Play date etiquette
Nique85
Posts: 105 Member
I just was to preface this by saying that I don't judge another parents, parenting style. Every family has what works for them.
Okay, so now that I got out of the way. I had a situation occur today that kind of bothered me looking back. Here is the story...
Today I had a play date with a Facebook group that I am apart of (it's a mom group). One of the ladies had a son older than the rest of the children. He was your typical seven year old. During the play group he kept getting into "fights" with other kids on the playground. At one point he asked his mother can he have something hard to throw at another kid. Again, I ignored it because kids will be kids. Then at the end of the play date, he was yelling at his mom saying "I want to go now"! In a very disrespectful tone. I just shrugged it off because I know kids can get impatient. Then he took her cane, and ran off with . She couldn't get up because she needed it for support. Finally he brought it back and she stood up. When we all got up to leave, he started tickling my two year old. And he was asking her a bunch of questions like "what's your name"? "how old are you"? and what not. Well, she must have not been answering fast enough for him because then he said "why aren't you answering me are you stupid"?
I just looked at him and the mom got on him and told him not to say things like that. When I got home I started thinking about it, and I don't like that he said that to my daughter. And I don't think I want to meet with a play date with that particular family again. The only reason I didn't say anything to him is because I just met them, and I figured I better let his mother do the discipling.
So my question is.
Would you have said something to her son?
Would you meet again for another play date?
Okay, so now that I got out of the way. I had a situation occur today that kind of bothered me looking back. Here is the story...
Today I had a play date with a Facebook group that I am apart of (it's a mom group). One of the ladies had a son older than the rest of the children. He was your typical seven year old. During the play group he kept getting into "fights" with other kids on the playground. At one point he asked his mother can he have something hard to throw at another kid. Again, I ignored it because kids will be kids. Then at the end of the play date, he was yelling at his mom saying "I want to go now"! In a very disrespectful tone. I just shrugged it off because I know kids can get impatient. Then he took her cane, and ran off with . She couldn't get up because she needed it for support. Finally he brought it back and she stood up. When we all got up to leave, he started tickling my two year old. And he was asking her a bunch of questions like "what's your name"? "how old are you"? and what not. Well, she must have not been answering fast enough for him because then he said "why aren't you answering me are you stupid"?
I just looked at him and the mom got on him and told him not to say things like that. When I got home I started thinking about it, and I don't like that he said that to my daughter. And I don't think I want to meet with a play date with that particular family again. The only reason I didn't say anything to him is because I just met them, and I figured I better let his mother do the discipling.
So my question is.
Would you have said something to her son?
Would you meet again for another play date?
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Replies
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I wouldn't stop going just because of one child, especially if your daughter enjoys it. That 7 year old will be back at school in a few weeks, I guess?
I probably would've said something to the boy. I'm a teacher, and I can't help adopting my 'teacher tone' sometimes!
Sometimes I take my kids to soft play at the weekend, and there are older kids there who can be a bit rough. There were three boys being horrible to my kids once, and I did say something to them. I also spoke to their mum, who told them off.0 -
I would definitely say something to the boy and the mom (or at least to the boy, in front of the mom so words don't get confused). I, too, am a teacher and can't help myself. It's been my experience both in the classroom and on the playground that most kids respond. If nothing else, I'd address the fact that he called her stupid...reiterating that we don't use words like that.
Would I go again? Yes, definitely. I belong to a moms group and I don't really like everyone in it...kids and adults alike. But as I am constantly telling my nephew "your whole life you'll have to get along with people you don't actually like, so make do".
Our moms group has pretty strict guidelines about behavior. I'm not sure if tickling and questioning would cause concern, but when he called your daughter stupid it would definitely involve a warning. Get enough of those and you're dropped from the group without getting a refund on dues.0 -
Yes I would have said something to the boy. Probably along the lines of "are you stupid for thinking a 2 year old is going to hold a conversation with you?" Maybe not the nicest way to address the situation but I would hope it would get the point across.0
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Thanks ladies for the responses. I was just making sure I wasn't being overly sensitive. I do plan on going on more play dates. You guys are right I shouldn't stop going because of one kid. Next time (if he does it again) I will say something.0
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I agree with what's been said, and I'd still go but would adopt a "teacher tone" with the kid if it happens again. I'd address it with the mom, too. He might just be being a bit of a jerk (my oldest brother was like that as a kid), or he may have some other issues going on.0
