photo_kyla wrote: »

Actually, no it's not. He's an ex for other reasons but I have noticed a huge difference in how guys treat me based on weight. When I'm over 220, I become the invisible woman and instantly in the friend zone.
On one hand, I almost don't want to get involved with somebody who wasn't attracted to me when I was heavier, because that just seems so superficial to me. But on the other hand, I still have not met a single guy who has been attracted to me when I was over 220. There was even one guy who I started dating when I weighed about 210 and over the 10 months we were together I gained almost 30 pounds (because he's a guy and ate enormous servings and would give me the same amount of food even when I asked for half) and I'm pretty sure the weight gain was a huge factor in why he dumped me.
Sorry for such a long response, it's a bit of a tender subject for me.

Nothing to apologize for, I can understand how it would be a tender subject. I do understand it from both sides I guess. I know I didn't get "noticed" either when I was up around 220 (funny thing to me is that I look SO much younger without the weight...that was an unexpected benefit...first thing I get when I talk about my grandson now is "you're not old enough to be a grandparent!"). On the other hand, weight and everything else involved in how somebody looks are so superficial and unimportant in the grand scheme of things. Like I said I, like almost everyone else, notices how somebody looks...it's dishonest to say we don't, but on the other hand my (now) ex-wife was heavier than I was and it didn't stop me from dating and eventually marrying her (oh how I wish it had...or something had...that was 7 years of my life I'm not getting back!).

And honestly I can't even imagine dumping someone I'd been dating because they put on weight or it even being a factor. Hate to be judgmental but I have to say, any guy that would do that wasn't worth your time or effort anyhow.

I am sure most everyone that is single is tired of it and wants to find that special someone. i can agree to everything most of you has said 100%. i decided i wanted to be 100% happy with myself before i give any percentage of myself to any man. and i am about 90% there hearing in one of your previous posts you used POF made me giggle. i met my ex of two years on there, have tyet to check that site back out lol. i wanna give a shout out to everyone focusing on their goals first we got this!