I have the same concern. I have only been at this diet program for 2 months and already feel like i am going back to bad habbits. I feel disappointed in myself.
I always wonder, can I actually do this even after surgery......thoughts on this issue would be helpful!

Welcome!

I started in a similar place as you. Male, 45, 425 pounds. I have lost and regained weight many times over the years. It took me a long time to get serious about considering surgery, as I was convinced that I should be able to do it on my own. What changed my mind was when arthritis started in on my hips and I was less able to do all of the activities I used to be able to do even while heavy. Looking at the rest of my life with mobility issues, I figured I needed to do something more than wait for the right diet to come along.

My first meeting with the bariatric program switched the light on for me. I left there feeling very positive about the surgery, but still worried if I could do it. I left there starting the pre-surgery diet (1500 calories, 100g of protein, 64 ounces of water, stop caffeine, carbonation and alcohol, log everything and start exercising). For the logging, they pointed me here to MFP, and that has been huge for me.

I found the higher protein diet to be very satisfying and this community has been so supportive. I have been very successful with the pre-surgery diet, down 80ish pounds in about 5 months. I have seriously considered whether I really need the surgery, but am still planing to have it on September 30th, for a few reasons.

My main reason is that my history suggests that I can follow a plan very well for a while, and then *something* happens, and I slack off and regain. If you look in my pictures, you can see a chart of my weight since 1999. You can see many successful plans followed by regain. Maybe this time would be different, but my history suggests otherwise.

Second, I have two family members who have gone through the surgery, so I have seen the life after the initial post-surgery period, and it doesn't look to be that bad. On of my MFP friends has likened it to a shock collar, keeping you closer to the straight and narrow. It won't give me the good behaviors, and it can be eaten around, but I hope it will give me some physical backing to my efforts. I hope that after the first year or so, I will be at my goal, and MFP suggests 2000ish calories for my goal weight maintenance, which is more than I am eating sustainably in my pre-surgery diet. I see that future as a fantastic outcome and am committed to make that future a reality!

Feel free to add me as a friend if you like!

Rob

Could I have lost *some* weight without surgery? Absolutely. I've done it several times over and gained the weight back and then some several times over. (I've also never gotten even close to my goal weight prior to surgery.) However, it was getting harder and harder for me to lose any weight at all.

I'm a numbers person: only about 5% of morbidly obese individuals who lose weight without surgery keep their weight off for at least 5 years. I don't recall exactly, but I think the estimates are that most individuals that have had WLS maintain at least 50% of their weight loss after 5 years. Now, the second part of that may scare you a bit, BUT 1) that's still WAY better odds than having a 95% chance of gaining the weight back and 2) it's entirely up to you which "side" of average you want to be on.

I realize having surgery is a scary prospect. The first time my doctor mentioned it to me as an option broke my heart. No one can make the decision for you or tell you what to do. You also have a lifelong commitment to make in regards to post-op compliance, and that is a serious reality that you'll have to face. But, I can also tell you that having surgery was the best decision I've ever made and I would make it a thousand times over. (As an aside, I could care less if someone thinks I "took the easy way out" with surgery. You bet I did - this is the most successful I've been at losing weight ever and I don't have to suffer through starving while I'm doing it!)

No, I couldn't. Truth is I have lost maybe 40 pounds of the 226 I needed to lose and then no matter what program it was, it stopped working and I gave up. I never lost more than 40 pounds and then never for any length of time. I started this at 55 years old and 386 pounds. At 5'7" and my age, I should weigh about 155.

This surgery has given me back my mobility, really my life and I'm not even to goal yet. I am healthier than I've been in decades and I have no doubt that have WLS was the best thing I have ever done for myself.

As garbeth said, this is a tool. Use it well and you will lose all your excess weight. But you have to keep using it for the rest of your life to keep the weight off. This isn't a cure. We all are counting calories, protein and carbs. And we are exercising. And we will have to do these things for the rest of our lives or risk the weight coming back.

Can YOU do it without the surgery? Only you can answer that question. For me, the answer is no.

For me, no.

I've been struggling with my weight since my sophomore year of high school (22-23 years). Over the years I would lose a lot or a little, but always gained it back. Statistics show that the chances one will keep the weight off after surgery are much higher than they would be if you don't have it. It isn't magic, and work is required to be successful long term, but without surgery I know I'd still be miserable & sore in my own skin.

I really wish I'd done this sooner and truly feel like I have my life back. It is the best thing I could have done for myself and my family!

Maybe I can help with the I still don't understand part. Once the weight starts to come off you actually start to feel like doing things. I was 355 at my consult I didn't want to walk, I didn't want to move, I wanted to sit because it hurt to do other things. It hurt my knees, it hurt my back, it hurt my feet. But when you get up and walk the day of surgery and you do it every day after, it gets easier every day. And then you see the benefits and then you want more benefits, at least I did, and then you feel even better and it goes from hey it doesn't hurt to walk anymore to hey maybe I can walk faster to hey maybe I can run and on and on and on.

See my ticker? No wonder I didn't want to move, I was carrying a 200# person around on my back. I can't even imagine lifting 200# now 2 years out let alone walking around with it on.

If you have the right mind set then the rest will follow. You will become more dedicated than you can imagine. And you may want to remove the words will power from your vocabulary. Every one of us eat something we shouldn't post surgery. We just do it with more restraint now and hopefully many of us no longer berate ourselves for it.

Thanks for all the replies.

Reassuringly, it sounds like it's pretty common for people who've repeatedly failed to lose weight without surgery to succeed afterwards.

I've read so much about people saying it takes a lot of hard work, dedication, and will power after surgery to make this work that I started worrying that if I can't do those things beforehand, why will I be able to after surgery.

If I'm honest, I still don't understand why that should be the case, but it seems to be.

Thanks again

I think it is a combination of factors...some of the success is that we have followed diets before, so following a restricted diet after surgery isn't too complicated, we know what to do. Some of it is the physical changes from surgery change our tastes and cravings. Some of it is physical changes as the weight comes off and we have more energy and are able to do activities that we were too big for before. Some of it (for me most of it) is the psychological changes that come from seeing the weight drop off and seeing new possibilities. I could never see myself as anything less than a fat girl before and so I accepted it. Now I can see myself as a fit person and while I know I have more to lose, I also know that I can do it.

You have gotten a lot of great answers above. I delayed surgery for years because I convinced myself I could do it on my own. I would lose a lot, then gain it back, several times. With surgery I've lost a ton, and have maintained the loss for over a year. I wish I had done the surgery sooner.

I shouldn't exaggerate, I haven't lost a ton. It's only a little over an eighth of a ton.

You're awesome Grim!!

For me personally, the negative reinforcement aspect has helped me change my eating habits. The whole question of "could I have done this alone" to me is simple. If I could have, I would have. I couldn't so here I am. The negative reinforcement for me was eating something bad and feeling like complete *kitten* and barfing or diarrhea...get that a few times and if you are out and about in public and hate public bathrooms...you will learn your lesson quick. The thought of barfing in public toilet was enough to make me want to barf. So for me...no...I could never have done this alone. I needed to learn to have a healthier more objective relationship with food rather than a personal one...

Thanks for all the replies.

Reassuringly, it sounds like it's pretty common for people who've repeatedly failed to lose weight without surgery to succeed afterwards.

I've read so much about people saying it takes a lot of hard work, dedication, and will power after surgery to make this work that I started worrying that if I can't do those things beforehand, why will I be able to after surgery.

If I'm honest, I still don't understand why that should be the case, but it seems to be.

Thanks again

I had my WLS 3 years ago. I am one of the few people who are not to goal at a year or two out. Some of it is that I lose slowly and stall often. Some of it is that I started out with 226 to lose. But anyway you look at it, I am successful because I've lost 163 pounds so far and am still actively losing.

So why is this working when nothing else did? I'm not sure. What I do know is that I was terrified I would go through this whole thing and it wouldn't work either, I would fail again. I said that to my boss and her response was "But what if it does work? What if you are successfull? If not, you are no worse than you are right now, but if it does work, how much better will your life be? How can you not try this if you have the possibility of being a normal weight?".

She was right! This really is the best thing I have ever done for myself. And I do know that I can be successfull. Even if I never lost another ounce, I am down 163 pounds! I am mobile again! I wear a size 16/18 now when just 3 years ago I wore a size 34! I can shop anywhere and I can do so much more than I ever did before!

I understand your concern and even your skeptciisim. We all had that. But really, where will you be 3 years from now without the surgery? If you run true to the course you've run before, you will probably weigh what you do right now. But with the surgery? You have the potential to be a thinner, healthier you in 3 years.

No I don't understand exactly why I no longer run to food when upset, depressed or angry. Nor do I understand why I no longer take comfort from food. I just know that I now have a healthy relationship with food and a healthier body to go with it.

Pat

LOVE LOVE LOVE YOUR INSIGHT PAT!!

Before surgery, I could lose about 5 pounds over the course of 6 months of REALLY working at it. which is not nothing, but it's not the kind of weight loss I needed, and is certainly not enough to keep motivated. It just didn't feel like the effort I put in was worth what I got out of it.
So yeah, I probably could have lost the weight, it would have just taken an insanely long time and more guidance and help than I had at the time.
I had surgery 2 months ago, I lost 10 pounds with the help of my dietician and doctors over the course of a year before the surgery. the pre-surgery diet allowed me to lose another 20 over the course of 3 weeks, and I've lost 40 pounds over the 2 months since. I considered just doing the pre-surgery diet longer-term (optifast is boring but it does work), but I decided that I would miss the social aspects of food way too much to actually keep it up longer than the required time - I missed eating dinner with my husband!
It is a TON of work as far as watching what you're eating and being very conscious of it all the time, but it's not much more work than what I was doing before to see such little results, personally. The hardest thing for me now is not even food, but just getting enough water!

I can lose some here and there, but always regained it. I was constantly hungry, and made bad choices because I was in a hurry with life stuff. I just had the sleeve last Wednesday, and I am excited because I am not hungry. Shakes and vitamins give me what I need, and I am not fighting temptation. I know I can't cheat or I will be sick, which is a huge demotivator for me. I know I couldn't lose weight without the surgery, and am happy I finally did it.