I am becoming the miracle I saw in you and never believed could happen for me. I first entered the doors of OA in 1988 when I was 30 years old. At the outpatient clinic I attended, The Rader Institute, three meetings a week were required. The idea being, we won't be here long term, OA will. Being the "good student" I was, I followed the program to a tee. Three meetings a week it was, I got involved, did service ("Service is slimming!"), even got a Sponsor. I was also told that in order to have any sort of meaningful recovery, I had to give up sugar. I even did that - for about three one-half years. I was not, however, willing to give up white flour because that was "too drastic" and I didn't have a problem with white flour.

In the four? five? years I attended, I didn't lose a tremendous amount of weight, and I had about 45 pounds to lose. That is because I wasn't willing to work the program the way it was intended. I had a Sponsor, but I didn't work on the steps. I did Steps 1 - 5, then quit. I definitely didn't work on them VIGOROUSLY as the BB suggests. After leaving OA I still ate three meals a day, but sugar began to creep back into my diet, then snacks, then nighttime eating, and before I know it, it is 2012, and I am 225 pounds, an additional 45 pounds because of my extra "research".

I got a Sponsor immediately upon returning, but was convinced I could eat sugar and white flour like others I have seen do in OA. My Sponsor was the sweetest, longtime OA member who had 35 years of recovery. She was was sweet, but not firm. After working with her for about a year, it became clear to me that I needed a more "structured" program. So, I chose a Sponsor who is also in AA and a BB-thumper if there ever was one. She had me doing things that I would never IMAGINE myself doing, such as writing my food down the NIGHT BEFORE?! I gave it to her the next morning. I had always been a middle-of-the-night eater and this Sponsor told me I had to figure out a way to have my HP be bigger than that. Period. Sugar AND white flour were out of the question. I'm amazed and stunned to say, it is working.

Once I put down the food, my head started clearing, and I was able to start writing on the Steps. Once I was able to write on the Steps and take a few pounds off, I was willing to start exercising. I'm now finding myself exercising every day for one hour, (even jogging three times a week?!) I don't recognize this person.

I went shopping yesterday - which in the past was a horrendous experience. It was amazing! It used to be that I was an 18/20. Yesterday, I was trying on a regular 14 and XL -- XXL was too big?!

This is the person I've always wanted to become. This is a person who is following God's will, not my own. Left to my own devices, I'm a couch potato, miserable, without hope of it ever changing. With OA and God, I have a hope and a joy that I have never known....and it will only get better.

Thank you, OA!! Thank you, God!

A grateful member in recovery