It surprises me not only how some people sabotage for selfish reasons, but how some people are so clueless to the fact that they are huge enablers. It's like, you are feeding cake to an immobile person, how do you not know you are part of the problem??

I had never seen the show before tonight (It's on hulu for those like me that don't have cable) and ... ooof. I'm wondering now how soon I can enroll at a gym, because these poor people.

garber6th wrote: »

It surprises me not only how some people sabotage for selfish reasons, but how some people are so clueless to the fact that they are huge enablers. It's like, you are feeding cake to an immobile person, how do you not know you are part of the problem??

IKR!!! Here these poor people are in the hosptial waiting for surgery, and here comes momma with 3 quarter pounders and fries, because they aren't getting enough to eat. Well THAT'S helpful.... :wtf:

I am amazed at the family members who "love" their overweight family member but continue to feed them almost to the grave. I am amazed at the family members who are not supportive or try to sabotage the weight loss process after surgery. I am amazed at those who have the surgery but don't see the blessing in it and continue to abuse their body with unhealthy food. I'm wondering if any of these people go through the psych appointments like I had to prior to surgery? They never show it as part of the pre-op plan on the show.

Ugh Penny's story put the fear of God into me. It was so tragic, so sad.

While I wasn't near 600 pounds at my heaviest, I could definitely identify with some of the behaviors that got them (and me) to that weight. Drive-thrus were my kryptonite and I would sometimes stop at a drive thru and then eat dinner again at home.

What strikes me as interesting (and appalling) is HOW some of these individuals are physically able to eat some of the things they do so soon after surgery. Why they eat those things is clearly an issue as well - I do think that many of them seem to need a lot more psychological support than it appears they give them, pre- or post-op.

Karlottap wrote: »

The day after my surgery my mother brought me donut holes, while I was still in the hospital! I am still amazed! Though, she is a failed WLS patient. I always knew she is her own saboteur. When I told her no, I did not want any, she sat and ate them herself. Not just a few, a whole bag! Sad!

Karlotta - that's just awful! Congratulations on breaking that cycle and being good to yourself!

I have to believe they are provided some continued psych consults, but most of these people are so extreme they may not see the importance. It's too bad the show is so dramatized. It would be great if it featured 'Average bari-patients' and they shared their experiences so we could watch and learn. I would tune in for that!

That show actually had a smaller series of each of these patients as they followed them for seven years. Seeing the changes in these individuals through the years is REALLY a eye opener. Not sure if you can find it on the net, but the young man who was in his 20s actually fell into a coma for months and barely survived. During his comatose he lost a lot of weight. His mother fed him tacos from Taco Bell, stating he was skin and bones after coming out of his coma. He had lots of re-hab, eventually was able to walk again, and began to eat. Gaining back half of his weight. The seventh year he was dedicating his life to his WLS, and eating correctly. Those were some much better views of the turmulent WLS stories... seven years worth of the same person struggle. The shows on lately are all of the first year only of the same group they followed for 7 years.

Karlottap wrote: »

The day after my surgery my mother brought me donut holes, while I was still in the hospital! I am still amazed! Though, she is a failed WLS patient. I always knew she is her own saboteur. When I told her no, I did not want any, she sat and ate them herself. Not just a few, a whole bag! Sad!

My mother in law did something similar. Not donuts, but she went to DQ and bought sundaes & milkshakes for everyone. Figured a milkshake would be good for me, you know since, I was on a full fluid diet and all. I tore a strip off of her. I was already a hormonal wreck. I basically told her I didn't go through everything I was going through so I could "F" it all up by eating milkshakes all day.

She is clueless, and is my biggest saboteur. Even to this day. I am pretty much at my goal weight, and she is so jealous. It's quite sad.

Aztec4Life wrote: »

april731 wrote: »

What strikes me as interesting (and appalling) is HOW some of these individuals are physically able to eat some of the things they do so soon after surgery. Why they eat those things is clearly an issue as well - I do think that many of them seem to need a lot more psychological support than it appears they give them, pre- or post-op.

Yes, exactly! Now that I've had surgery I know how hard it is to eat. I can't even imagine eating how much they are eating, much less the types of food. They HAD to have gotten some sort of eating guidelines from the surgeon or hospital.

THIS! I am stunned when I watch what some of them eat afterwards. My tummy HURTS even thinking about it. It's awful! I don't know how they can PHYSICALLY eat that stuff.
I'm 9 months out TODAY, and I still can't eat those amounts of food!


I do enjoy the show though, and I watch it religiously.
One thing that REALLY gets me is, NEVER have I seen any of them write down their food, or has the doctor ever asked to see their food journal.

In my opinion, my food journal is the key to my weight loss success. Without it, I'm sure I wouldn't be where I am today.

It's a HUGE part of the program I belong to. If we go in for an appointment, and they ask to see our food journal, and we don't have it? We are at risk for being kicked out of the program.

(We have to be accepted into our program (I waited 1.5 years to get in), then you see the team until you are ready for surgery, then you see them regularly for 5 years after surgery so they can keep tabs on you, and give you the support that you need)

I feel that some of these patients don't have the proper preop or postop support. It's hard to succeed without that.

In the 1980s there was a woman from where I live who died after eating Big Macs when she got home after having gastric bypass.. Her family got them for her, said they didn't know she wasn't supposed to be eating them. So sad!

I've been watching Fat Doctor along with My 600 Pound Life. I was watching one of them and my husband piped in his disgust as to how people let themselves get that big. I just stared at him. Then he goes into a rant about how he can't believe that the family was still bringing them junk food knowing it was making things worse. I said "like how you will jump in the car and go get me ice cream and fries at 10pm? Or get pizza with extra cheese sticks because you know I like them? Or when you add extra butter to my popcorn at the movies? Or watch me drink 3 bottles of wine in 1 sitting then polish off a bag of chips that YOU bought me?!?!" It was a real eye opener for him. I don't think that enablers realize that they are enablers most of the time. He just wanted to make me happy, he sucks at the romantic stuff so when I let him known what I want he will go get it to make me happy. It's been a learning process for the both of us.

I went through some similar events. My grandma bless her, has always believed that food equals love. She was always offering me food that I should not be eating throughout my entire life. I would visit her in the summer and as a child I would gain as much as 20 pounds just in the short visit with her. After I underwent the surgery I had to sit her down and explain my life changes. I explained that I knew she loved me with all her heart and she did not need to provide me with food for me to realize that. I know that she was not intentionally sabotaging my chances for weight loss, but she was my enabler for many years.

I have seen several episodes of My 600 lb. life. I agree with some of your comments regarding the misery that these people inflict upon themselves by not being more grateful for the surgery and what it could mean in their lives. I am appalled by the "caregivers" who could benefit from surgery as well. One daughter took care of her mother for months (no other working job) and could have lost 200 lbs herself. What a gift if she could have done it alongside her mother and they could have gotten healthy together.
I wonder if this show doesn't contribute to the reason why "normal-weight" people don't understand the true value of this surgery for us. They see the failures of these people to have the surgery but never get to goal, or maintain the goal weight. They aren't showing those of us who had to work hard to be approved and are willing to follow the rules in order to make this work for us. These targeted patients, with cameras on them so much of the time still don't have what it takes to commit to the program. And showing the world that we have been having medical tests, working on weight loss plans pre-op, journaling our food intake and increasing exercise just to be selected... I think it would eliminate the "easy way out" thinking that some have. My VSG did NOT involve liposuction, (although that might also help with weight loss ) but I will now have to work for months-years to make my body look like I want it to look. This doesn't stop with the surgery alone.

Dannadl wrote: »

On the subject of family and friend saboteurs.............

The day I came home from the hospital after having my RNY. My kids were 3 & 5 at the time and my husband's sister babysat them so he could drive to the hospital and pick me up. You know how it is when you're being released at the hospital, they tell you and then it can take hours to get the paperwork and actually get out. So hubby came without the kids. When we got home I found 2 dozen homemade chocolate cupcakes with frosting and an extra bowl of frosting on the kitchen counter. My sister in law had baked them and brought them over to my house THE DAY I GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL FROM RNY. Now here's the kicker...wait for it.....she had RNY 10 years earlier done by the same surgeon. Not even like she didn't know any better. As a side note she's regained A LOT of her weight, and I threw the cupcakes and frosting away.

Smh.

There are people that I have met that have had either the RnY or the Sleeve that have gone back to their eating habits within months after having their surgery.

What I don't understand is: why have the surgery in the first place if you're not going to follow through with it?

I mean, don't these people understand that this is life-long commitment? That there is no refund or reversal? You can't just make a promise to this with your fingers crossed behind your back. The surgeons are taking pieces of your body out of you!

I don't know about 10 years ago, but I know that now they do psychological profiles of patients before doing the procedures to help ensure that they're going to follow through with the commitment required for the surgery.

I can understand a family that doesn't quite know what to do with someone that has gone through one of these surgeries. When I visited with my family after mine they shocked by two things:

1. How much weight I had lost; and
2. How little food I eat

Everyone in my family is a "healthy eater." It's just that some are (a lot) more active than others. (Most of the men in my family are in some type of labor intensive career - welder, steam fitter, construction, etc.) So when I went to visit them and I pull out my little travel bowl that I use to measure out my meals to make sure I don't over eat, they were shocked by how much would fill me up. They kept asking "Are you sure that's enough?"

But those that have gone through the surgery know better...or at least they should. And the ones that I've met that went back to how they eat, they say "The surgery didn't work for me. I don't know why."

Smh.