Gave in to peer pressure
pitbullmamaliz
Posts: 303 Member
Tonight at work some of my staff brought in little miniature key lime pies and a birthday cake. I was standing strong but they were so persistent that I gave in. The little round key lime pie was REALLY good, and I should have stopped there. But noooooo, I decided to eat a piece of cake, minus the frosting. Shouldn't have. Bleh. Immediately after I ate it I just had this horrid chemical taste in my mouth. Was NOT worth the obscene number of carbs.
But oh well, it's the first slip up I've had since I started this WOE of March 9th, and I allowed it to happen, and the best part is that I don't have any desire to go back for more pie or cake. So I'm calling it a success in an odd manner.
But oh well, it's the first slip up I've had since I started this WOE of March 9th, and I allowed it to happen, and the best part is that I don't have any desire to go back for more pie or cake. So I'm calling it a success in an odd manner.
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Just move on from there. It's all you can do.
Very few of us have not slipped up. Success is had by getting right back to it.1 -
Jason Fung, although advocating intermittent fasting and fasting, says that this is real life - there will always be birthdays, Easter, meeting with friends, etc - which we should partake to. The rest of the time we can adhere to whatever protocol we are following.4
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I'm surprised in this day and age that people are still exerting peer pressure to get others to eat what they've already said they don't want. Unless your fellow workers are illiterate peasants without access to television, they ought to know better. Next time, just smile knowingly and move on. This is unacceptable behavior.
But then at my age I've long perfected The Look: the one with the one raised eyebrow and faint air of condescending superiority. Practice it yourself and be amazed at the results.6 -
mandycat223 wrote: »But then at my age I've long perfected The Look: the one with the one raised eyebrow and faint air of condescending superiority. Practice it yourself and be amazed at the results.
Try it wearing a clergy collar. With dietary stuff, I think most folks assume the priest is on some nutcase observance that is on the church calendar somewhere, and they don't ask again after a polite, "It looks good but I think I will pass."
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mandycat223 wrote: »But then at my age I've long perfected The Look: the one with the one raised eyebrow and faint air of condescending superiority. Practice it yourself and be amazed at the results.
Try it wearing a clergy collar. With dietary stuff, I think most folks assume the priest is on some nutcase observance that is on the church calendar somewhere, and they don't ask again after a polite, "It looks good but I think I will pass."
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I think it's all in the mindset. Over the last year and half I've had a few non-keto treats. I don't view them as cheats. I think "it's my birthday and I'll have lasagna and cake". No leftovers because the next day is not my birthday! ;p I admit it's easier for me because I'm celiac and most the treats people bring in are not safe for me to eat. I think my life would be a lot harder if my coworkers started gluten free baking but I think it's safe to say that won't be happening anytime soon! lol
Also I really, really love what I eat most days. I love a bunless cheeseburger or a ribeye. I like having real cream in my coffee. I like using full fat mayo, sour cream, and salad dressing. That gives me enough satisfaction that the sugary stuff isn't so appealing.5 -
mandycat223 wrote: »I'm surprised in this day and age that people are still exerting peer pressure to get others to eat what they've already said they don't want. Unless your fellow workers are illiterate peasants without access to television, they ought to know better. Next time, just smile knowingly and move on. This is unacceptable behavior.
But then at my age I've long perfected The Look: the one with the one raised eyebrow and faint air of condescending superiority. Practice it yourself and be amazed at the results.
@mandycat223 - you're kidding, right? Personally, I find it FAR WORSE now, as everyone tries to justify their own bad choices, and they provide love by way of food - it's generally a family/old world type of thinking. If you reject my pies, you reject me, etc. Besides, if you, "the good one," eat, that assuages their guilt, etc.
I think it comes down to immaturity, a lack of true understanding of emotional constructs, and a lack of respect for persons/personal beliefs, etc.
P.S. Love the Spock mental image there.4 -
mandycat223 wrote: ».....But then at my age I've long perfected The Look: the one with the one raised eyebrow and faint air of condescending superiority. Practice it yourself and be amazed at the results.
I'm fortunate in that I can 'Spock the Eyebrows' on both sides. I reserve the Raised Left eyebrow for family. The Raised Right
eyebrow is for friends and acquaintances.
The Raised Left, is more cynical, derisive and dismissive. My family deserves it. It's ok, they know me, they can take it....
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I am reminded of a story I read. A woman who had just turned 110 (or thereabouts) was being interviewed by the local TV station. When asked what the best thing about being that old was, her reply was, "no peer pressure."6
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I am incredibly envious of those of you who can do the Spock eyebrow! I always feel like I'm achieving it but when I check the mirror, alack and alas, it's not successful. There must be some exercises I can do to make that work!
They were my staff and they like me as a boss, so it was very friendly peer pressure. I could have persisted, but I figured one "off plan" treat in nearly a month wouldn't kill me. And it didn't. I felt bloaty and fat, but my weight wad down .2 this morning. No harm no foul! And I like knowing that it wasn't worth it, which will make it even easier next time to "just say no!"1 -
mandycat223 wrote: »But then at my age I've long perfected The Look: the one with the one raised eyebrow and faint air of condescending superiority. Practice it yourself and be amazed at the results.
Condescending superiority? Isn't that a bit too much?
Inviting other people to enjoy foods or drinks is an hospitable gesture that is common to most, if not all, cultures around the globe.
When people do this, they're trying to be nice. And, let's be honest, it's not like they're pushing you to do crack cocaine with them, it's just cake, a treat that they're assuming everyone will enjoy.
I'd say it's more polite to excuse yourself saying you have some allergy or intolerance, or if they are close to you, just be honest and say you're off carbs and eating a whole bunch of them in one go will derail you
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pacific904 wrote: »Jason Fung, although advocating intermittent fasting and fasting, says that this is real life - there will always be birthdays, Easter, meeting with friends, etc - which we should partake to. The rest of the time we can adhere to whatever protocol we are following.
Hmm, I don't know.
Does real life for reformed smokers and drinkers require puffing on the back porch with your cousin and a beer in your hand?
Not really sold on this idea...3 -
Hmm, I don't know.
Does real life for reformed smokers and drinkers require puffing on the back porch with your cousin and a beer in your hand?
Not really sold on this idea...
I'd say a cigarette with your cousin on the back porch doesn't sound like a special occasion at all, but if that same reformed smoker travels to Cuba, treating himself to a nice Cuban cigar would be perfectly acceptable to me. And since it's a one-off experience, I don't think there's a big chance of relapsing
Still not the best of comparisons since smoking is plainly bad for you on all levels, eating a piece of cake or a bowl of fruit is not as pernicious
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NoortjeGrolsch wrote: »mandycat223 wrote: »But then at my age I've long perfected The Look: the one with the one raised eyebrow and faint air of condescending superiority. Practice it yourself and be amazed at the results.
Condescending superiority? Isn't that a bit too much?
Inviting other people to enjoy foods or drinks is an hospitable gesture that is common to most, if not all, cultures around the globe.
When people do this, they're trying to be nice. And, let's be honest, it's not like they're pushing you to do crack cocaine with them, it's just cake, a treat that they're assuming everyone will enjoy.
I'd say it's more polite to excuse yourself saying you have some allergy or intolerance, or if they are close to you, just be honest and say you're off carbs and eating a whole bunch of them in one go will derail you
This would be the ideal, however, a lot of people don't accept "thanks, but no thanks" and often when you add in the reason you open yourself up to all sorts of questions and comments. Not always but it happens often enough that it can make things tense. Its polite to offer someone food, its rude to keep pushing when someone has declined.1 -
pitbullmamaliz wrote: »I am incredibly envious of those of you who can do the Spock eyebrow! I always feel like I'm achieving it but when I check the mirror, alack and alas, it's not successful. There must be some exercises I can do to make that work!
They were my staff and they like me as a boss, so it was very friendly peer pressure. I could have persisted, but I figured one "off plan" treat in nearly a month wouldn't kill me. And it didn't. I felt bloaty and fat, but my weight wad down .2 this morning. No harm no foul! And I like knowing that it wasn't worth it, which will make it even easier next time to "just say no!"
Once in awhile just makes you human.1 -
Peer pressure is fascinating and impacts every individual and group differently.pitbullmamaliz wrote: »But oh well, it's the first slip up I've had since I started this WOE of March 9th, and I allowed it to happen, and the best part is that I don't have any desire to go back for more pie or cake. So I'm calling it a success in an odd manner.
The important thing in my opinion is what you said at the very end. YOU decided to give in, YOU learned something, and ultimately YOU made a successful decision for yourself in the future. Nothing about what happend was random, or thoughtless on your part and that's what's important. Good for you for finding out more about yourself!!
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If it is my real friends, they understand, since my diet is working and I have been very vocal about it, especially since I have to shop for new clothing in lower sizes.2
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NoortjeGrolsch wrote: »Hmm, I don't know.
Does real life for reformed smokers and drinkers require puffing on the back porch with your cousin and a beer in your hand?
Not really sold on this idea...
I'd say a cigarette with your cousin on the back porch doesn't sound like a special occasion at all, but if that same reformed smoker travels to Cuba, treating himself to a nice Cuban cigar would be perfectly acceptable to me. And since it's a one-off experience, I don't think there's a big chance of relapsing
Still not the best of comparisons since smoking is plainly bad for you on all levels, eating a piece of cake or a bowl of fruit is not as pernicious
Good points.
First off, I would cave on the Cuban cigar. Just getting that it out of the way.
But 1 piece of cake for a diabetic vs. 1 cig for an ex - smoker?
Neither will kill you, it's the company they keep; the human race has very few mutants (maybe you're one ??) who can embrace temptation but once.....0 -
I don't understand the pressure to eat either. My only guess is it make others feel less guilty about indulging. With my group of friends I get more pressure when I'm not drinking cocktails. One of my friends, who pesters me the most said to me one time " Your more fun when you drink." My reply was, "Your more fun when I drink too!" Shut him right up!! Haha!
I try to remember how I feel after having those "bad" foods and it makes me less tempted the next time!! Live and learn!!3 -
OMG, great line.0
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Ditto regarding the great line!! I quit drinking totally and quit overeating at the same time, October of 2013. When with friends, I have gotten far more comments about my "lack" of eating than lack of drinking. It seems it is more ok to not drink than it is to not hover over a table covered with appetizers.
Whoever mentioned "guilt" above- that has been my experience. No one really comments about me not scarfing something down but rather they "shouldn't" be doing it.0 -
Ditto regarding the great line!! I quit drinking totally and quit overeating at the same time, October of 2013. When with friends, I have gotten far more comments about my "lack" of eating than lack of drinking. It seems it is more ok to not drink than it is to not hover over a table covered with appetizers.
Whoever mentioned "guilt" above- that has been my experience. No one really comments about me not scarfing something down but rather they "shouldn't" be doing it.
I concur with this part. I have found it is common to hear statements about how well I eat and how they know they shouldn't have it but they "can't help it" or "but it tastes so good I can't resist" or some other equally self condemning line.
Peer pressure comes almost exclusively as the result of someone knowing they are not making the best choice for themselves and thinking the more other people do it, the less guilt they will feel. It is the old "misery loves company" mindset.0 -
I get the guilt but its camouflaged as pressure covered in politeness. "Have some cake" "Not today, thanks" "Oh, come on, live a little, one piece won't hurt" "Yeah, but I'm planning to go out this weekend and I'm saving my carbs" "Are you sure you don't want any? Its really good" and so on. Like I said, once is polite. To keep on once a person has said no is rude.1
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LowCarb4Me2016 wrote: »I get the guilt but its camouflaged as pressure covered in politeness. "Have some cake" "Not today, thanks" "Oh, come on, live a little, one piece won't hurt" "Yeah, but I'm planning to go out this weekend and I'm saving my carbs" "Are you sure you don't want any? Its really good" and so on. Like I said, once is polite. To keep on once a person has said no is rude.
How about, "After you! Have a shot of Cod Liver Oil/Drano/Roundup?"0 -
Just say you are Insulin Resistant and cannot have any sugar or carbs. The term insulin resistant will scare the you know what out of them and they will never pressure you again0
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The very few times I was being "coaxed" to eat something I would just end it with something like: "How is your son doing? Will he be moving to campus or living off campus"?
Food conversation over.1