How do you set your goals?
nilklynn
Posts: 61 Member
I'm working on a goal reset. How do you determine yours?
My original goal was to weigh x at 6months post op. I'm close. +2.7. Which is almost nothing if I look at how far I've come. I'm still fighting the failure feeling. Wednesday marks 6 months.
Number wise, I would like to lose another 13 by mid March. That would put me at -150. March marks 1 year since I first weighed in at the clinic. Holy smokes! That's an average sized human. But the weight loss is slowing and it may not be realistic. That's hard to wrap my head around. I still have 30 lbs to lose just to make it into the 'overweight' category. 50 to my personal goal. Gah.
My surgeon said to me "now that you've successfully lost the weight, where do you see yourself in a year?" I stared at him blankly. I have no idea. I'm not done. Nor do I know where to go from here.
My head knows I need to stop focusing on the number and that my loss is going to slow. I'm meeting with a trainer on Tuesday, and I'm going to try to focus on getting my body healthy rather than fixating on the scale. My body image is horrible. People tell me that I look great or beautiful and rather than taking the compliment with grace I become bitter; I'm still me. I was ugly before? Weight determines beauty? It's all sorts of messed up. I don't know how to fix it. Or how to break it down into mental goals?
That's the end of my rant.
So how do you determine your goals?
My original goal was to weigh x at 6months post op. I'm close. +2.7. Which is almost nothing if I look at how far I've come. I'm still fighting the failure feeling. Wednesday marks 6 months.
Number wise, I would like to lose another 13 by mid March. That would put me at -150. March marks 1 year since I first weighed in at the clinic. Holy smokes! That's an average sized human. But the weight loss is slowing and it may not be realistic. That's hard to wrap my head around. I still have 30 lbs to lose just to make it into the 'overweight' category. 50 to my personal goal. Gah.
My surgeon said to me "now that you've successfully lost the weight, where do you see yourself in a year?" I stared at him blankly. I have no idea. I'm not done. Nor do I know where to go from here.
My head knows I need to stop focusing on the number and that my loss is going to slow. I'm meeting with a trainer on Tuesday, and I'm going to try to focus on getting my body healthy rather than fixating on the scale. My body image is horrible. People tell me that I look great or beautiful and rather than taking the compliment with grace I become bitter; I'm still me. I was ugly before? Weight determines beauty? It's all sorts of messed up. I don't know how to fix it. Or how to break it down into mental goals?
That's the end of my rant.
So how do you determine your goals? 0
Replies
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I stopped putting a time frame on it after the third time I "missed" a goal, which really wasn't a miss. Since weight loss happens when it happens, it wasn't a missed goal. It just wasn't a goal I could make happen in the time frame I set. Big whoop, I'm still losing.
My only goal for weight loss with a time frame is to get to 150 by August 19th. I'm 159 now and that's a reasonable goal. I'm not betting anything on it, but I can see that it's an attainable goal. My goal these days is that I dangle the "5lb carrot" meaning when I get to a goal weight, I'll decide then if I want to lose 5 more pounds. And then I will. It might take me a month or a year, but I'll do it.
For me, putting a time frame on something over which I have almost no control will guarantee feelings of failure and hopelessness, neither of which will be beneficial to me in any way. So I just won't do it. Would I like to be at my 120lb goal weight by the end of 2016? Sure. Is 39lbs in 12 months possible? Sure. Am I making that a goal? Oh heck no. With my 5lb carrot, I'll continue to decide if 120lbs is my final goal when I get to 125lbs. Right now, my goal is 155lbs in whatever time frame my body decides is right. I'm eating macros spot-on. It'll happen when it happens.0 -
I also fail at weight loss goals. I've learned to go with how I feel, because the scale will let you down! Yes, weight loss slows, the closer to goal you get (it truly does!)! I've found that as long as I stick to my eating plan I lose inches, and feel great! This is my motivation! If the scale decides to move, it's wonderful, but I don't fret if it doesn't!0
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YEah, after the initial 'easy' losses I stopped keeping track of how long it took me to get to a certain weight and just promised myself I'd be getting there at some point. My goals switched almost entirely to fitness goals - generally about increasing intensity of workouts. For a while it was about distance. How far could I swim/bike/walk in 60 mins? Now it's about weight... how many reps can I do with xxlbs on the bar or in the kettlebell? When it warms up, I'll probably switch back to a distance-oriented goal. Or maybe a time oriented one, like how fast can I swim 20 laps? How long does it take me to do a mile?
I'm not very good at focusing on a bunch of things at once, so I do strength for a while, speed for a while, length of workouts for a while. It works well with the season change - I have more time in the summer to do whatever and winter I'm mostly confined to inside stuff. Anyway, that's a long way to say that at some point - which for me was when I was about 5-10 lbs away from being just overweight on the BMI - the loss itself was no longer motivating and I had to start setting non-weightloss goals and focusing on them. The weight is still coming off, just slower. But I can see muscle replacing fat so I don't worry about it. I just focus on doing more reps or distance or whatever. The hard part is making time and not getting bored.
And very little of my focus is on eating perfectly or restricting calories too much. It's all about burning them. I need to buckle down and get back on the more protein train to keep seeing results but I don't sweat having too many carbs now and then since I know I'm putting them to use. And not being overly focused on food going in makes me feel more relaxed and less neurotic. I can have a bad relationship with obsessing over counting food. It's not good for me mentally to be totally inflexible. The workouts give me some room not to have to be perfect and in return I have less cravings and whatnot.0 -
I agree with @blairmundy - unless it's a HUGE weight goal (like the 100-lb. mark I REALLY just wanted to hit), I tend to make my goals fitness oriented. As long as the scale is moving downward, I try not to obsess on the numbers. Now that I'm getting closer and closer to my overall goal, I'm looking more towards things like trying to increase muscle strength to help with loose skin and things like that. I'm also looking to improve running times and making sure my GOOD fitness habits are ingrained so I don't fall off the wagon.0
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I'm struggling with setting goals myself. I'm only 2 weeks post op Bypass and I wonder what's a reasonable expectation at 6 months out? 60 lbs? 80? I have no clue! Lol0
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I'm struggling with setting goals myself. I'm only 2 weeks post op Bypass and I wonder what's a reasonable expectation at 6 months out? 60 lbs? 80? I have no clue! Lol
At that point, I was setting goals based on getting in all my protein and water. That was hard enough! The weight loss will come regardless as long as you're following the guidelines set out for you. I added in some walking goals as time went on (which led to working out regularly).0 -
cmchandler74 wrote: »I'm struggling with setting goals myself. I'm only 2 weeks post op Bypass and I wonder what's a reasonable expectation at 6 months out? 60 lbs? 80? I have no clue! Lol
At that point, I was setting goals based on getting in all my protein and water. That was hard enough! The weight loss will come regardless as long as you're following the guidelines set out for you. I added in some walking goals as time went on (which led to working out regularly).
Yes. So much yes!0
