Advice for Someone "Severely Obese"
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One of those things that is a plus for the LCHF diet is that it presents as fairly manly to those who think about such things. I mean you are eating bacon and steak and cheese. There is not the same social stigma associated with this diet around the guys.3
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So week two of my BF doing low carb just wrapped up, starting week three. He weighed himself Sunday morning but didn't note the actual number. I'm not concerned with the actual number or really the weight at all as long as he feels well, is happy and there is an overall downward trend either on the scale or body fat composition. He's finding it surprisingly easy to eat this way and he's beginning to love Jimmy John unwiches which is my favorite fast food low carb option. He even asked last week for me to email him some of my favorite recipes for him to print out. He's going to try to get his dad to eat this way (whom he lives with). Also, his best friend and his wife mentioned the other day that they've been eating keto for a few weeks(?) now. Lastly, his "best" work friend wants to start eating low carb as well. So that's great since I can't be there these people can't keep each other all a little more accountable and hopefully be good influences for one another.
Anyways, back to weighing himself Sunday. I forgot to ask him about it until this morning so he didn't remember the actual number but knew that it went down. He sounded discouraged though and stated that "It was only a few pounds. I think my water is still adjusting". I told him a few pounds is great. Heck even a half a pound is great if his scale can measure in small increments. I think he was saddened that it wasn't upwards of 5+ pounds because the first few days he saw that initial 10 lb water weight loss (which I told him at the start would happen and that the weight loss would slow after the first week). I also told him not to focus on the scale. So hopefully this week he is still just as motivated to keep eating this way and starts to understand how to handle the information that comes out on the scale.
@bowlerae - That is so incredibly awesome... Having others not only know about this dietary plan - but to be following it? That normalizes what he's doing, somehow makes it easier to accept and less "insane" feeling. I hope he continues doing well. And the fact that he's asking for recipes? That is fabulous. And the scale bumps are the easiest way to quantify losses, and it's generally what we've all been indoctrinated to believe.
Something that might help is to remind him that losing weight too fast makes it harder to keep off long term, makes it harder to tighten up skin, and is a hard rate to maintain, etc. If he loses more than 2-3 pounds a week consistently, he's going to end up having to go to his doctor to check in to make sure he's not overtaxing another system. Remind him to focus on needing a belt or to tighten his belt. I think we'd all rather look "sexier" than worry about some mythical number on a scale that really doesn't mean much at all....5 -
@bowlerae you are right on as far as looking at the trend. Maybe have him look at it like the stock market only backwards. Ideally the stock market would go up every single day (assuming you invest in it like in a 401k), but in reality, there will be ups and downs over the long term, but as long as the ups are more frequent and/or bigger than the downs, in the long run you will be much better off.
The human body is way to complex to expect a completely steady even drop day after day or even week after week. It will be a jagged line, but the trend should be good.
@2t9nty hit it on the head that this is the manliest of "diets" ever. The fact I get to eat meat at every meal would make it worth it even without the other health benefits.
Along the lines of what @KnitOrMiss said, he does not want to go down so fast as to mess up his metabolism like the Biggest Loser study that came out recently. If that wasn't enough, if you look at all the guys on the Biggest Loser at the end with the saggy man boobs, that is enough to make any self respecting guy think slower is better and focusing on firming as you go is important.4 -
What motivates (me) is desperation. I hit 360lb & I'm a 5'-8" male. I'm down to 316lb in 2-1/2 months. I've made a lifestyle change, not a diet. It's either this or die. I passed out at church one time, rushed to ER. That's motivation enough. Wife & kids thought I had died right then and there.
Two tips is all I can give:
1. Read & do Jimmy Moore's book Keto Clarity
2. Read & do Dr. Fung's book Complete Guide to Fasting.
Understanding insulin resistance has been a tremendous breakthrough for me. I see a cardiologist regularly who happens to be the one that gave me the two bits of advice Iist above. I can't thank him enough.7 -
@bowlerae - Any updates for us on your boyfriend's progress?2
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My BMI was 43 and at 277 and I was 110 pounds overweight. I have made at least 11 attempts to lose weight since 2007. I got down to 170 in 2009. But gained it all back plus some. I'm 224 today and still working it.
He can't do it if you are making him. He has to want to do it. The best thing he has going is his age. In 30 years it gets much tougher.
Learn what it's like to be hungry. Water fast for a few days. He'll learn. Then only eat when you're hungry. Eat slowly and stop when you are full.
Don't weigh your food or count calories.
Choose what method suits him best. LCHF or low calorie, or vegan or whatever. They all work to some extent. It doesn't really matter. They all fail too. The goal is not the scale or to religiously stick to the plan. The goal should be to find a way to eat and drink that you can drop a pound or two a week for the rest of his life and be satisfied and happy doing it.
It took a long time to get fat, so it's going to take a long time to get skinny.
Good luck!
Cheers2 -
One foot in front of the other, every single day. Just get started, learn as you go. Never stop.
If you have a lot of weight to lose, it must be your priority! I've lost 120 pounds.
Best of luck on this path.5 -
@bowlerae - Any updates on your guy?1
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