Losing steam and motivation...
tracieangeletti
Posts: 432 Member
It has taken me over a year and a half to lose 30+ lbs. I'm seeing people on here able to accomplish this in much less time. Up until now I had been ok with this but now I'm questioning everything. I still feel like I have anywhere between 8-10 lbs to go. I have been everywhere on the calorie spectrum. I started off vlcd then moved up, and down, up again, and now down again. I'm trying to stay at 1700-1800 calories a day, although I'm beginning to believe that this is closer to maintenance for me. :-(
I'm 47, weigh anywhere from 123-128 depending on the day, and am about 5'1 1/2". I lift heavy about an hour to an hour and a half 4 days a week and I spin for an hour three times a week.
Maybe my expectations are too high. Maybe this takes longer than I think it should. I keep thinking maybe I should drop my calories lower and if I just stay home and eat my brown rice this is doable but add in any kind of social event and this becomes hard. Trust me it's not really a matter of will power so much, it's a matter of feeling like I'm never going to be able to eat like a normal person again.
I'm feeling drained, tired, and well, just down right depressed. Maybe I need to change my focus. I don't know. Any suggestions? Words of encouragement? Just how long should it take to lose these last lbs?
I'm 47, weigh anywhere from 123-128 depending on the day, and am about 5'1 1/2". I lift heavy about an hour to an hour and a half 4 days a week and I spin for an hour three times a week.
Maybe my expectations are too high. Maybe this takes longer than I think it should. I keep thinking maybe I should drop my calories lower and if I just stay home and eat my brown rice this is doable but add in any kind of social event and this becomes hard. Trust me it's not really a matter of will power so much, it's a matter of feeling like I'm never going to be able to eat like a normal person again.
I'm feeling drained, tired, and well, just down right depressed. Maybe I need to change my focus. I don't know. Any suggestions? Words of encouragement? Just how long should it take to lose these last lbs?
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I'm new at EM2WL, so I can't give you any kind of trustworthy advice, but I have a couple observations, if that's ok.
Heavy lifting 4 times a week sounds like once too many times. Your muscles need a rest day after every weight lifting day. Also, on the other days, you're doing lots of cardio (I presume on your non-lifting days). When is your rest day?
Also, why do you think you have 8-10 lbs to go? Is it the way you look? Can you see the fat on your body? Or are you trying to get to a certain weight on the scale?
Sorry, I'm not much help, but those are things that make me curious.0 -
I don't have any advice, but wanted to say hang in there and I know how you feel. The first 3 sentences of your post describe my situation, too. I've lost about 30 pounds in a year and a half and have 5-10 to go. When I get frustrated I try to remember how miserable I was 30 lbs ago and how much healthier I am now. There's something to be said for maintaining a 30 lb loss for a year, right? ????0
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Well I'm guessing on the 8-10 lbs cuz I'm not really sure what my goal weight should be. I saw on a chart somewhere that I should weigh about 115. Getting there seems daunting and maintaining that seems even more daunting. I still have some jiggly chub hanging on for dear life. I'm starting to look lean but still have extra on tummy, upper thighs, etc... Sometimes I wonder if I should just accept that this might be how far I can go. I just wanted, if even for a little while, to be lean and not so focused on my belly and always feeling uncomfortable any time the hubby sees it or touches it. He has NEVER said a word to me about my weight and he even married me when I was 30+ lbs heavier. He actually thinks I look great. But none the less that belly is still there.
My lifting program is actually supposed to be done over 5 days but something is always coming up and I have to do it in the 4 days. I do spin on three of those four days. I take at least two days off a week. I even thought about adding in maybe a little more cardio on the elliptical but the thought of that makes me sad too. lol Maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm expecting too much, but I do see where people are getting really lean. Shouldn't I be able to also?0 -
I don't have any advice, but wanted to say hang in there and I know how you feel. The first 3 sentences of your post describe my situation, too. I've lost about 30 pounds in a year and a half and have 5-10 to go. When I get frustrated I try to remember how miserable I was 30 lbs ago and how much healthier I am now. There's something to be said for maintaining a 30 lb loss for a year, right? ????
Yes, you are very right and I do remind myself every day about how far I've come. We both should be very proud of what we've accomplished!! :-) I'm really trying to keep positive and I'm not quitting. I'll never quit. Just feel like I'm treading water while watching people swim right by me sometimes.0 -
Well I'm guessing on the 8-10 lbs cuz I'm not really sure what my goal weight should be. I saw on a chart somewhere that I should weigh about 115.
Those charts aren't for bodybuilders. Muscle is heavier than fat. If you're toned and have muscles, you're going to weigh more than someone who isn't. But 123-128 seems perfect for your height. The number isn't as meaningful as how you look and feel.
http://www.healthchecksystems.com/heightweightchart.htmI still have some jiggly chub hanging on for dear life. I'm starting to look lean but still have extra on tummy, upper thighs, etc...
If you're getting there, I'd keep doing what you're doing.Maybe I'm expecting too much, but I do see where people are getting really lean. Shouldn't I be able to also?
That's a question for someone more knowledgeable than me. I'm sure someone (not a rookie like myself) will answer here. I can only say that if I were in your shoes, I would stop stressing and enjoy life. I would accept that I'm never going to look like a 25 year old and be grateful that I'm so healthy. You don't know how fortunate you are.
Good luck to you!0 -
It has taken me over a year and a half to lose 30+ lbs. I'm seeing people on here able to accomplish this in much less time. Up until now I had been ok with this but now I'm questioning everything. I still feel like I have anywhere between 8-10 lbs to go. I have been everywhere on the calorie spectrum. I started off vlcd then moved up, and down, up again, and now down again. I'm trying to stay at 1700-1800 calories a day, although I'm beginning to believe that this is closer to maintenance for me. :-(
I'm 47, weigh anywhere from 123-128 depending on the day, and am about 5'1 1/2". I lift heavy about an hour to an hour and a half 4 days a week and I spin for an hour three times a week.
Maybe my expectations are too high. Maybe this takes longer than I think it should. I keep thinking maybe I should drop my calories lower and if I just stay home and eat my brown rice this is doable but add in any kind of social event and this becomes hard. Trust me it's not really a matter of will power so much, it's a matter of feeling like I'm never going to be able to eat like a normal person again.
I'm feeling drained, tired, and well, just down right depressed. Maybe I need to change my focus. I don't know. Any suggestions? Words of encouragement? Just how long should it take to lose these last lbs?
What activity level did you set for yourself? With 4 days of weights + 4 days of spinning, you should EASILY be in the strenuous category. If you are not, then you are undereating. The fact that you say you feel tired, drained and depressed are signs you arent eating enough. You have two choices. You can increase your calories so your feeding your body a bit more, or you can drop a few of the spin classes.. You dont "need" that much cardio.
The fact that your are 8-10 pounds away from the "magical" goal, means you are probably at goal because you strength train. Muscle weighs more than fat, and therefore a chart that says you should weight XYZ will be incorrect because of the muscle you pack on. Id say scrap your scale now. You dont need it anymore.
You also said that you are looking leaner and the jiggy bits are slowly going away.. HELLO??? thats major progress and a hell of a victory!! Why are you letting that scale tell you that you are failing??
Look in the mirror. Are you getting happy with your results? Are you happy with your eating? Are you happy that you arent worried about eating a bit more one day and freaking out about "gaining weight" the next?? These are things to be proud of, to feel good about and all the more reason for you to throw your scale out and work on the lean body pictures:)
You are doing fabulous. Stop comparing yourself to others in here:) You ARE a success already:)0 -
I am in the middle of my reset, so I am not an expert.
It sounds like 1800 calories per day for someone who spins for three hours a week in addition to lifting weights is too much of a cut. Your body is telling you that it is not being fed properly - drained, tired and depressed. You may want to take a break from eating at a deficit and eat at TDEE for a couple of weeks.
And listen to Raynn - don't let your scale tell you that you are failing! Measure your success without the scale!0 -
Yes, I have a tendency to compare myself to others and their progress and then wonder why I'm not where they are. Yes I know you shouldn't do that. I try not to and for a long time I was doing ok with it. Sometimes I think reading the forums messes with me more than it helps. Lol
I did pick a higher activity level and a 15% cut. I just recently, within the last two weeks, dropped my calories by two hundred. Just two hundred measly calories. It was like the death of a close friend. I miss EACH and EVERY one of them!! Instant depression and loss of motivation. I tend to believe that this is probably more mental than physical though. I wouldn't think that just two hundred calories lower would have such a physical effect although I could be wrong.
I am thankful for how far I've come, truly I am. Like I said it may be that my expectations are too high and maybe I'm thinking it's taking too long and it really takes longer than I think it does. I really don't know.
I need to relax and find balance. It's not so much about what the scale says, although I really did feel devastated when I saw that I should weigh the 115. I think it's coming down to the fact that I need to learn to be comfortable with the slower weight loss. I think about dropping my calories lower but I can't. I just can't go back to that again. I don't have it in me anymore. I think about adding more cardio but I don't think I have that in me either. I will work on getting out of this funk I'm in and just keep plugging along. You are all right and slow progress is still progress. If you think I'm on the right path I'll stay the course. :-)0 -
Just had to add that two separate people at the gym today asked me if I had lost weight. I had to laugh because today the scale read 6 lbs heavier than my low of 123 a week and a half ago!! This weekend we ate at a Brazilian steakhouse and I can't even tell you how AMAZING that was and my extra fiber that I had this weekend has not kicked in yet, lol, so I'm attributing the extra weight to that. Sounds legit... right?? lol0
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Take every compliment you get:) People see things we cant see in our own selves.. I had a few people at my gym stop me and tell me how great I was looking and I thought they were nuts.. I also had gains on the scale:)
So those are the things that matter, that should give you the drive to know you ARE doing things right and you ARE getting results..
And yes... those 200 cals can make a difference:) There are a lot of seasoned vetrans who have decided to take 50-100 cal cuts instead because they like their food too much:)
And dont be afraid to do just that. The idea is to be happy and to eat accordingly.. so if you are struggling at a 15% cut... then take a 10% cut instead... always better to keep your cals as high as you can and see results than lower it and be hungry:)0 -
Oh please don't give up! There are so many women on this site with so many amazing stories and EATING WELL while working out is the only way you will remain healthy and strong and start to see results. It is slow -- cutting your calories further will only have a negative impact, as you yourself noted: DEPRESSED and NO MOTIVATION. EAT UP! And continue lifting. Cut the cardio, stop looking at the scale, use a tape measure instead. AND TAKE HEART IN YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS THUS FAR!0
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Thank you so much ladies for your encouragement!! I'm back down to 124 today and just finished my third month of lifting heavy!!! Woo hoo!!! I have decided to try and relax a bit more and just accept that this is going to take a long time. I'm going to work on keeping my calories around 1700-1800 but if I'm hungry or feeling badly I will eat more and not bash myself for it. The last two days haven't been too bad at this calorie level but if I need to add I'll add. Got to remind myself that it's not a race, it's a marathon. :-)
Hoping that by next summer my mid section will be leaner and tighter!! Who knows, maybe I'll even wear a bikini!! lol :laugh:0 -
Best of luck. Keep counting your calories accurately, and, if you stall, look at upping slightly and see how that goes. I work out 3 days a week if I can, enjoy my rest days and am currently at 1800 so similar to you. The weight is falling off slowly but I too am now receiving compliments as to how I look. When I take a rest week I drop weight faster than when not doing so so do think that all the lifting etc. makes the body hang onto water. I don't know if you have experienced the whoosh moment, when suddenly you go down again on weight but mine is never linear. Keep at it :-)0
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I have yet to take a rest week. I haven't taken any time off since January. Was supposed to take a rest week last month but was trying to save it for vacation time that never happened. Seriously considering taking next week off. Just some time to rejuvenate a bit. Was going to lower my calories during that time but my spin instructor suggested that I don't and just keep at the same level I am now. Sure wasn't going to argue with her!!
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I agree with what someone else said your doing at least 7 hours a week of exercise. That would be considered strenous exercise and you probably should be eating more. Start off with just a extra 50-100 more a week and see what happens.0
