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Guilt!!

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Forevergreatful
Forevergreatful Posts: 9
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Is it just me or does anyone else feel guilty taking the time to take care of yourself??? I feel that I have been so busy taking care of other who need rather than taking care of myself. Now I'm so heavy that I am having a hard time helping anyone let alone myself!! If I do try to go and take care of me I feel its taking away from my family time. I have a full time job and 2 kids still left at home and a hubby who loves food. HELP!!

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  • RobinCT821
    RobinCT821 Posts: 26 Member
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    Honestly, no! My philosophy since my kids were little (they're 15 and 14 now) has been to teach them to be independent so they will be able to survive once they leave the house. So, they are responsible for helping around the house (you don't need to do everything), they know how to cook some meals, they do their own laundry. This is not without reminding them, however!

    I work part time, so I do have more personal time than you do, but if I'm doing everything for everyone else, I'm crabby and mad all the time and who wants that?!? I make sure I spend some time every day doing something I like. Even if it's just reading a magazine in bed before I turn out the lights.

    We create the expectations other people have of us and it is hard to shake it up as we don't want anyone to be inconvenienced or to cause a problem. Decide what you want to do for yourself and start scheduling some time to do it. Remember what they say on the airplane: "Put on YOUR oxygen mask FIRST, then help your children."

    You can do it!
  • TLwineguzzler
    TLwineguzzler Posts: 289 Member
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    I did feel guilty about letting my alarm go off at 5.45 am to go the gym and waking my husband up when he didn't have to go to work - until I remembered that I get woken up by him at stupid o'clock when he is working!! :smokin:
  • Frmvt
    Frmvt Posts: 15 Member
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    We all feel guilty at one time or another, BUT, if you don't make time to take care of yourself, you will have nothing left to give anyone else. Also, remember you are teaching others in everything you do, so by taking care of yourself you are teaching your kids to take care of themselves and their health.
  • Forevergreatful
    Forevergreatful Posts: 9
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    Thanks so much for the help!!! My kids are pretty good about taking care of doing things for themselves its the busy schedule they cant do like driving them to lacrosse and soccer and EMT and Band practice and on and on.... They love so much and there isnt a lot of time left in the day for me. I m up at 5:45 and running around until I drop at 10. You would like I would be thin with all this running around but I'm mostly in the car!! I know I will find the time for me. There cant be any excuses!! I know I can do this with some help. Thanks again, Lorraine
  • arabianhorselover
    arabianhorselover Posts: 1,488 Member
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    Very good advice.

    Honestly, no! My philosophy since my kids were little (they're 15 and 14 now) has been to teach them to be independent so they will be able to survive once they leave the house. So, they are responsible for helping around the house (you don't need to do everything), they know how to cook some meals, they do their own laundry. This is not without reminding them, however!

    I work part time, so I do have more personal time than you do, but if I'm doing everything for everyone else, I'm crabby and mad all the time and who wants that?!? I make sure I spend some time every day doing something I like. Even if it's just reading a magazine in bed before I turn out the lights.

    We create the expectations other people have of us and it is hard to shake it up as we don't want anyone to be inconvenienced or to cause a problem. Decide what you want to do for yourself and start scheduling some time to do it. Remember what they say on the airplane: "Put on YOUR oxygen mask FIRST, then help your children."

    You can do it!
  • Kanndj
    Kanndj Posts: 25
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    I do feel guilty...about a lot of things. Financially, we are struggling, and I work on production and work from home. There are times when I even feel guilty about sleeping, since I cannot make money while I am asleep. I love a hot bath to relax, but when I take one, there are times when I feel guilty about taking that time and not working. I know I have to take some time to keep from going insane or getting depressed, but it is a balance I struggle with and is part of the reason why I have turned to MFP for some support on my journey to be healthier and lose at least 30 pounds. I know I won't be much good to my family if I get sick, and things that could develop from me needing to lose weight, like hypertension or diabetes, will only cost us more money we don't have. I do agree that it is important as a mom to take care of yourself. There are only 24 hours in each day, and I think we often have to take one day at a time and not beat ourselves up for what we could not get done yesterday. Again, I am hoping others here who have successfully navigated eating healthy and fitting in an exercise program while still getting sleep, paying the bills, and being there for family can share.
  • RobinCT821
    RobinCT821 Posts: 26 Member
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    Here's where I feel guilty: when I'm sick. When I'm in the house and incapable of putting dinner on the table. For some reason, that makes me feel like I shouldn't be inconveniencing anyone. No one knows where the right pans are, or what I was planning to cook, how to cook rice, etc. It's just easier to get up and do it myself.

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