when i knew i was different
broox80
Posts: 1,195 Member
I remember the exact moment when I knew something was wrong with me. I was in 7th or 8th grade and was at a basketball game. I was always a cheerleader which helped me from gaining a ton of weight. I was bigger than all the other girls but was much more developed than them so I thought of myself as fat. My friend was digging through her gym bag and found a candy bar. She said she had gotten it at the last game and had forgotten about it. She then threw it away. I remember thinking how could someone forget they had a candy bar and how could you just throw it away??!! Its funny what we remember!!!
0
Replies
-
I remember babysitting for the first time and spending the whole time going through their cupboards looking for food. They said I could eat anything I could find, so I took that as a license to pig out. I ate a whole bad of sweets once..their reaction was to make sure there was a bag every time I babysat - an 8 oz bag! Talk about enabling. They were desperate for a sitter I guess. At the time I didn't even realize it was not normal. Only later when friends of mine described all the fun things they did with the kids when they were babysitting did I realize that my total focus on what I could find to eat while I was there was really a bit sad. I never cared much about the kids as long as they left me alone with my food.
I know, pitiful. Anyway, here I am 58 years old and I still want to get alone with bags of food...:ohwell:
On a positive note; at least now I am conscious of it, and don't let it interfere with my relationships anymore. And I am on here logging and improving
0 -
I did the same thing when I would babysit!! I did it much worse as a kid and teenager than I do now so it has improved over time!!0
-
I didn't become a binger until I had my first child. I don't know what made me start. I wish I did because then I might be able to figure out how to fix it.
As it goes now, I'm struggling but working very hard to stop my "don't waste anything" mentality. I feel so much shame when I eat my kids leftovers on their plates but I don't want to waste food, so I end up eating it myself even though I'm not hungry. I'm basically using myself as a garbage can. So I've been working hard on telling myself it's ok to throw food in the garbage.
I'm so happy I found this group. I would never feel open enough to post this out on the main board. 0 -
Ah! Same with the babysitting! I used to just go through boxes of sweet cereal because we never had them at home! Awful.0
-
I also have a terrible time throwing out food. My compromise is to put it in tupperware or a baggie or whatever and put it in the refrigerator "for later". Most of the time I'll end up throwing it away at the end of the week when it's garbage day, but mentally it gets me over the hump. I also find this helps me stop eating when I'm satisfied. I have a hard time not cleaning my plate, even if I'm no longer hungry, but "saving it for later when I'm hungry again" is much easier than tossing it.0
-
@ escapepod and stunningalmon,
I have the same issue with finishing all the left overs!!
It's not like I ever did not have enough to eat or anything, I just hate to throw away food! I'm going to try the Tupperware idea. Usually it"s a small amount that I could eat for a snack at some point...:embarassed: Still trying to find a way to not throw it away.
I only feel this way about cooked food, though, If stuff goes bad in the fridge, I don't care, I just throw it out and hardly blink.0
This discussion has been closed.