they used to be, reprimanding instead of graciously accepting compliments, being wary of any kind words or approving looks and swallowing it bitterly that they are worth more now , choosing to internalize their self-criticism and project it into the motivations of others and becoming wholly consumed with the effects of their changes instead of supporting them, improving on them and pushing themselves outward, farther, to more positive benefits and effects, results that they do hold in high esteem. Choosing to focus on something as negative as who is an isnt attracted to your completely different look (that you went and got, by the way) and how that affects their behavior towards you, is NOT a productive way to dedicate your mental energy. Nor will it help you get more awesome or more fit.
That part sticks out to me. Would I be 'worth more' if I lost the 15lbs I'm trying to lose? No, I would look better, feel better, and I would have more confidence, but would I actually be 'worth more'? Dangerous mindsets like that push people toward eating disorders. I am worth just as much now as I would be if I lost 15lbs.
Carry on. :P
She isn't talking 15 pounds remember yoovie had an amazing 100+ pound weight loss (and if I havent said it before awesome suace girl) She is worth more to herself and to her dating pool.... Just because we grumble about it doesn't make it less true ...0 -
#1 They can fill themselves with righteous indignation at the shallow mindset of mankind, rejecting those that were not attracted to the different shape they used to be, reprimanding instead of graciously accepting compliments, being wary of any kind words or approving looks and swallowing it bitterly that they are worth more now , choosing to internalize their self-criticism and project it into the motivations of others and becoming wholly consumed with the effects of their changes instead of supporting them, improving on them and pushing themselves outward, farther, to more positive benefits and effects, results that they do hold in high esteem. Choosing to focus on something as negative as who is an isnt attracted to your completely different look (that you went and got, by the way) and how that affects their behavior towards you, is NOT a productive way to dedicate your mental energy. Nor will it help you get more awesome or more fit.
That part sticks out to me. Would I be 'worth more' if I lost the 15lbs I'm trying to lose? No, I would look better, feel better, and I would have more confidence, but would I actually be 'worth more'? Dangerous mindsets like that push people toward eating disorders. I am worth just as much now as I would be if I lost 15lbs.
Carry on. :P
15 lbs here or there is not going to change someone but when someone loses or gains 20% or more of their body weight then yes it is going to change their outlook on life in general.0 -
They are different types of worthiness though, and probably two when you're talking about people:#1 They can fill themselves with righteous indignation at the shallow mindset of mankind, rejecting those that were not attracted to the different shape they used to be, reprimanding instead of graciously accepting compliments, being wary of any kind words or approving looks and swallowing it bitterly that they are worth more now , choosing to internalize their self-criticism and project it into the motivations of others and becoming wholly consumed with the effects of their changes instead of supporting them, improving on them and pushing themselves outward, farther, to more positive benefits and effects, results that they do hold in high esteem. Choosing to focus on something as negative as who is an isnt attracted to your completely different look (that you went and got, by the way) and how that affects their behavior towards you, is NOT a productive way to dedicate your mental energy. Nor will it help you get more awesome or more fit.
That part sticks out to me. Would I be 'worth more' if I lost the 15lbs I'm trying to lose? No, I would look better, feel better, and I would have more confidence, but would I actually be 'worth more'? Dangerous mindsets like that push people toward eating disorders. I am worth just as much now as I would be if I lost 15lbs.
Carry on. :P
- Intrinsic value (belonging to a thing by its very nature): what you are actually worth,
- Projected/estimated value: what other people think you are worth.
(I suppose the two aren't completely independent either.)
Some people are real pieces of *kitten* and yet project an "attractive" image, and so are estimated to be "worth more" than you or me maybe. Still, intrinsically, they are worthless individuals.
Given the context she was probably talking about "projected value"... so those ex-fat people might still have the same "intrinsic value", but are worth more suddenly in our society, their "projected value" has increased. That's life.0 -
#1 They can fill themselves with righteous indignation at the shallow mindset of mankind, rejecting those that were not attracted to the different shape they used to be, reprimanding instead of graciously accepting compliments, being wary of any kind words or approving looks and swallowing it bitterly that they are worth more now , choosing to internalize their self-criticism and project it into the motivations of others and becoming wholly consumed with the effects of their changes instead of supporting them, improving on them and pushing themselves outward, farther, to more positive benefits and effects, results that they do hold in high esteem. Choosing to focus on something as negative as who is an isnt attracted to your completely different look (that you went and got, by the way) and how that affects their behavior towards you, is NOT a productive way to dedicate your mental energy. Nor will it help you get more awesome or more fit.
That part sticks out to me. Would I be 'worth more' if I lost the 15lbs I'm trying to lose? No, I would look better, feel better, and I would have more confidence, but would I actually be 'worth more'? Dangerous mindsets like that push people toward eating disorders. I am worth just as much now as I would be if I lost 15lbs.
Carry on. :P
To our friends and family and ourselves, no of course we are not worth more as a human being. But as a resource to our society and communities and jobs, a fitter, harder-working, mentally stronger, more attractive (yes because of the shallow benefits and opportunities offered to the more aesthetic and the doors that open for them... even in interviews/networking/dating) is of more value to those groups. It's a sad reality- and one that does not exclude people who are above their goal weight - especially if they ooze confidence and have been working hard on their lives in all areas for many years.
yeah I lost the equivalent of Linz Lohan, and I do not believe that this makes me more valuable. BUT - now that I have proven that I can set impossible goals and commit to seeing them through, have made myself mentally more capable, am better able to cope with stress and low points, am full of endorphins, have a more positive outlook on everything and believe in my power to control the things within my control and overcome obstacles in front of me with a balanced methodic strategy - yes - I believe this increases my actual worth in society.
not what my scale reads, but who I am now.0 -
In other words, someone who spends all their free time eating and watching reality tv and not caring about their bodies enough to stop them from growing weaker and fatter and isnt pushing themselves toward any goals - is not going to be as useful a resource as someone hungry to kick *kitten* every day and proving it just as often.0
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They are different types of worthiness though, and probably two when you're talking about people:#1 They can fill themselves with righteous indignation at the shallow mindset of mankind, rejecting those that were not attracted to the different shape they used to be, reprimanding instead of graciously accepting compliments, being wary of any kind words or approving looks and swallowing it bitterly that they are worth more now , choosing to internalize their self-criticism and project it into the motivations of others and becoming wholly consumed with the effects of their changes instead of supporting them, improving on them and pushing themselves outward, farther, to more positive benefits and effects, results that they do hold in high esteem. Choosing to focus on something as negative as who is an isnt attracted to your completely different look (that you went and got, by the way) and how that affects their behavior towards you, is NOT a productive way to dedicate your mental energy. Nor will it help you get more awesome or more fit.
That part sticks out to me. Would I be 'worth more' if I lost the 15lbs I'm trying to lose? No, I would look better, feel better, and I would have more confidence, but would I actually be 'worth more'? Dangerous mindsets like that push people toward eating disorders. I am worth just as much now as I would be if I lost 15lbs.
Carry on. :P
- Intrinsic value (belonging to a thing by its very nature): what you are actually worth,
- Projected/estimated value: what other people think you are worth.
(I suppose the two aren't completely independent either.)
Some people are real pieces of *kitten* and yet project an "attractive" image, and so are estimated to be "worth more" than you or me maybe. Still, intrinsically, they are worthless individuals.
Given the context she was probably talking about "projected value"... so those ex-fat people might still have the same "intrinsic value", but are worth more suddenly in our society, their "projected value" has increased. That's life.
I understand. I guess the wording threw me off at first. I know a lot of people who struggle with EDs and that's exactly what they're telling themselves when they're putting themselves through self harm, that they will be 'better' if they're only thinner, which isn't true. I understand it was from a societal point of view now.
Yoov - I read your post below and I agree, I would reply to that one but MFP is being twitchy. :flowerforyou:0 -
Yeah and its totally not even about thinner, its about physical, mental and emotional strength, will power and self-discipline - not scale readins.
:flowerforyou:0
