If we learned anything from the last thread, the term high maintenance is an extremely relative and everyone has a different interpretation.

I'd consider myself fairly high maintenance. If I go out in public, I try to look my best. I enjoy talking to people and always want to put my best foot forward.

In fact, I insist upon making small talk everytime I go out. Heck, I even make a game out of it. Everytime I go to grocery store, I make myself talk to at least 2 people there. Yesterday, I saw a relatively attractive girl and I asked her where the Greek yogurt was. I could tell from her response (an emotionless "in the back" respond) that she wasn't interested. Doesn't matter if she's hot or not.. it doesn't even need to be a girl, I'd make small talk with anyone. The grocery bagger was wearing a University of Miami shirt, I talked to him for a minute about their football team.

This take a certain amount of confidence. For me, the better your appearance the more confident you are. That is why I always viewed being high maintenance as a very positive trait.

I think, as in the sister thread for women, we have a definition issue.

For me, high maintenance women are women that require high maintenance (from me). Not women who spend a lot of time on themselves. Quite frankly, if it takes them an hour to get ready, I don't mind, so long as they are ready to go on time. They become "high maintenance" in that scenario when I have to start calling the restaurant pushing back our reservation, canceling the taxi, texting our friends that we'll be late, etc., etc. And if it happens on a regular basis. Anyone can be late once. But if it's a pattern? High maintenance.

Also, high maintenance women always make mountains out of molehills. Everything is an Italian opera. Forgetting to buy the milk (to steal a recent example from another thread) becomes a 2-hour fight over commitment to the relationship.

So for me, the fact that you put gel in your hair at 2 am, although odd, seems completely irrelevant as to whether you are high maintenance for your significant other.

--P

I'm maintained

They become "high maintenance" in that scenario when I have to start calling the restaurant pushing back our reservation, canceling the taxi, texting our friends that we'll be late, etc., etc. And if it happens on a regular basis. Anyone can be late once. But if it's a pattern? High maintenance.

Also, high maintenance women always make mountains out of molehills. Everything is an Italian opera. Forgetting to buy the milk (to steal a recent example from another thread) becomes a 2-hour fight over commitment to the relationship.

Yes, I'd agree with your definition - me, me, me!!! I used to have a friend like this, it's pretty draining!

I dated a high maintenance man once .. what made him seem high maintenance to me was .. he always had to iron his clothes .. even if we were just hanging out and he was wearing a t-shirt and shorts .. they were ironed. He ironed his boxers. He had to have his hair cut every 2 weeks, had more clothes than I did. Would never sit on the ground .. ever .. he once pulled out MY sweatshirt and sat on it! WTF. He would never do anything that would get him dirty. He wouldn't even pour in windshield washer fluid into my car at the gas station .. he made me get out and do it .. "its your car" . Yeh .. we didn't last very long.

I think, as in the sister thread for women, we have a definition issue.

For me, high maintenance women are women that require high maintenance (from me). Not women who spend a lot of time on themselves. Quite frankly, if it takes them an hour to get ready, I don't mind, so long as they are ready to go on time. They become "high maintenance" in that scenario when I have to start calling the restaurant pushing back our reservation, canceling the taxi, texting our friends that we'll be late, etc., etc. And if it happens on a regular basis. Anyone can be late once. But if it's a pattern? High maintenance.

Also, high maintenance women always make mountains out of molehills. Everything is an Italian opera. Forgetting to buy the milk (to steal a recent example from another thread) becomes a 2-hour fight over commitment to the relationship.

So for me, the fact that you put gel in your hair at 2 am, although odd, seems completely irrelevant as to whether you are high maintenance for your significant other.

--P

I've always thought of myself as high maintenance. But, by your definition, I'm anything but. I'll eat anything in sight, I'm a human garbage disposal :laugh:

Heck, I'm also always on time and can usually let stuff slide too.

I never thought of guys who are needy or need constant help or assistance to be high maintenance. They are usually just wussies or mooches. Which are two thing I absolutely abhor.

They become "high maintenance" in that scenario when I have to start calling the restaurant pushing back our reservation, canceling the taxi, texting our friends that we'll be late, etc., etc. And if it happens on a regular basis. Anyone can be late once. But if it's a pattern? High maintenance.

Also, high maintenance women always make mountains out of molehills. Everything is an Italian opera. Forgetting to buy the milk (to steal a recent example from another thread) becomes a 2-hour fight over commitment to the relationship.

Yes, I'd agree with your definition - me, me, me!!! I used to have a friend like this, it's pretty draining!

Oy! No bashing Italian opera!! :laugh: It's a good definition, and I think Anna had a point about the difference between what we might call 'visually high-maintenance' and presenting yourself well. I also agree with Anna that often the visually high-maintenance types look (to me) pretty tacky - it's the difference between being well-groomed, and having half the beauty counter on your face/head at any given moment.

I wonder what we collectively think about men who are possessive and being 'high-maintenance'. Someone who wanted my exclusive attention, all the time, to the exclusion of my friends and other acquaintances, who pouted or had a tantrum when I talked to anyone else, or had an event to go to without him...is he high-maintenance, or possessive, or are they facets of each other?

.. he once pulled out MY sweatshirt and sat on it! WTF.

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Jen, your stories are cracking me up today!!!! :laugh:

Y'all wonder why I am so freaking jaded towards men .. lol

My definition of high maintenance man: my ex husband. Whiny, "I need attention", "why can't we discuss how I feel?"~Ugh! I understand being there for your partner, but 24/7 discussions about him? No, thank you, as Toby Keith says, sometimes I wanna talk about ME! lol

My definition of high maintenance man: my ex husband. Whiny, "I need attention", "why can't we discuss how I feel?"~Ugh! I understand being there for your partner, but 24/7 discussions about him? No, thank you, as Toby Keith says, sometimes I wanna talk about ME! lol

^^^ and men who cry.... I dont mean something really bad happened and your upset so you cry. I mean were fighting and you decide to bust out with the water works like a girl. I will literally see red.