Self Sabotage

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Angi_M
Angi_M Posts: 36 Member
Hello, I haven't visited this group lately, but reading all of the posts has reminded me that I am not alone in struggling with emotional eating. If anyone needs support, feel free to add me. I am feeling pretty low tonight. I have went over my calories everyday this last week and have just finished downing 4 large pieces of pizza. My stomach hurts now :( I have been sabotaging all of my effort and progress that I have made since the beginning of the year. I have been losing very slowly and was down 7 lbs, but have gained 3 back. I have an exam coming up on Thursday and have not been dealing with the stress and anxiety very well. I've been eating until I don't feel well and just eating because I feel like if I deprive myself of something it adds more stress and I feel like there is enough to deal with and I give in. Anyway, thanks for listening. :) Would be great if someone has experience with similar self sabotaging tendencies. Hoping to find an "accountability buddy".

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  • rebekahzinn1
    rebekahzinn1 Posts: 65 Member
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    You can do this. I totally understand what you are going through. I'm happy to talk.
  • ahealthiercara
    ahealthiercara Posts: 139 Member
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    I've been there, I've just historically kept it to myself so kudos to you for fessing up and continuing to log even though you're going over. You can do this - see if you take a walk or do some other exercise instead of eating when you're stressed?
  • StarLight2001
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    I've been there. I'm like oh i've been good all week imma take a sip of soda. Than i drink the whole can. I'm not a sweet eater but i love hot cheetoes with a lil lemon. Now I'm back at work after staying home for 4yrs. I'm so stressed out and want to over eat. But i think of how far I've come and don't want to go back. If you feel like talking feel free to add me.
  • Angi_M
    Angi_M Posts: 36 Member
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    Hello, over again today, no food really in the house, but I did go for a walk and have almost drank all eight glasses of water. I can't wait until after tomorrow. :)
    You can do this. I totally understand what you are going through. I'm happy to talk.

    Thank you Rebakahzinn1, I appreciate that. Congrats on your success, very inspiring!

    I've been there, I've just historically kept it to myself so kudos to you for fessing up and continuing to log even though you're going over. You can do this - see if you take a walk or do some other exercise instead of eating when you're stressed?

    Thank you for the advice, that is exactly what I did, and I did feel better. :) Are you logging now when you go over? I hate looking at the reports later though, makes me almost not want to be honest about it. Thinking about restarting again after my exam. I booked Friday off of work, so I am going to have a me day.
    I've been there. I'm like oh i've been good all week imma take a sip of soda. Than i drink the whole can. I'm not a sweet eater but i love hot cheetoes with a lil lemon. Now I'm back at work after staying home for 4yrs. I'm so stressed out and want to over eat. But i think of how far I've come and don't want to go back. If you feel like talking feel free to add me.

    Hi Starlight2001, that is exactly what I have been doing, I am not a sweet eater either, I love salty things and I cannot stop. I understand juggling everything, its like you need to be constantly on top of everything. Very stressful sometimes. I have added you, if you feel like talking too I am always around.
  • Greeneyedgrl_24
    Greeneyedgrl_24 Posts: 34 Member
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    I totally understand this. I was doing awesome for 3 weeks then I had only 3 BITES of pizza and lost control. Three days later I am finally back on track. I keep telling myself one day at a time, I've done this through 100 pounds, I can do it for 25 more. I realized this will always be a struggle for me and I have to stay on top of myself.

    I tell myself everyday that I am so thankful this is MY struggle; not starvation, alcoholism, or worse.

    You can do this, please feel free to add me :)
  • ahealthiercara
    ahealthiercara Posts: 139 Member
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    Yes, I do log it now and logging it makes me eat a lot less than I would have previously. I may still binge sometimes but the binges are smaller. It is definitely hard to look at sometimes but that's what logging is for - accountability.

    Congrats on taking healthier steps (literally)!

    I've been there, I've just historically kept it to myself so kudos to you for fessing up and continuing to log even though you're going over. You can do this - see if you take a walk or do some other exercise instead of eating when you're stressed?

    Thank you for the advice, that is exactly what I did, and I did feel better. :) Are you logging now when you go over? I hate looking at the reports later though, makes me almost not want to be honest about it. Thinking about restarting again after my exam. I booked Friday off of work, so I am going to have a me day.
  • princesswarrior79
    princesswarrior79 Posts: 5 Member
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    I sabotage myself as well. I will go over on the weekends, and I will log everything. I mean I am losing inches, but not lbs. I get so frustrated. I am also an emotional eater. I find having low calorie snacks around help me feel like I'm cheating, without eating a bunch of calories. I have Jello Sugar-Free snack cups for just those occasions. I overeat with candy and not knowing when to stop.
    Feel free to add me. I am available to talk...
  • allegrettoandante
    allegrettoandante Posts: 5 Member
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    Yeah I don't get why we self sabotage either, it really doesn't make any sense.
  • tlmeyn
    tlmeyn Posts: 369 Member
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    I think the sabotage is punishment. I think I used to do it to punish my mother, who was always so obsessed about my weight. Then It kind of a "screw it" mentality when I am stredded or things aren't going my way, or especially when I am am angry. But I finally realized in my SOUL that the only person I am hurting is myself.

    That said, I have days when I am just HUNGRY. Or days when I am out that I just want to enjoy myself. I will eat more, but I ALWAYS log it. When I log it, I can see what I am doing (so can my friends) even though it can be embarrassing and discouraging. It helps to keep me in check, because It's hard to sneak when you are boing honest with yourself.

    I know what to blame if the weight loss is slowing. I hate to see those big RED numbers. I counter them with trying to eat a little less for several days in a row, so my average calorie intake for the week is still good :wink:
  • makeitnasty184
    makeitnasty184 Posts: 48 Member
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    I am ready to wreck my diet today for no other reason than boredom. I'm not stressed or anxious. I've had a really good week eating nutritiously and exercising. But right now I just want to eat pizza. Like a whole one. I'm about to go to a yoga class and hopefully I'll feel better after.
    I know breaking right now will only make me feel guilty after and will ruin the progress I've made trying to get back on track but my compulsion feels so much stronger than my will power :( I know it will get easier as days and weeks go by but right now it feels impossible.
  • tlmeyn
    tlmeyn Posts: 369 Member
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    I am ready to wreck my diet today for no other reason than boredom. I'm not stressed or anxious. I've had a really good week eating nutritiously and exercising. But right now I just want to eat pizza. Like a whole one. I'm about to go to a yoga class and hopefully I'll feel better after.
    I know breaking right now will only make me feel guilty after and will ruin the progress I've made trying to get back on track but my compulsion feels so much stronger than my will power :( I know it will get easier as days and weeks go by but right now it feels impossible.

    I hope you made it. Those compulsions are so hard to fight,
  • makeitnasty184
    makeitnasty184 Posts: 48 Member
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    I did, I went to yoga and felt a lot better. Ate a healthy dinner and drank lots of water and I feel in control today. It felt good to wake up this morning and not be bloated after a binge.
    I love the way I feel when I'm eating clean but that is so much less tangible than the taste of my trigger foods. It makes it hard to stay focused and even worse, the guilt I feel for going for instant gratification rather than delayed long term gratification makes me feel so weak.
    But yesterday was a good day and I've planned ahead to make sure today is good too. I'm doing the best I can and I feel pretty good about that.
  • ahealthiercara
    ahealthiercara Posts: 139 Member
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    I've been there, I've just historically kept it to myself so kudos to you for fessing up and continuing to log even though you're going over. You can do this - see if you take a walk or do some other exercise instead of eating when you're stressed?

    Thank you for the advice, that is exactly what I did, and I did feel better. :) Are you logging now when you go over? I hate looking at the reports later though, makes me almost not want to be honest about it. Thinking about restarting again after my exam. I booked Friday off of work, so I am going to have a me day.

    [/quote]

    I do my best to log accurately even when I go over. I will admit there have been a couple times when I left things off because it was too hard to look at. I often exercise more that day to try and compensate. When my weight loss stalls I can point to exactly why - no one's fault but my own. But its ok. I have good days and bad days but it feels like such a huge victory to be below 200 that as long as I'm maintaining right now I feel OK about it. I feel like I need time to adjust mentally/emotionally - that shows up as more binging than usual lately. I'm being kind to myself through the process knowing as long as I keep making the effort I will get back on track.