Thanks everyone for the kind words and prayers. It means so much to me.

Friday I took mom to see her primary care doctor and to get her blood drawn. Her main doctor came in and basically said "what the heck happened??" He said she now holds the record for most shocking diagnosis. He reiterated how lucky she is to have caught it when she did. Her last blood draw was in 2010, so, it is likely she has been walking around with this for years and didn't even know it. Her blood draw went well. It was hard being there with her, but, she said she appreciated it and said I am going to be her official organizer to ensure everyone is updated on things and all the information on her condition is kept up to date. I told her for every appointment it is probably good to have a second set of ears if possible. I know from my sister that this can be valuable as it can be hard for the person who is the patient to catch everything. We did hang around for the results of her blood tests and were rewarded with good news - her white blood cells are down to 77,000. Last Tuesday they were at 123,000 so, continued progress! The medication appears to have at least stopped all bone marrow production which is allowing her white blood cells to reduce. Which this is still way too high it is much better than what it was before. She has an appointment today to get final results of all the tests and hopefully this will provide the final results needed to get her started on a more permanent medication.

During the appointment with her primary care doctor she brought up information about my grandmother (she is the person who handles their medical conditions) and I found out surprising information. I knew my grandmother was dealing with some heart issues which they are going to have to try to medically fix first, but, found out that based on her latest lab results she is diabetic. It was hard to internalize, but, part of me was like "how many signs do you need in order to understand how important it is for you to take care of yourself Laura??"

Saturday was the first down day we had experienced in the last week and I think everything hit me pretty hard. I spent a large part of the morning out on my deck just crying. It was the first time I had been alone and could actually really let anything out and not feel like I had to be strong or put up a brave front to anyone. I think DH and the kids picked up on the fact that it wasn't a great day and did a good job at giving me my space initially and then distracted me the rest of the day.

We got our grocery shopping done yesterday and am ready for a week of healthy eating and exercising. I am hoping to add more layers of normal back into my life and hopefully it will help me cope a little bit more.

Terri, I'm so happy you posted that mexican lentils recipe - I love everything lentils and I love everything mexican, looks delicious!

Mihani, how is this week looking for you? A bit of peace without the boss around? My work has just been insanity too. I was thinking about you and wondering how you do it year round? For us it only lasts about 5 months at least. How are the hands?

Laura, what a tough situation. I'm glad you got a good cry to yourself too! Sometimes it helps. I'm sure your Mom is so appreciative of all your help too! I hope this week is a better one, and that this sort of becomes more of a new "normal" soon for you guys.

Jean, nice to see you!! What is new and exciting?

I am trying to be better with consistent ETL and intuitive eating. It's always a process and struggle. I made a bunch of food last night, all ETL and SO many veggies, and then I still ended off the meal with chocolate and pb lol. Sigh. I had a bachelorette on the weekend though and aside from a few drinks, I had a totally healthy day. It was weird, I kept thinking, "I did it?!?!" and barely believing it myself. I abstained from ball park junk, brought hummus/pita/veggies and ate those as snacks, and then ordered a salad at the restaurant. So maybe I can do it?!? Lol.

Mmmm, Mexican lentils! Can't say I have made this recipe, but variations on a theme...love it stuffed into peppers. That is one of our family vegan meals...one everyone can agree on!

My TSH is finally...after a year...in "normal" range. And I do feel better. Optimal...no, but maybe I am comparing to my 20 something self, I dunno. Anyway have been more awake lately, hahaha. I am taking August off of classes because I am so burned out on writing papers I can hardly stand myself. I want to have a month of summer to enjoy without thinking I "should" be writing.

I am having a lovely peach off the peach truck, lol! So tasty...I am not into peach flavored things even a little bit, I find them generally awful. But a fresh ripe peach that was picked shortly before getting to me, oh yes!

I think about unexpected diagnosis a lot. But, I work in a place that lends itself to that thing...people always joke about a headache being a brain tumor, but where I work...it often is. Just recently I cared for a woman who ...hit a bunny while riding her bike. She broke her arm badly, but in addition, when we were looking for injuries from the fall, we found all sorts of tumor activity in her head. What's up with that? I find myself often knowing things about people's health and futures before they do, and I often think about those last few hours, those last few minutes, of blissful unawareness before they find out. Heck, I was a just turned 40 year old who thought I had a small GI bleed from taking too much advil for knee pain related to exercise. A day later, being sucked into the vortex that is cancer treatment. It's all a lot to think about.

Hi all. Had a good day yesterday. Though my eating wasn't fantastic I logged it all, so, that is a big step from where I have been. Also came home after stopping to visit with my mom and just desperately wanted to skip my workout. I have not been sleeping well and was just exhausted. But, the more I thought about it and my goals the more I realized that even though I really didn't WANT to do my workout I NEEDED to do my workout. It turned out to be one of my best workouts with 6 2 minute intervals of jogging and hit the two mile mark. I had barely been able to run a full minute two weeks ago and hadn't hit the 2 mile mark yet. One of my goals is to get back to jogging a 5k with no walking. It has been 9 years since I was able to do that and I want it back! I know nutrition is such a key part of that, so, as I tweak things and get it to where it needs to be I am trying to keep that in mind.

Lia - oh my goodness - you are so beautiful! What a wonderful picture. I am so glad the wedding went well.

Jean - glad to hear your TSH levels are normal now. Unexpected diagnosis definitely changes things. For myself, I hadn't ever spent too much time giving it too much thought up until about 6 years ago. At that point, everything in my life changed. Suddenly these started popping up all around us - my FIL received his undetected and advanced colon cancer diagnosis and my sister was diagnosed with breast cancer. It shook my world. It makes me value every moment I have with those I love. I had hoped we were through it all, but, this diagnosis is a huge reminder how important it is to keep doing that.

Terri - the lentils sound delicious! I am definitely noting that down to try. Thanks for sharing.

Mihani - hope you have a good night out with your friend on Thursday. Hopefully it will help relieve some of your stress. Stress is a killer for me too when it comes to my food choices, sleep and workouts. It just seems to kill everything. I love it when my food is a simple and no brainer choice. I think if it were just me I would just have a refrigerator filled with individual pre-measured baggies and containers so I could literally just grab and go!

Well, gotta get to work. Hope everyone has great days!

Wow, beautiful wedding pictures!

Hey, thanks so much you guys, you're the best It was a gorgeous spot at a conservation centre, so we have all these cool green and nature pics!! thankfully we had an hour or two before the rain started.

Yesterday I had my first totally ETL day in foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrr. I feel so proud of myself, even though that's kind of silly. But I didn't have any sugar, which lately, has been a big feat (again). It gives me enough confidence to take me through today. I've got a healthy day planned again.

I have ANOTHER bachelorette this weekend. Luckily my girlfriends are also on health streaks, but alcohol will be the real danger. Wish me luck.

Laura, wow, great job with the run!! I love those realizations (like, "hey, I'm actually doing it!"). Sounds like you're not far off from a 5k. I miss running too lately, I'm going to look into a C25k program.

Mihani, yes, stress is the biggest trigger. I look to food as relief and also junk food as an excuse because I have no time or energy. I'm trying to take a page from your book and get back to trying new smoothies. Tomorrow I'm going to try OSG's Hidden Greens Chocolate Protein Smoothie.

Jean, that must be really hard working where you work. I worry about unexpected death a lot! But luckily I am ignorant to all the unexpected illnesses and diagnoses that there are out there. It would be tough doing that day in and day out. How are you feeling today? Your peach sounded tasty!

Hope you guys all have a lovely Thursday

Hello all!

I'm still not 100% etl, but I've been getting progressively better the last 3 weeks. It's good. I'm gaining confidence here, too... (A theme for the month, I think!)

I've renewed my interest in my food consumption. I think I'll be doing better again for the next little while, at least. I'm armed with a bunch of new recipes to try - I've been printing them out and looking ahead on the calendar. As long as I have access to my blender, food processor and good grocery stores, I should be okay for the next couple of months!! I'm actually excited all over again, so that's a good thing...

Today I tried a brand new smoothie and it was great! So I'll share:
1 cup coconut water
2 bananas
2 cups spinach
2.5 cups frozen dark cherries

So tasty!!

Last night I made myself a chia seed drink with coconut water, the juice of 2 limes, and some pure maple syrup. Left it in the fridge overnight to have mid-morning for when I get hungry before lunch. It was a very interesting little treat - something different from normal water. And it did the trick - it held me over until noon. Might have to use that trick a few more times while I get back into the swing of things... Actually, I was supposed to use coconut sap, but I couldn't find it here locally (at least not in a pinch - will have to drive around and see if anyone carries it).

Tomorrow I'm going to try an avocado chia seed chocolate pudding for an afternoon snack, I think... I know Dr. F doesn't want us to snack, but I truly haven't been making it until supper time of late - in fact, as I write this, I'm wondering if I have anything for a snack in my desk...

Not sure what I'm making myself for supper just yet... Lunch was just some raw veggies and a piece of garlic toast (there's my starchy carb for the day!!)

Good morning, I'm new to this group. Have been following "Joel" for a while, on and off....Hit it hard about a week ago and am doing the 6 week aggressive start....Once I made it through the detox symptoms from the caffeine withdrawal, I was good to go.

I am just getting back on mfp after a long absence, my niece wanted friends on here, so I thought I'd give it a go, wasn't sure how the numbers would look with ETL.

Here is a normal day for me: Up early, hot lemon water, 2 mile walk w/ dog. B: either veggie/fruit smoothie w/ flax, hemp and unsweetened almond milk or quinoa w/ nuts and berries. Lunch: huge GBOMB salad or soup and fruit. Dinner: Huge salad, either soup or something I've made from the ETL cookbook. Getting used to no snacks was a little iffy, but I made it through week 1 and didn't die, so there ya go

Have a great day, hope to get to know some of my fellow "nutes". I will try to go back and read up later today.

Marci

Hi all. Checking in. Mom had her first check up yesterday after starting her new chemotherapy routine. Thankfully, there was good news that came from it. All the test results came back and it showed that she had the "Philadelphia gene" which means the medication they chose for her should be the perfect match for the type of Leukemia she is dealing with. Her white blood count was down to 6,700 from a high of 217,000 nearly two weeks ago and is now considered to be in the "normal" range. Her muscle and joint pain was slightly better yesterday, though, she is still having a really hard time sleeping and is still pretty exhausted. She did get the "ok" to take Motrin for her joint pain which is a big step. So, while we are still dealing with the aftershock of all of this at least we can take some solace in knowing that she is on the right treatment plan and we are hoping she gets to remission status by Halloween. Fingers crossed!

I had a total kick butt workout yesterday, was covered in sweat, out of breath and smiling from ear to ear. I am still doing a walk/run workout with some really steep incline work at the end. When I started this routine at the beginning of the month I was barely getting through jogging a full minute at 4mph and barely made it through the eight one minute intervals. Yesterday I ran a total of 18 minutes and had one stretch where I went a full 4 minutes jogging. I am so encouraged to see so much progress. I am looking to get all my jogging intervals to 4 minutes and eventually increase it to being able to jog an entire 5K without stopping. After that I will likely start working on my speed. Feels awesome to have a plan! Tonight I plan to tackle my other love - Tae Bo. I haven't done this in a very long time, but, the combination of these two workouts along with logging my food is what worked for me before, so, hopefully I see the similar results this time.

I had kind of let things go at home food wise due to push back from the family. But, decided late last week that if I am going to be the one working all day, fitting in a work out and then cooking I am going to cook the way I need to cook and folks will just have to cope with eating healthier versions of the food they like. I found a site that had a lot of crock pot recipes that you basically can just put all the ingredients in a bag, freeze it and then dump it in the crock pot whenever you need to. I am hoping to have a couple healthy crock pot meals each week, let my daughter (who is my health conscious buddy) cook one day and then have simple meals for the remaining days. This way I can come home, get my workout in and have dinner at a decent time. My daughter is 12 now and has had some cooking ventures herself, so, she decided she wanted to pitch in and help us stay out of the "let's just order something out" pitfall. So, I plan to teach her a lot and rely on her. Being the only girls in the house it is kind of nice to know we have each others backs. She wants to be my running buddy once I get to the point that I can keep up with her too.

Anyhow, that's about it from my corner of the world. Feeling stronger and more in control every day. It's a really good place to be right now.

Mihani, I hear ya! I feel like this body has never exercised ever! The last program I did was T25! It was from beachbody. I bought it used off of ebay I think. I started Insanity Max 30 on Monday and omg I'm still very sore. It really was a bit pathetic but I was proud of myself for trying at least.

Peas, I agree - I like that End of Dieting is more about recognizing that it's not as simple as "just stop eating sugar, junk, etc." but there is a lot more mentally involved.

I tried making smoothie bowls for breakfast the last two days which have been pretty good! Nice and filling and like eating cereal but it's all fruit/nuts/granola/seeds.

Morning all! Getting in my workout last night was a true struggle. I was tired and just feeling very burned out. Only three days of laser focus and I could feel myself just totally drained. Suddenly the world seemed to just be pushing in on me. My new motto with working out is "when you don't feel like working out those are the times you really need to work out" so, I got changed and hit the treadmill. My runs were harder than Monday and I only got in 17 minutes total, which, I was kind of bummed about. Then I flipped to the front of my notebook I use to log my workouts and noticed the first entry earlier this month where I was struggling through running a total of 4 minutes in 30 second intervals. Suddenly it really hit me just how great I have done this month. Made me realize that while the runs yesterday were hard and I didn't have that "high" getting off the treadmill it was still a huge success! I can run a full 2-4 minutes straight now versus 30 seconds. Made me smile.

I had a very unsuccessful discussion with DH last night. I tried to just be very upfront with him and tell him that I really felt like dinner was an uphill battle. That every night I say I don't want to eat out he gets all prickly. I told him I felt like he was just completely disengaged from the whole dinner process to the point that I don't even ask him to help anymore. I also tried to explain how he says he is being supportive but his actions when it comes to dinner don't really reflect what he is saying. I explained how important his support was to me. He replied with the fact that he encourages me to go workout, he doesn't say anything about eating later but that yeah...he would rather just pick up the phone and order a pizza. It is simple, it is easy, it is always perfect and you don't have to even think about it. He said he just doesn't want to be involved in the dinner process at all. I just sat there and felt like my heart was breaking as I realized again that I just couldn't rely on him. I guess I had hoped, through all his talk, for more support on the dinner front. Realizing over and over that I just am going to be working full time, working out, fixing dinner, cleaning up and everything else...sigh...sometimes it just gets to be a little much. I am just trying to focus on the fact that these are my goals, my changes and my choices - not his. So, I told him he should feel free to order dinner whenever he wants, but, that I won't be eating out more than once a week. So, if he orders something he needs to understand I will be eating something I make myself at home. I. just. can't. live. that. life. any. more. I figure I have a pretty good game plan in place with the crock pot meals and my daughter. Even my oldest son isn't opposed to helping with dinner. So, they will just be my little group of supporters and helpers. I just need to stop expecting DH to change or be things that he's not I guess. Maybe one day all this will wear off on him.

Anyhow.

Today will be another Tae Bo day and Friday my last run/walk day of the week. I am thinking Saturday I may spend the morning cleaning my bike and go for a good long bike ride. Six days in a row working out!!! Whooo Hooo! I am also going to make some trips out to look at some used weights to add to my collection. We have a Play it Again Sports near us that I plan to go check out. I would really like to get a weight bench and maybe some kettle bells...possibly some more dumbbells - and, I would like to get them cheap! Sunday will be another prep day with some more crock pot meals put together and probably a rest day from working out.

OK - back to work I go. Have great day's everyone!