How did it start for you?
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Revonue
Posts: 135 Member
How did your binge eating start?
I was on a break from school and had a few really bad days in a row. Panic, restrict (or purge). Repeat.
The really weird thing is that I feel like I could recover relatively easily if I didn't find binge eating so...pleasurable? I probably sound crazy, and yes, in the end there's always shame, regret, and even physical pain. But the texture and taste of all those foods, plus the filling of time, and the anticipation leading up to it...there's something so alluring to it, even though I absolutely hate it at the same time. It's very frustrating.
I'm really curious to learn how your binge eating got started, and when you knew it was a problem.
I was on a break from school and had a few really bad days in a row. Panic, restrict (or purge). Repeat.
The really weird thing is that I feel like I could recover relatively easily if I didn't find binge eating so...pleasurable? I probably sound crazy, and yes, in the end there's always shame, regret, and even physical pain. But the texture and taste of all those foods, plus the filling of time, and the anticipation leading up to it...there's something so alluring to it, even though I absolutely hate it at the same time. It's very frustrating.
I'm really curious to learn how your binge eating got started, and when you knew it was a problem.
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I joined mfp for the first time about three years ago. I had never dieted before ever, just wanted to lose the last few pounds of baby weight, but was not overweight by any means. Because I didn't know any better, I did the 1200 calories thing for about 6 months, dropped 30 pounds, skinniest I'd ever been as an adult, then the holidays hit, and the binges started. I think it's just a horrible habit, that I've allowed myself to continue solidifying for years. I knew within a few months I had a real problem, because I couldn't not do it anymore. I hate it and struggle on a daily basis. I hate how much I think about food all the time. I go about two weeks doing well, then it hits and I can't control it, and when I finally give in to crazy brain....god yes it's pleasurable. I exercise excessively to keep it in check. I hope I get myself in control before my two daughters are old enough to notice. I blame the severe calorie restriction for starting it, but think of it as just a bad habit I'm having a hard time kicking in terms of what has sustained binge eating for me.0
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I was an emotional overeater for as long as I can remember. I was younger than 5 years when I ate part of a stick of butter while hiding in my g-mom's kitchen.
I remember being 13, had been told I was fat, had " a fat a.." by my nasty father then hid a case of candy bars in my room and ate every one. So, those candy bars were when I realized I had a problem. I'm in my 40's and binged often from 13 until one month ago.0 -
I had a sewage back up in my basement and it was really expensive and I had to get my finished basement completely redone. It's still in process. The money stress has me a huge mess and it seems to be how I am coping with it.0
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I've been a binge eater for so long, that I really can't remember.1
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I remember eating was one of the only ways I could relate to my father. Oftentimes after dinner we would clear the table but leave food out on the kitchen table while we did the dishes and he and I would pick away at whatever was left even if we weren't hungry anymore. Then when I was older I decided to become a vegetarian, and he kept buying tons and tons of nuts to keep around the house for me because he thought they were the only way to get protein. I would eat a pound of peanuts in one sitting at 14 years old. Actually nuts are still one of my favorite binge foods.0
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For me, it started when I was 15/16. I restricted to the point of eating just 400 cals a day. And when I reached my goal, well..I started binging. I became extremely overweight. It continued until I was 18/19. After that, it completely went away. I am not sure how but it went away when I started working part time in a fast food resto and lose weight effortlessly (maybe because of the activity level). I started to eat food normally. It didn't come back until after I delivered my first and only son (for now), which is almost 10 years later. Everytime I am near my ultimate goal weight, I binge and gain again. I know it must be the restriction but if I don't restrict, I won't lose weight. I am taking it slowly now though (even if I really want to see the scale go down faster), maybe that will help. I haven't binged for about a month already but I will still be on guard until I am already at my maintenance for a few months (without binging), then that's when I'll say it is really suppressed.0
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Mine started when I learned how to count calories.
I lost 70lbs just by eating healthy and working out and my doctor suggested I started reading calorie labels to make sure I was getting enough food - I wish I never learned what a calorie was because it ruined me.
If I blew my budget by 1 calorie - it was a full on binge fest I would binge then tell myself it was okay because I would exercise or restrict the calories I went over the next day - which would lead to me blowing it all again.
I understand the irony of being on a calorie counting site - but I don't personally count and if I track food I do it in a little book I carry in my purse but most of the time I try to eat in a non-disordered care free way0 -
I was too young to remember. But I always had family members discussing how to make me slim down. Looking back at photos from high school l wasn't big at all. I'll never forgive some of those family members. They've damaged me.
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Mine started when I learned how to count calories.
I lost 70lbs just by eating healthy and working out and my doctor suggested I started reading calorie labels to make sure I was getting enough food - I wish I never learned what a calorie was because it ruined me.
If I blew my budget by 1 calorie - it was a full on binge fest I would binge then tell myself it was okay because I would exercise or restrict the calories I went over the next day - which would lead to me blowing it all again.
I understand the irony of being on a calorie counting site - but I don't personally count and if I track food I do it in a little book I carry in my purse but most of the time I try to eat in a non-disordered care free way
Girl, I feel your pain!! When I started using this I got totally obsessed and also lost 70lbs by counting calories and exercising. Now if I eat over my calories I feel like I might as well just keep going and I binge like crazy.0 -
I feel totally the same - some days I spiral out of control .....
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I started binging as a kid. I would steal food from the cabinet that I wasn't supposed to be eating before dinner..my brothers would find me sitting on the kitchen floor digging into something and would tell my mom (trying not to be specific to avoid triggering others)..
I never struggled with my weight till I got to my freshman year of college...but as soon as no one was looking - I gained 20 pounds in 3 months..I have never been able to keep a really healthy weight since then (and it has been 14 years now..) That being said, I am still happy with my body...it is not perfect and if I wanted to, I could pick out the problems, but I choose to love my body. The binging is a daily struggle, but I feel really good that today will be Day 10 without a binge. I JUST started admitting this to friends and family...maybe being honest (and also trying to be forgiving of myself) has helped me too..0
