Have you been criticized for not doing it the "hard" way?
Options
Replies
-
Wow @clcmfp Great insight “Surgery didn’t make losing easier, it just gave me a fighting chance to keep the weight off.” That’s good for me to keep in mind. It’s a marathon not a sprint like they say.
5 -
@clcmfp YEESSS on so many levels. I only partially did surgery to help lose the weight but I'm 27 so I did surgery because I need to keep the weight off for another 50 years (knock on wood) and I wanted to give myself to tool to help me do that. It's not going to be easy to maintain long term but at least I feel like I have a chance.
I also feel like it didn't give me an advantage but put me on a level playing field as every one else. For the first time in my life, I feel like I eat "normal" human portions and am satisfied. For the first time in my life I have a "normal" relationship with food.5 -
I read the follow up post with her 'apology' and it was still so full of judgement, I decided I have no interest in reading any more of her posts. Then the follow up comments... it was painful, how if we would just put down the donuts and not eat a dozen at a time we'd be fine and not need surgery. I don't know about you but I never in my life ate a dozen donuts at a time.
Some of us face challenges beyond what we are willing to talk about with internet strangers and after years and years of trying, this becomes our 'step of last resort'. At least it was for me. I finally am making the progress that I was never able to before because of this change, and while I still struggle, it definitely is helping me from 'backsliding' and maintain, even if I am trying to get through some mental stuff right now.5 -
I was in a cafe with friends and a lady we knew came over to congratulate me and said to them wasn't I doing really well
One answered her saying I've lost nothing, the surgeon lost it for me
I was sitting eating cheese spread on crackers. They both had fish, chips, peas and a side of cheese toastie
I was going to the pool at 7am to swim lengths for an hour which they then made snide comments about how thier kids like to sleep longer and eat breakfast slowly while watching tv.
How it was cruel to take my child out for walks in an evening
I find those who don't want to dedicate thier time to making lifestyle choices are those that criticise and try and drag others down
They are not worth the heartache2 -
@ruqayyahsmum wow. I am so sorry you had to deal with that and probably continue to do so. I’m learning so much more that surgery and committing to the new lifestyle go hand in hand. I mean I knew it but it just keeps driving that nail home for me. Thank you!0
-
I'm 26 and am 5 Days Post Gastric Sleeve Surgery and leading up I heard it soooooo many times. My Fiancee even told me I was cheating and I should lose it the natural way.1
-
@JessieKat2552 how are you doing after surgery? And isn’t it hard to hear someone say those things? I think many overweight people are so from some sort of emotional struggle. Don’t they know that is exactly the sort of thing that can frail us? I wish you only the best with your weight loss. You deserve it!0
-
@JessieKat2552 I'm shocked that your FIANCEE would think that. This is the person you plan on spending the rest of your life with? I'm not saying you should dump them but you need to take a hard look at your relationship and how their opinions of you are going to affect your mental and physical health going forward. Personally, I would not be in a romantic relationship with someone that didn't support or believe in bariatric surgery.
In regards to this topic overall, I think there will always be people out there that have a negative opinion of the surgery. We all know it's not "easy". I've been very fortunate in that I really haven't had to deal with it too much. A few years ago a couple of my bus passengers expressed some skepticism but they weren't really mean about it. Other than that everyone in my life has been supportive. The fact that six of my co-workers had bariatric surgery also I think helps. My work environment is very friendly and supportive. I believe that positive energy regarding my surgery has helped me in my fitness pursuits.4 -
brendajean316 wrote: »I sent a friend request to someone who writes a lot of blogs that are motivating so I thought I would "friend" her and then her posts would jump into my newsfeed.
She deleted my friend request because I said I was prepping for the lap band surgery. And while she apologized for deleting me, she still made it clear that people who are not struggling the "hard" way need not apply.
Do you get criticized or discriminated against because you opted for surgery?
I have been extremely lucky. My family, friends, and colleagues have been extremely supportive. While VSG has been a lifesaver for me, I wouldn’t call it easy. However, it has been easier than my lifetime of dieting. Of course, I have had zero complications.2 -
I think that no matter what, as long as you are using a safe method to lose weight nobody should have a problem with it. After all, the goal is to make yourself healthier. Whether that's losing weight "the old fashioned way" or surgery, you are working to make YOU better.
If anyone has a problem with that, screw 'em. My sense of peace & self-worth isn't based on what random *kitten* think of me.2 -
Thanks, @StevenGarrigus , I'm learning to adopt that attitude. The people who have reached out to me in support is what has helped me feel not alone and to not take small-minded opinions to heart. I think I'll never leave this group!1
-
WLS is the 'old-fashioned' way, the surgery was developed in the 1960's. It took a long time for insurance companies and the general population to recognize that obesity is a medical condition and start paying for surgery. Still, some insurance companies make people jump through hoops to get coverage.
As my doctor told me being smart or rich can't control your genetics. If so, he said Oprah would be the thinnest healthiest person we see on TV. He said no matter how much some of us diet, we can lose the weight but genetically we are predisposed to being overweight and our bodies will do whatever it takes to put weight back on. He said that WLS evens the scales and if the tool is used correctly you can lose 100% of the weight and keep it off.
I don't know one person who had weight loss surgery that didn't join the professional yo-yo dieters club. My PCP recommended I have the surgery because the yo-yo dieting just wasn't good for me after so many years of up/down weight. I'm grateful for him actually thinking about my future health.
It's been 3+ years, I'm maintaining my weight loss the 'old-fashioned' way. I'm grateful for the tool that evened my odds of keeping the weight off.5 -
No family outside of my immediate family knows I had this surgery. They were already so judgemental when it came to my weight beforehand and because of it I haven't talked to any of them in years, so I figure it's really none of their business. I did this for ME.
1 -
-
I have found that the people who are most critical and opinionated are the people who are the most uninformed. Like it was previously mentioned, people on the general MFP boards are the worst. Part of the problem is that the most negative horror stories or failure stories tend to get repeated more frequently than the success stories. I was pushing 400 lbs and I chose to have surgery to get myself out of a dangerous place more quickly than I could do it on my own, as well as to have the tool of surgery for my own checks and balances. If people want to be judgmental of me because I have had surgery, it's not going to affect me at all, but it really is asinine. I'm a healthy person now, and for someone to criticize me for that in any way makes no sense.5
