I find it best to not discuss my personal fitness goals with people that aren't like minded. That's why this group is so great, haha.

I think it tends to go hand in hand with the assumption that smaller people can "eat whatever they want" and still look great. It just seems like many people don't realize that dieting or trying to lose weight is NOT the only reason to watch what you eat.

And for those people the word "diet" probably means some fad diet where you will lose weight dramatically. I think of a diet as a lifestyle choice. Of course we could eat what we want, when we want but we CHOOSE not to. The people making the comments wouldn't like it if we made comments in regards to their goals, regardless of what they are. Don't worry about what they have to say. I don't think you should have to not talk about what makes you strive for a better you. If they are insecure, oh well!

Call me a ***** BUT...this has always pissed me off! Why is it that bigger people can make fun of "skinny" people and think nothing of it, but someone smaller could never say anything about someone bigger??? I just never understood it - not that I would ever say anything but I've had so many bigger friends make fun of me and my size! I could never turn around and say anything to them!

Any chance you can pretend your doctor said you have to do it? That is if they didn't alreay. That'll shut them up.

In my experience, people who are not also trying to lose weight or maintain any kind of healthy lifestyle will constantly give those people who do a hard time. That's why I shut my office door when I eat. People will literally walk by and critique what I am eating in a snotty way. "Why is your smoothie green???" "Look at you, all healthy" "What IS that?" And at my old job if anyone offered me something they brought in for a snack or breakfast (e.g. donuts, cookies, etc) and I politely declined, it opened up a whole can of worms. Also, I did a two week no sugar challenge recently and people were really nasty to me about it. I have never really understood it, but here's what I say: don't listen to anyone who is not supporting you and your goals. Surround yourself with those who are like minded and happy for you and ignore the rest.

busywifehealthylife.blogspot.com

Keep your head up. When other people try to knock you down, it's only because they are jealous of you motivation to better yourself. I am slender, but I want to lose some weight for a race I'm doing in September and people I work with (flight attendant so always working with strangers) poke fun at me for wanting to go to the gym instead of eating out or having a few drinks. Like you, I haven't come up with a good excuse to tell people when they can't accept the truth. I wish I could offer more advice, but you have my support.

I don't usually discuss my fitness goals with people that are not on the same page as I am. some people just would not understand.

Why don't you turn this negativity into a motivation to succeed and reach your goal. Show them the result and see if they still laugh at you then.

I think some larger people don't realise that you can be smaller and still considered overweight for your BMI. I'm 5'1 and weigh 145lb my BMI is 27.5 and I'm considered overweight for my height. My friends are taller but on the very heavy side, neither of them have had children, they complain about their weight all the time but do nothing about it and continue to stuff their faces without thinking about it yet they still mock me for wanting to lose the extra weight I gained during pregnancy. I've since moved away from London and don't see them anymore, I don't need their negative comments bringing me down.

this topic lets me know that I have joined the right group. I get this from my friends quite a bit, and it angers me like no-one's business!!!:mad:

I've decided that a nasty comment will get a nasty response. If they're going to hate on my healthy options, I'll make sure to tell them why I'm not eating theirs. Two to tango, and I don't mind stepping on toes at this point!!!! Your strength and ability to take control & responsibilty for your actions is either going to inspire them or make them feel guilty...just make sure it always EMPOWERS you to keep doing the right thing for yourself.

p.s. man...that felt good!:bigsmile:

I completely get this. The amount of times I get "oh please like eating a whole pizza would do you any harm" or "if anyone doesn't need to watch what they eat its you"... how about I look the way I do because I watch what I eat and don't eat whole pizzas every night?

So now I am signed up for a sponsored bike ride and a 10k and I just tell people I am trying to get fitter and get my 5-a-day and that my goals are fitness and strength when actually my goals are still to lose 5lbs, drop a dress size and tone up all the flabby bits.

At the end of the day it all stems from jealousy, I either take their comments as a compliment or I don't bring it up.

It's all psychological, for both parties. I'm sure there's jealousy involved, but mostly the fatter or unhealthy person sees in you their shortcomings. A truly mouthy person is just showing how unhappy they are with their food and lifestyle choices. You can't make personal choices based on the vision in someone else's head of what a fit person looks/feels like. No one is in your body except you and it is your temple to care for and make radiant. You can easily turn the conversation on them and with some kind words, you may be able to get them to look into the mirror and find some motivation to better themselves. I like to tell them all the healthy improvements I have gained and they open up and really get interested. But, I would suggest only having this conversation if you have the time, lol!

Just the other night I told my mom I lost 5 pounds on this new eating lifestyle and she did the usual, "you don't need to lose weight!" I giggled and said, "I'm not losing just any weight, I'm losing body fat and I know I need it when my jeans are too snug." There are very few people I discuss it with for all the reasons already discussed.

Hi Mandy, I'm new here. I am so glad you brought up this topic because I am SO bothered when people tell me I don't need to lose weight. They don't see what I see. They don't see me stark naked, sideways, with a pregnant-looking belly hanging down. They only see me with clothes on and my gut sucked in. Yes, I am thinner than most of my friends. That isn't my problem. That is THEIRS. Fact is, I was born with pretty good genetics that made me really, really skinny up until I hit about 37 years old, then I started gaining some weight. I used to hear things like, "Ewwwww, you're SOOOOO skinny!" It was like I had to defend myself! I mean, what if I said, "Ewwwwww, you're SOOOOOOO fat!" It's the same thing: making a comment on someone else's weight. It's rude and crass.

I weighed 125 last summer and felt great in a bikini. I've gained 15 pounds since then and I wanted to get back to 125. But even when I do, it's not like I can enjoy the beach with my friends. They won't go to the beach with me. Not when I look "better" than they do. It's really ridiculous when I have to feel responsible for their feelings about how much they weigh. Hell, I am working my *kitten* off right now - eating foods I never dreamed I would eat - just to be healthy and fit FOR LIFE. If they don't want to put in the work, then I can't help them.

But yes, it does suck when we have to defend ourselves for simply being...ourselves.