Hello Rach_19 and WanderingPomm. I'm also new to this community but thought I'd share a little bit. WanderingPomm, I related so much to your story of what seems to be an ebb and flow of binging and not binging. It's incredibly frustrating. Especially when we think we're doing so well just to have that binge find us. What I notice about a lot of us (me included) is that there is so much shame involved in the binge. Afterwards, we feel so bad about ourselves with thoughts, like you expressed, "why can't i just stop this?". or "I wish I knew when I was full" but I think it's important for us to listen to our bodies instead of trying to go against it.

I'm certainly not saying that binging is something we should indulge in, but rather that there is something that our bodies want. And it's not mass quantities of crappy food or sugar or whatever, it's something else. Which is why I think it's important to rule out all of the possibilities of what is causing the binge. Could the binge be nutritional - i.e. have you had enough vitamins? minerals? water? Are you in anyway lacking in an essential vitamin that could be making your body want to binge? If this is ruled out, we have to address (even though it's sometimes so painful to) the other possibility which is the emotional one. Questions to ask yourself could be: Do I feel fulfilled in my life? Am I using food as a coping mechanism for an underlying problem (a painful memory, an early childhood traumatic event, low self-esteem, etc)? Do I find myself obsessing over food, thinking about it during the day, whether good or bad thoughts? Am I using food obsession, dieting, or binge eating as a distraction for something deeper?

When I find myself getting stuck in the cycle of binge eating, I often ask myself these questions. Especially because we all only have one body. And whether it's skinny, fat, unhealthy, healthy, curvy, or anything in between, we must accept our bodies for what they are in the moment. I think it's difficult to say, "well I'll accept myself when I'm thinner or stop binge eating" because that's unrealistic. If we are on this journey of self-healing, we must do it from the inside out, and we must stay conscious of our self-shaming and learn to really love ourselves whether we eat 5000 calories or 500.

I guess the fact of the matter is that when we binge eat, our bodies are calling for something. Most of the time, from the people I've known, what it's calling for is not the calories of food, but the emotional comfort and distraction of food. Food, therefore, as an emotional regulator (whether you're sad or happy).

I hope that helped in some way and thanks for reading.

Sending you boundless love and support!

In my mind, you're absolutely asking the right question - WHY? And making it stop is probably dependent on answering that question. Unfortunately, I think each of us can only answer for ourselves.
For me, it's a combination of factors. Eating anything with sugar is very likely to result in later binges or all day out-of-control eating. I also developed the habit of using food to "cope" with stress, anxiety, and boredom - it's an ingrained habit.
And, I'm more prone to a binge when I've been over-restricting and/or over-exercising.
I've gotten a much better handle on it this year, and am getting close to my goal weight, but I suspect it's a tendency I'll always have to fight. My best defense is to pay attention to trigger moods, work on relaxation techniques and stress relievers, keep sugar out of my body, find other indulgent treats that I enjoy but can handle in moderation, and to fuel my body appropriately and regularly.

Breaking Free from Emotional Eating by Geneen Roth really helped me understand why I binge. In my case, there are many different reasons. The book helped me understand these, as well as gave me practical ways to stop binging. It is really helping me. Since I read the book, my binging has decreased to almost not at all.