Ok after a few months of crazy and trying to get back on track - I decided to reinvent myself - I had a hissy fit with myself and deleted my old MFP account (Carnivorekat) was just so annoyed with myself I didn't want to see how badly I had been - I have managed to calm myself down and I have decided to start fresh - so if anyone wants to re-add me, or if anyone wants a friend for support would be good to have you.

I am getting back on the ZC wagon and going to push myself harder than I have ever done before