HA!!! Brilliant, just brilliant!! I hate all those same things!!! I`ve got two to add:

I hate it when the swimmer in front of you is slower than you and the swimmer behind you is faster than you.

I hate it when someone who thinks they know how to swim uses paddles and fins to impress.

One more to add - I hate it when an old guy follows steadily behind you lap after lap so he can stare at your cleavage each time you push off the wall, and then blatently continues to check you out as you swim by. Every lap.

And I double Hate it when people from the steam room use the POOL to rinse off and cool down! WTF Gross! we have showers at our gym! this is disgusting!!!

You know what I hate.................You know what I hate





I hate it when you swim laps and there’s an empty lane next to you but a swimmer decides to join in your lane.


I hate it when a slow swimmer gets in the medium lane or worse still the fast lane !


I hate it when a swimmer swims on the wrong side of the lane.


I hate it when theres 100 kids in the pool and not one kid visits the toilet all day.


I hate it when a swimmer swims down the centre of the lane.


I hate it when a swimmer pushes off to start their training as you’re just about to turn and they break your rhythm.


I hate it when some kid has done a “polly waffle” in the pool. (think Caddy Shack)


I hate it when people talk all over the end of a lane so you can’t tumble turn without placing a foot on them. (mmmm. I’ll think about that).


I hate breastroke. Sorry breastrokers but it hurts my knees, I’m slow at it and it looks funny.


I hate swimmers that do backstroke and swim zig zag style down the pool.


I hate pools that are over chlorinated so it burns the skin.


I hate it when a fast swimmer gets in a medium or slow lane to show off.


I hate it when referees hold you on the blocks and wait for the big fat guy to wobble so they can DQ.


I hate it when a swimmer stops halfway for a rest.


I hate it when the ugly old guy keeps his speedos one season too long and they become see through.


I hate it when the changerooms have no hot water.


I hate it when you’re swimming a real good time for 800m and some guy is laying on the bottom of the pool with bluish skin and you have only done 400m.


I hate it when you get that guilty feeling at 600m that you should really check on him.


I hate it when you have completed your 800m and its not your best time as the guy took your mind off the swim.


I hate it when I cant swim.



In all seriousness I just really love swimming. I feel so much better for getting that off my chest. This rant was inspired by Denise that had a lane issue earlier this week.

These a reaaal gooooood! Here’s a few more.
I hate waiting for a pool lane to clear up (goes for road traffic lanes too)
I hate older water aerobics ladies. Period. They ‘re mean when they’re wet.
I hate when older water aerobics ladies show up 15mn before the class and start warming up, walking next to my lane.
I hate when older water aerobics ladies yell at me when I tell them they’re 10 mn early pulling these darn lane dividers.
I hate people who walk in the pool. Swim already.
Worse, I hate people who wear gym shoes in the pool. What the..?
I hate pools in fitness chains: too chlorinated, too warm, too many darn hygiene doubts
I hate it when I am able to see bandaids and other questionable stuff at the bottom of the pool, especially knowing that I’m so darn blind without glasses. Is that just the tip of the iceberg?
I hate people making nonsense exercise moves in the pool. Seriously, what the heck are they doing?? GO AWAY! YOU ARE A DISTRACTION TO HONEST, DEDICATED SWIMMERS, STRANGE WIGGLY PEOPLE!
I especially hate that middle-aged skinny lady, with her back parked at the corner of the pool, legs positioned at a right angle, strangely coordinating her opening them widely with the very moment I reach the end of the lane. Yuk, lady! I’m not interested in your V-monoVlog (yeah, bad visual)!
I hate people who swim without wetting their hair.
I hate when people who swim without wetting their hair beat me at speed swimming without even trying to race me.
I hate it when people come straight from the locker room into the pool without having taken a shower first. Or worse, I hate it when the sweaty cardio or lifting crowd comes straight from the locker room into the pool without having taken a shower first.
I hate it when in the locker room, those same sweaty people who just finished their gym workout proceed to dry they sweat using the hair dryer. DO YOU REALLY HAVE TO SHARE YOUR BO, PEOPLE? IT STIIIINKS!
I hate it when 4 hours after a swim workout, during a work meeting , I bend over an important document and suddenly water drizzles out of my nose all over the document, in front of everyone. They don’t know it’s pool water! It is, I swear! Don t you smell the chlorine?