Heavy people think it is easy for us
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I can definitely relate to this thread, and yeah, it does annoy me that no-one will take any advice about eating or exercise, as if we don't know what we are talking about!
The thing that bugs me most is when people say I'm "lucky". No, I'm not. Everyone else in my family is overweight, so I wasn't born this way, and they have a lot of health problems as a result. Spending years watching them suffer meant I have always tried to look after myself. I watch what I eat all the time and try to exercise as much as possible and, if anything, have ended up at the other end of the spectrum on more than one occasion and been ill as a result. That's not lucky, I just prioritise my health, having seen and experienced how badly things can go wrong if you don't look after your body.
And breathe. Rant over...0 -
louubelle16 wrote: »I can definitely relate to this thread, and yeah, it does annoy me that no-one will take any advice about eating or exercise, as if we don't know what we are talking about!
The thing that bugs me most is when people say I'm "lucky". No, I'm not. Everyone else in my family is overweight, so I wasn't born this way, and they have a lot of health problems as a result. Spending years watching them suffer meant I have always tried to look after myself. I watch what I eat all the time and try to exercise as much as possible and, if anything, have ended up at the other end of the spectrum on more than one occasion and been ill as a result. That's not lucky, I just prioritise my health, having seen and experienced how badly things can go wrong if you don't look after your body.
And breathe. Rant over...
Preach. My entire family blows up like balloons after college, and I've been surrounded by large family members telling me to watch my weight, encouraging me to use small plates, and keep active to prevent me from the same fate. I'm very lucky to have been raised in a supportive, if larger, environment, but I'm certainly fighting the same uphill battle as anyone else. I'm just winning. It's not about where you come from, it's about how you decide to take control of your own body and make it exactly what you want.0 -
starfish235 wrote: »Over the years I have come to find out that me as a thinner person can not add to discussion on how to lose weight. Women always ask me what do to stay thin. Then they discount me and say I don't understand. I work hard to keep my weight down and I understand how to do it. They all think it is natural to my body chemistry. I now try hard to not say a word. However starting MFP has made me want to tell everyone about my new discovery.
Totally agree ... The lower the scales the less I can eat to maintain (when I get there lol ) so it's harder to stay at the lower maintaining calories . Just as hard as it is loosing weight .
I think you have good experience though so can advise others on how to :-) they should appreciate that . And see you as an inspiration .0 -
You live in a great spot, Speed. I often lust for a better climate. One of the reasons running has never worked well for me is that here in Wisconsin it's really really hard to run outdoors year round. It's not even JUST the cold but also finding safe pavement. I'm not one to enjoy track or treadmill. I should try to get into cross country skiing..bought skis and boots a couple years ago but just haven't broken the seal yet. "Starting" is the hardest part!
Yep. Its a bit better in Colorado where I used to live..but even with sidewalks, I NEVER wanted to run or walk in the winter..LOL. Treadmill is BORING. Cross country skiing is great! It's enough to keep you warm and you can appreciate the pretty scenery.
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Having always been built "thin", my struggle has always been to add muscle. And while yes, I've had the ups and downs with having babies, or slacking off on workouts, etc, I've never had the mindset that I COULDN'T get back into shape. And I think that is one of the biggest differences between very heavy people and thin people.
There is a personal trainer who wrote a book called "from fit, to fat, to fit". He purposely stopped working out, eating junk food, and gained something like 60 lbs so he could prove to his overweight clients that yes, you can easily lose the weight. What he learned is having always been fit: the embarrassment of walking into a gym to start over (feeling like everyone was judging him), having always eaten "clean", how hard it was go give up the junk food and how long the cravings for junk food stayed with him, as well as how easy it was to turn to food as a crutch when getting discouraged.
So instead of demonstrating to his clients how it was totally within their power to get in shape... he found he new understanding of the struggles of overweight people.
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wildthingsmom wrote: »
So instead of demonstrating to his clients how it was totally within their power to get in shape... he found he new understanding of the struggles of overweight people.
This is the best statement and example I've read in a while. I think that's the key. People who have always been thin don't understand the struggle of overweight folks and of course the opposite as well. Those who have always been overweight don't understand the mindset of the thin person.
I've only had to lose weight once before in my life and I sort-of get it...but not 100%. It's a culture shock to me to have to lose weight, so I try to put myself in the other persons shoes...or should I say 'body'?0 -
I agree , people say that I am lucky to be thin and think that I must have a good metabolism, and always blame their fat on a poor metabolism. I work hard not to gain weight by working out at the gym 4-5 times a week and watching my nutrition. I watch them eating fish and chips while I have a wrap with salad and lean chicken or salmon. I would be fat too if I didn't work at maintaining my weight.0
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I needed to read this! When I made the decision to get healthy, I was floored by the reactions of some of my friends. Perhaps "contempt" is too strong of a word, but the way they acted definitely hurt a tiny bit. It suddenly became acceptable to tease and say things like, "why do you care skinny b*****??? Hahaha" It isn't that I expected cheerleaders in my corner, I just didn't expect the other end of the spectrum either. (Oh and sorry I'm newly active to mfp. 33 year old mother of 3 here)0
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wildthingsmom wrote: »
There is a personal trainer who wrote a book called "from fit, to fat, to fit". He purposely stopped working out, eating junk food, and gained something like 60 lbs so he could prove to his overweight clients that yes, you can easily lose the weight. What he learned is having always been fit: the embarrassment of walking into a gym to start over (feeling like everyone was judging him), having always eaten "clean", how hard it was go give up the junk food and how long the cravings for junk food stayed with him, as well as how easy it was to turn to food as a crutch when getting discouraged.
So instead of demonstrating to his clients how it was totally within their power to get in shape... he found he new understanding of the struggles of overweight people.
Based on your description, I just bought this! It sounds really fascinating.0 -
I'm going to read that book too. Sounds really interesting!0
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I heard about that book too. I saw it on a morning show. I do know it Is difficult for a heavy person in many many ways. Kygirl yes you are right. It is OK to pick on people that are thin or have worked hard to get there. It happens much more often than people think it does. But I certainly don't want go and ruin what I have to make them feel better. I would not on a bet go gain weight to see there issues. It is a catch 22 I guess.0
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I've got to admit, when it comes to losing weight I honestly think heavier people have it easier than us; more to lose and it tends to come off quicker. When you only have about 15lbs to lose it suddenly feels much more difficult
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I have the same problem, fat friends say that it's their age and slow metabolism, but when you are out socialising you and see what they eat you can tell why they are so fat.0
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starfish235 wrote: »Over the years I have come to find out that me as a thinner person can not add to discussion on how to lose weight. Women always ask me what do to stay thin. Then they discount me and say I don't understand. I work hard to keep my weight down and I understand how to do it. They all think it is natural to my body chemistry. I now try hard to not say a word. However starting MFP has made me want to tell everyone about my new discovery.
I totally understand!!!! I have about 15-20 lbs more to go and my friends who are really heavy and have 80 + pounds to go, don't want to hear my advice because Im "skinny".
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I had my best friend totally turn on me due to my weight loss. I feel like unless you have 100 pounds to lose, nobody will encourage you or care that you are trying to eat healthy and exercise.kygirl8282 wrote: »I needed to read this! When I made the decision to get healthy, I was floored by the reactions of some of my friends. Perhaps "contempt" is too strong of a word, but the way they acted definitely hurt a tiny bit. It suddenly became acceptable to tease and say things like, "why do you care skinny b*****??? Hahaha" It isn't that I expected cheerleaders in my corner, I just didn't expect the other end of the spectrum either. (Oh and sorry I'm newly active to mfp. 33 year old mother of 3 here)
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This had been an excellent thread to read! Having weighed 40 pounds more than I now weigh my thought is that being overweight is hard, losing weight is hard and maintaining weight is hard. We each get to choose the hard we want to deal with. I prefer the hard work of maintenance.0
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I have lost over 100 pounds and maintained it for over a year and a half now, within 5 pounds. I have never worked so hard in my life - I feel like i work harder in maintenance than when i was losing, and it's harder b/c you don't have the motivation of being obese or even overweight...the only thing i don't do that i used to do is log, which i did religiously during the weight loss process. I have been thinking about logging lately b/c even though my weight is the same, i've cut way back on exercise and i think i need to tone up....i feel like I have the tiniest love handles on the side and i've gained an inch or two on my waist....which is freaking me out a bit. but if i say anything to someone who is heavier than me, they look at me like i'm crazy. It's frustrating...0
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Wildthingsmom....i have seen a woman from England do the same thing (televised documentary)...I don't think that type of experiment can be equated to those people who are obese and struggle with their weight. If you don't have a problem with food to begin with, putting on weight and then losing it isn't likely to be an issue. Like, if you took a person who didn't have a problem with alcohol and had them drink themselves silly for a few months and then said, hey, you have to stop drinking....well, most likely they would be able to do it since they didn't have a problem in the first place.0
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Eh, I've never had a "problem" with food, but it's still easy to put on weight and hard to get it off.0
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snarlingcoyote wrote: »That happens at both ends and I totally feel your pain! I have a huge bone structure. I will never be below a size 6. Right now, my hips are bone against skin, so I may lose tummy and rump, but I am as narrow across as I will ever be. I am one of those people who, when they put their fingers around their wrists have over an inch of gap space.
And I only wear bracelets from China made for Chinese people because my wrists are so small. Even medically overweight, my shoes with ankle straps were tightened smaller than the smallest notch.
My wrist it 6 1/4" around right now. My ankle is just under 8". I weigh 143-ish. So...yeah, I want to be at the light end of my possible weight range! I have teeny bones, and the extra fat doesn't look good on me. Once I get back to 125, I'll reassess. 0
