Bluidqueen, I understand the fear and uncertainty, I was diagnosed Sep 2014, but you have not been given a death sentence. Instead think of it as an opportunity to reform and rebuild. My mother has been insulin dependent for more than 30 years. It's a condition which can be managed.
You've made a good start by giving up smoking. That's something to build on.
Have you had any sort of nutritional and diabetes management education? Your physician should be able to connect you with someone.
Do you have a blood glucose meter and a plan for how to use the information it supplies? I spent October and November learning to eat to my meter and how to modify my eating to get the readings I wanted.

I think this site supplies a lot of useful information.
http://www.phlaunt.com/diabetes/

In addition to this MFP group, I also visit another group every day.
http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/group/394-low-carber-daily-forum-the-lcd-group

I don't shill for any particular way of eating but I've found a lot of supportive people and useful advice there.

Finally, remember you are not alone. There are a lot of people who are where you are now. There are also a lot who have been there and can offer insight on how they climbed out of dark holes and over obstacles.

bluidqueen wrote: »

diagnosed Oct/2014, diabetic,high blood pressure, high cholesterol, obese
Now have put on an additional 20#, increase in metformin to 100 mgs twice daily, testing for CLPD, started Chantix to quit smoking and at the age of 51....... scared

You are in the same boat as me. Blood pressure was 198/110 I was a walking stroke time bomb. High cholesterol, and tipping scale at 350. Smoked since I was 18 now 43. Blood sugars at a high was over 600, morning fast was high 200's.This was around Sept/Oct 2013.

I started using the e-cig, that alone helped alot TKO Vapor has great product if you have one nearby.

now my blood pressure is 108/73. Cholesterol is good and my sugars are in the low 100's and weigh 271.

I just changed my diet, can't do much exercise due to lower back injury and neck ddd , ddj, stenosis and pinchd nerve root.

I started metformin 500 2x day, then 850 now 1000. Started humulin 4 months ago, then switched to Levemir 3 months ago.

It is scary I have neuropathy in my feet, can't feel them. Partial neuropathy in my hands. Not sure if it's from diabetes or above mentioned back and neck problems and have to use a cane to walk.

But there is hope, don't give up, it's ok to be scared, it helps motivate you.