I would like to share an eye-opening moment that happened to me yesterday afternoon/evening. All day long all I could think about was going home with a bottle and drinking away my anger and sadness. Had it all planned out including my exact route to get a bottle and something to eat before going home. As difficult as it was, and it was painful and stressful, I ended up at Wal-Mart walking around for a little bit after picking up a prescription...which helped get some time in before my planned night of binge drinking. While at the gym, I got a text from my brother-in-law stating that if I was bored I could come see my niece in her project display at school. No if I had been drinking, I would have missed out on that because I could not drive (or show up at a school intoxicated). Of course there are the obvious benefits of the exercise too.

My point...and I do have one It made me think of all the negative things that have happened and that I have missed because of the vice-like grip alcohol has on me. My performance at work has suffered (work being the main trigger of my drinking), my health has suffered, I lost the most amazing woman, and have missed out on so many opportunities to grow strong relationships.

Only one day sober and I feel like crap...sweating my *kitten* off and headaches. Am I naïve enough to think I will not relapse? Heavens no. Am I more motivated to try after some (sober) self-reflection? Indeed. We can do this!

Thanks for listening (or reading I guess)!