Mihani wrote: »

We're both working like crazy but something is going to have to give soon.

Honestly, you have crazy stamina. For me, something would have cracked a LONG time ago!!!

Once I was a manager and all my union employees were on strike, so I had to do overtime and do as much of everyone's job as I could. They were on strike for 9 days. I was a mess. And that was before I had kids, to boot!!!

Laura, that is so stressful. I got goosebumps reading it. I can't imagine how hard it must be right now, but good for you for finding something positive to focus on for a bit (ie. counting calories). It's great your family bands together so well, I hope you find some comfort in them! Hang in there, we are thinking about you. So thankful that there is medication for your Mom to continue living a mostly "normal" life!

Laura you in our prayers.

Finally getting caught up and getting into the groove again. This year my business has really taken off. I am getting to the point I may have to hire someone. For now my Dad has decided to help me out. So, very nice of him.

My parents are visiting for the next 2 weeks and I will work on training my Dad to help me out.
We will be going to Nantucket for a couple of days. Looking forward to that. Even though I have lived in MA for over 20 years I have never been to Nantucket.

Have been pretty strict since Wednesday and I am already feeling better. I do not know what happened but 1 week ago I woke up and my legs, feet and ankles were so swollen Plus i have been getting reflux again. I knew it was time to clean up my act again. I need to take off 10-15 lbs. But it all depends where my body wants to go. I want to try and eat more calories this time and not starve myself. Just focus on this is how I will eat every day.

Well off to make a few dinners: Better Burgers and Mexican Lentils.

Have a nice Sunday super hot here today

Thanks everyone for the kind words and prayers. It means so much to me.

Friday I took mom to see her primary care doctor and to get her blood drawn. Her main doctor came in and basically said "what the heck happened??" He said she now holds the record for most shocking diagnosis. He reiterated how lucky she is to have caught it when she did. Her last blood draw was in 2010, so, it is likely she has been walking around with this for years and didn't even know it. Her blood draw went well. It was hard being there with her, but, she said she appreciated it and said I am going to be her official organizer to ensure everyone is updated on things and all the information on her condition is kept up to date. I told her for every appointment it is probably good to have a second set of ears if possible. I know from my sister that this can be valuable as it can be hard for the person who is the patient to catch everything. We did hang around for the results of her blood tests and were rewarded with good news - her white blood cells are down to 77,000. Last Tuesday they were at 123,000 so, continued progress! The medication appears to have at least stopped all bone marrow production which is allowing her white blood cells to reduce. Which this is still way too high it is much better than what it was before. She has an appointment today to get final results of all the tests and hopefully this will provide the final results needed to get her started on a more permanent medication.

During the appointment with her primary care doctor she brought up information about my grandmother (she is the person who handles their medical conditions) and I found out surprising information. I knew my grandmother was dealing with some heart issues which they are going to have to try to medically fix first, but, found out that based on her latest lab results she is diabetic. It was hard to internalize, but, part of me was like "how many signs do you need in order to understand how important it is for you to take care of yourself Laura??"

Saturday was the first down day we had experienced in the last week and I think everything hit me pretty hard. I spent a large part of the morning out on my deck just crying. It was the first time I had been alone and could actually really let anything out and not feel like I had to be strong or put up a brave front to anyone. I think DH and the kids picked up on the fact that it wasn't a great day and did a good job at giving me my space initially and then distracted me the rest of the day.

We got our grocery shopping done yesterday and am ready for a week of healthy eating and exercising. I am hoping to add more layers of normal back into my life and hopefully it will help me cope a little bit more.

Terri, I'm so happy you posted that mexican lentils recipe - I love everything lentils and I love everything mexican, looks delicious!

Mihani, how is this week looking for you? A bit of peace without the boss around? My work has just been insanity too. I was thinking about you and wondering how you do it year round? For us it only lasts about 5 months at least. How are the hands?

Laura, what a tough situation. I'm glad you got a good cry to yourself too! Sometimes it helps. I'm sure your Mom is so appreciative of all your help too! I hope this week is a better one, and that this sort of becomes more of a new "normal" soon for you guys.

Jean, nice to see you!! What is new and exciting?

I am trying to be better with consistent ETL and intuitive eating. It's always a process and struggle. I made a bunch of food last night, all ETL and SO many veggies, and then I still ended off the meal with chocolate and pb lol. Sigh. I had a bachelorette on the weekend though and aside from a few drinks, I had a totally healthy day. It was weird, I kept thinking, "I did it?!?!" and barely believing it myself. I abstained from ball park junk, brought hummus/pita/veggies and ate those as snacks, and then ordered a salad at the restaurant. So maybe I can do it?!? Lol.

Mmmm, Mexican lentils! Can't say I have made this recipe, but variations on a theme...love it stuffed into peppers. That is one of our family vegan meals...one everyone can agree on!

My TSH is finally...after a year...in "normal" range. And I do feel better. Optimal...no, but maybe I am comparing to my 20 something self, I dunno. Anyway have been more awake lately, hahaha. I am taking August off of classes because I am so burned out on writing papers I can hardly stand myself. I want to have a month of summer to enjoy without thinking I "should" be writing.

I am having a lovely peach off the peach truck, lol! So tasty...I am not into peach flavored things even a little bit, I find them generally awful. But a fresh ripe peach that was picked shortly before getting to me, oh yes!

I think about unexpected diagnosis a lot. But, I work in a place that lends itself to that thing...people always joke about a headache being a brain tumor, but where I work...it often is. Just recently I cared for a woman who ...hit a bunny while riding her bike. She broke her arm badly, but in addition, when we were looking for injuries from the fall, we found all sorts of tumor activity in her head. What's up with that? I find myself often knowing things about people's health and futures before they do, and I often think about those last few hours, those last few minutes, of blissful unawareness before they find out. Heck, I was a just turned 40 year old who thought I had a small GI bleed from taking too much advil for knee pain related to exercise. A day later, being sucked into the vortex that is cancer treatment. It's all a lot to think about.

Hi all. Had a good day yesterday. Though my eating wasn't fantastic I logged it all, so, that is a big step from where I have been. Also came home after stopping to visit with my mom and just desperately wanted to skip my workout. I have not been sleeping well and was just exhausted. But, the more I thought about it and my goals the more I realized that even though I really didn't WANT to do my workout I NEEDED to do my workout. It turned out to be one of my best workouts with 6 2 minute intervals of jogging and hit the two mile mark. I had barely been able to run a full minute two weeks ago and hadn't hit the 2 mile mark yet. One of my goals is to get back to jogging a 5k with no walking. It has been 9 years since I was able to do that and I want it back! I know nutrition is such a key part of that, so, as I tweak things and get it to where it needs to be I am trying to keep that in mind.

Lia - oh my goodness - you are so beautiful! What a wonderful picture. I am so glad the wedding went well.

Jean - glad to hear your TSH levels are normal now. Unexpected diagnosis definitely changes things. For myself, I hadn't ever spent too much time giving it too much thought up until about 6 years ago. At that point, everything in my life changed. Suddenly these started popping up all around us - my FIL received his undetected and advanced colon cancer diagnosis and my sister was diagnosed with breast cancer. It shook my world. It makes me value every moment I have with those I love. I had hoped we were through it all, but, this diagnosis is a huge reminder how important it is to keep doing that.

Terri - the lentils sound delicious! I am definitely noting that down to try. Thanks for sharing.

Mihani - hope you have a good night out with your friend on Thursday. Hopefully it will help relieve some of your stress. Stress is a killer for me too when it comes to my food choices, sleep and workouts. It just seems to kill everything. I love it when my food is a simple and no brainer choice. I think if it were just me I would just have a refrigerator filled with individual pre-measured baggies and containers so I could literally just grab and go!

Well, gotta get to work. Hope everyone has great days!