Are you motivated by people who are better at pole than you?

lori_en

I've been finding it incredibly hard lately as the further I get into learning pole the less patience I have with myself and other pole dancers, especially if they learn tricks quicker than me!

Sometimes I see videos and pictures of girls who have been learning in half the time to me and can do so much more than I can, and it really gets me down... I start thinking "What is the point of me doing this? Clearly I'm not cut out for this! Might as well give up now!"

So far I've managed to talk myself out of that attitude everytime I feel like thus, but the harder I find moves, the harder I find it to get motivation!

carissar7

Everyone is on a different journey in life. There are going to be people who learn faster than you, and that's okay. I've been pole dancing for 2 years and I know girls that can do some of the things I can't, and they've only been doing it for a few months. Sure it sucks, but maybe that person was a dancer when they were young, or a gymnast. Maybe they were into sports or cheerleading or maybe they just have a natural ability to learn quicker than others. Whatever it is, you shouldn't beat yourself up over it. Who knows, maybe those people you're jealous of think the same about you! Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses. You should only aim to be the strongest version of yourself, not compared to others. When I see people like Jenyne Butterfly (I was able to take a workshop with her and was practically drooling the entire time :P), I think to myself- 'wow, I'll never be as good as her, so why should I bother?' But then I realize that she's been pole dancing for 11 years and has made this her life's career. I shouldn't expect to ever be as good as her, I should only expect to be the best version of MYSELF.

Jessi_Brooks

When I watch videos of really advanced pole performances like Jenyne Butterfly, Felix Cane, Anastashia Skukhtorova I feel really motivated. But when I watch videos of women who have been pole dancing around the same length of time I have been I sometimes feel a bit intimidated.

Everybody learns at a different pace. Some things that come easy to you will not come easy to others, and vice versa. The important thing is not how fast your progress, but that you DO progress. Heres a quote I heard before that I liked.

“I am a slow walker, but I never walk backwards."

You are better now than when you started, and you will continue to get better if you keep at it. Focus on what you've accomplished.

Jessi_Brooks

Also, like Carissar said... You never know what kind of athletic background these women have, or how often they practice.

For example.. I say Ive been practicing for 6 months, cuz it has been 6 months since I started. But I have my own pole at home. I usually can practice anywhere from half hour - 3 hours a day, 4-6 days a week. I get in a lot more pole time than the girls who have been practicing for 6 months, but the only time they get is at a studio once a week.

Mouse_Potato

There is a girl in my class who is simply amazing. She's been dancing for 3-4 years while I've only been at it 15 months. She's a beast on the pole and her floor work could steam the wallpaper right off the wall. I want to be like her when I grow up!

Then there's another girl who started at the same time I did. She used to be a gymnast and her moves are so lovely and graceful. She gets every spin from the first try and she can do the splits like her legs aren't even attached to her body.

Then there's me. I am not naturally graceful or flexible, so I work on these things, but they definitely take me longer than the other girls. I am, however, stronger in my upper body than most of the girls in my class, so several of them are gnashing their lovely teeth as I get my shoulder mount a year before they did and perform a body spiral in to helicopter which even the instructor can't do. :bigsmile:

We all have our strengths. We all progress at our own pace. If I can't get a move on the first try I make a note and set it aside for another month. Or I make up my own conditioning exercises so I can get strong enough to do it in the future. Sometimes I surprise myself the next time I try it. Believe it or not, I could *not* do the Corkscrew (Barbed Wire?) for months. Just couldn't get it. It was a level 3 trick and I was level 6 before I was able to conquer it. I was the last girl in my class to get it, but I was the first to invert without assistance.

Okay, now I'm just bragging to make myself feel better about not being as good as the other girls.

_happycats_

I love watching the pros on youtube, that motivates me, I just want to be able to do so much!! I'm far from that now and I know many of them have backgrounds in dance and gymnastics, so I'm going to be much slower to get there, but with every accomplished move I feel like I'm one step closer Look at how far you've come since you started, pre-pole you would probably drop her jaw if she saw what you're able to do now!

The sports I played previously were hockey and cross-country running. So, I started classes with no sense of rhythm (I've been a terrible dancer my whole life), no upper body strength and no flexibility. This sport doesn't play to my strengths but I love it, I embrace it and slowly but surely I'll continue to improve